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Okay. What is it about me? Do I not look
fun enough? Is there something repellent
about me?
>> So, how was the party?
>> Well, it couldn't have been worse. A
woman literally passed through me. Okay,
so what is it? Am I hideously
unattractive?
>> No, you are not. You are very
attractive. You know what? I go through
the exact same thing. Every time I put
on a little weight, I start questioning
everything.
>> Whoa. Whoa. I I I put on a little
weight.
>> Did you want
[laughter]
>> No, not weight. You know, more like
insulation.
>> Chandler, I'm unemployed in dire need of
a project. You want to work out? I can
remake you.
>> Oh, you know, I would, but that might
get in the way of my lying around time.
>> Please.
>> All right. Okay. All right. But if we
put on spandex and my boobs are bigger
than yours, I'm going home.
Your boobs are fine. Look, I never
should have said anything. Come here.
Come here.
>> Oh, can't make hands meet.
>> Okay, let's do it.
>> What?
>> Nothing. Just never seen your little
stretchy pants before.
And we're changing.
[laughter]
She's insane. The woman is insane. It's
before work. It's after work. It's
during work. She's got me doing butt
clenches at my desk.
And now they won't bring me my mail
anymore.
[laughter]
No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
>> Monica, it's Sunday morning. I'm not
running on a Sunday.
>> Why not?
>> BECAUSE IT'S SUNDAY.
It's God's day.
>> You say stop and we stop.
>> Okay, [laughter]
stop.
>> No. Come on. WE CAN'T STOP. COME ON. WE
GOT THREE more pounds to go. I am the
energy train and you are on board. Woo!
Woo! Woo!
Woo!
Woo!
>> Monica, [music] it's 6:30 in the
morning. We're not working out. It's
over.
>> No way. With one pound to go, come on.
We're working. We're moving. We're in
the zone. We're grooving.
>> Okay. I don't I don't mind the last
pound. Okay. In fact, I kind of like the
last pound. Okay. So, don't make me do
anything that I'll regret.
>> What you going to do, fat boy? Huh?
What? [laughter]
>> Nothing except tell you uh I think it's
wonderful how much energy you have.
>> Well, thanks.
>> I mean, especially considering how tough
it's been for you to find work.
You know, [laughter]
>> you know, I mean, you can't tell your
parents you were fired because they'd be
disappointed.
>> Uh-huh.
>> And it's not as if you have a
boyfriend's shoulder to cry on.
[cheering]
>> Well, no, but I
>> I mean, if it were me, I think I'd have
difficulty just getting out of bed at
all.
You know, I try to stay positive.
>> So, you you feel like going for a run.
[laughter]
>> All right.
>> Because you know, you don't have to. If
you want, you could just take a nap
right here.
>> Okay.
Just for a little while.
>> Okay.
[laughter]
>> [cheering]
>> tie my shoes. So, you go ahead. I'll
catch up. Okay. Okay.
>> Come on. LET'S START RUNNING. LET'S GO.
[laughter]
[music]
You guys, I'm telling you, when she
runs, she looks like a cross between
Kermit the Frog and the $6 million man.
[laughter]
>> Monica had such a crush on him that she
used to kiss his poster every night
before she went to bed.
>> Oh, I used to do that, too.
>> Did you also have his album? It's not
easy being green. [laughter]
>> Oh,
[laughter]
so Phoebe runs weird, huh?
Yeah. Yeah. You know what? And and I
know she's going to want to run again. I
just don't I don't know how to get out
of it. I mean, I live with her.
>> Why don't you just be straight with her?
Tell her the truth.
>> You're right.
>> You're right. I should just tell her the
truth.
>> Hey.
>> Hey.
>> Hey, Bab. Monica tripped me. I don't
think I can ever run again. Ever.
[laughter]
>> Why? Why would you do that?
>> I don't know. [laughter]
>> Rachel, I'm I'm sorry that I hurt your
ankles. Ankle. We'll see.
>> Oh, yeah. Uhhuh. It's me. I saw you grab
your running shoes this morning and
sneak out. You lied so you could run by
yourself.
>> No. No, Phoebe. No, I was No, you know
what? I was I was actually just checking
to see if I could run, and I can.
>> Please, Rachel. I am not an idiot. NO,
>> WAIT, PHOEBE.
>> [music]
>> HEY, PHOEI. Can I talk to you for a
second? Sure. Okay. Um, I
[laughter]
Phoebe, look, I just wanted to say that
I'm sorry. Okay. I handled the situation
horribly and and I should not have lied
to you.
>> So, what should you have done?
>> Well, I I should have told you the
truth.
>> Uhhuh. which is
well, [laughter]
you know, the reason that I didn't want
to go running with you is because um
well, you know, the way that you run is
just a little
[laughter]
>> So, well, it's embarrassing. People were
looking at us like we were crazy.
>> Why do you care? Because they're people.
But people that you don't know and will
never see again.
>> Yes, but still they are people with
eyes.
>> [laughter]
>> Well, I didn't get embarrassed running
next to Miss.
[laughter]
>> But Oh, okay. No, no, I can see why
running with me would be embarrassing to
you. Yeah. Okay. You're uptight.
>> What? I But I am not up.
Listen, I am not uptight, man.
[laughter]
>> That's okay, Rachel. I'm not judging
you. That's just who you are. me, I'm
more freak, you know? I run like I did
when I was a kid because it's the only
way it's fun, you know? I mean, didn't
you ever run so fast you thought your
legs were going to fall off, you know?
Like when you were like running toward
the swings or or running away from
Satan,
[laughter]
the neighbor's dog.
>> [laughter]
>> I'm so sorry. You're right. This feels
great.
>> See, and you don't care if people are
staring. It's just for a second CUZ THEN
YOU'RE GONE.
>> GOD, I MEAN, IT'S AMAZING. I FEEL SO
FREE AND SO GRACEFUL.
[laughter]
HEY, look out for the horse. [laughter]
>> You want to play rough? We can play
rough.
>> Let's get ready to rock.
[music]
Y'all ready for this?
>> [music]
[music]
>> Get her. Get her. Get her.
>> I love this game.
>> [cheering and applause]
>> You know, Rachel, funny thing actually,
uh, the end zone starts at that pole, so
you're five feet short. So,
We win. [cheering]
>> Wait, wait, wait, wait. So, explain
something to me, though. If if nobody
tagged Rachel, then isn't the place
still going?
[music]
Kathy. Kathy. Hi, Kathy. Kathy.
>> [music]
>> Cy
got
Gabby
moving.
Cathy.
>> Hey, Chandler. What are you doing here?
>> Well,
I just want to say hey.
>> Hey.
>> Okay.
>> I'm out.
>> I'll play you.
>> Okay. Mike, you don't you don't know
what you're doing.
>> She gets crazy. This scar is from
Pictionary. [laughter]
>> I think I'll be all right. You want to
volley a bit for sir?
>> Sure. Go to
>> Oh.
>> Oh, by the way, um I'm awesome.
>> Oh, dear God, there's two of them.
You ready to play?
>> Hell yeah.
>> Did you know this about him?
>> No idea. I I thought he was soft like
you.
>> You want to make it more interesting?
>> How much were you thinking?
>> 10 bucks a game.
>> Make it 50.
>> I'll make it a 100.
>> 1,000.
>> Okay.
>> Let's see who goes first. Uh, you got a
quarter?
>> No. Either you girls got a quarter.
[laughter]
>> Honey, try to focus the trash talk on
him.
Monica, you call it. Heads. No tails.
Not heads. Tails.
>> Oh, what are the chances? [laughter]
>> Ha. My point.
>> Oh, no. I don't think so. No. According
to standard table tennis rules, if at
any time a player uses his non-rackcket
bearing hand to touch the playing
surface, he or she forfeits the point.
[laughter]
>> Oh, I'm sorry. I I think I think that
may have missed the table. Oh, do you?
>> Uh, y
>> do you?
>> Uh, y
>> do you?
>> Uh, yeah.
>> You really find this attractive on him?
>> Oh, yeah. Are you telling me you're not
even a little turned on by Monica right
now?
[laughter]
>> I think this is the first time in our
marriage that I felt like the more
attractive one. [laughter]
>> All right. Come on, Mike. You can beat
her. Knock that dog off her head.
Damn it. I SLEEP WITH HIM.
[cheering]
>> Game point.
>> Don't get too cocky. Remember, I won the
last one. Oh, by the way, how did that
feel losing to a girl?
>> You know, you should really look in the
mirror before you call yourself that.
>> No, no, no.
>> And that's how it's done.
>> Okie dokie. You've each won a game and
I've lost what's felt like a year of my
life.
>> So, everybody goes home a winner.
>> Best out of three.
>> That's what I'm thinking.
>> Should I use my invisibility to fight
crime or for evil?
>> Serve the ball, chump.
>> Give up, champ.
>> Okay. Better comebacks, Mike. Better
comebacks.
>> I can't just walk away. I I put in 4
hours. But look, you knew this about me
when you married me. You agreed to take
me in sickness and in health. Well, this
is my sickness.
>> What about the obsessive cleaning?
>> That's just good sense. [laughter]
[laughter]
>> You okay?
>> No, no, no, honey. I'm okay. I shake it
off. Oh god. No shaking. No shaking. No
shaking. [laughter]
Oh my god. I can't play.
>> So, you forfeit.
>> Mike wins.
I can't believe it.
I lost.
>> No, you didn't.
>> What?
>> Because I'm going to play for you.
>> You can't do that.
>> Ah, it's okay. I don't care which of
them I beat. [laughter]
>> Okay, we're taking that pedal home,
mister.
>> [laughter]
>> Hey, you don't have to do this.
>> Yes, I do. Now, I may not understand why
you have to win so badly, but if it's
important to you, then it's important to
me because I love you.
>> But you suck.
[laughter]
>> You're welcome, sweetheart.
>> All right, Mike. Let's get this over
with. Sudden death. Whoever wins this
point wins. Okay.
Oh my god, you're good. It's like
[applause] watching porn.
[laughter]
>> And that's how it's done. [laughter]
[cheering]
>> Oh my god. Oh my god. That was so
[applause] amazing.
When did you Hold on. I almost forgot.
LOSER.
>> [laughter]
>> WHEN DID YOU stop sucking?
>> I never sucked. I just didn't want you
to know how good I was.
>> Why?
>> I don't know.
>> Well, this is so great. Now we can enter
into doubles tournaments.
>> That's why.
>> Hey. Hey.
>> So, uh, Estelle, line up a bunch of
auditions for me tomorrow and I'll have
my health insurance back in no time.
[laughter]
That's great. But shouldn't you be on a
toilet right now?
[laughter]
>> What? What's wrong with you? Nothing.
Well, I I I got this blinding pain in my
stomach when I was lifting weights
before and then I uh passed out and uh
haven't been able to stand up since. But
uh I don't think it's anything serious.
>> This sounds like a hernia. You have to
you go to the doctor.
>> No way. Hey, look. If I'm going to go to
the doctor for anything, it's going to
be for this thing sticking out of my
stomach.
That's a hernia. I have to start working
out again.
Damn you 15s.
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