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- Warning: Only watch this if you wanna conquer the world.
What up, everyone?
It's your girl, Superwoman.
If you've never seen any of my videos, hi,
my name is Lilly and I suck at a lot of things.
I can't multiply and that includes reproducing,
because I'm a horrible girlfriend.
I don't know how to be sexy.
No, for real, I can't even turn my iPod on by touching it.
I'm horrible at spelling.
When I used to write essays for school,
I would title them the Red Squiggly Line:
One Girl's Story about Bad Spilling.
But I'm pretty damn good at one thing
and that's getting ish done.
I recently released my movie, a Trip to Unicorn Island.
After watching it, a lot of people messaged me,
and called me, and was like, "I am so inspired
"to work harder in my life" and that made me really happy,
so I decided to make this video.
If you're watching one of my videos for the first time,
AKA this video, it's probably because someone sent it to you
because they think you should do some damn work,
or maybe you were just randomly going through social media
and you found this video, in which case,
you weren't doing any damn work to begin with.
Either way, I'm about to tell you five real ways
to get work done.
I say real ways, because these aren't gonna be cute,
adorable, Tumblresque ways.
No, they're gonna be real ways that might not be so fun.
Consider this the f'ing Buckley's of work guidelines.
Tastes terrible, but it works.
Also, sidenote: You shouldn't be tasting
or eating these guidelines.
Number one: Say it outloud.
Work can be overwhelming.
Sometimes you have 1 day to do 50 things
and your brain doesn't know how to handle it.
You get stressed.
If you're anything like me, this is how your brain works.
Okay, I need to check 50 emails.
I need to reply to those ten urgent emails.
I need to edit that video as well.
Oh my god, I think I have that essay due tomorrow.
I have to pay my credit card bill.
Have to buy a birthday present for my sister.
I have to wash my hair.
You know, I better take a nap.
Now, here's how you get over that overwhelming sensation.
It's simple, but it works.
Whenever I have a crapload of things to do,
I literally look like a deer in the headlights, just like:
You might be able to relate.
The key is to stop doing that and instead make a plan
and say it outloud.
Something super simple, like, okay, really,
this is what's gonna happen.
You're gonna shut up.
This is what's gonna happen.
You are gonna take a deep breath and then you're gonna go
to these meetings, you're gonna come back home,
you're gonna edit this video, you're gonna respond
to these emails, and then you're gonna go to bed,
and before you go to bed, you're gonna be like,
oh my god, I did it.
That was wonderful.
I knew I could do it.
That is what you're gonna do and you will do nothing else.
Here we go.
A few key points for this to work though:
First, you need to be stern with yourself.
This is not a greeting card to yourself from yourself.
I don't wanna hear no, hey, I know you're tired,
but you know I really want you to get this done.
That would be really nice, because dreams are made of roses.
There's only one person that can actually put you in check
and that is you, okay?
Dreams aren't made of roses.
Dreams are made of your potential.
Lay the smackdown on yourself and let you know
who's boss and that's you.
Second, within the statement, you need
to give yourself a starting action,
like how I said you're gonna take a deep breath, then.
It's kind of like the gunshot at the beginning of the race.
It tells you that, hey, this is the key to start.
This is what we're gonna do.
This means things are starting.
Or else you might just make a gameplan
then just never do it.
This could be a clap, it could be a jump,
it could be a stretch, it could be a booty pop,
whatever ya want.
Third, make sure you say this plan outloud.
It's not to be said in your brain.
Your brain is already filled with stupid memes
and hot people that you shouldn't be thinking about.
There's no more room for thoughts up in there.
There's something about hearing your plan outloud
that makes it very real and makes you understand it.
Fourth, you have to end with a concluding statement,
like how I said, before you sleep,
you're gonna think about all the things you did
and feel awesomesauce.
I don't think that's exactly what I said,
but something along those lines,
because that's positive reinforcement for yourself.
At the end of the night, when you actually review
all of things you did and realize that it worked,
that will encourage you to do it again tomorrow.
It's like the dessert after all the vegetables.
Number two, have two to do lists.
Have two to do lists (laughing).
Two chains, I dunno, that's where my brain went.
Everyone says they're working, but I believe 1%
of people are actually working.
The other 99% of people are just making to do lists.
To do lists are great, unless you're doing them wrong,
in which case, they're totally pointless.
Some people out here treat to do lists
like they're vision boards, like f'ing bucket lists,
like f'ing life goals.
Tell me if you can relate.
Have you ever made a to do list that looks like this?
Finish essay, read chapters one through five,
buy new jacket, respond to all emails in inbox,
clean room, find true love, grow hair so I can
do that cute braid, learn to play chess, get sixpack.
If that's what your to do list looks like,
you, my friend, need to calm the eff down, okay?
Because Post-its aren't genies.
They don't make wishes come true.
Aladin took place in Agrabah, not f'ing Office Depot.
I know, I know, when you're making a to do list,
it's so tempting to think you're invincible
and you're gonna do all this stuff today.
You been writing your to do list and it looks
like the effing lyrics to Rihanna and Drake's new song,
just like work, work, work, work.
Just be real.
I find the key is to have two to do lists.
One for things you're gonna do today, AKA before you sleep,
and one for longer term goals.
Example: Today, read chapter one.
Longer term goal: Read chapters one through five.
If you want, you can even have a third list,
called LOL, where you write things like find true love.
Number three: Don't cross off accomplishments.
This also has to do with to do lists.
To do lists, why is that so hard to say?
I feel like when people finish something
on their to do list, they either cross it off or erase it
and I don't think that's the right thing to do.
I think it's important to visually see all the things
you accomplished in a day,
so you don't feel like a useless turd.
Instead of crossing things off,
literally take items and move them onto a list, titled Done.
That way, before you sleep, you see how many things
you accomplished, all the things you might have forgotten.
You can think, hey, I was really productive today
or holy crap, I'm a complete failure.
It's all about perspective.
Can I just say that I do this and it's helped a lot
and this is literally the only use for a white board.
I know we like to convince ourselves
that buying a whiteboard makes us productive
and really, we just never use them.
I have 20 white boards; never use them.
Absolutely useless, except for this, a done list.
Start fresh every morning.
Also, a great alternative use,
if you wanna end a relationship,
just write your significant other's name on the done list.
(laughing) Don't do that, ya jerk.
Number four: Get out the friend zone.
No, I'm not taking to you, Bob,
Bob who's cute, that is every girl's bro,
because he's so adorable,
but he can't ever get that booty, Bob.
It's not about you.
I feel for you, Bob, but it's not about you.
This is for people who wanna actually succeed in life.
I'm sure this is not the first time you've heard this,
but it is significantly easier to get work done
when you're surrounded by like-minded people.
In fact, that is almost half of the reason I moved to LA,
but this is not about me; this is about you.
That doesn't mean you gotta move to another country.
I mean, you can if you want to, but you don't got to.
I mean, if you're in LA, hit me up.
If you're lucky, the people who hustle
and motivate you are your friends.
But can I be honest?
They're likely not.
I bet your friends are so great
at holding your hair back while you puke,
at eating pizza with you, at gossiping with you,
taking ugly selfies with you, hanging out with you,
watching movies with you.
Great, do all that stuff with them,
but if they're not great at working with you,
why are you with them when you're trying to get work done?
You need to find people to work with
that work harder than you.
When you're in a room with them, you feel guilty,
because they're working so hard and you're like
holy crap, I need to get my ish together.
If that's not your friends, then so be it.
That means it's okay to say, "Hey, no,
"you can't come over, because I have work to do."
Different people work in different situations.
Number five: Kill distractions.
We always say things like, "Man, I get distracted.
"People keep calling me, people keep texting me
"and I can't concentrate,"
acting like our phone controls us.
No, you're getting distracted
because you are allowing yourself to get distracted.
I do this all the time and I just taught myself now,
when I need to get work done, it's not like I have Facebook,
Twitter, and all that stuff open and I just ignore it.
No, I actually close all of those tabs
so I can't even see them up in my peripherals.
You need to be self aware.
Being productive and focusing on something doesn't mean
ignoring the ping on your phone.
It means put yourself in a position
where you can't even hear the ping on your phone,
because you know your brain is gonna cave
and you're gonna wanna know who texted you.
Put that ish on silent, put it in another room,
and get your work done.
Close Facebook, close Twitter, close YouTube--
I mean, you ain't gotta close YouTube if you don't want to.
Help your brain focus.
I mean, it's the least you could do after all those shots
of tequila and stabbing it with a Q-tip.
Hey, I hope you enjoyed that video.
Now listen, here is what we are gonna do.
I am going to edit this video,
then I'm going to release this video.
If you like it, give it a thumbs up,
comment below, letting me know if it was helpful.
You can check out my video right there, my last video.
My blogs are over there.
You should subscribe, because I make new videos
every Monday and Thursday, but if you have work to do,
don't listen to anything I said.
Ignore it all, because when I clap and this video's done,
you are gonna get to work and share this video
with people who also need to hear it.
Let's conquer the world.
One love, Superwoman, that is a rap,
and (clapping) let's get to work.
I've met thousands of people and every single time
I felt like this is not a stranger.
This is someone I've known forever.

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