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MARY: Sheldon, dinner!
SHELDON: Coming.
Sorry I'm late.
Shalom.
(sighs)
What's on your head?
A yarmulke.
A yama-what?
It's a special Jewish hat.
It reminds the wearer
that God is always over you.
(laughing)
Mom.
Oh, come on, it's funny.
It's not funny
and it's not a yarmulke.
It is a coaster I crocheted
at Bible camp.
Are you gonna say
something to him?
Normally I would, but I got
bigger problems right now.
Let's just say grace.
SHELDON: Hold on.
Are these
hot dogs kosher?
(laughing, snorts)
(violin screeching)
ADULT SHELDON:
Over the next few days,
I continued to play the violin
in an effort to replicate
the mental prowess of Einstein.
I was asked to confine
my practice to the garage
by my father, mother,
sister and brother.
Meemaw was fine with me
practicing in the house,
but why would she care?
She doesn't live with us.
Hey, George.
Hey, Herschel.
Let me guess,
you're here to complain
about Sheldon's violin playing.
Under normal circumstances,
I'd say yeah,
but since he started,
my chickens been
dropping eggs like crazy.
That's weird.
Hey, uh,
I hear congratulations
are in order.
What's that you hear?
Maybe I didn't hear it.
Never mind.
It's all right.
Seems like everybody knows.
You don't seem
terribly enthusiastic.
(sighs)
It's the money, Herschel.
It's all about the money.
(sighs) Well, there's only one
solution to that.
Which is?
You got to make more money.
Thank you.
Welcome.
Hey, I got to ask,
did that fiddle playing
increase the fertility
in all the females
around here or just
my chickens? (chuckles)
I was just throwing it
out there, never mind.
Wait here, I'm-a go
get you some eggs.
That's okay.
You're getting eggs.
Guess I'm getting eggs.
PETERSEN:
All right, George,
what's so damn important?
Well...
I don't want to get into
the why's and wherefore's,
but I'm gonna
need a raise.
Is this 'cause Mary's pregnant?
You got to be kidding me.
Does everybody in this damn town
know my business?
I just-- it was taking a guess.
Tom.
My wife told me.
Doesn't matter. What do you say?
Are you threatening to quit
if you don't get it?
No, Tom, I'm threatening
to rob a bank.
Okay.
All right, well,
let's not do that.
$100 a week do the trick?
Yes. Thanks. Bye.
(line ringing)
RECEPTIONIST (over phone):
Temple Judea,
how can I help you?
Hello, I'd like
to become Jewish.
Who would be in charge of that?
How old are you?
I'm ten.
Please hold.
("Hava Nagila" hold music plays)
RABBI: Hello, this is
Rabbi Schneiderman.
To whom am I speaking?
Hello, this is Sheldon Cooper.
Hello, Sheldon.
Um, how can I help you?
I'm currently a Baptist and
I'd like to convert to Judaism.
A Baptist named Sheldon.
Okay.
And why do you want to convert?
Very simple. It's my intention
to become a great scientist
and I couldn't help but notice
most of the great scientists
are Jewish, so logic dictates
it's time to switch teams.
Well, I'm sure there are
many Baptist scientists
you could emulate.
That's kind of you to say,
but other than Cornelis Drebbel
in the 1500s,
it's pretty slim pickings.
(chuckles)
Well, Sheldon, you sound like
a very smart young man.
Oh, you have no idea.
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