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[Music]
All right. There's a nuclear holocaust.
I'm the last man on Earth. Would you go
out with me?
I've got canned goods.
Hey guys, take a look at this. Check
this baby out. Dug me a hole.
Excellent hole, Joe.
Oh no. No. My whole world.
What? What? What is it? Jellyfish sting.
Ow. It hurts. It hurts. It hurts. Look,
can we help? You want us to take you
back to the house? Oh, it's like 2
miles. Yeah. And I'm a little tired from
digging the hole.
Damn the jellyfish.
Damn all the jellyfish.
I got to do something. Well, there's
really only one thing you can do. What?
What is it? You're going to have to pee
on it.
What?
Wow. Don't blame me. I saw it on the
Discovery Channel. You know what? He's
right. There's something like uh ammonia
in that that kills the pain. Well,
forget it. It doesn't hurt that bad.
If you want some privacy, you can use my
hole.
Pass the cheese, please.
My god, you can't even look at me, can
you? Nope.
Yay, it's Phoebe. We can talk to Phoebe.
No, I'm I'm too depressed to talk. I'll
give you $1,000 to talk to us.
Hey, you guys, what do you what do you
think about making that beach trip an
annual thing? No.
All right, that's it, you guys. What
happened out there? What? We took a
walk. Nothing happened. I came back with
nothing all over me.
Come on. What happened, Joey?
All right. No, Joey. We swore we'd never
tell. They'll never understand.
We have to say something. We have to get
it out. It's eating me alive.
Monica got stung by a jellyfish. All
right.
All right.
I got stung.
Stung bad.
I couldn't stand. I I couldn't walk. We
were two miles from the house.
We're scared and alone.
We didn't think we could make it.
I was in too much pain. And I was tired
from digging the huge hole.
[Applause]
And then Joey remembered something.
I'd seen this thing on the Discovery
Channel. Wait a minute. I saw that on
the Discovery Channel. Yeah. About
jellyfish and how if you
Ew,
you peed on yourself.
E,
you can't say that. You You don't know.
I thought I was going to pass out from
the pain. Anyway, I I tried, but I I
couldn't been that way.
So,
that's right. I stepped up.
She's my friend and she needed help.
If I had to, I'd pee on any one of you.
Only uh I couldn't.
I got to stage fright.
I wanted to help, but there was just too
much pressure. So So I uh I turned to
Chandler.
Joy kept screaming at me, "Do it now. Do
it. Do it. Do it now."
Sometimes late at night, I can still
hear the screaming.
That's cuz sometimes I just do it
through my wall to freak you out.
O,
what's with all this sand? Oh, yeah. Bob
said there might be sled damage. Either
that or he has a really big cat.
Well, is everybody else having just the
best time? Sh. Joy's asleep.
[Applause]
After he passed out, we put the sand
around him to keep him warm.
Well, I assume the uh happy couple isn't
up yet. Did you guys hear them last
night? Oh, yeah. I don't know what they
were doing, but at one point, sea
turtles actually came up to the house.
Good morning. Hi. Hey. How'd everybody
sleep? Oh, great. Like a lo. Us, too.
We're going for a walk.
Good morning. Nice breath, by the way.
[Laughter]
[Music]
Oh, isn't this nice? So quiet. I could
just lie here all day. Oh, no.
Open your drapes. Open your drapes. So
glad we got adjoining rooms.
The sun is out. Hey, remember when I had
corners?
Okay, listen. You go down to the pool
and reserve the chairs and I'll get the
magazines and the lotion. Uh, ladies,
Ross's speech is in 45 minutes. Damn it.
Walls are pretty thin, guys.
Then we have to weigh the data from
recent MRI scans and DNA testing
which call into question information
gathered from years of simple carbon
dating. Got that woman sitting out by
the pool getting tan material
all leathery and wrinkled. I'm so
jealous.
Finally, factor in the profusion of new
species recently discovered
Gigantosaurus.
Argentinosaurus,
not to mention Coldaurus.
And that's just the herbivores. I'm not
even going to discuss the carnivores.
Uh, their heads are already too big,
which is ironic considering their
stunted cerebral development.
[Laughter]
Really?
Okay. Come on. Daddy needs a new pair of
electromagnetic microscopes for the
prehistoric forensics department.
Okay. Take Pinky Tuscadero up to
inspiration point. Collect three cool
points. Yeah. Which gives me five. And
let's see who is going to lose their
clothes. Um I think I pick our strip
poker sponsor, Mr. Joey Tribani.
All right, relax. It's just a shoe.
Hey, your band is playing at Arnold's.
Collect three cool points, which means I
have five. And that means I get Joey's
boxers.
Fine, gang up on me. I got you all right
where I want you.
Come on, take them off. Actually, you
know, it's kind of cold, so how about I
keep my boxers on and give you all a
peek at the good stuff.
Yeah. How you doing?
Hey, hey, hey. You You said you were
going to wear a thong. Where's the
thong?
I didn't mean a thong. I meant thong.
You really should have been more clear
about that.
Hey, you're never going to guess who I
just saw downstairs. Oh. Uh, Britney
Spears.
Yeah, she never misses these
conferences. Now, I just saw Dr. Kenneth
Schwarz. Oh my god. I know. Did you talk
to him? Yeah. Um, what am I going to say
to Kenneth Schwarz? You could say, "Hey,
Kenny, how come you're not Britney
Spears?
You ready to go? You You going to go
now? I thought we could hang out. Oh, I
can't. I have seminars all day and I
promised Ross I'd look at a speech, but
um maybe we could have dinner later on
the balcony. It' be romantic.
Will you wear a thong?
I will if you will.
You got yourself a very weird deal.
I'm good. I I have dinner plans.
So, you going to be okay? Yeah. Yeah, I
got I got tons of stuff I could do. I'm
going to hit the beach, go swimming. Uh
Joe, have you looked outside?
No. Why?
Man,
there's an indoor pool. You You could
swim there. Yeah, I wasn't going to
swim. I was going to dig a hole.
Hey, what happened to you? Oh, uh
nothing. I just felt like hanging out
here and reading. The water was so
great. We jumped off this pier and my
suit came off.
Sorry I missed that. God, Joey and
Chandler sure are funny.
I think I brought back half the beach in
my hair. It was so much easier when I
used to shave my head.
You know, I got to tell you, I just
loved your look when you were bald.
Really?
Because I think about shaving it all off
again sometimes. Really? Yeah. I mean,
you definitely should do that.
You know what? I should do it. Yeah. You
know what? Thank you, Rachel. You are so
cool. Oh, stop. Cover.
Now, let's shave that head. All right.
[Music]
Hey, everybody. Wow.
[Laughter]
Look what you did.
You want to touch it? No, but but it's
great. Come on, touch it.
Okay.
You can feel all the bones in your
skull.
Oh, I'm sorry. I I think I think that
may have missed the table. Oh, do you?
Uh, y do you uh y do you uh y
you really find this attractive on him?
Oh, yeah. Are you telling me you're not
even a little turned on by Monica right
now?
I think this is the first time in our
marriage that I felt like the more
attractive one.
All right. Come on, Mike. You can beat
her. Knock that dog off her head.
Damn it. I sleep with him.
Game point. Don't get too cocky.
Remember, I won the last one. Oh, by the
way, how did that feel losing to a girl?
You know, you should really look in the
mirror before you call yourself that.
No, no, no. And that's how it's done.
Okie dokie. You've each won a game and
I've lost what's felt like a year of my
life.
So, everybody goes home a winner. Best
out of three. That's what I'm thinking.
Should I use my invisibility to fight
crime or for evil?
Serve the ball, chump.
Okay. Better comebacks, Mike. Better
comebacks.
[Music]
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