– English Lyrics

Lyrics & Translation

[English]

I need a favor um I was in the shower

and as I was cleansing myself I uh I I

well I felt something was it like a

sneeze only

better no no I mean I mean like a thing

on my body what was it well I I don't

know it's it's kind of in a place that's

not it's not visually accessible to me

and I was hoping maybe you guys could

could help me out no

come on you guys no big deal just

die

huh what is it is it a

mole no it's too wrinkly to be a mole ew

is it what a

pimple no it's fancier than a

pimple look Ross why don't you just go

see a

okay well it's definite two more weeks a

winter right I've got three of my five

three of your five what celebrities I'm

allowed to sleep with oh my God you are

giving us a lot of thought hey it's hard

okay I only have two spots left all

right who you got in Nan to

okay Elizabeth Hurley very attractive

yeah

forgiving Susan San

you know what she's too political she

probably wouldn't let you do it unless

you donated four cans of food

first and Isabella rosolini very hot

very sexy but uh you know she's too

International you know she's never going

to be around so so you got to play the

odds pick somebody who's going to be in

the country like all the

time yeah cuz that's why you won't get

Isabella rosellini GI

graphy for once I'm going to sit down

and try to watch one of these

things half

time hey who wants to uh throw the ball

around a little maybe get a little three

on three going oh that would be so much

fun oh can I play too I've never played

football like

ever great you can cover

Chandler no no I don't I don't really

want to play come on man you haven't

want to do anything since you and Janice

broke up that's not true I want want to

wear my bathrobe and eat peanut clusters

all day I wanted to start drinking in

the morning don't say that I don't have

ghouls CH you have to start getting over

her all right if you play you get some

fresh air maybe you'll take your mind

off Janice and if you don't play

everyone will be mad at you cuz the

teams won't be even come

on all right I'll play Yay let's do it

Ross what want to play

football um Monica and I aren't supposed

to play

football says who your

mom

yes well every Thanksgiving um we used

to have a touch football game called the

the Geller ball no no no you say that

proudly anyway Ross and I were always

captains and um it got kind of

competitive and one year Gill ball six I

accidentally broke Ross's nose

it was so not an accident she saw I was

about to tag her so she threw a big fat

grandma arm elbow in my face just kept

running to score the winning touchdown

by the way who ho ho ho uh you did not

win the game the touchdown didn't count

because of the spectacularly illegal oh

and by the way Savage nose

breaking I won the game oh yeah then how

come you didn't get the Galler cup

there was a Geller

cup yes it was the trophy you got if you

won the game but our dad said nobody won

that game and it was sick of our

fighting so we took the

trophy threw it in the

lake and was the curse

lifted

anyway that's when Mom said we were not

allowed to play football again you know

what I think we should play a game I

mean come on it's been 12 years can I

see you for a

second what all right we're going to

play well wait a minute though how are

we going to get there because my mom

won't let me cross the street that was

supposed to be like a private personal

thing between us okay Ross Phoebe is my

girlfriend okay we tell each other

everything you know I mean come on guys

do the same thing I mean what about that

locker room stuff that's different okay

that's like uh who dated a stripper or

who did it on the back of the Stanten

Island

Ferry both of those Joey

yeah but you don't you don't talk about

like you know your girlfriend and the

intimate stuff you you do with her not

even with your best friend no that is so

sad you're missing out on so much Ross I

mean the bonding and the share in you

know and and knowing that someone else

is going through the same thing you are

H so what you tell each other

everything pretty

much did you talk about the night of

five

[Music]

times do you tell people about the night

of five times H honey yeah that was with

Carol I know but it's still worth

mentioning I think you know when you

want to go to sleep you want some space

so uh you know how do I tell her that

without you know accidentally calling

her fat or

something oh honey I'm sorry we can't

help you there cuz we're cuddly

sleepers okay I'm late for work oh all

right are you guys going to come down uh

yeah yeah I'll I'm right behind you okay

good luck Chandler thank you Rachel bye

sweetie bye

honey okay the sleeping

thing very tricky business but there is

something you can do I thought you guys

were cuddly sleepy

no no not cuddly not me just her I'm

like you I need the

room okay come

here okay you're in bed

yeah I'm going to use the cushion

yeah okay you're in bed she is over on

your side cuddling now you wait for her

to drift off and then you hug her and

roll her over to her side of the

bed and then

you roll

away hug for

her roll for

you okay the old hug roll y okay one

question shoot you're pretending the

pillow's a girl

right got a job on a

riverbat you know what I didn't wear the

suit for a year because you hated it

well guess what you're not my girlfriend

anymore so oh I see so this suit is

making a point now that you're on your

own you're free to look as stupid as

you'd

like you like it right oh absolutely I

like it even more on you than I did on

carinal Sanders Ross Ross I'm kidding

come here what what were you going to

tell us yeah oh was it how you invented

the cotton chin okay

goodbye what about you I

mean there any fun you know fantasy type

things

no come on you got to have

one

nope Ross you know what what what if you

tell me I might do

it

okay um did you ever see um Return of

the

Jedi

yeah do you remember this with

um Jaba the

Hut well Jaba had as as his prisoner um

Princess

[Music]

Leia Princess Leia was wearing this um

gold bikini

thing it was pretty

cool the other night

Rachel and I are in bed talking about

fantasies and I happen to describe a

particular Star Wars thing princess

laying the gold bikini

yes yes well wow well that that was easy

okay you you go okay okay okay well you

know you know when you're in bed with a

woman and

uh you know you're ring around with her

and you get all these like mental images

in your brain you know like El mcferson

or that girl at the Xerox place with the

belly button right oh I know and then

all of a sudden your mom pops into your

head and you're like Mom get out of

here you know but of course like after

that you can't possibly think of

anything else and you can't you know

stop what you're doing so it's kind of

like

you're you know you know you I don't

know

Mom you're tell you're telling me about

about your mom what is the matter with

you you share I said share not scare go

sit over

[Music]

[Music]

there okay here we go I am job's

prisoner

and you have a really weird look on your

face what what is it did I get it wrong

did I get the hair wrong wa did you just

picture it differently what what no no

no it's um it's not you it's um

it's well what is it come on sweetie you

kind of like freaking me out

here the hate Chandler the bastard

ruined my life

Dr Bobby happens to be an excellent

doctor oh wait a minute his name is Dr

Bobby well that's his last name and his

first name he's Bobby

Bobby it's Robert

Bobby and um excuse me he helps me

please ask her how what do you need help

for with my alignment I got one leg

shorter than the other oh my God argue

with that what it's true my right leg is

2 in shorter come on you're just

tilting her legs are fine I know that so

what do you let her go to a chiropractor

for I'm sorry let her what can I do she

doesn't listen to me about uh about

renters insurance either wait a minute

you don't have renters

insurance

no but what if somebody steals something

how you going to run after him with one

leg short than the other

hey would you uh would you like some

juice I love some juice

okay wow this is going so well did you

see us did you see yeah honey I'm

standing right

there why don't you just tell him about

the mall I haven't gotten checked yet

excellent you want to play rough we can

play

rough get ready

[Applause]

[Music]

y'all ready for this

[Music]

[Music]

her get her get

[Music]

her I love this game but I told you on

the phone I don't have time to stop okay

you don't have to stop I'm invisible I'm

not here yeah but I

don't who approved that order well there

is no Mark Robinson in this office get

me Mark on the phone oh I love Mark do

you know Mark

yeah well let me just check that with

what I've got here all right see 038 is

not the number for this store 038 is

Atlanta

pepper none for

me I'm sorry as I was saying the store

number is wrong and I'm sorry but that

is oh my

god

oh okay

oh yeah oh yeah excuse me I'm sorry I'm

going to have to call you back I've got

shm in my

office what are you doing I'm sorry but

um hey oh somebody's off the phone how

about a glass of wine by the fire I can

get it going again if do you realize

this is the first time in my life I'm

doing something I actually care about

this is the first time in my life I'm

doing something that I'm actually good

at I mean if you don't get that no hey I

get that okay I get that big time and

I'm happy for you but I'm tired of

having a relationship with your

answering machine okay I don't know what

to do anymore well neither do

I is this about

Mark oh my God okay it's not oh my God I

cannot keep having the same fight over

and over again Ross no you you're you're

making this too hard oh I'm I'm making

this too hard okay what do you want me

to do I don't know I don't know look

maybe we should just take a break okay

okay fine you're right let's uh let's

take a break let's cool off okay let's

get some frozen yogurt or

something

no a break from

us I made a mistake okay a mistake what

were you trying to put it in her

purse where where did he put it

[Applause]

you had sex with another woman oh my god

oh I knew something had to be wrong

because my fingernails did not grow at

all

yesterday yeah well I guess they had a

fight and he got drunk you guys knew

about this you didn't tell us he has sex

and we get hit in our

heads you know what I want you to leave

get out of here just get out now no I no

I want to stay I want to talk about this

okay all right

how was she

uhoh what was she good don't answer

that come on she said you wanted to talk

about it let's talk about it how was

she she was awful she was not good not

good nothing compared to

you she she was different oh

uhoh good different

nobody likes

change should we do something yeah never

cheat on

Rachel I'm sorry okay I'm sorry I I was

disgusted with myself and this morning I

was so I was I was so upset and then I

got your message and I was so happy and

all I wanted was to get her out of my

apartment as fast as possible whoa whoa

whoa wait a minute

what time did your little friend

leave oh my God she was there she was

still there she was in there when I was

in

there oh

just listen oh hey hey the important

thing is she meant she meant nothing to

me and yet she was worth jeopardizing

our

relationship look I didn't think there

was a relationship to jeopardize I

thought we were broken up we were on a

break that for all I knew could last

forever that to me is a breakup you

think you're going to get out of this on

a technicality I'm not trying to get out

of anything okay I thought our

relationship was dead well you sure had

a hell of a time at a

wake you know what I don't think we

should listen to this anymore what what

are you doing you can't go out there why

not I'm

hungry because they'll know we've been

listening God i' have to hear about it

from guner come on like I wanted him to

tell you I ran all over the place trying

to make sure that didn't

happen oh that is so

sweet I think I'm falling in love with

you all over

again you know what I think we can go

out there I mean they have more

important things to worry about yeah

we'll be fine look Rachel I wanted to

tell you I thought I should I I did and

then Chandler and Jo convinced me not to

wax the door shut we're never leaving up

here's my boy here's my boy and here's

his

[Music]

Barbie what's uh what's my boy doing

with the

Barbie he picked it out of the toy store

himself he loves it he carries it

everywhere it's like a security blanket

but with ski boots and a kiky beret

yeah it's it's it's cute why why why

does he have it again so it's got a doll

so

what unless you're afraid he's going to

grow up to be in Show Business this

wouldn't have anything to do with the

fact he's been raised by two women would

it you know what it's fine if you're

okay with the Barbie thing so am I give

Daddy the Barbie give give me the Barbie

okay how about don't you want to play

with a monster

truck no okay o o how about a dino

Soldier a tournament on my

new dart board huh huh what do you think

huh two days of darts it'll be

great that'll be great for next weekend

no no no this weekend guys it'll be

great for next

weekend I mean it'll be great

what's going on we were um sort of

invited to go skiing you know Rachel's

sister's

cabin yeah that's okay me if you guys

all have to go away for the first

weekend I'm alone by myself you know

then totally totally

understand you know what I can stay I'm

going to stay cuz the last time I went

skiing I was too afraid to jump off the

chairlift I just went round and round

thieves we kind of need you to drive

everybody up there in your grandmother's

Cal but you know what I'll stay no I'll

stay he's my brother what a Pity stay

no F going to have fun we can make

fudge pity

food you know what that's okay all right

I don't need any of you to stay okay

nobody stays well then I might as well

offer to stay

on behalf of the brown birds of America

I salute

you just a minute CH you have no

backhand excuse me little one I have a

very solid backhand shielding your face

and shrieking like a girl is not a

backhand I was

shrieking like a

marine all right here watch me execute

the three PS of championship play

Power

Precision and

panach you broke a little girl's

leg no I feel horrible okay it says here

that a muppet got whacked on Sesame

Street last

night where exactly were you around

Kish we ran out of gas and we don't know

where we are so we can't get a tow truck

oh now you want a favor yes please well

uh I'm sorry your car broke down fees

but I'm a little too busy with some of

my real friends right now but please

call to let me know you got home safely

okay B hang on a

second here take my car go pick up your

friends no I'm not going to pick them up

we both know you're going to do it cuz

you're not a jerk okay so you can either

silk here for half an hour and then go

pick them up or you can save us both

time and silk in the car oh Rachel

doesn't want I am sorry that Rachel

dumped you cuz she fell in love with

that Mark guy and you were the innocent

victim in all of this but don't punish

your friends for what Rachel did to

you yeah you're right tepi hang on a

second R want to tell you something what

you slept with someone

else we were on a break okay we were we

were yeah where are you I'll find you

you slept with another woman oh you're

you're one to

talk the cat's ready all right let's go

you're welcome oh I'm sorry were you

speaking to me or sleeping with someone

else we were on a break you know Ross

why don't you just put that on your

answering machine hey hey it's valid

okay and I'm not the only one who thinks

so Monica agrees with me

what I don't

know that's what you said last night

what I said was was that I

understood Joey is the one who agreed

with you

okay really

Joey

what you know what but there there is no

right or wrong here no I think it's very

obvious who's wrong here obviously not

to

Joey

what joy and do the same way that I

do guess who I am

[Applause]

look what you're doing a

Chandler GI Joe GI Joe hey I don't know

what to tell you guys that's the doll he

chose what'd you do dip it in

Sugar look GI Joe's in Barbie's out and

if you guys can't de with it that's just

you're too

bad what are you being such a weenie for

he's a Barbie big deal you used to dress

up like a

woman

what well you used to dress up in Mom's

clothes all the time what are you

talking about the big hat the pearls the

little pink handbag okay you are totally

making this up how can you not remember

you made us call you be

[Music]

oh

god I've literally never been this

happy wasn't there a little song oh

please God let there be a song there was

there was no song there was no song I am

okay I drink okay that's that's enough

you won't

you won't

you won't you dance around with me don't

rush into anything yeah come on think

about it you're 18 okay she's

44 when you're 36 she's going to be

[Music]

88 but you don't think I know

that the point

is there's a lot of women out there you

haven't even had sex with yet yeah he's

he's right he's right this is your time

you know yeah you're young you're you're

weird dig

that okay but isn't sex better when it's

with one person that you really really

care about yeah in a poem

maybe no the man's right that's what I

had with Rachel you don't have it

anymore no I

uh I slept with someone else okay so

wait all right so how did that make

things

better it

didn't okay so what you used to have

with Rachel is what I got without Alice

now what what what is that like it's so

cool man it's so it's just cuz being

with her is so much better than like not

being with

it why can't I find that don't ask me I

had and I blew it well I want it you can

have it I don't know maybe I can I mean

maybe there's something wrong with me no

it's out there man I've seen it I got

it then you hold on to it all right man

all right congratulations lucky B you're

Frank's best

man I couldn't help it their love is so

pure well what about you huh I'm the

ring

bearer would you just stay and help me

get

dressed sure

okay okay great um okay just turn around

what I don't want you to see me naked

Rachel I've seen you naked a million

times I eat hot fudge off your naked I I

suck that mini marshmallow out of your

belly

button yeah but that was different you

know I mean we were we were going out

then I it's it's weird ra you know I can

see you naked anytime I

want

what all I have to do is close my eyes

see

woohoo stop that

I'm on aren you thinking of me like that

anymore uh sorry nothing you can do

about it it's one of my uh rights as the

ex-boyfriend huh oh oh

yeah cut it out cut it out okay okay I'm

sorry it will never happen uhoh wait a

minute wait wait now there are a hundred

of you and I'm the

king you got to stop okay you can't just

stare through the peephole for 3

hours you're going to get peie

I knew it I knew it I always knew she

liked him you know she'd say no but here

we are right we just broke up first

thing she does you didn't just break up

yeah You' spend like 3 weeks you slept

with somebody 3 hours after you thought

you broke up I mean bullets have left

guns

slower here they come here they oh if

she kisses him good night I'm going to

kill myself I swear I can't I can't

watch come on date over date over oh oh

here we go she's going in okay she's

going in wa he's going

in he's going in the door's closed I I

can't see anything but the door closed

and the inventor of the door rests

happily in his

grave okay I have to do something I mean

I have to I have to stop it stop what I

don't know but the I I have a feeling

that my being there will do it I'll go

over and I will borrow something juice I

need no

you it must be stopped I am your friend

and I am not going to let you do this

you are surprisingly

strong I need juice people need juice

look man people need juice list to me

they

[Laughter]

[Applause]

need she's moving on okay if it's not

this guy it's going to be somebody else

and unless you're thinking about

subletting my peoplee you are going to

have to get to the fact that the

relationship is over okay man it's

over yeah

okay okay it's just I miss her so

much I

know it's from the woman at the

bar sorry she thought you were somebody

else

what time is it 1 1

7:15 watch doesn't

work Tommy's supposed to be here soon

we're going to

lunch look look I wasn't going to say

anything to you but all right I don't

think you should be seeing Tommy

anymore you don't no the guy is mean I

mean really mean I think you should stay

away from him hm or maybe I should stay

away from all men no it's not just

because I'm

jealous I mean I'm not I'm not I'm not

jealous okay it's look the guy he

screamed he actually screamed at this

couple sitting in our seats yeah and at

the end of the play he he got up you

know and he just started like banging

his hands together

hi you uh wanted to see me

yeah uh here's a box of your

stuff what uh you know it's just like

hats and shirt and CDs just sort of

stuff that you've left here what are you

doing are you are you trying to hurt me

or

something

no

Ross it just seems that you know it's

time we you know move on I mean don't

you think

yes yeah yes I do yeah I I I really

do

hey this this was a gift Ross you got

that for free from the museum gift shop

it's still a gift I got it from the gift

shop okay all right give me the mug I'll

keep the mug no you know you know don't

do me any favors in fact where

where's the rest of my stuff huh like

like my um hey this book is

mine and and and and that t-shirt you

sleep in I'd like that back too yes I

do you know how much I love that t-shirt

you never even wear that t-shirt I'm

just trying to help you move

on oh you are a petty man you are a

petty petty petty petty

[Laughter]

small you are so just doing this out of

spite no no no I'm I'm going to wear

this all the time I love this

shirt you have not worn that t-shirt

since you were 15 it doesn't even fit

you anymore oh yeah yeah yeah

yeah okay okay

if you don't mind I'm going to take the

rest of my

stuff and

relax in my favorite

shirt you have a pleasant evening

[Music]

Key Vocabulary

Vocabulary	Meanings
cleansing ˈkliːnsɪŋ B2	verb - to clean or purify something, especially the body noun - the act of cleaning; a process of purification
mole moʊl B1	noun - a small, dark spot on the skin
wrinkly ˈrɪŋkli B1	adjective - having many small folds or lines; creased
celebrity səˈlebrɪti B2	noun - a famous or well‑known person, especially in entertainment or sport
political pəˈlɪtɪkəl B2	adjective - relating to government, public affairs, or the governance of a country
donate ˈdoʊneɪt B1	verb - to give something, especially money or goods, to a cause or organization
international ˌɪntɚˈnæʃənəl B2	adjective - involving more than one nation; worldwide
odds ɑdz B1	noun - the chance that something will happen; probability
competitive kəmˈpɛtɪtɪv B2	adjective - relating to or characterized by competition
touchdown ˈtʌtʃˌdaʊn B2	noun - in American football, the act of carrying the ball into the opponent’s end zone for a score
illegal ɪˈliːgəl B1	adjective - not allowed by law; unlawful
trophy ˈtrɑːfi B1	noun - a cup or other object awarded for victory in a competition
curse kɜːrs B2	noun - a spoken or written wish for misfortune to befall someone verb - to invoke a curse on someone
intimate ˈɪntɪmət C1	adjective - very personal or private; closely acquainted
fantasy ˈfæntəsi B2	noun - a mental image of something unreal or imagined
bikini bɪˈkiːni B1	noun - a two‑piece women's swimsuit
relationship rɪˈleɪʃənʃɪp B1	noun - the way in which two or more people or things are connected
breakup ˈbreɪkˌʌp B1	noun - the end of a romantic relationship
jeopardize ˈdʒɛpərˌdaɪz C1	verb - to put something at risk of loss, harm, or failure

Key Grammar Structures

• I need a favor um I was in the shower and as I was cleansing myself I uh I I well I felt something was it like a sneeze only better

  ➔ Use of discourse markers ('um', 'uh', 'well') to indicate hesitation and thought process. Complex sentence structure with embedded clauses.

  ➔ The sentence demonstrates natural, spoken language with frequent pauses and self-correction. The embedded clauses (e.g., 'as I was cleansing myself') add detail and complexity.

• Ross what want to play football um Monica and I aren't supposed to play football says who your mom

  ➔ Ellipsis (omission of 'do' in 'what want to play'). Tag question ('says who?'). Indirect question.

  ➔ The sentence uses informal language and grammatical shortcuts common in casual conversation. The ellipsis and tag question create a conversational tone.

• you're giving us a lot of thought hey it's hard okay I only have two spots left

  ➔ Contraction ('you're'). Use of interjection ('hey'). Use of 'okay' as a discourse marker.

  ➔ The sentence demonstrates a casual and conversational style. The contractions and interjections contribute to the informal tone.

• you know what she's too political she probably wouldn't let you do it unless you donated four cans of food first

  ➔ Use of 'you know what' as a discourse marker. Conditional sentence (first conditional: 'wouldn't let' + 'unless').

  ➔ The sentence uses colloquial language and a conditional structure to express a hypothetical situation and its requirement.