– English Lyrics

Lyrics & Translation

[English]

there's nothing to tell it's just some

guy i work with

come on you're going out with the guy

there's got to be something wrong with

him

so does he have a hump a humpband a

hairpiece

wait does he eat chalk

just cause i don't want her to go

through what i went through with carl um

okay everybody relax

this is not even a date it's just two

people going out to dinner and not

having sex sounds like a date to me

[Music]

all right so i'm back in high school i'm

standing in the middle of the cafeteria

and i realize i am totally

naked

then i look down and i realize there is

a phone

there

instead of that's right

i never had that

all of a sudden the phone starts to ring

and it turns out it's my mother

which is very very weird because

she never calls me

[Music]

this guy says hello i want to kill

myself

are you okay sweetie i just feel like

someone reached down my throat grabbed

my small intestine pulled it out of my

mouth and tied it around my neck cookie

carol moved your stuff out today oh

let me get you some coffee thanks

oh

no oh no no don't stop cleansing my

aura don't just leave my aura alone okay

i'll be fine all right really everyone i

hope she'll be very happy no you don't

no i don't to hell with her she left me

and you never knew she was a lesbian

no okay

why does everyone keep fixating on that

she didn't know how should i know

sometimes i wish i was a lesbian

did i say that out loud

all right ross look

you're feeling a lot of pain right now

you're angry

you're hurting

can i tell you what the answer is

strip joints

come on you're single have some hormones

but i don't want to be single okay i

just i just i just want to be married

again

and i just want a million dollars

rachel

oh god monica hi thank god i just went

to your building and you weren't there

and then this guy with a big hammer said

that you might be here and you are you

are can i get you some coffee decaf

okay everybody this is rachel and

another lincoln high survivor this is

everybody this is chandler and phoebe

and joey and you remember my brother

ross sure

so you want to tell us now or are we

waiting for four wet bridesmaids

oh god well

it started about a half hour before the

wedding i was in this room where we were

keeping all the presents

and i was looking at this gravy boat

this really gorgeous lamos gravy boat

when all of a sudden sweet and low i

realized

i realized that i was more turned on by

this gravy both than by barry

and i got really freaked out and that's

when it hit me how much berry looks like

mr potato head

you know i mean i always know he looked

familiar but

anyway

i just had to get out of there and i

started wondering why am i doing this

and who am i doing this for

so anyway i just didn't know where to go

and i know that you and i have kind of

drifted apart but

you're the only person i knew who lived

here in a city who wasn't invited to the

wedding oh i was kind of hoping that

wouldn't be an issue

[Music]

you

Key Vocabulary

Vocabulary	Meanings
cafeteria /kæfəˈtɪəriə/ B2	noun - a room or building where people eat meals, typically in a school or workplace
intestine /ɪnˈtɛstɪn/ C1	noun - the part of the digestive system that absorbs nutrients
lesbian /ˈlɛzbɪən/ C1	noun - a woman who is romantically or sexually attracted to other women
hormones /ˈhɔːrməʊnz/ C1	noun - chemical substances produced by glands that regulate physiological activities
gravy /ˈɡreɪvi/ B1	noun - a sauce made from meat juices
survivor /sərˈvaɪvər/ B2	noun - a person who continues to live or exist after an event
fixating /ˈfɪksteɪtɪŋ/ C1	verb - to focus one's attention obsessively
cleansing /ˈklɛnzɪŋ/ C1	noun - the act of making something clean
aura /ˈɔːr.ə/ C1	noun - the distinctive atmosphere or quality that seems to surround a person
hammer /ˈhæmə/ B1	noun - a tool with a heavy head used for pounding
decaf /diːˈkæf/ B2	noun - coffee with most of its caffeine removed
hairpiece /ˈhɛəˌpiːs/ C1	noun - an artificial covering for hair
hump /hʌmp/ B1	noun - a rounded protuberance on a surface
chalk /tʃɔːk/ B1	noun - a soft white limestone used for writing
strip /strɪp/ B2	verb - to remove clothing or covering
single /ˈsɪŋɡəl/ A2	adjective - not married or in a relationship
married /ˈmærɪd/ A2	adjective - joined in marriage
million /ˈmɪljən/ A2	noun - one thousand thousand