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Be honest with me.

Are you procrastinating on something right now?

Do you get distracted on the daily?

You are not alone.

We all suffer from procrastination and distraction.

Those are some of the very common ways

we sabotage ourselves

and keep us from doing the things that we want to do

from achieving the life that we want to live.

So let's talk about how to overcome this block.

How do we overcome our own selves

so that we stop procrastinating,

stop getting so distracted

in a world where everything is trying to distract us?

Hello my loves, welcome back to Lavendaire.

It's Aileen,

and welcome back to the Transform Your Life series.

So we've been doing the series for the past couple months,

helping us transform our lives in all the areas for 2025.

And today's episode is

on how to overcome the very common challenge

of being a procrastinator

and getting distracted all the time.

How do we make better use of our time and our attention

to efficiently and effectively achieve our goals

and to really become that person we wanna become?

Before we dive in,

I wanna let you know

that we have a free notion template worksheet

that goes along with this video

because I love making things interactive,

so you can actually do the exercises

and work along with the prompts I'll share in this video.

All right, so first,

why do we procrastinate and why do we get so distracted?

The first thing you have to know is

that procrastination doesn't mean laziness.

Just because you procrastinate,

it doesn't mean you're a lazy person.

Procrastination is the symptom

of an underlying fear or discomfort.

So you are running away from something.

Distraction can often be the catalyst to procrastination,

leading us to waste more and more time.

So distraction can be broken down to two causes:

internal triggers and external triggers.

Internal triggers are all the things within us

that fear, discomfort, that like uneasiness,

the don't wanna face it sort of feeling that causes us

to procrastinate even longer.

And external triggers for distraction are things

that are in our lives, whether it's a notification, a call,

an email, a text,

just anything in our environment

that can cause us to like focus on something else

other than what we want to focus on.

So then let's move on to how do we beat procrastination

and stop distraction.

So first step is to become aware of your internal triggers.

So you first have to understand what's going on

and what's stopping you from doing the thing,

because clearly you said you wanna do it,

you said this is your goal,

and yet you are not doing it.

You're procrastinating. You're running away from it.

So what is it that is so scary about that thing?

What is it that is so uncomfortable?

Really take time to reflect,

maybe journal or meditate on what it is

that is the internal trigger that makes you look elsewhere.

Maybe it's when you're faced with a task

or project that seems too hard, or too overwhelming,

that you just don't wanna start it

because it's just too much.

And whenever something seems too hard for you in your brain,

then you naturally pick up your phone and open social media.

In that case, it's not really the social media

that's distracting you,

it's your internal trigger of the fear and discomfort.

And so that's what you have to work on

if you wanna truly take control of your time.

Step two, shift your beliefs around discomfort.

So after you have identified exactly what beliefs

or internal triggers are affecting you,

then it is time to try to shift those beliefs.

So if you are always running away from things that are hard,

maybe you start working with the affirmation,

I am capable of doing hard things, I can do hard things.

Or you can shift it kind of like,

"This isn't hard. I can do that.

Like this is easy."

And then you break down the task in a way

to make it feel easy.

Other beliefs or affirmations you can try are

to look at it from a growth angle, right?

Discomfort means I'm growing

because growth happens outside of my comfort zone

and I love growing,

so I love feeling uncomfortable.

Or you can even start to ingrain the belief like,

"I thrive in discomfort.

I thrive in this uncomfortable zone

where I am growing and evolving

because I am proud of myself for growing and evolving."

Like there are so many different ways

that you can like frame these beliefs and affirmations,

but ultimately you wanna try to find a belief

that works with you,

like one that literally is the opposite

of what you're currently feeling or currently believing,

you wanna try to like flip the negative to the positive

so that you're ingraining

a more positive, supportive belief in your head.

Another way to work through your discomfort is

to find healthier coping strategies to ease that discomfort.

So, for example, if you're currently like running away

by going on social media

and you end up doom scrolling for three hours,

or maybe you are procrastinating

and so you look in the fridge

and you wanna like snack on whatever junk food you have,

certain coping strategies are not good for you.

They're not helping you. Right?

So find healthier coping strategies.

Like if I feel that discomfort,

I'm going to take 10 deep breaths.

And then I'm going to approach that problem or that task.

Or I'm going to go for a walk,

or I'm going to play some calming music.

Find a way that helps you

kind of like cope with that discomfort

because you know all it is is a feeling,

it's just an emotion or a belief, and it's not real.

Like you can work through it.

So find a way that you can take some action

and ease your discomfort

so that you can go back and face the task

that you are supposed to,

so that you don't turn to procrastination

and you don't turn to distraction.

Moving on, next tip is to reduce external triggers.

So now we're looking at everything in your life

and your environment that can distract you.

So whatever can distract you, try to eliminate or reduce it.

So this could be putting your phone on silent mode,

muting all notifications,

turning off a lot of notifications.

It could be putting up those like website blockers

so that you can't go on certain websites

or certain apps during this like focus time.

It could be like setting boundaries

with the people in your life,

like maybe if you live with certain people, you'd be like,

"Okay, from this time to this time, don't talk to me.

Don't bother me. I am busy, I'm unavailable."

It could also be making sure

that your environment is organized

and conducive to your focusing on your important work.

Like if you have a very cluttered environment,

maybe you might get distracted because you're like,

"Oh, I'm gonna do this."

"Oh, I forgot to open these boxes.'

Or, "Oh, I have to do this.

Oh, I'm gonna clean this."

So really set up your environment

and set up your life to make it

as easy and seamless as possible

to focus on what you want to focus on.

The next tip to help you stop procrastinating

and stop getting distracted is time blocking.

This is huge.

So what this means is

that you block out your time in your day

for the important things that you really, really want to do.

So you make the time and you commit to it.

You literally like schedule it in your calendar,

what time to what time are you focused on this exact project

or this exact task?

When you plan to do the task,

that makes it more likely that you do it, right?

Most of the time these tasks or projects are just floating

on a to-do list

and there's no like time we have to get to it.

And if there's no time you have to get to it,

then you're probably not going to get to it.

You're gonna find something else to like fill in that time.

So time blocking is simply making the time

and committing to it.

And this is also really helpful

for prioritizing your values in life

because you can time block not just like your important work

and your goals,

but also any value that matters to you in life.

Like time block your time with your family or your friends,

time block your self care.

This is the me time.

This is the time where I get to replenish

and nourish myself.

So time block anything that's important to you

that you wanna make sure you get done.

If it's not in the calendar, it's not going to happen.

So try it, time blocking.

The next tip is one of my favorites.

It's to break down your task into smaller and smaller steps.

This is something I talk about all the time

when I talk about productivity and procrastination

because really when we're procrastinating,

it's when a task feels too big, too hard,

too daunting, overwhelming.

And sometimes if you just break it down

into the smallest task,

like that feels so simple and so easy.

Open up a new web browser,

Google this one word, like type one word,

like just make it so easy.

Break down the task

into the smallest and smallest bits ever

to the point where you're like,

"Okay, I can do that one little thing."

And after you do that one little thing,

you find that it's easy to do the next thing,

and the next thing, and the next thing.

And you are really just snowballing this momentum

to make progress towards your goal.

And it's such a simple yet powerful concept

to just break it down,

start really small, take baby steps.

The goal here is to just get started.

Like an object in motion stays in motion, in physics.

So all you have to do is like do whatever you can

to like kick the ball, get it started,

jumpstart it however you can.

And once it's started,

then like movement will become easier and easier.

Like it'll be easier to tackle bigger and bigger tasks

once you've got something started.

Another tip for breaking down your task

and taking action on it is to use a focus timer.

So people talk about the Pomodoro Technique,

which is to set a 25-minute timer to focus on that task

and to just do that task and nothing else for 25 minutes.

After 25 minutes, you can take a break, or stop,

or do whatever you want,

but it's just having that focus time.

So if 25 minutes seems too long,

literally set a 5-minute timer.

Set like a timer for five minutes and say,

"Okay, in this five minutes, I'm going to take action."

And so see if you take action in that five minutes.

And once you take the action,

you'll find that it's easier to keep going.

And it's, you know,

I love giving myself tiny, tiny goals,

because it makes you feel good, right?

It's like, even if I just work on this for like 10 minutes,

that's all, that's good for today.

Like pat on the back, right? (laughing)

Because I need to like,

I need to basically reward myself

and give myself support as I'm taking these baby steps.

Otherwise, it just feels way too daunting

to tackle something really big.

So it's always good to start small,

especially if you're a beginner

and you tend to procrastinate a lot

and get distracted a lot, just start small.

While we're on the topic,

why don't you let me know in the comments down below,

what is the one next action

that you are going to take towards your goal?

Like I wanna know how small did you break it down?

I'm not gonna judge.

Like just let me know what is the one next action

that you are going to do today,

whether it's like a five-minute task

or like an hour task, whatever,

I wanna know, leave it down below.

All right, final tip I wanna share today is

to build trust with yourself.

So this is so crucial

because you have to start to keep the promises

that you make to yourself,

keep the pacts that you make with yourself.

What I mean by this is if you say you wanna do something

and you say you're going to do something,

follow through on it.

Don't make any promises that are bigger than you can keep.

Don't say, "I'm gonna run 10 miles today,"

if you're starting day one on this like fitness program.

No. Like say, "I'm gonna put on my running shoes."

That's it. (laughing)

"I'm gonna put on my running shoes

and walk for five minutes, and then see what happens."

Like set the pacts that you can keep with yourself.

The more that you follow through

on what you say you're going to do,

the more you keep these promises that you make to yourself

and you are watching yourself fulfill the promises

that you make to yourself,

the more you're gonna build a sense of self trust,

self belief, and then self confidence.

And then you can make bigger and bigger promises

and pacts with yourself.

Then you grow, right?

So don't be afraid to start small,

again going back to like make that pact or promise

as simple or as easy or as doable as you think you can.

Like don't over promise.

Like literally under promise over deliver, okay?

That's a lesson for yourself and with other people

because that way you build

a more positive perspective on yourself.

Like imagine if you always told yourself,

"Okay, I'm gonna do this, this, this, this, this,"

and then you don't do it.

The more you make these big promises

and you don't keep these promises,

you are watching yourself.

Like your brain is literally like,

"You're a liar. I don't believe you.

You're not gonna do it,

Like you said you would, but you never did.

So why would I believe you the next time you say it?"

So that's what happens to a lot of us

when we make these promises but we don't keep them.

We lose our sense of self-trust.

We lose our sense of self-belief,

and how disempowering that is.

So that's why this tip is so important,

like keep the promises you make to yourself.

Set pacts that you can keep.

And start small,

but keep building on them

because you can, you know, make them bigger and bigger

as you build that self trust.

But, yeah, I hope that that made sense.

I hope you like this video.

Let me know which tip was your favorite

and which one you are going to implement today.

I promise you that if you implement all of these tips,

you are going to be so much further along

in your focus game.

You are not gonna be as distracted.

You are not gonna procrastinate for as long anymore.

Like, yes, we are going to have our moments

where we fall off

and where we kind of still feel that discomfort.

It's never gonna go away.

Like if you're challenging yourself,

if you're doing new things, if you are growing,

there's always a level of discomfort.

So it's never gonna feel completely easy.

The thing is you are gonna be stronger.

So you can eventually take on bigger and bigger challenges.

I'm so excited for you.

Don't forget, we have that free notion template worksheet

that you can use to go through these exercises

and to really work on yourself

and to figure out how you can overcome those internal

and external triggers.

All right, sending you so much love.

I'll see you in the next video. Bye.

(bright music)

Please choose the correct answer for each question below: