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ADULT SHELDON: The good name of Lady Science
had been besmirched and it was up to me to defend her honor.
I had a lot of ground to cover in one night.
Thankfully, 11 years of my family's incessant yammering
had given me an extraordinary ability to focus.
But I want to watch Fresh Prince.
Too bad. The game is on.
There's always a game on. Dad?
Sorry, kid, it's the Cowboys.
But it's the season premiere.
Fresh Prince's family gets tickets
to the People's Choice Awards.
I'm not missing it.
"Present investigations aim to establish
"a constructional system.
That is, an epistemic, logical system of objects..."
My show's only 30 minutes.
Yours is three hours.
But yours don't have them cheerleaders
jumping up and down. Mom?
What if we don't turn the TV on at all and we play a board game?
Come on. Seriously?
SHELDON: "So that a genealogy
"of concepts results, in which each one
has its definite place."
MARY: Shelly, it's your turn.
Shelly?
What's happening?
We're playing a board game.
Before dinner?
You ate dinner.
(doorbell rings)
Did I like it?
You said the meat loaf was dry.
That sounds right.
Hi, Brenda. I just wanted to see how today went.
Oh. (clears throat)
(groans) Not great.
Sheldon is already in some sort of fight
with his philosophy professor.
About what? Currently, he's plotting
"the destruction of her worldview,"
whatever that means. Sounds exciting.
It's mostly him reading a book and giggling to himself.
How about Billy?
Not much better.
Oh. In Spanish class,
every time the teacher said "Sí," Billy said, "See what?"
Oh, Billy.
I know, but if I don't laugh about it I'll cry.
I'm sorry.
How did Missy do?
I think Missy had the best day of her life.
(exhales): Oh, thank God. Tell me everything.
Well, in one class she sits between her friends,
so the note-passing goes through her.
She's gonna get the dirt firsthand. That's huge.
And then an eighth-grade boy talked to her at lunch.
On the first day? Uh-huh.
She's gonna be prom queen. I'm calling it.
(laughs) That's fun,
but let's not get ahead of ourselves.
Mary, it'll be a miracle
if Billy even makes it to high school.
Don't take this away from me.
Missy is gonna look so cute in that tiara.
Yes, she is.
That's the Fresh Prince.
He's from West Philadelphia.
Born and raised.
ADULT SHELDON: It was past my bedtime,
but who could sleep with a page-turner
like Meditations on First Philosophy by René Descartes?
Descartes was more than just a philosopher.
He was also the mathematician
who invented the Cartesian plane.
If you've ever enjoyed that X squared
plus Y squared equals K is a circle,
you can say merci beaucoup to Monsieur Descartes.
Hello?
Bonjour, Sheldon.
Bonjour, René Descartes.
Please, sit.
I see you're reading a book on philosophy by Aristotle.
I am. And it is garbage!
Aristotle is, how you say, a punk!
I'm also having trouble with my philosophy professor.
Hmm? She says that we don't know if science is true.
Mon dieu!
Without science, we know nothing.
No different than the dogs and kitties in the street
wandering around in a fog of ignorance
with the woofings and the meowings.
So how do I get her to understand that science
can form true beliefs about reality as it really is?
Ah, young man.
You are you asking what is the foundation
of knowledge, huh?
Yes. Well, hold on to your chapeau.
I'm not wearing a chapeau.
It is just an expression.
Sorry.
All knowledge must rest
on a foundation that we can never doubt and that is...
Of course.

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