– English Lyrics

Lyrics & Translation

[English]

hey hey how'd the run go oh pretty good

I finished that's great why is that

great because they accomplished

something

what was your mild time about seven I

could beat that on a skateboard well

that has wheels yeah well my feet don't

and I could still crush that time really

Dwight not faster you let's just put it

this way

last weekend I outran a black pepper

snake really I am fast to give you a

reference point I'm somewhere between a

snake and a mongoose and a panther man

what is shaking Toby so long oh I'll

just time him later and you'll compare

the times yeah are you ready no have I

being mean to Dwight I don't know I did

just make him run around the building

and I have no intention of timing him

this isn't even a stopwatch it's a

digital thermometer he does make my life

harder sometimes and on purpose like he

tried to put meters on the bathroom

stalls as a way of bringing in more

money for the company hey three more

laps to go

you gotta pick it up you're gonna beat

Toby I should probably get back to work

[Music]

[Laughter]

seriously okay okay yes I have a wig for

every single person in the office you

never know when you're gonna need to

bear a passing resemblance to someone I

just want it to stop

here we go college Roadshow gotta bring

our a-game what is the most inspiring

thing I ever said to you don't be an

idiot

changed my life whenever I'm about to do

something I think would an idiot do that

and if they would I do not do that thing

oh man is that a prism duro sport you've

seen one of these yeah they're like an

iPod only they're better because they're

chunkier and more solid Roy gave it to

me for Christmas I'm trying to figure

out how to put songs on it oh no no no

don't go there

I know this Russian website you can

download songs for two cents apiece

really yeah I'll write down the address

for you only the only thing is is that

all the songs are in Russian kidding why

would the AL beat okay see you later Pan

yeah me a cup of coffee me too or do you

also have a monopoly on thirst okay guys

it didn't work out for any of us so

we're still on the same team let me get

these no let him get his own he's got

suruc use money you know your partner's

got a lot of attitude but I like that

how long you guys been dating Jim

couldn't land me in a thousand years but

you're saying there's a chance

Cumberland Mills and how did you get my

resume oh no no I'm very flattered don't

get me wrong I'm just not sure that it's

my official resume or if it's something

that maybe a satisfied customer posted

online what does it say under martial

arts training oh okay I'm gonna have to

supplement that could I have your fax

number would I ever leave this company

look I'm all about loyalty in fact I

feel like part of what I'm gonna be paid

for here is my loyalty but if there were

somewhere else that valued that loyalty

more highly I'm going wherever they

value loyalty the most honor of oh oh

what is on your face is that a disguise

clown paint ID badges are long overdue

security in this office park is a joke

last year I came to work with my spud

gun in a duffel bag I set up my desk all

day with a rifle that shoots potatoes at

60 pounds per square inch can you

imagine if I was deranged he are going

to do everything humanly possible to

ensure that this never happens again

well it doesn't help because it already

happened to the watermark it's a

one-time thing I don't care it was

disgusting it a cartoon characters

having sex then I point out that the sex

appeared to be consensual both animals

were smiling okay I grew up on a farm I

have seen animals having sex in every

position imaginable go down chicken

chicken on goat a couple of chickens

doing a goat a couple of pigs watching

whoever drew this got it exactly right

what did I do

I did my job I slashed benefits to the

bone I saved this company money was I

too harsh maybe I don't believe in

coddling people and the wild there is no

health care in the wild health care is

ow

I hurt my leg I can't run a lion eats me

and I'm dead well I'm not dead I'm the

lion you're dead

just hit me you'll see I can't cuz just

got a manicure so oh cool yeah i queer I

that's a good show important show go

ahead do it just have to I punch you

Yoshi well that would be kind of

worthless because I know a ton of

fourteen-year-old girls are gonna kick

is it I know a ton of fourteen-year-old

girls what belt are they look Dwight is

a wuss when we rented Armageddon no

right at the end of it Michael I told

you that was because it was New Year's

Eve and it started to snow at exactly

midnight punt you oh okay here we go

oh did I want to harm Michael but one

man I've been hired to protect No

I did not okay all right thank you I

come from a long line of fighters my

maternal grandfather was the toughest

guy I ever knew World War two veteran

killed 20 men then spent the rest of the

war in an allied prison camp my father

battled blood pressure and obesity all

his life different kind of fight as a

volunteer sheriff's deputy I've been

doing surveillance for years one time I

suspected an ex-girlfriend of mine of

cheating on me so I tailed her for six

nights straight turns out she was with a

couple of guys actually so mystery

solved let's go over some of these

symptoms of marijuana use shall we you

tell me who this sounds like slow-moving

inattentive dull constantly snacking

shows a lack of motivation I like the

people I work with generally with four

exceptions but someone committed a crime

and I did not become a Lackawanna County

volunteer sheriff's deputy to make

friends and by the way I haven't okay I

will only need two things a roll of duct

tape and a knife I'm on it okay 30

minutes relax please come back save the

receipts hey what hey wait wait

I keep various weaponry strategically

placed around the office I saved Jim's

life with a can of pepper spray

I had velcroed under my desk people say

oh it's dangerous to keep weapons in the

home or the workplace well I say it's

better to be hurt by someone you know

accidentally than by a stranger on

purpose

what you're saying is extremely

misogynistic yes thank you that was not

necessary but I appreciated it and

proves my point women can do anything

I'm saying that you're being sexist

no I'm being misogynistic that is insane

I'm not being sexist that's much the

same thing yes when I got my haircut

chart you asked me if I was a lesbian

because wow that was one possible

explanation as to why you got that

haircut and when we get mad you always

ask us a form in our periods I have to

know whether you're serious or not I

wish I could men straight if I could men

straight I wouldn't have to deal with

idiotic calendars anymore

I'll just be able to count down from my

previous cycle plus I'd be more in tune

with the moon and the tides

[Music]

you

Key Vocabulary

Vocabulary	Meanings
accomplished /əˈkɒmplɪʃt/ B2	verb - to achieve or complete successfully.
skateboard /ˈskeɪtbɔːrd/ A2	noun - a board with wheels attached to the bottom, used for riding.
crush /krʌʃ/ B1	verb - to defeat or overcome easily.
reference /ˈrefərəns/ B1	noun - a point or standard in relation to which things may be compared or assessed.
mongoose /ˈmʌŋɡuːs/ B2	noun - a small, carnivorous mammal known for fighting snakes.
intention /ɪnˈtenʃən/ B2	noun - a thing intended; an aim or plan.
thermometer /θɜːˈmɒmɪtər/ A2	noun - an instrument for measuring temperature.
stall /stɔːl/ A2	noun - a compartment or enclosed space.
laps /læps/ A2	noun - a circuit around a race track or similar course.
wig /wɪɡ/ A2	noun - a covering for the head made of real or synthetic hair.
resemblance /rɪˈzembləns/ B2	noun - the state of looking similar or alike.
inspiring /ɪnˈspaɪərɪŋ/ B2	adjective - giving one the courage or hope to do something.
idiot /ˈɪdiət/ A2	noun - a foolish or stupid person.
prism /ˈprɪzəm/ B2	noun - a transparent optical element used to refract or disperse light.
chunkier /ˈtʃʌŋkiər/ B1	adjective - more solid or substantial in form.
download /ˈdaʊnloʊd/ B1	verb - to copy data from one computer to another.
monopoly /məˈnɒpəli/ B2	noun - exclusive control of a commodity or service in a particular market.
loyalty /ˈlɔɪəlti/ B2	noun - faithfulness or devotion to a person, cause, or country.
deranged /dɪˈreɪndʒd/ C1	adjective - affected by mental illness or insanity.