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(indistinct chatter)
Champagne?
Oh, I'm fine, thank you.
These are for me.
Are-are you all right?
No, I'm very nervous.
That's interesting.
Normally, I'm the one
who's unsure of himself
in a social situation,
but tonight, it's you.
(chuckles) Yeah.
Frickin' fascinating.
Dr. Sturgis,
good to see you.
Dr. Linkletter.
Please meet
my girlfriend,
Connie Tucker.
Nice to meet you, Dr. Tucker.
I'm not a doctor.
But I would like
to point out,
she's quite real.
I can see that.
And our
relationship
is more
than just friends.
That's enough.
In fact,
it's flat-out erotic.
Change the subject, John.
You got it,
girlfriend.
Dr. Linkletter
is working
on an intriguing theory
of quantum gravity.
Is that so?
He can explain it
much better than I can.
Are you familiar
at all
with string theory?
Remind me.
Well, basically, it's a string
theoretic interpretation
of the graviton.
Every force is an exchange
of particles.
Gravity is the exchange
of gravitons.
Meemaw, are you even listening?
MEEMAW:
What?
The graviton
is a massless string.
The graviton is
a massless string.
Wow!
Well, yes, it is.
(chuckles)
When did
you learn that?
I get around.
In fact,
I would go so far as to say
that every force is an exchange
of particles,
and gravity is
an exchange of gravitons.
Correct!
Yes!
(laughs)
John, where have you
been hiding her?
I haven't.
I've talked about her
quite a bit,
but you all said she was
a figment of my imagination.
(chuckles)
(chuckles)
She's dynamite.
(Linkletter and Sturgis laugh)
Hello. I'd like to speak
to Arthur Jeffries.
He plays Professor Proton.
But you probably know that,
since you answer the phone
at the station
that makes the show,
you lucky duck.
Then I'd like to leave him
another message.
Please tell him Sheldon Cooper
called again
and that
I've successfully obtained
the radioactive material
that I'm looking for.
Yes, americium-241.
I have lots of it.
I live at 5501 Grant Avenue,
Medford, Texas.
If you're sending me
an autographed picture,
I already have one.
Ooh, how about one
of his bow ties?
And then Bryan Larkin
read the letter
out loud in the hall.
No.
Georgie used the word "love,"
like, 30 times.
It was pathetic.
That hurts to hear.
Really? I think it's hilarious.
Also, my math teacher's
pregnant.
Well, that's nice.
(quietly):
It might not be her husband's.
Whose do you think it is?
Hey.
Hey.
Going somewhere?
Alaska.
Gonna work on the pipeline.
Alaska, huh?
That-That's pretty far.
Not far enough,
but it'll have to do.
Look, Georgie,
I know it feels bad
right now, but...
I promise it'll get better.
How's it gonna get better?
Veronica thinks I'm a jerk,
and everyone in the school's
calling me Lovey Cooper.
Ooh, that is not a good name.
It doesn't matter, 'cause I'm
never going back to that school.
Listen to me.
Hey.
You're a good-looking kid,
and you got a big heart.
Once we get you
on a daily shower schedule,
the girls
are gonna be lining up.
I don't want girls.
I want Veronica.
Yeah, maybe you'll get her
and maybe you won't.
But someday,
you'll find the woman
who was really meant for you.
You mean like
Kathryn Dempsey?
Alaska's beautiful.
How 'bout I go with you?
Who's Kathryn Dempsey?
I was 15 years--
I was 15 years old!
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