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I would like to make a toast to Rachel
and
Joey and to
love ah
love l o v e
love L is for life and what is life
without
love oh my God are we supposed to
answer oh
is
for oh
wow the
V is for this very surprising turn of
events which I am still fine with by the
way is for how extremely normal I find
it that you
two are
together and now one day you might get
married I have children of your
own dude are you okay
totally Ross you don't seem okay I'm
sorry must be the pressure of
entertaining keep your hands off her for
one second oh I think it's nice I think
it's
necessary I I I want to thank you all
for coming my family and my friends
wo I'd really like to say that I'm um
you know what I'd really like to
say I'm
drunk that's right mom and dad your
little hearta is
[Laughter]
hammered and guess what I've been drunk
before and I've smoked a
cigarette you know what you know
what it's all okay it's okay because I
turned 30
today and I can do anything I
want because I am a grown
up where are the jello shots I don't
know Chand supposed to be past
them Chan
helloo well somebody's feeling
better stick out your tongue take off
your
shirt oh oh my oh my God how many of
these did you have these are pure vodka
yeah jell just like Mom used to
[Applause]
make okay how many of that girl are you
seeing how hammered are you huh the
these are Joey's sisters hi Joy sisters
what you
doing I'm taking my ex-girlfriend off my
speed dialer a no no no no it's a good
thing why must we dial so speedily
anyway why must we rush through life why
can't we Savor the precious moments
those are some huge breasts you
have
hello can I get you anything huh lens
cleaner your battery
okay Rachel Ross hi thank God you're
here you have to help me were you just
talking to
yourself that's less embarrassing yes
yes I
was so when she came in I got distracted
and totally forgot about the camera it
kept rolling and recorded
everything yeah we're going to need to
see that
tape what a great idea that'll get
Rachel to forgive me you know what this
is not fair to her let's just forget the
tape thank
you no you're
right Jo no loud and
clear okay this is it you sure you want
to do
[Music]
this hello Mrs
Roo Mr R
waa oh my
God come on beeps hurry hurry hurry
hurry hurry
okay oh my God is everybody getting
married no running in the chapel hey
don't you give me any of your hey hey
hey what are you guys doing here Ross
and Rachel left us a message saying they
were getting married isn't that why you
guys are here yes that but we how else
will we be
here well what happened did we miss it
we actually missed it well maybe you
wouldn't have if you could run in the
chapel this is insane that's the big
deal you know it's not like it's a real
marriage
what yeah if you get married in Vegas
you're only married in Vegas
what are you talking about if you get
married in Vegas you're married
everywhere
really
yeah oh my
God ah
well Daddy needs a new pair of
electromagnetic microscopes for the
prehistoric forensics
Department okay take Pinky Tuscadero up
to Inspiration Point collect three cool
points yeah which gives me five and
let's see who is going to lose their
clothes um I think I pick our strip
poker sponsor Mr Joey
triani all right relax it's just a
shoe okay your band is playing at
Arnolds collect three cool points which
means I have five and that means I get
Joey's boxers
[Applause]
fine gang up on me I got you all right
where I want
you come on take them off actually you
know it's kind of cold so how about I
keep my boxes on and give youall peek at
the good stuff Joker is poker with a
J
coincidence hey that's that's Joe
incidence with a C
[Laughter]
Hey listen man about the stripper yeah
good
call okay little announcement little
announcement I have decided that my best
man is my best friend
Gunther what's my last
name Central Perk
thanks for not marrying
Rachel hey who hey G don't don't forget
your
shirt hey hey what are those got little
party favors check it
out wow yeah oh oh oh
a okay okay announcement want everybody
to know that the position of my best man
is still
open and uh you know so is the position
of the
Bride great
smooth man yeah you got some chili on
your
neck
um um
why have we even been together I don't
know do you do you have do you have any
clothes
on yes really
no but we we didn't
have sex did
we I mean I don't remember much about
last night it was such a
blur oh I remember laughing I laughed a
lot then we didn't have
sex
oh oh I mean we were really drunk I was
glad we didn't do anything stupid tell
me about it hey people I want you to
take a piece of paper here you go and
write down your most embarrassing memory
oh and I do ask that when you're not
using the markers you put the Caps back
on them because they will dry
out L you guys um I don't mean to be a
pain about this but um I've noticed that
some of you are just placing them on you
want to push the
Caps until you hear them
click Gunther where you going I um was
sort of thinking about maybe no no you
can't go no this is fun come on we're
just getting started here here's your
marker listen if you want to go just go
no she'll yell at me
again all right I can get you out
what in a minute I'm going to create a
diversion when I do walk quickly to the
door and don't look
back okay the first person's most
embarrassing memory is Monica your party
sucks right very
funny oh no oh someone forget to use a
coaster
what I don't see
anything great I'm seeing water rings
again okay she's taking the trash out so
I can get you out of here but it has to
be now she'll be back any minute what
about my friend Victor no only the three
of you any more than that and she'll get
suspicious all right let me just get my
coat there isn't
time just leave everything they'll take
care of you next
door is it true they have
beer everything you've heard is
true could you guys please try to keep
it down we're trying to start a bosle
tournament
you and you you're supposed to be at my
party and
Gunther what are you doing here
um hey welcome to the
phe phoi all right I'm sorry but these
people needed me you know they work hard
all week it's Saturday night they
deserve to have a little little fun
go you know my party is fun I mean maybe
it's a little quieter less obvious sort
of fun but you know if people would just
give it a chance and
so to Monica and Chandler and that
knocked up girl in
Ohio I'm just so happy you guys are
finally getting a kid I know have you
considered pageon
thing I can't believe they called I mean
we're actually getting a
baby well I know how you
feel really sure I went through the
exact same thing with Alicia May
Emery the waiting the
wondering then one day I get that call
from Toys R
Us she was in stock
that is the exact same
thing wait wait wait wait I remember
being in a chapel wait they they they
would not let us get married when we
were that drunk they let you get married
when you're drunk most people get
married in Vegas are
drunk now I'm drunk right
now I can't have a mimosa with breakfast
I'm on
vacation what are you guys going to do
oh I guess we just find a divorce lawyer
well I think I think Ross already has
one now this one's free right because
you paid for the first two so you get
the third one
for laugh it up but the joke's on you
because we don't need to get divorced
okay we we're just going to get an
analment an analment Ross I don't think
surgery is the answer
here oh oh that's your
thing what your thing you're thing you
know that you're the guy who gets
divorced that's not my
thing I do not love getting divorced yes
you do this is your third
divorce you love divorced so much you're
probably going to marry it and
then then it won't work out so you're
going to have to divorce it divorcing
guy I'm so
drunk you don't you think you've had
enough to drink I'm just helping the
kids
how is you drinking helping the kids
because the more I drink the less there
is for the kids to
drink Mr tribiani your generous
contribution brings us a big step closer
to building the youth center just out of
curiosity how how much is that boat
worth I think it was valued at
19,000 yeah that was pretty close
uh so bad news um I can't buy the boat I
don't have any money
[Music]
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