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I hope you're hungry. We're starting
with oysters.
You know what they say about oysters,
don't you?
>> They have parasites.
>> No. Um, well, some people say that
oysters are an aphrodisiac.
>> What people?
>> People say it.
Come here.
So, oysters, huh?
>> And then we're going to have a little um
Middle Eastern couscous. Something we
can eat with our hands.
>> You know, it's funny. When we were
studying communicable diseases,
>> No, no, no, no, no.
>> It's sensual.
>> Oh, didn't know. Okay.
>> Okay.
Oh, no.
>> I'm sorry, sweetie. It's the hospital.
The food looks great. Maybe save me
some. I can't promise anything
about how it's it's an end of an era.
>> Oh, all right.
>> But, you know, I got to say, I don't I
don't think six years counts as an era.
>> An era is defined as a significant
period of time. Now, it was significant
for me. Maybe it wasn't significant to
you.
>> What is the matter with you?
>> What is the matter with you?
Why are you more upset? Aren't you going
to be sad that we that we're not living
together anymore? Aren't you going to
miss me at all, Monica? All right, but
don't get mad at me. I
It's It's just a little hard to believe.
What's hard to believe? Well, you know,
I mean, it's you guys. You You do this
kind of stuff, you know? I mean, you you
were going to get married in Vegas and
then you backed out. It's I guess I'm
not upset because I don't see you
actually going through with it. I'm
sorry.
Rachel,
it's going to happen.
Chandler is going to move in here. But I
I know we we just let me finish, okay?
This isn't something that we just just
impulsively decided to do in in Vegas.
This is something that we both really
want
and it is going to happen.
>> It is.
Really?
Yeah, sweetie.
You mean we're we're not going to live
together anymore?
>> No.
What?
Oh my god. I'm going to miss you so
much.
>> What if it's you?
>> I mean, it's the end of an era.
>> I know.
>> Why is everybody using these tiny little
lights nowadays? I remember when people
used to use big lights. That's a good
story, Grandpa.
>> Hey.
>> Hey.
>> Wow.
Monica's letting other people help
decorate her tree. Did someone get her
drunk again? Or
>> having a perfectly decorated tree is not
what Christmas is about. It's about
being with the people that you love.
>> That is nice. And we're done. Tada.
>> I don't know what it is. Just doesn't
quite feel like Christmas to me. Oh,
yes.
>> See, now it feels like Christmas.
>> Hey, what are you doing here? Shouldn't
you be at work?
>> Uh, they sent me home. They said I can't
work if I'm sick.
>> I'm so sorry that you're sick.
>> I'm not sick.
I don't get sick. Getting sick is for
weeklings. It's for pansies.
Honey, no one thinks that you're a
pansy, but we do think that you need a
tissue.
>> I have not been sick in over 3 years.
>> I'm going to grab you some tissue. I
>> I don't need a tissue. I'm fine.
>> When you put a D at the end of fine,
you're not fine.
>> I'm fine.
I'm fine.
You know, it's a really hard word to
say.
>> Okay. So, what do you what do you want
to do? Let's do something crazy.
>> I know. Let's rest and drink lots of
fluids.
>> Okay, I'll rest. But, you know, if I'm
going to bed, then you're coming with
me.
>> See, that would be impossible to resist
if you weren't all
drippy here.
Are you saying that you don't want to
get with this?
[Laughter]
>> Yeah, I don't think you should say that
even when you're healthy.
>> Come on.
>> Don't take this personally, okay? It's
just that I just can't have sex with a
sick person now.
>> I'm with you, Chandler. I mean, I can't
have sex with a sick person either. It's
disgusting. But I'm not sick. Let me
prove it to you.
We are two healthy people and the bribe
of live.
>> See, that's the thing. I would like to
stay in the priv.
>> Oh, what is it, honey? You need some
tea? Some soup?
Oh,
>> calling Dr. Big. Dr. Big to the bed.
>> Oh, jeez. Honey, I thought I thought you
were asleep.
>> How can I be asleep? Know that you were
the next room.
>> I was asleep.
>> Oh, no. No, no, honey. You know what's
sexy? Layers.
>> Layers are sexy. And blankets are sexy.
And oh, hot water bottles are sexy.
>> Come on, get it to bed. I want to prove
to you that I'm not sick. I want to make
you feel as good as I feel. Ash,
>> please get some rest.
>> I'm fine.
[Laughter]
Uh, Chandler was just saying how
beautiful your sweater is.
>> Oh, thank you, Chandler. I just bought
it.
>> Oh, yes. as well. It's very beautiful
and it's cream colored and tight and
I don't mean tight. I mean it's not too
tight. Not that I was looking at
>> What's the matter with him?
>> I think he's stoned again.
>> What?
>> What?
>> Dude, I need to talk to you a sec.
>> Okay. I think I might know why my
parents don't like you. You do? Why?
>> Okay. Remember we were young.
>> Hey,
>> spring break, sophomore year, I I got
high in my bedroom and my parents walked
in and smelled it and so I told them
that you had gotten stoned and jumped
out the window.
>> What? Why did you do that?
>> I don't know. Uh, yours was the first
name that that popped into my head. I'm
I'm sorry. I didn't I didn't think it'd
matter.
>> How could it not matter? Well, how was I
supposed to know we'd end up being
friends after college? Let alone knew
you you'd be living with my sister.
>> What about all that friends forever
stuff?
>> I don't know. I I was all high.
>> Mom and dad just sent me in here to find
out if you were trying to get Ross
stoned.
>> Your parents caught Ross smoking pot in
college and he blamed it on me.
>> Ross, I can't believe you do that.
>> The reason we haven't told them we're
together is because they hate me. Okay.
So, will you fix this?
>> Okay. Okay. I'll tell them it wasn't
Chandler who got high. Okay.
>> Now, who should I say it was?
>> You. It's not like it's a big deal. You
You don't still do it or anything.
>> All right. All right. Now, now, who
should I say tricked me into doing it?
>> Let's go.
>> Oh, yeah. About telling mom and dad. I
was thinking about maybe writing a
letter. All right. You know what? That's
it. You've had your chance.
>> What?
>> Mom, Dad, Ross smoked pot in college.
>> What?
>> You are such a tattletail.
>> Mom, Dad,
you remember that that time you walked
in my room and smelled marijuana?
>> Yes.
>> Yes.
Well, I told you it was Chandler who was
smoking the pot, but
it was me. I'm sorry.
>> It was you. And Dad, you know that
mailman that you got fired didn't steal
your Playboys? Ross did.
[Laughter]
>> Yeah. Well, Hurricane Gloria didn't
break the porch swing. Monica dead.
>> Ross hasn't worked at the museum for a
year.
>> Monica and Chandler are living together.
>> Boss married Rachel in Vegas and got
divorced again.
>> That's a lot of information to get in 30
seconds.
All right, Monica. Why you felt you had
to hide the fact that you're in an
important relationship is beyond me.
>> And we kind of figured about the porch
swing.
>> Brass, drugs, divorced again.
>> What happened, son? I I uh I got tricked
into all those things.
Chandler,
you've been Ross's best friend all these
years. Stuck by him during the drug
problems.
And now you've taken on Monica as well.
>> Well, I don't know what to say. You're a
wonderful human being.
>> Thank you.
>> No, thank you,
Monica and Ross. I don't know what I'm
going to do about the two of you.
>> I'll talk to them
>> on the platform ready to dance the world
into the new millennium and the guy
yells, "Cut."
>> Wait a minute. So, you guys are telling
me that you actually did the routine
from 8th grade?
>> Yeah. But, of course, we had to update
it a little bit. But, hey, by the way,
quick thinking about catching me.
Yeah, cuz I was going to say there's no
way you could have done the end the way
you guys did it back then.
>> What? We could do it.
>> I don't know. I mean, you're a lot
bigger. I mean, stronger back then.
>> I can do it. Okay, come on. Let's go.
>> One, two, three, four, five, six, seven,
eight.
>> I can't do it.
Now you do that, you're on TV. You
>> sold a story to Aren't you comics?
>> Oh my god, that's so great. Oh wow,
you're a Polish writer. I wish I had a
present for you.
>> Wait a minute.
>> My last kid could get more.
>> You want to share it?
>> Okay. Okay.
Hey. Hey.
>> Okay, Jan. Look, I know you're mad, but
I just want to say I'm sorry. I I was a
total jerk. Completely o over the line.
I just I hate pulp, you know. You know
how Monica feels about lowfat
mayonnaise.
>> Not me.
>> Sorry, peeps. I I guess I'm just really
sad that I'm leaving. I'm going to miss
you so much.
>> Well, this doesn't have to be so sad,
though. You know, maybe instead of just
thinking about how much you're going to
miss each other, you should like think
about some of the things that you're not
going to miss.
>> I don't think there's anything.
>> Come on. There's got to be something.
>> Oh, she's perfect.
>> I have one.
Great. Okay, you can go first. Uh, well,
I guess I'm not going to miss the fact
that you're never allowed to move the
phone pin.
>> Good. That's a good one. Okay, Monica,
anything you know, does Rachel move the
phone pin?
>> A sometimes.
>> Always actually.
>> Okay, good. There you go. Doesn't
everyone feel better?
Not just the foam pin.
I never get my messages.
>> You get your messages?
>> Yeah. Well, I don't think it really
counts if you have to read them off the
back of your hand after you fall asleep
on the couch. So So you missed a message
from who? Chandler or your mom
or Chandler or your mom?
>> Great. It worked. No one's sad.
>> Hang out with you guys two nights in a
row. I'm so sorry.
>> Wh Why did she not want to hang out with
us?
>> Because she uh she she thinks that you
or blah
and and that uh you Monica are uh too
loud.
>> What?
>> What?
>> So she was just pretending to have a
good time last night. She was lying to
our faces.
>> I can't believe this. I mean, who is she
to judge us? We could not have been
nicer to her. And I am not blah. I am a
hoot.
>> No, come on. Please, please, you guys
don't don't be mad. I'm sure she just
she just said that stuff because she was
nervous cuz you guys are like my best
friends, you know, and it was our first
date. Plus, she's really sick.
>> No, you she No, you said you made that
up.
>> I know, but don't you think the sick
thing is way better than the play thing?
>> They're both good. I generally just go
with Monica's drunk again.
Come on, you guys. Come on. Please.
Please just give her another chance.
Huh? She'll come around. I promise.
>> Of course we will. Come on. We got to
make dinner.
>> Okay.
>> I do not like that woman.
>> I can hear you.
>> I am loud.
>> I'm so sorry. Please stop freaking out.
>> I'm not freaking out.
[Laughter]
Why would I be freaking out? A woman
named Hildy called and said we were
getting married, but that happens every
day.
>> Honey, we were at this beautiful place
and I I I just put our names down for
fun. I mean, what's the harm in that?
>> Right here, Mom.
>> Chandler, please don't think I was
trying to pressure you. Phoebe and
Rachel just thought
>> Phoebe and Rachel. So the people that
knew about our wedding before me were
you, Phoebe and Rachel, Hildy, and
apparently some band called the
Starlight Magic 7, who are available, by
the way.
>> It was a mistake. Please don't take this
to mean anything because it doesn't.
>> Okay.
>> Really?
>> Yes. It really doesn't mean anything
because you know that I'm just not
ready.
>> I know. I know.
>> Okay.
>> All right. I'm going to go tell Joey
that that you're back. He's really
worried about you.
>> Hey, did she buy it?
>> Totally.
>> So, did Hildy show you the place?
>> Yeah. It's beautiful.
>> Yeah.
I can't believe you're going to ask
Monica to marry you.
>> I know.
[Applause]
>> Hey,
>> dude. Some guy just called for you.
>> Who was it?
>> I don't know. How about thanks for
taking the message. Jeez.
>> Hey, listen. You know, when you move in,
Rachel's room's going to be empty. You
want to talk about what we want to do
with it?
>> Sure.
>> Okay. I was thinking we should have a
beautiful guest room, right? with um a
mahogany sleigh bed and bedside tables
with flowers on it all the time. And
then we can have like a roll top desk
with little comment cards so people can
tell us how much they love staying here.
>> Hey, whatever. You know, I really
haven't thought about it that much.
>> Well, I like that idea obviously,
but I was thinking maybe maybe it could
be a game room, you know? I mean, you
can buy old arcade games like uh like
Space Invaders and Asteroids for $200.
The real ones, the big big big ones.
No.
>> Okay. So, you mean no as in G Chandler?
What an interesting idea. Let's discuss
it before we reject it completely.
>> Oh, I'm sorry. Of course.
Yes. Interesting idea. Um, talk about
it, but no.
>> So, that's it.
>> I just don't think that, you know,
arcade games go in the beautiful guest
room. The beautiful guest room is going
to be filled with antiques,
>> which is why Asteroids is perfect. It's
the oldest game.
>> What do you have against the beautiful
guest room?
>> Nothing. I don't have anything against
the beautiful guest room, especially
since everybody that we know lives about
30 seconds away.
>> Are you mocking me?
>> No, I'm not mocking you or your
beautiful giggler.
>> Okay.
>> And your horoscope says, "On the 5th, a
special someone is going to give you a
gift."
>> Oh, well, thank you in advance. H.
>> Oh, but the 12th brings a lover's spat.
>> You're going to make a joke about my
special present.
>> Why would you do that?
>> Oh, wait. And on the 19th, a secret
crush announces itself.
[Music]
>> Okay.
Call me when you get there. Okay.
>> Okay.
>> Really going to miss you.
Oh, yeah. I have your key.
>> Here you go. Thanks. Yeah.
>> Oh god, this is silly. I'm going to see
you in a couple of hours.
Bye, house.
Bye babe.
>> Bye.
[Music]
She really left.
>> I know.
>> Thank you.
>> No problem, Roomie.
>> Can I ask you a question?
>> Sure.
>> What the hell is that dog doing here?
>> Oh my god.
[Applause]
Chandler.
And all my life,
I never thought I would be so lucky
is to fall in love with my best.
My best.
There's a reason why girls don't do
this.
>> Okay. Okay. Okay. I'll do it. I thought
we I can do this.
I thought that it mattered what I said
or where I said it.
Then I realized
the only thing that matters is that you
You make me happier than I ever thought
I could be.
And if you let me,
I will spend the rest of my life trying
to make you feel the same way.
Monica,
>> will you marry me?
>> Yes.
[Applause]
>> I knew you were likely to take a wife.
>> Can we come in yet? I'm dying out here.
>> Come in. Come in.
>> You're engaged.
>> This is the least jealous I've ever
been.
>> Oh, no. Wait. No. This is wrong. Ross
isn't here.
>> Oh, Hilly's done this three times. He
knows what it's about. Okay.
[Music]
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