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Gasp
What's wrong?
Nothing
Why did you gasp?
So you couldn't
Deep Inhale I have an emergency!
Do you really?
I think so
What have we said about the term emergency?
That I can't overuse it
or one day Sugar will be on fire
and you won't believe me.
Except, I really don't see a scenerio
where that happens
and it wasn't your fault.
OK, what's the emergency?
Eric wants to get coffee.
You have two more strikes
and then you've officially lost
all credibility
Oh, come on!
How is my ex-boyfriend
wanting to get coffee
not an emergency?
Is he in danger?
Are you in danger?
Yes!
I'm in danger...
of cheastin'
OH!
Coffee is a code word for sex!
Ew!
For who?
For you,
otherwise, how is it cheating?
Um
because he's my ex-boyfriend
and he wants us to hang out alone
in a public place
so not alone
Also
I would be furious if Davis
got coffee with his ex-girlfriend
There it is!
You're a jealous maniac
so you assume everyone else is too
Do you not remember what Sam Levine
our camera operator
from Freaks and Geeks said?
Cheating is doing anything that would make you uncomfortable
if your partner did it.
OK, well. I think the Sam Levine
from Freaks and Geeks
was assuming that you were a normal person.
Most people wouldn't care about a little coffee
between friends that used to bone.
gasp Oh my god!
I cheated on Davis.
I totally forgot to tell him
that a guy hit on me
at a party last week.
You went to a party?
Yeah, by mistake.
And I completely forgot to mention it
because I passed out the moment I came home
I was already like
10:45!
Does Davis make you report these instances?
No, but I ask him to keep a log
of every interaction he has
with any girl or gay man,
so it's only fair that I do the same.
Wow, I thought it was hard
being your friend,
but this guy's a hero.
I'm a reasonable person gabby.
I don't make him write down
interactions with blondes
because I know he finds them
boring to look at.
Hey!
Has he ever seen photos of me
with purple hair?
No, nevermind
I want to be able to keep texting
him behind your back.
You guys text behind my back?
Here's the thing.
Despite his taste in women,
Davis seems to be a pretty normal,
confident, stable guy.
I doubt that he'll care
if you get coffee with your
ex-boyfriend.
He won't?
No, I don't think so.
But what if he wants to have coffee
with his ex-girlfriend?
You have to let him.
No!
Yes!
Look, people are gonna do
what they wanna do anyway.
It's better to trust someone,
and then get blindsided by betrayal
than monitor their every move
so that they have to like,
waste money on hotel rooms
and a second phone.
Is that supposed to make me feel better?
Sure!
You have months of tranquility
until one of you inevitably fucks up.
sigh I mean,
I do trust him,
and I don't want to be a jealous maniac.
OK, so you go get coffee with Eric,
and he can finally catch up with Ashley-
How do you know his ex-girlfriend's name?
We text a lot behind your back.
Oh relax, it's like a support group
for people who know you.
OK, that does not make me feel better!
Eric just invited me
to be his plus one
at his brother's wedding.
But that's OK, right?
Because we'd just be going as friends?
Sure!
You're not the right person to ask.
I'm not the right person to ask.
I CAN'T STOP gasp
GASPING gasp
OH MY gasp
GOD gasp
IT'S gasp
exhale
That's really tiring.
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