– English Lyrics

Lyrics & Translation

[English]

listen uh you want to go get a drink or

something yeah

if oh what's wrong I just remembered I

have to do something oh what

um leave oh wait wait wait wait

[Laughter]

[Applause]

I'm helping out down at the NYU med

school with some uh research what kind

of

research uh just you know

science

science yeah I think I've heard of

that it's a fertility

study

Joey please tell me you're only donating

your time

all right come on you guys it's not that

big a deal really I mean I just go down

there every other day and make my

contribution to the

project hey hey but at the end of two

weeks I get

$700 wow oh you're going to be making

money hand over

fif

happy no I uh just thought I'd throw

this out here I'm no math whz but I do

believe there are three girls and three

guys right here

mhm I don't feel like kissing anyone

tonight I can't kiss anyone so I'm

kissing everyone no no no you can't kiss

Ross that's your brother oh yeah perfect

perfect so now everybody's going to kiss

but me all right somebody kiss me

somebody kiss me it's midnight somebody

kiss me somebody kiss me it's midnight

it's one

[Music]

what nothing nothing just Your Overcoat

sounds remarkably like Brent musberger

check it out Giants

Cowboys you're watching a football game

at a funeral no it's the pregame I'm

going to watch it at the

reception you are a frightening

frightening

man what the matter with you

oh what you were supposed to be in there

so I could see your

thing sorry my my thing was in there

with

me hey Joey what's going on clear the

tracks for the booby payback Express

next stop Rachel

Green Joey what the hell are you doing

so sorry wrong

boobies Joey

peponi oh still too ethnic my agent

thinks I should have a name that's more

neutral Joey

[Laughter]

Switzerland plus you know I think it

should be Joe you know Joey makes me

sound like I'm know this big which I'm

not Joe Joe Joe Stalin

Stalin Stalin do I know that name that

sounds familiar well it does not ring a

bell with

me Joe

Stalin you know that's pretty

good you might want to try

[Applause]

Joseph Joseph Stalin

I think you'd remember that oh

yes bye-bye birdie starring Joseph

Stalin Joseph Stalin is the Fiddler on

the

[Music]

Roof you know there already is a Joseph

[Laughter]

Stalin you're

kidding apparently he was this Russian

dictator who slaughtered all these

people you'd think you would have known

that you know you'd think I would

have kiddo you're going to be fine

believe

me uhoh

[Applause]

uh I'll just pee in the

street hey hey

hey and this from the cry for Health

Department are you wearing

makeup this I am as of today I am

officially Joey triani actor/model thank

you that's so funny cuz I was thinking

you look more like Joey triani man/woman

what were you modeling for oh you know

those posters for the city free clinic

oh wow so you're going to be one of

those healthy healthy healthy guys you

know the asthma guy is really

cute you know which one you're going to

be no but I hear lime disease is open so

you

know good luck man I hope you get it

thanks well you were right how can they

do this to us huh it's

Thanksgiving okay I tell you what how

about if I cook dinner at my place I'll

make it just like Mom

will you make the mashed potatoes with

the

lumps you know they're not actually

supposed to I'll work on the

lumps Joey you're going home right yeah

and I assume Chandler you're still

boycotting all the pilgrim

holidays yes every single one of

them and B you're going to be with your

grandma Yeah and and her boyfriend but

we're celebrating Thanksgiving in

December cuz he's

lunar BR he's doing it again

Marcel stop humping the land stop

humping now Marcel come come back come

here Marcel no no no not in my room I'll

get him Ross you've got to do something

about the humping what it's it's just a

phase well that's what we said about

Joey so how'd it go it was amazing you

know how you always think you're great

in bed the fact that you'd even ask that

question shows how little you know

me well it's like last night I I

couldn't do the thing that usually makes

me great so I had to do all this other

stuff and the response I got man oh man

was like a ticker tape

parade yes I know as it happens my room

is very very close to the parade

route it was amazing and not just for

her huh for me too it's like all of a

sudden I'm blind but all all my other

senses are heightened you know it's like

I was able to appreciate it on another

level I didn't know you had another

level oh

my

God hey it's bris

[Music]

okay I'm making a break for it I'm going

out the window no no no don't please

look I've been waiting for like forever

to go out with line just calm down calm

down calm down you set me up with a

woman I've dumped twice in the last 5

months

hey can you stop yelling you're making

me nervous

[Laughter]

and I can't go when I'm

nervous I'm sorry I'm sorry you're right

come on do it do it come

on

hey

Ur what are you doing here I've been

trying to call

you listen um oh no no no don't say

listen I know that listen I've said that

listen I'm sorry I don't get it what

happened what what about everything you

said under the

bridge yeah

um you know you should just forget about

what I said under the bridge I was

talking crazy that night I was so

drunk you don't drink that's right I

don't but I was I was drunk on

you Earth but okay yeah so it's not

going to work why is it because I'm

friends with

Phoebe if it was would you stop hanging

out with

her no no I I couldn't do that um then

yeah it's cuz of Phoebe

oh so you know it's either her or

me then uh then I'm

sorry you

know you're going to be really really

hard to get over I know

I don't know whether it's just cuz we're

breaking up or what but you have never

looked so

beautiful really

[Music]

thieves

yeah you pick one just pick one here how

about that one that's patio

furniture for what like people are going

to come in and think uhoh I'm outside

again

on what about the

birds I don't know Birds just don't say

hello sit here eat

something you pick one all right how

about the ladybugs oh so forget about

the birds but big red insects suggest

fine diamonds fine you want to get the

birds get the birds not like that I

won't Kip would have lik the birds

hi this guy says hello I want to kill

myself look you're feeling a lot of pain

right now you're angry you're hurting

can I tell you what the answer is strip

joints come on you're single have some

hormones see but I don't want to be

single okay I just I just I just want to

be married

again uh you know what

forget about me let's uh let's give you

another

turn me again sure why

not boy somebody's going to get a big

fruit basket

tomorrow oh I got to tell you Joey you

are nothing like I thought you would

be how do you mean

I don't know I I guess I just had you

pegged as one of those guys who are

always me me me but

you you're a

giver you're like the most generous man

I ever met I mean you're practically a

[Music]

woman hey

kicky what are you doing just trying to

get comfortable

can't sleep in my underwear well you're

going

to I've been thinking you know about how

I'm always seeing girls on top of

girls are they end to endend or tall

like

pancakes you know what I mean about how

I'm always going out with all these

women cuz I always figured when the

right one comes along I'll be able to be

a standup guy and Go the Distance you

know I'm looking at my dad thinking hey

you're not him you're

you when they were all over you to go

into your father's pipe fitting business

did you cave no no you decided to go

into the outof work actor

business and that wasn't easy but you

did

it and I'd like to believe that when the

right woman comes along you will have

the courage and the guts to say no

thanks I'm married

[Applause]

you really think so yeah I really do

thanks C get

off this is so unfair oh why is it so I

have a flaw big deal like Joey's

constant knuckle cracking isn't annoying

and Ross with his over pronouncing every

single word and Monica with that snort

when she laughs I mean what the hell is

that

thing I accept all those FL why can't

you accept me for

this does the knuckle cracking bother

everybody

well I I could live without

it was it like a little Annoying or is

it like when Phoebe chews her

head oh now don't listen to him fees all

right I think it's endearing oh you do

do

you hi Sandy Sandy hi come on

in you brought your kids yeah that's

okay right

you know when I saw you at the store

last week it was probably the first time

I ever mentally undressed an

Al wow that's uh

dirty

yeah hey kids

[Music]

Key Vocabulary

Vocabulary	Meanings
fertility /fərˈtɪlɪti/ B1	noun - the quality or state of being fertile; the ability to produce offspring
contribution /kənˈtrɪbjuːʃən/ A2	noun - a gift or payment to a common fund or collection
frightening /ˈfraɪtənɪŋ/ A2	adjective - causing fear or anxiety
research /rɪˈsɜːrtʃ/ A2	noun - the systematic investigation into and study of materials and sources verb - to investigate systematically
donating /ˈdoʊneɪtɪŋ/ A2	verb - to give something, especially money, for a good cause
kissing /ˈkɪsɪŋ/ A1	verb - to touch or caress with the lips as a sign of affection
midnight /ˈmɪdˌnaɪt/ A1	noun - 12 o'clock at night
parade /pəˈreɪd/ A2	noun - a public procession, especially one celebrating a special event
appreciate /əˈpriːʃieɪt/ A2	verb - to recognize the full worth of
lunar /ˈluːnər/ B1	adjective - relating to the moon
humping /ˈhʌmpɪŋ/ B2	verb - to engage in sexual activity, often used informally or humorously
generous /ˈdʒɛnərəs/ A2	adjective - showing a readiness to give more of something, especially money, than is strictly necessary
endearing /ɛnˈdɪərɪŋ/ B1	adjective - inspiring love or affection
annoying /əˈnɔɪɪŋ/ A2	adjective - causing irritation or annoyance
flaw /flɔː/ A2	noun - a mark or defect in something