By
Viewed
894,375
Please choose the correct answer for each question below:
Questions: 0/372
Correct: 0
Translate:
try to imagine this the phone bill
arrives but you don't pay it right away
why not because you're a
c instead you wait until they send you a
notice I could do that okay okay then uh
you let me go grocery shopping and I buy
laundry detergent but it's not the one
with the easy poor spout why would
someone do
that one might wonder
someone's left a glass on the coffee
table there's no coaster it's a cold
drink it's a hot day little beads of
condensation are inching their way
closer and closer to the surface of the
wood stop
it oh my God it's true who am I Monica
your mom
[Applause]
go to bed guys all right night Monica M
you're going to leave your shoes out
here
uhhuh really just just casually strewn
about in that Reckless halfhazard
man doesn't matter I'll get him tomorrow
or
not
whenever she is a cook
[Music]
if it bothers you that much just go out
and get the
shoes no don't do this this is stupid I
don't have to prove anything I'm going
to go get
them but then everyone will know
unless I get them and then wake up
really early and put them back oh I need
help M uh Chandler was just saying how
beautiful your sweater is oh thank you
Chandler I just bought it oh yes well
it's very beautiful and it's cream
colored and tight
and I mean tight I mean it's not too
tight not that I was looking
at what's the matter with
him I think he's stoned again
what what dude I need to talk to you a
[Music]
sec okay I think I might know why my
parents don't like you you do why okay
remember we were young hey spring break
sophomore year I I got high in my
bedroom and my parents walked in and
smelled it and so I told them that you
had gotten stoned and jumped out the
window what why did you do that I don't
know uh your was the first name that
that popped into my head I'm I'm sorry I
didn't I didn't think it' matter how
could it not matter well how was I
supposed to know we'd end up being
friends after college let alone you
you'd be living with my sister what
about all that friends forever stuff I
don't know I I was all
high mom and dad just sent me in here to
find out if you were trying to get Raw
Stone your parents caught raw smoking
pot in college and he blamed on me Ross
I can't believe you do that the reason
we haven't told them we're together is
because they hate me okay so will you
fix this okay okay I'll tell them it
wasn't Chandler who got high okay now
who should I say it
was you it's not like it's a big deal
you you don't still do it or anything
all right all right now now who should I
say tricked me into doing
it let's go oh yeah yeah about telling
Mom and Dad I was thinking about maybe
writing a letter you know what that's it
you've had your chance what Mom Dad raw
smoked pot in college
whatt you are such a tattle
tail mom
dad you remember that that time you
walked in my room and smelled marijuana
yes yes
well I told you it was Chandler who was
smoking the pot
but it was me I'm sorry it was you and
Dad you know that mailman that you got
fired didn't steal your Playboys
rosted yeah well Hurricane Gloria didn't
break the porch swing Monica
Ross hasn't worked at the museum for a
year Monica and Cher are living
together Ross married Rachel in Vegas
and got divorced
again that's a lot of information to get
in 30
seconds all right Monica why you felt
you had to hide the fact that you're an
important relationship is beyond me and
we kind of figured about the porch
swing Ras drugs divorced
again what happened son I I uh I got
tricked into all those
things
Chandler you've been Ross's best friend
all these years stuck by him during the
drug problems
and now you've taken on Monica as well
well I don't know what to say you're a
wonderful human
being thank you no thank
you Monica and Ross I don't know what
I'm going to do about the two of
you I'll talk to
them really excited about our wedding
plans and well I guess pretty soon we be
making a big withdrawal from the Monica
wedding
fund what you tell her Jack I can't do
it what happened you still have the
Monica wedding fund don't you we have it
only now we call it a beach
house I can't believe you spent my
wedding fund on the beach house we're
sorry honey but we just assumed if you
got married after you turned 30 you'd
pay for it yourself you bought the beach
house when I was 23 which means you had
seven years of Beach fun and you can't
put a price on that
sweetie I really do feel bad about this
though we started saving again when you
were dating Richard but then that went
to hell so we redid the
kitchen what about when I started dating
Chandler well it was Chandler we didn't
think he'd ever
proposed clearly I did not start
drinking enough at the start of the
meal I can't believe it that there is no
money for my wedding we might still have
some money if you your father hadn't
thought it was a good idea to sell ice
over the Internet it seemed like such a
simple idea stupid Jack the word is
stupid all right enough I don't want to
hear about it
anymore good luck
Chandler looks like she didn't leave in
such a hurry after all oh I think this
is the episode of Three's Company where
there's some kind of
misunderstanding then I've already seen
this one
are you through with
that yeah sorry the swallowing slowed me
down whose little ball of paper is this
oh that would be mine see uh I wrote a
note to myself and then I realized I
didn't need the note so I balded it up
and now I wish I was
dead she already fuff that pillow Monica
you know you already fuff but it's
fine look I'm sorry guys I just don't
want to give them any more ammunition
than they already have yes and we all
know how cruel a parent can be about the
flag
of a child's
pillow Monica hi
um Monica um you're scaring
me I mean you're like you're like all
chaotic and twirly you know Ian and not
not in a good
way yeah calm down you don't see Ross
getting all chaotic and twirly every
time they come that's because as far as
my parents are concerned Ross can do no
wrong you see he's the prince apparently
they had some big ceremony before I was
born probably never be able to make it
up to you but here's a
start what's this it's the key to my
Porsche well the key to your
Porsche what
what I've been thinking of getting rid
of it and I was driving it the other day
and I saw my reflection in a store
window your mother's right I do look
like an ass
you're giving me your pores you're
kidding me right wait wait wait wait a
minute I mean a couple of stupid boxes
get wet and she gets a
Porsche why don't we take it for a spin
all right what what about me I'm a
medical Marvel your boyfriend has been
in there for over an hour can't believe
it it's like I'm living with him again
he's here when I go to sleep he's here
when I wake up he's here when I want to
use the shower feel like I'm 16 all over
again well you're not 16
you're both adults now get out you
doofers or you know he's rubber in your
glue all
yours I hope you cleaned your hair out
of the drain I hope you clean your hair
out of the drain shut up shut up cut it
out me me me
[Music]
I've never wanted you
more I want to watch Entertainment
Tonight tough nuggies were watching
predators of the serengetti
you guys stop it's my TV what quit it
bite me oh my god well M keeps changing
the channel a that's great why don't you
tell Mommy on
me now I'm mommy in this little play all
right look I refuse to get sucked into
this like weird little Geller dimension
thing okay so I'm going to go and take a
nice long hot bubble bath because you
kids are driving me
crazy your nails oh I know I never wear
fake ones I just did it so my mom
wouldn't give me grief about biting them
oh no I meant it's weird that you only
have nine
now oh my
God wait a minute I had him when I put
oh my God it's in the
kiche oh my God okay don't panic I'm
going to go to the store I'm G to get
you another set of nails no one's going
to know and you're going to look
great oh oh it's cuz they're going to
eat that's the
problem honey don't bite your
nails okay uh please don't freak out um
but uh there's a blue fingernail in in
one of the kich cups and there's no way
to know which
one and whoever finds it wins the
prize hey you feeling better yeah I
think that fifth shower actually got the
interview off
me so do you have any other
possibilities oh yeah well there is the
possibility that I won't make rent if
you want I can lend you some money no no
no cuz if I couldn't pay you back right
away then I'd feel guilty and tense
every time I saw you oh okay well then
why don't you uh why you borrow it from
Mom and Dad if you feel guilty and tense
around them already you might as well
make some money off of
[Applause]
[Music]
them hi hi hi darling so what's this
some of your old stuff well sweetie we
have a surprise for you we're turning
your room into a
gym wow that is a surprise just one
little question uh why not Ross's room
gosh we talked about that but your
brother has so many science trophies and
plaques and merit badges well we didn't
want to disturb them oh God
[Applause]
forbid you know that Stephie graph has
quite a
tush I'm just saying it's right
there hey guys hi darling where's my
grandson you didn't bring him no he's at
uh Carol's and Susan's today a woman in
my my office as a
lesbian I'm just
saying oh Jack look there's that house
fank commercial that cracks you
up where have you been emotional hell so
did they lend you the money yet no but
that's probably because I haven't asked
them yet come on Monica do it hey you
guys um Monica has some
news um yeah so uh listen I'm sorry I
didn't tell you this before but um I I'm
no longer at my job I I had to leave it
why because they made
me you were
fired what are you going to do Judy Judy
relax this is our little harmonica we're
talking about we taught her well 10% of
your paycheck where does it go in the
bank the
bank there you go so she dips into her
savings that's what it's there for she's
going to be fine and if you need a
little extra you know where to find it
anything larger back
there okay here you go you can pay me
back whenever you
like you have dinosaur
checks yeah yeah I mean you get your
money and you learn a little something
what's wrong with that nothing nothing
hey you're a cheap
asaurus I'm kidding no kidding thank you
I'm very grateful hey M what is
this oh um that was my bathing suit from
high school I was a little bigger then
Oh I thought that's what they used to
cover Connecticut when it rained okay
there's no way that you look like Ross's
mother then why would he say it because
he's crazy okay he came up to me earlier
and thanked me for my very moving
performance in
Titanic my mother's right
never going to get married you know what
that
is who wouldn't want
you please I'm a single mom with a
30-year-old
son oh
God Ross it's
[Music]
Nana
hey oh go
yeah so uh how's she doing the doctor
says it's a matter of
hours H how are you Mom me I'm fine fine
I'm glad you're
here what's with your hair
what what's different nothing oh maybe
that's
it she is unbelievable her mother is
relax relax okay we are going to be here
for a while it looks like and we still
have boyfriends in your career to cover
oh
[Music]
God the fuzzy little mints at the bottom
of her purse
oh yeah they were
gross oh you know what I love her sweet
and Low's how she was always stealing
them from from restaurants not just
restaurants from our house
Mrs
Keller she looks so small I
know well at least she's with pop pop
and Aunt Phyllis
now goodbye
Nana bye man
what what is going on you know how the
nurse said that that nah had had passed
well she's not
quite what she's not past she's present
she's back what's going on she may have
died she may have died we're looking
into it
um I'll go
see this almost never
[Music]
happens now she's pass
[Music]
Related Songs