– Bilingual Lyrics Chinese/English

Lyrics & Translation

[English]

Grandma

Grandma wake up

Wake up, there is porridge, there is porridge

Grandma, why don't you eat it

Child

Eat it by yourself

Your grandma is dead

Mr. Liu

It seems that what the victims said about Zhou Factory withholding food aid

is completely true

The boss of Zhou Factory has come and there is no subordinate

Shut up to Mr. Liu during the interrogation

Mr. Liu Liu

Have you done anything wrong?

I asked you where the relief food you allocated is.

It’s all in the storehouse

Xianguan specially sent 8 brothers to guard it

I’m asking about the Zhou Governor

The relief grains sent to Zhouchang every day are all in the pot

Humph

knock knock knock

Stop

Shen Shi

The official is standing by the pot

You should keep your eyes open

Let me ask you

Did the Yamen Secretary of the Ministry of Revenue tell you?

The law of Zhouchang losing town

told

how to say

The lost town must be checked later

Do you see the chopsticks inserted

No

you can

Is this already porridge

Let alone the chopsticks

I can't even get a few grains of rice out

Such a pot of watery soup

You let the hungry people eat it

Is this life-saving porridge?

Is it still considered the emperor's grace?

Can it be considered my parents and officials?

Mr. Liu

There is more people but less rice

If the grasshoppers were all in the later Zhou Dynasty

The factory wouldn't be able to run this week

I, Shen Shi, am also sharing the worries of the imperial court, shut up

You saw it just now

Those victims were all starved to death

Mr. Liu

I

I, Shen Shi, am really sharing the worries of the imperial court

The rice relief allocated by the imperial court

If all I produce are the next week

Within three days

This week's show will be over

Are you worthy of the court?

Are you worthy of the victims who are holding bowls

Wanting to survive

Say it

Say it

Mr. Liu

I will go and carry the rice

This will cook a pot of thick porridge that can hold chopsticks

Too late

Too late

Too late is

What does it mean

Law of the Qing Dynasty

Porridge factory lost porridge

Chopsticks floated

What did the head fall to the ground

Chopsticks raised it

The head fell to the ground

Right

He lifted up with chopsticks

The head fell to the ground

This is the person coming from the king of Huanggang

In

Please show the king's order flag

Lord Liu

Do you really want to kill me?

Really kill you

Hahahahahahaha

Mr. Liu, are you trying to practice my courage, Shen Shi?

Under the flag of Wang Ming

How can this be a child's play

Master Liu

I, Shen Shi, and the brothers are all wronged

It's wrong

No one is spared

ma ma ma

Master Liu

Can you allow me, Shen Shi, to see my old mother again?

Execution is imminent

I'm afraid you won't be able to see me

No

My old mother is in Zhouchang

Mother, mother, father, mother

Mother is here

Here is

Mother, mother, mother

Here is

Mother

Mother

Mother

Mother

My son is unfilial

My son is unfilial

I let God hold a bowl at the porridge factory to drink porridge

No, no, no

Yes

You have fulfilled your filial piety

You are your mother's filial son

Didn't you just say that?

From today

Add more rice to the porridge pot

You must cook the porridge for your mother to eat

With this sentence

you will fulfill your filial piety to your mother

I'm sorry

My dear mother asked her to drink clear water porridge

Ah

Hahaha

oh

Son

Mother

Dear

Mother

I bit off my own flesh today

I’m so rich for you

Mother

Ah

Ah mother

To be honest

Niu Niu

You shouldn't let your guilty son go

Mr. Liu

This is the key to the grain warehouse

Please open it

21 lives

Did I kill the wrong person

Is there really nothing that Shen Shi can do

Cook thick porridge for the victims

But where did

the relief grains allocated by the imperial court go?

Could it be that

not all of the relief grains were transported to Zhouchang?

Mr. Miao,

If you don’t tell me what kind of tree this is

I really don’t know

This tree with abundant grains is a wonderful thing

Yes

Yes hahaha

Mencius said

Hundreds of millions of grains

Sell by count

Bind these grains to a tree with a book

Let them prosper and coexist together

Use the trees to flourish

Promote the prosperity of the five grains

Is this a sign of a rich and powerful country

Yes, yes, hahaha

The ancients said

The five grains are for nourishment

In view of the humble position

If it is to nourish the people

It cannot be supported by the five grains

Er, if it is to nourish the country

It cannot be treated by the five grains

The emperor will hold a grand ceremony in a few days

Hey, Mr. Miao presents this grain technique to the emperor

It will definitely increase auspiciousness

To please the emperor's heart

Ah hahaha

Look

this grain tree

seems to be planted with ears of grain

In fact, it is to the hearts of all people

Ah, let’s see if it looks like a Wanmin Umbrella

Ah

Hahaha

Like like like like

Mr. Zhang, Minister of the Ministry of Revenue, is here hahaha

Mr. Zhang please

Please please please

Mr. Pan, the Governor of Water Transport, is here

Oops, hahaha

Oh, Lord Miao

Oh, it's so gratifying

I won, hahaha

Oh my god, hahaha

Oh, Lord Han

Your information is really well-informed

There is a little movement in my Miao Mansion

I can't hide it from you even if I want to

Oops

I also got the news from Lord Tian Wenjing

Oh hahaha

Oh, what a big grain tree

Lord Tian

How did he know

I planted this grain tree for the new emperor

Lord Miao

You underestimated Tian

When Lord Tian moved the errands for the late emperor

That's a lot of things

The late emperor hasn't heard yet

But Lord Tian

has heard about it

Since Lord Tian already knows

Why not invite him to have a sneak peek

Oh Lord Tian

Although the person has not arrived

but the words

still arrived

Mr. Tian asked Tan

Let me ask you first

Are the grain ears tied on this grain tree

are the ears left from the Yongzheng period?

Oh, there is no need to say

Haha, these grains were planted by the late emperor Gangmu

That’s good hahaha

Lord Tian said

As long as it is the grain ears left by Emperor Yongzheng

...

This grain tree is planted

It is an auspicious tree

Hahahahahahaha

Kowtow to see

Hall Minister Mi Rucheng

Lord Mi arrives

Hall Supervisor Wang Liansheng

Lord Wang arrives

Report to Master Mi

Cangchang Governor Miao Zhongshu

Master Miao is in the Taipingcang at this time

If Master Mi wants to enter the warehouse

Wait until the official goes to report

Is that so

Master Miao is also here

It has been two hours since Master Miao arrived

Why didn't I see Master Miao's sedan?

Master Miao came alone

The door is open

Master Mi can't go in.

So what if you go in

So what if you don't enter

Lord Miao has an order

Anyone who enters will be beheaded

Anyone who enters will be beheaded

What does it mean

Master Miao is in the cabin

The case of yellow grain adulteration must be investigated

No one is allowed to enter the cabin to interfere

Hahahaha

Good

Master Miao personally goes to the warehouse to catch the borers

Naturally, our granary in the Qing Dynasty can be kept safe

Qiwan Ancang

Master Mi, please wait

Master Miao has just been to Wancang

The disadvantages of Wang Liang's broken armor

Taiping and Wan'an warehouses are the most prosperous

Could it be that Master Miao has intercepted something in Wan'an warehouse

I don't know the details

That's okay

Since Master Miao personally inspected the warehouse

I, Mi, am relieved

Please Wang Liansheng report back to Lord Miao

Just say that Mi Rucheng has resigned temporarily

Is there any news recently

Lord Miao is saying

The emperor gave birth to Li Ru yesterday and became the governor of Cang Cang

Well

How

It's getting bigger and bigger

Hahaha

Just because it's windy, it doesn't mean it's going to rain

But there is one thing that I, Miao, have identified with him

The day Mi Rucheng was promoted

is when I, Miao Zongshu, was transferred

Why

am I scared

Hahaha

Lord Miao

You can't leave

This piece of fat meat

We can't leave it to the wild dogs

In order for our brothers to have a good firewood to burn

This green hill in the granary

I, Miao, have reserved it

With these words of Mr. Miao

Our old buddies also took some peace of mind.

Maru Oh Hahaha

But Mr. Miao

The newly appointed Minister of Justice Liu Tongxun is right

He has an extraordinary relationship with Mi Rucheng

I think if they are, this is what I am worried about

Think about it

We have been in charge of the emperor's granary for so many years

How can there be no mistakes

How can there be no rats and insects

It is inevitable that he is short of weight

Right, the numbers of these losses have been added up year after year

It is also a big number

If he is investigated and asked for a crime

It is not up to him

Liu Tongxun's tongue is wet no matter how hard it is

He wants to get out of the prison

That's easy to handle

He wants to go to jail

Then no matter how unjust you are

you can't scream

Oh no

You are such a mess

My Cao Yun is such a mess

This is a thorn in the eyes of others

Especially that old guy Mi Rucheng

He is such a cunning person

Let me tell you

What does he do?

He has nothing to do with anyone

But who he knows about

is very clear

If he is taken over by Liu Tongxun

Oops

Take it out from his mouth

It will be a human life

As long as Mi Rucheng's mouth is sealed

we can withstand Liu Tongxun's knife

hmm

Hey, you are looking for death

Who are you scolding

Oh Master

There is a madman in front of you on the road

He is meditating cross-legged

This person who is meditating cross-legged is not a madman

Is it the Buddha? Let me see where it came from.

Sir, please slow down.

It's okay.

Isn't this the entrance to Dayanfang Hutong?

Isn't it the old Songtou who sells spiritual charcoal? You are carrying a big scale pole

...

...

...

...

...

...

You are tired from selling charcoal

You want to take a breath here

But this is not the right place for you to sit

Your face is blue

You must be being bullied

Why are you so angry

Just leave it like this

I will ask Lao Mu to come to your shed tomorrow

I’ll buy you a load of white

I don’t owe you a cent of charcoal money, okay

Please make way, old man

Yo

Hahaha

Oops, I mean Old Songtou

You should keep this scale for yourself

A blind person

Go away

Get out of the way

Lao Mo, don’t expect him to give way to us

Let’s take a detour

Hey

Drive, drive, drive, drive

Oh, oh, drive, drive, drive, drive, drive, drive

Yellow River recruits arrive

In previous years, 12 horses came

Why only 6 came this year

Why only 6P came?

Let's say this

Six water fetchers died this year

Brother

Get off the sedan

Master, you are back so soon

Call Liu Huanyue

I have something to ask him

By the way

Let Liu Hanyu come to the master's bedroom

It's still a study room

Of course it's the study room

Midnight

Have you ever seen me let my maid come to my bedroom

Bastard

Tao Bao said the wrong thing

Master

Your brother Hui flew back from his hometown in Jiangnan

Well, he also brought a letter from the young master

Liu Hanyue is giving him water and food at the moment

Really

Look how stupid I am

If you birds and pigeons could all talk

Wouldn't the world be in chaos

Okay, which house are you angry at

Just fly to the palace

Go tell the emperor that our master scolds you

When the emperor heard this

scolded me, the emperor

This is better for Brother Dehui

You lead the way

Take 300 guards with you

Go and raid your master's house

Unlucky

The master is back

Haiyue

You are not crazy or crazy

How did you talk to a pigeon

And you said it so ugly

It was because this pigeon couldn't understand human language

I was just talking to him for fun

But if he understood what you said

Bringing Ouchi guards to search the house

Is that also a joke?

But sir, you

have never scolded the emperor.

I'm joking with you.

You can talk to pigeons.

It's because of your pure nature.

...

...

...

...

I will only say a few words

Han Yue

Tonight Miao Zongshu went to inspect the warehouse in person

He never inspects the warehouse

Do you think there is any article in this

When the Wind Rises

Where is the movement first

Leaves

No

It's a bird's nest

Bird's nest

No one knows the wind better than a bird

There is movement in the bird's nest must be

A sign of the wind

That said

Miao Zongshu already knew that the great seal was coming

No

Miao Zongshu is crazy

That granary is a bird's nest

Oh, what you mean is

Miao Zongshu wants to throw sand and stones into the granary

He also wants to uproot a big tree

Which big tree to uproot?

Of course it is your big tree

Oh

I understand

You have warned me a long time ago

Miao Zengshu will fight me sooner or later

It seems that this evil hour has arrived

It is hard to say whose evil hour it is

Well

You said it well

Han Yu, if you say this

I can feel relieved

I encounter difficult things on weekdays in the cold moon

You always help me

Help me to overcome difficulties many times

Although your title is that of a maid

But in my eyes

You are really assisting me, a second-grade imperial official

A female master who serves the imperial court

The master said this

It is really hard for a slave to bear the blame

I am just serving tea and water for the master

I am not serving as an official for the master

If this false reputation spreads

If something happens to the master

I will really not be able to escape the blame

Hahaha

Everyone in the capital knows that I bought a stunning maid

But they will never think of it

...

I spent money to buy a Zhuge Kongming with a hairpin ring

Haiyue

You tell me

What should I do next

The master comes back from finishing his errands every night

What is the most important thing

Close your eyes and rest

So tonight

Have you finished your errands?

You mean I can't sleep tonight

You have to find someone

Who

Lord Liu

You mean Lord Liu Tongxun

Didn't the master say

The civil and military forces of the Manchu Dynasty

The only one who can help you at this critical moment

Is Lord Liu the only one

But it's so late

How can I disturb Master Liu

Tonight tonight

Master Liu may not go to bed so early

Why

I remember the master said

Every fifteenth full moon

Master Liu has to go to a barber shop in the dead of night

to have his hair shaved

This has been his habit for many years

It has never changed

Let's drink.

He only drank three bowls

Well

Your big head looks like an old taro

He's not easy to cut

Right

Hey, if you cut off my ears

Wouldn't it look more like a taro? Hi

You calmed down

Those ears of yours

I'll keep them safe for you

Oh, then I have to thank you, hehe

Master, um

Someone wants to give you a painting

Where is the person who sent the painting

I asked him to wait outside the door

Well, look at his dress

It looks like it came from the Yellow River.

It's a Yellow River patrolman.

The Yellow River patrolman sent the paintings.

Weird.

Who sent it?

Well, listen to the patrolman.

A mage asked him to send it.

...

...

What's the deal with the mage?

You go tell him

Just say that I, Liu, have bad eyesight

I don't know how to draw

I dare not accept the mage's love

Hey

The old man died as a soldier

The whole city of Beijing is looking for you

It’s the middle of the night

Don’t tell me when you’ll see me to collect it

It’s an unknown thing

Hey, me, me, me

Just give him a message now

Well

Then shave

Hey, hey, hey

Fei Xiao

Ah, that’s right

Where is the letter from Brother Hui

Jiangnan is afraid of rain

Myolie is a little wet

This Mihe is getting more and more outrageous

Last time I burned a piece of white paper

This time I burned a ladder again

Listen to Butler Pang

Master Mi has been studying in the attic for three years

He has never gone downstairs

I am burning this picture now

I must want you to put it down

from the attic

Ridiculous

If he doesn’t want to study anymore

Then let him jump down from upstairs by himself

How to write a reply

Wait until I get back to my house

Go to Mr. Liu's house

Carry the sedan chair

This is strange now

The old Songtou who sells spiritual charcoal at the entrance of the alley

What happened today

Sitting on the food board in the middle of the street

Talking crazy things

This is the Song Dajiang you are talking about

Song Dajiang is a weirdo

Why is it weird

This is a nickname he was called after he went crazy

This is a nickname

He is really crazy

Isn't that crazy

When Yongzheng was in power

He is still working as a seventh-grade magistrate in Jiangnan.

I don’t know why.

I wrote a thousand words in a daze.

He said that he asked the emperor to build a large scale with 100,000 rods to collect grains. Isn't this an unfair excuse to scold the emperor?

...

...

...

...

I heard that Tian Wenjin was asked to participate in a book

The emperor was annoyed

He picked the top without saying a word

He went crazy like this

Isn't that crazy

On the day of picking the top

The old man had dark hair

He ran into the capital in one breath carrying the big scale.

He said he wanted to dedicate this large scale to the emperor

Hey, he has been making a fuss like this for two or three years

I don’t know how many times he has been beaten

Hey, what about this old man

He just got the nickname Song Dawei

From now on

He no longer has the energy to make a fuss

Hey, just find a shabby house at the entrance of our alley

Set up a stall during the day

Sell some spiritual charcoal

Guess what at night

Still writing

His Wan Yan Zhe

Still writing Zhezi

If he doesn't write it, he is crazy

What did you just say

He is still carrying the big scale

A big scale

Hey, grandpa, you haven't picked out your ears yet

Lao Mu, get in the car quickly and go find Lao Songtou

Master, take a look

This

Is he the Yellow River Patrolman who sent

flowers to the mage

Yes

No matter how hard I push him, he won't leave.

This is no longer urgent.

Why don't he just kneel down?

You underestimate me, Mr. Liu.

Just let him kneel down to drive the car.

I think you can kneel here for the rest of your life.

Open the bamboo tube.

Slowly.

Let me ask you.

When the master asked you to give this painting

, how much money did he give you to kneel down?

The little one did not kneel down for the money

The little one only knelt down for a sentence

For what sentence

When the master asked the little one to give this long scroll

to Mr. Liu, he said

The blessings of all people in the world are entrusted to you

Just rely on these words

The young one has to kneel down

The mage really said that

There is no joke in the army

Expand

Sir, what did you see

Leave quickly, oops

Come on, Master Liu has spoken

Come on, leave quickly

Come on,

Master Liu

If you really don’t accept this, go away

Let’s go

Let’s go

Get out quickly

ha ha

ha

What’s that painted on the painting?

Stop talking and go

Guest Officer

We just said that Song Dacheng is dead

How did he die?

He was burning something in the house just now.

While burning, he babbled something crazy.

He didn’t have to pee.

The old man drank the old salt brine.

What crazy thing did he say? Don’t dare to talk nonsense

...

...

...

...

Administer Cao Ce and burn paper money for the Qing Dynasty

Song Dacheng

Someone told me that you were a seventh-level magistrate

I can’t believe it

If it hadn’t been for so many years

How could you not know my name, Liu Tongxun

Ask me to carry the scale for you

Inside and outside the capital

Who doesn't know

I, Liu Tongxun, love to meddle in other people's business

Now that I have met you in front of you

I believe it

Half an hour ago

You were sitting in the middle of the road blocking my car

You want to entrust me with your broken scale

But I

You just scolded me right

I, Liu Tongxun, am a blind person

These three words

should not be the paper money drawn to the Qing Dynasty

...

Let me, Liu Tongxun, do something stupid again

Use these three words of yours

in exchange for a good coffin

Lao Mu quickly chased the Yellow River patrol

Hurry

Thunder and Thunder

Warrior

Please stay

The Fourth Master was warmed

Li Xiaoshan

Where is the master

I was wondering too

The master was still there just now

Why did he disappear in the blink of an eye?

Who has been here just now

Er Zhang Tianyu

Mr. Zhang has been here

What did Mr. Zhang say to his master

Mr. Zhang said that in the evening

the water of the Yellow River has been transported to Da Nei

It seems that the master will not sleep tonight

He must stay up all night

No way

It's almost time now

What do you know?

Oops

Go quickly, go quickly

Oops

Your Majesty

Let the servant release it for you

If it hurts the Emperor's hand

That slave is more than worthy of his crime

Hengcheng

It was you who came up with the idea of calling the firecrackers a big banner

If you really blow up my hand

The emperor exploded

Hey, this is a happy thought

If you really blow up my hand

Then I will become the emperor of the ages

The one-armed Emperor Qianlong is gone

Your Majesty

These loud noises

must have woken up those who were on night duty, Zhang Jing

Really

These few noises have woken up all the sleeping people

Well, remember it for me

From now on

If I wake up every night

Or there is something urgent for you to do in the early morning

I will set off firecrackers

This

Hey Hengchen

What did you think of this

Tell me

Report to the Emperor

This thing about Fang Baozhu's sedan chair

The slave was just telling a joke

I didn't expect the emperor to take it seriously.

Isn't this good?

It's more interesting than beating the gong to raise the flag

It's no fun to beat the gong

I don't like gongs

I like firecrackers

You said these firecrackers are really the best in the world

Either don't ring

If they want to ring, he dares to ring it to the sky

I heard that firecrackers are set off in the palace

not just to wake up people in the middle of the night

What else is there for

Report to the Emperor

The purpose of setting off firecrackers in the palace is to drive away ghosts

To drive out ghosts

Could it be that there are ghosts in my imperial city too

You deserve to die, slave

This slave is old and confused

There are no ghosts in this imperial city

Get up

You are not confused

If there is really a ghost in this palace

Let's set off a few firecrackers to chase the ghost away

Wouldn't it be a good thing

The young emperor in a good mood was happy to see

The firecrackers he set off

Really woke up Zhang Jing who was on duty all over the palace

You guys pass the message for me

Tonight I am going to test the water of the Yellow River at Qianqing Palace

Okay

Master

Master Jiro Mi of Cangba is waiting for you in class

Got it

Oops, that's terrible

I didn't know Cang Weng was here

I'm disrespectful hahaha

Oops, they say Yan Qing’s forehead can run a race

I saw it today

It’s really not bad

Well, if you fix it like this

Haha, this forehead

It’s like a flat river

Really hahahahaha

As the saying goes, haircut

It doesn’t look bad if you shave your face

Hahahahaha

Please take a seat

There is something strange happening tonight

Mr. Miao, who never checks warehouses

single-handedly raided the second warehouse of Wangan Taiping

According to my prediction

his raid

must have other motives

What is this? This is exactly what I want to ask

When waiting for other people's articles to be published

I will naturally find out

Cangfeng, I, Liu Tongxun, have a premonition

I won't complain

You said

The first big storm in the Qianlong Dynasty

probably started in this royal granary

The ancients said

There is such a strong wind in the forest

Yes, the forest in Cangchang is really too big

It would be strange if there is no strong wind

...

I already have a vague feeling

The first person to lose his head in the Qianlong Dynasty

I am afraid that he will be among the officials of the hidden factory

Since you and I thought of it together

There is something I don’t need to hide from you

You came just in time tonight

I have something

I want you to take a look at

What is it

Please come with me to the study

This thing is related to my

life

It is related to life

What is it?

A picture and a picture

Picture

okay

Where did this picture come from?

It was sent by a mage to the Yellow River Xinbing.

It has been in my hands for less than half an hour.

Then how do you plan to collect this picture?

I dare not keep this picture without permission

Why

The Master gave me this picture

Not asking me to keep it

but asking me to send it out again

Send it out again

To whom

Your Majesty

Your Majesty

The Master asked you to dedicate this picture to the Emperor

The Master left a letter in the picture

The letter said

This picture and this scene

were what he saw with his own eyes during the disaster year of the Yongzheng Dynasty

It took three years to paint

Yan Qing

You said

The master asked you to hand over the picture to the emperor

Why is this

He didn't say anything in the letter

He just left two sentences

Which two sentences

Offering a picture to purify one's death

Not sacrificing the death of the people

Don't say it

I understand

The Master asked you to sacrifice your life to offer a picture

To meet the emperor with a picture

But I can't figure it out

There were so many capable ministers in the Qing Dynasty

Why did he let me, Liu Tongxun, take such a risk

You are a loyal minister known to everyone in the Qing Dynasty

If he didn't look for you, who would he look for?

But I really want to dedicate this picture to the emperor

There is only one death in the ending

Aren't you afraid of death?

When I received this picture

I'm really scared

Then I advise you not to send it

Don't send it

I'll send it tonight

It's so late

I screamed in Qianqing Palace

This is the first time for me

I disturbed everyone's sweet dreams

In the future, I will inevitably disturb your dreams in the middle of the night

Is Tian Wenjing here?

Lao Chen is here

I once heard Huang Ama say

If Tian Wenjing lies down and falls asleep

Even three horse whips won't wake him up

Why is that?

It's because you Tian Wenjing is on errands for the Qing Dynasty

You are too tired

I am just thinking about it

Let someone send another riding whip to your house

to see if I can wake you up

Report to the Emperor

Although the old minister is in the disabled group

I can't stand it

Indeed never

Lie down to sleep early

Never lie down to sleep

So you sleep standing up

Hahaha

I was just telling a joke to Mr. Tian

It seems that everyone is in a state of wonder

In the middle of the night

knelt down in a daze

I can still laugh

It’s not easy

Let’s all be flat

Long live my emperor

Long live

This is the water regime booklet I transferred from the Ministry of Industry

. It records

the results of the imperial inspection of the Yellow River water in the first month of each year.

It also remembers the water regime of the Qing Dynasty every year.

...

...

...

...

It has been 87 years since the water was tested and verified

The Emperor's Holy Ming

I just heard

that the Yellow River Flood Soldiers delivered the Yellow River water for verification

This is the first time I have weighed the water in Dabao during the day

I don't dare to hesitate

I called you to my side

I also want to borrow your virtue

Hope to see a water situation that is in line with God's will and the people's heart

Let the people of the world plant this year's food with confidence

The emperor cares about the people

We must be grateful to God

Luo Tai's

Let's open the city

This is to send the water of the Yellow River

Welcome Lin Chong

Opening

Bingshuima

Sing

One month's water is six pounds, three liang and five cents

The emperor checks the scale

Six pounds and three taels and five cents

Ground test of February's water

February's water is six pounds and two taels and seven cents

The emperor's verification

How come the second bag of water is clear for 8 knots

Your Majesty, there is a lot of rain in this water, and there is less rain.

Cleared 8,000 water in one month

Is it because of sweat

Your Majesty, don’t be anxious

Wait until 12 bags of water are weighed before we can have a definite number

Six pounds and two taels seven dollars

Weigh three months of water

and

Three months of water Six pounds and one tael of wine money

Do you see clearly

Return to the emperor to see clearly

true

Six pounds and one tael of wine money

That’s

Called April water

April water is five pounds and nine taels and nine dollars

Water of the Five Mountains

December water is five pounds and six ounces and seven dollars

The water in December is sixty-two cents lighter than the water in January

According to the establishment of Shui Zhong

More rain, clearer and less rain

It is obvious that there will be a severe drought this year

They all say that the sky is affectionate

But the sky has dealt such a heavy hand in my year of reform

...

This

What else can I say

In fact, I should also know

In the history of history

God has never been kind to the Lord of Gai Yuan

Has anyone seen the year of Gai Yuan

God has blessed the abundant rain and dew

The mighty and warm spring breeze

No

God

I don’t have mercy on my younger brother

But

I don’t blame God

I’m not confused in my heart

God doesn’t mean to have trouble with me

It’s just a reminder to me

Tell me a word

That is, the four words left to me by the late Emperor

It is not easy to serve you

There is only one thing I am thinking about now

That is how to explain it to the people of the world

I don’t want the people of the world to be starved of food in the first year of Qianlong

No clothes to cover the body

...

I don’t want to be ashamed of my ancestors in my first year as emperor

...

Mr. Gao

Pick up your handkerchief

I know you mean well

You and I thought of going together

I don’t want to see anyone in the palace of the Qing Dynasty

Tears streaming down my face

Help Lord Gu Cong down to take a breath

I'm breathing hard

I'm hurt

How can I do something for me

Your Majesty

Oh no

When the late emperor was in power, weren't there severe disasters every year?

Can this be said to be the injustice of heaven to the late emperor

Who is heaven

The sages said that the king regards the people as his heaven

The sky is my good omen for the people

Only if I create well-being for the people of the world

will the sky repay my kindness

I have a word now

Ask all my dear friends

I want to ask

If there is a severe drought this year

Who in the world can worry about me

I am willing to go through fire and water for the Emperor

Tian Wenjing

Open the Thousand Miles of Rivers you dedicated to me

Let all the ministers have a look

This

This long scroll

is my favorite

It is called Thousands of Miles of Rivers

The reason why I love him

It’s because I know that in this picture

there is the great country left by the late emperor for me

What is the country

The country is the foundation

It is the foundation of life

It is the paradise that I and the people of the world rely on to survive

Putting the country in the painting

That is to say, keeping the country in my heart

Now I want to show you another picture

The person who sent me the picture

I asked him to kneel outside the gate of Qianqing Palace

I did this

for the sake of the face of my ancestors

I cannot let such a picture

stain the palace of the Qing Dynasty

What should I call this picture?

There are also 5 big characters written on the picture

Call Qianli to starve

Open the store

Qianlong's anger

Let Liu Tongxun know that he will die

The first thing he did after retreating from the court

was to go straight to a coffin shop in the capital

Guest Officer

Take a look

Birthday material

Ah

This one here is cheap and affordable

You have to spend more money here

Be particular

As the saying goes, money is important

Don’t have money

Then it’s up to you

Sir

Is this your first time to buy a coffin

For the first time

Look at you like this

You look like a teacher

Hahaha guest

I’m not afraid of you laughing

Don’t think we are in the coffin shop

Hey, sometimes I feel puzzled for our ancestors

You said this ancestor invented the Chinese characters

Why do we need to add a wooden character to the word "coffin"

Hey, why did

choose the word "wood" for the five characters of metal, wood, water, fire and earth?

Come on like this

Take a look

This official official

will become a coffin

Hehe

What are you talking about?

You didn't realize that our master is the official of the imperial court.

Oh yo yo yo yo yo

Court ordering officer

Court ordering officer

Did anyone go to the coffin shop?

Hahaha Hey Guest

Let me tell you something unpleasant

If he really is the court ordering officer

We just invite him

He doesn’t dare to come

Bajie Mu

That's not the case

If he didn't do anything evil

I'm sorry for the court

Then he's not afraid

But if he lives like a god, he will be afraid

Who are you talking about like a god

Look at you

I'm right

You are just teaching.

You don’t even know about the big things in the world.

Don’t you think this is obvious?

Corrupt officials.

What I want is glory and wealth.

Three wives, six concubines and eight sedans.

...

...

...

Hey

The tattoo on his nose is fine snuff

The top of his tongue is chewing delicacies from mountains and seas

Hey, or so the common people say

The person sitting in the upper Yamen is an official sedan

The flower in the lower court

That is official silver

Hey, when you pick up the bowl, it is Guan rice

Such a mouth

Hey, shut the gun

Hahaha, tell me

Let me tell you something rough

Hey, even a fucking fart will make the oil explode

Hahaha

You said this is what the official did

Isn’t this impressive enough

He has to think about immortality

He thinks about immortality

Can he not be afraid of the coffin

Ah

According to what you say

Those who are upright officials are not afraid of coffins

Hey

That’s right

If you are afraid of him, you will not be clean.

I can’t tell, it’s interesting to talk about it

Let me tell you this

You say

Is there a more unique place in the world than this coffin

Yes

Yes No

No

This is an official

Why don’t you just wear a black gauze hat weighing one pound and two liang

It’s messed up

The worst is to lie down here

Isn’t it just one day earlier and one day later?

Hey, you stupid corrupt official

Hey, I don’t believe it

He is more courageous than us men

If you don’t believe us men, let’s compete

Oh, I’m not even afraid to death

I’m afraid of you

Hey, aren’t you greedy? I’ll sue you

I'll sue you for your jail sentence

If I win, you should die

You

Can't win

Can't win

I have ready-made longevity materials anyway

I just lie down inside

Maybe we can still have a good name, right?

Hahaha

If you really do that

There are so many good officials in the world

Here

What a pity

You are just an official for sale

Not an official

There is an extra piece of wood in your life

Haha, I drank too much

Just listen to my drinking talk

This is my drinking talk

I want this red leather coffin

Oops

Sir, you have good eyesight

This is eighteen levels of true energy

Eighteen layers of white hemp collapsed

This is called the Five Blessings and Birthdays

Shamuguan

I want two mouthfuls

Two mouthfuls

Hey, he wants two mouthfuls

Could it be that this family carried two of them together in one go?

Lao Mu ah

You said that before Song Daxiang died

he was still holding a weight in his hand

What is it for?

This can't be eaten even in the underworld

Master

Do you see if there are eyes under the weight?

There really is an eye

What is it for?

Huh, it goes without saying

The person who made the scale used it to cheat the scale

Oh, I understand

This Song Dynasty scale is still holding on to the weight after it is dead

He hates this weight

If he takes him to the King of Hell to complain

People like him

have suffered so much

It is not allowed to sue in the underworld.

Then you can only go to the underworld to sue.

I don’t believe that this can only be done in the underworld.

[Chinese]

奶奶

奶奶醒醒

醒醒有粥了有粥了

奶奶您怎么不吃啊

孩子

自己吃吧

你的奶奶已经死了

刘大人

看来灾民所说周厂克扣赈粮之事

完全属实

周厂把总来了没有下官在

下官审时给刘大人住口

刘刘大人

下官做错事了吗

我问你拨下来的赈灾粮食在哪

都在库里啊

下官特意派了8个弟兄守着呢

我问的是周长

每日派运到州场来的赈粮都在锅里啊

哼

knock knock knock

停下

沈时

下官在你站到锅边来

你可睁大眼睛看好了

我问你

户部的衙门司官告诉没告诉过你

州场失镇的法章

告诉了

怎么说的

所失镇州必须后可查快

你看这筷子插上了吗

没有

you can

这已是粥吗

别说是插得住筷子

就是想捞几颗米粒都办不到

这么一锅稀汤挂水的东西

你让饿的站都站不稳的饥民们吃

这还算得上是救命的粥吗

还算得上是皇恩浩荡吗

还算得上是是朕的父母官吗

刘大人

人多米少

要是蝈蝈都是后周

这周厂就办不下去了

我沈石也是替朝廷分忧啊你住口

刚才你都看见了

那些个灾民都是活活的被饿死的呀

刘大人

我

我沈石真的是在替朝廷分忧啊

朝廷拨的那些赈米

我要是个个出的都是后周

不出三日

这周场就完了

你们这对得起朝廷吗

对得起那些端着碗

想求一条活命的灾民吗

说呀

说呀

刘大人

我我这就去扛米去

这就煮出一锅锅插得住筷子的厚粥

迟了

迟了

迟了是

什么意思

大清律法

粥厂失粥

筷子浮起

人头落地什么

筷子扶起

人头落地

对

筷子扶起

人头落地

这是黄冈王献来人哪

在

请出王命旗牌着

刘大人

你不是不是真的要杀我吧

真的杀你

哈哈哈哈哈哈哈

刘大人你是在练我沈石的胆吧

王命旗牌之下

岂能儿戏

刘大人

我沈石和弟兄们都是冤枉的

是冤枉的

一个不留斩

ma ma ma

刘大人

能让我沈石跟我老母亲再见一面吗

行刑在即

恐怕你见不到了

不

我的老母亲她就在周昌

娘亲娘爹娘

娘来了

来了

娘娘娘娘

来了

娘

娘

娘

娘

儿不孝啊

儿不孝

儿让老天爷端着碗在粥厂领粥喝呀

不不不

是啊

你尽孝了

你是娘的孝顺儿子

你刚才不是说了吗

从今天起

粥里头锅里头要多加米

要煮好粥让娘吃

有这句话

你就尽孝了娘

儿对不起

亲娘儿让娘喝的是清水粥

啊

哈哈哈

oh

儿啊

娘

亲

娘儿

今天咬下自己的肉

为您老人家过富了

娘儿

啊

啊娘

老实讲

牛牛

你不该随你有罪的儿子走啊

刘大人

这是存粮库房的钥匙

请你打开它吧

21条人命

难道我杀错了

难道沈石真的是没有办法

为灾民煮出能够插筷子的厚粥

可是可是

朝廷拨下的赈粮又到哪里去了呢

难道说

那些赈粮根本就没有全部运到州场来

苗大人啊

您要是不说这是株什么树

下官还真不知道

这五谷丰登的树是奇妙之处

哎是啊

是啊哈哈哈

孟子曰啊

数亿五谷

以倒数卖计

以书这五谷捆于一棵树之上

使其共荣共生啊

以树之茂

带动五谷之盛

这是不是国富民强之象啊

是是是哈哈哈

古人说

五谷为养

以卑职之见

若为养民

非五谷所不能养

呃若为养国

非五谷所不能待之

不多日皇上就要举行更极大典

嘿嘿苗大人给皇上献上这五谷之术

定能增进祥瑞

以悦皇上之心呐

啊哈哈哈

你们看

这五谷树

似插遍五谷之穗

实际以万民之心呐

啊看看它长得像不像一颗万民伞呐

啊

哈哈哈

像像像像

户部尚书张大人到哈哈哈

张大人请

请请请

漕运总督潘大人到

哎呀呀哈哈哈

哎呀苗大人呐

哎呀可喜可贺呀

吃赢了哈哈哈

哎呀呀哈哈哈

哎呀韩大人呐

你的消息真是灵通啊

我苗府稍有一点动静

想瞒也瞒不过你

哎呀

我这也是从田文镜大人那得到的消息

哦哈哈哈

哎呦好大的五谷树啊

这田大人

他是怎么知道

我给新皇上扎这五谷树的哎呦

苗大人

你可是太小瞧田了

当年田大人替先帝搬差的时候

那很多事啊

先帝还没有听到

可是田大人呢

就有了耳闻

既然田大人已经知道了

为什么不把他请来先睹为快呀

哎呦田大人

人虽然未到

可是话呀

还是捎到了

田大人让谭某

我先问问你

这五谷之树上扎的五谷穗子

是不是雍正年间时候留下的穗子

哎呀那还用说

哈哈这些五谷都是先帝刚母所种

那就好哈哈哈

田大人说呀

只要用的是雍正

爷留下的五谷穗

这扎出来的五谷树啊

它就是一株吉祥树哦

哈哈哈哈哈哈哈

叩见

堂侍郎米汝成

米大人到

堂堂监督王连生

王大人到

启禀米大人

仓场总督苗中书

苗大人此时就在太平仓内

米大人若要进仓

待下官前去禀报一声

是吗

苗大人也在

苗大人来了已有两个时辰

怎么没见苗大人的轿子啊

苗大人是独马而来

大门开着

米大人进是不进啊

进又如何

不进又如何

苗大人有谕

进者立斩

进者立斩

什么意思

苗大人正在舱内

必查黄粮掺假之案

不许任何人进舱干扰

哈哈哈哈

好好

苗大人亲自下仓捉拿蛀虫

我大清国的粮仓自然可以保得平安了

启万安仓

米大人且慢

苗大人刚去过万仓

王梁残甲之弊

太平万安两仓最盛

莫非苗大人在万安仓已有所截获

下官不知详情

那好吧

既然苗大人亲自查仓

我米某也就放心了

请王连生向苗大人回禀一声

就说米汝成暂且告退了

最近可有什么耳闻风声啊

苗大人是说

皇上昨生李汝成为苍苍总督之风声

嗯

怎么

它越刮越大了

哈哈哈

刮风未必下雨啊

不过有一条我苗某是认定了他

米汝成升任之日

就是我苗宗枢调离之时

怎么

害怕了

哈哈哈

苗大人

你可不能离开啊

这苍苍这块肥肉

咱们不能留给野狗啊

为了咱弟兄们都有一把好柴火烧啊

粮仓这块青山

我苗某是留定了

有苗大人这句话

咱们老哥们也吃了一颗定心

丸哦哈哈哈

不过苗大人

那个新任的刑部侍郎刘同勋对

他可是跟米汝成的关系非同一般

我想他们要是这正是我所担心的

你想啊

咱们给皇上管了这么多年粮仓

哪能没个闪失

哪能没有一个鼠耗虫事

难免是短斤少两

对吧这些折损的数字连年叠加

也是个不小的数字啊啊

要是一追究起来问个罪

那还不由着他

刘统勋舌头怎么滚怎么湿啊

他要滚到牢外

那还好办

他要滚到牢里头

那就任凭你有多大冤枉

你也喊不出声来

哎呀

你这苍苍一大摊子

我那曹运一大摊子

这可都是别人眼中钉啊说的是

尤其是米汝成那个老家伙

他老滑头一个

我告诉你啊

他做什么事吧

跟谁都不沾边

可是他对谁的事

还都知道的是一清二楚

这要是他被刘统勋给收了

哎呦

从他嘴里掏出来的

可都是一条条人命哦

只要封住米汝成的嘴

咱们就能扛住刘统勋的刀

hmm

嘿你找死呢

你老木骂谁呢

哦老爷

那前头有个疯子在那路当间啊

盘腿打坐呢他

这盘腿打坐的可不是疯子

是佛我看看是哪方下凡的

老爷您慢点啊

不碍事

这不是大染坊胡同口

卖灵炭的老宋头吗

怎么喝风了

哎

卖灵炭的问你呢

哈哈哈

老宋头啊

你这扛着根大秤杆

是卖炭走累了

想在这歇口气吧

可你这坐的可不是地方啊

你这脸色发青

是让人欺负了吧

你怎么生这么大的气啊

这么着吧

明儿我叫老穆到你那棚子里去

买你一担白

炭炭钱分文不欠行不

求你老人家给让个路

呦

哈哈哈

哎呦我说老宋头

这秤啊还是你自己留着用啊

有眼无珠之辈

走开

让开走

老莫别指望他给咱们让道了

咱们还是绕路走吧啊

哎

驾驾驾驾

哦哦哦驾驾驾驾驾驾驾

黄河新兵到

往年都来12匹马

今年怎么只来了6匹啊

怎么只来了6P啊

这么说

今年死了6位取水的

弟兄

落轿

老爷您这么快回来了

把刘环岳叫来

我有话问他

对了

让柳含玉到老爷的卧房

还是书房啊

当然是书房啊

三更半夜

你见过我让女婢到过我的卧房吗

混账

是陶豹说错嘴了

老爷

您的辉哥从江南的老家飞回来了

嗯还捎来了少爷的信

这会刘含月正在给他饮水喂食呢

是吗啊

你瞧我多蠢呀

要是你们鸟啊鸽子啊都会说话

那这世上不就乱了吗

好你们在哪个府上受了气

就往皇宫里一飞

去跟皇上说我们家主子骂你

皇上一听

骂我皇上

这还了得辉哥

你给带着路

带上300大内侍卫

去把你的主子家给抄了

不吉利

老爷回来了

海月

你不疯不痴的

怎么跟个鸽子说上话了

还说的这么难听

正是这鸽子听不懂人话

我才跟他说着玩的

可他要是听懂了你的话

带着大内侍卫来抄家

那也是说着玩的吗

可是老爷您

也没骂过皇上呀

老夫跟你说笑了

你能和鸽子说话

正是你的天性纯良所致

寒月

这么晚了老夫还来找你

是想问你一件事情

老爷坐下说嗯

我只说几句话

韩月

今儿晚上苗宗枢亲自去查仓了

他可是从来不查仓的

你说这里面有什么文章吗

起风之时

何处先有动静

树叶

不

是鸟窝

鸟窝

知风莫如鸟

鸟窝里有了动静必是

起风的征兆

那这么说

苗宗枢已经知道大封将至

不

苗宗枢就是疯

那粮仓就是鸟窝

哦你的意思是说

苗宗枢要在仓场之中来一个飞沙走石

他还想连根拔起一棵大树呢

拔起哪棵大树啊

当然是老爷您这棵大树了

哦

我明白了

你早就提醒过我

苗增书迟早会和我动手

看来这个恶时辰到了

到底是谁的恶时辰还难说

嗯

你说得好

韩愈你这样一说

老夫可就放心了

寒月平日老夫遇见难解之事

你总是助我一臂之力

帮助老夫屡屡渡过难关呐

你的名分虽然是女婢

但是在老夫的眼里

你实在是辅助我这位二品京官

为朝廷效命的女师爷

老爷这么说

奴婢真是难当罪责了

我只是在替老爷端茶送水

可没在替老爷做官

要是这不实的名声传出去

老爷万一出了什么事

那我可真是难逃罪责了

哈哈哈

这京城上下都知道我米五成

买了一个绝色的女婢

可是他们绝对不会想到

我花钱买了一个一头钗环的诸葛孔明

海月

你说吧

老夫下一步应该怎么走

老爷每晚办完差回来

最要紧的事情是什么

闭目养神

那今儿晚上

您办完差了吗

你是说我今天晚上睡不成了

您必须去找一个人

谁

刘大人

你是说刘统勋大人

老爷不是说过

这满朝的文武

在节骨眼上能帮您的

只有刘大人吗

可这么晚了

我怎么好去打扰刘大人呢

今儿晚上

刘大人未必就会这么早早的睡下的

为什么

我记得老爷说过

每逢十五满月

刘大人都要在夜深人静之时

到一家剃头铺子刮头打遍

这是他多年的积习

从未更改

喝酒了吧

才喝了三碗

嗯

您这爷的大脑袋怎么看都像个老芋头

他不好下刀啊

是吧

哎你要是把我这耳朵割了去

那不就更像芋头了嗨

您呐沉住了气

您那俩耳朵

我替您保全着呢

呦呵那我就得谢您这位爷了嘿嘿

老爷嗯

有人要送您一幅画

送画人在哪啊

我让他在门外等着呢

嗯看他那个打扮啊

像是从黄河边上来的

是个黄河巡兵

黄河巡兵送画

蹊跷

谁让送的

嗯听那个巡兵说呀

是有个法师让他送来的

我刘某从不吃斋念佛

也没有出家的亲戚

和法师有何往来啊

你去告诉他

就说我刘某人眼神不好

不懂得画

不敢领那法师的情

哎

老爷那个殉兵啊

满北京城找了您

大半夜这才那个

别说了你什么时候见我收过来

路不明的东西啊

哎我我我

这就给他回个话去

嗯

接着刮

哎哎哎

费孝

啊对了

辉哥捎来的信呢

江南怕是下雨了

杏儿都有些潮湿了

这个米河是越来越不像话

上回烧毁了一张白纸

这回呢这回又烧毁一架梯子

听庞管家说

米少爷在阁楼上读书已经三年了

从未下过楼

这会儿烧了这图来

想必是想让老爷您把它

从阁楼上给放下来

荒唐

他若是不想再读书了

那就让他自个从楼上跳下来

怎么写回信

等我回府再说

去刘大人府上

抬轿

今儿这也怪了

胡同口那个卖灵炭的老宋头吧

今儿是怎么了

在街心的粮食板上坐着

满嘴还说着疯话

您说的这是那宋大秤啊

宋大秤这个名怪

怪什么呀

这是他疯了以后才被叫起来的

这是个外号

他真的疯了

那可不是疯了吗

雍正爷当朝的时候

他还在江南做什么七品知县

也不知道怎么着

一糊涂写了个万言折

说让皇上打造十万杆收漕粮的大秤

给每个收粮的

晒场的发一杆

您说说他让皇上打造这10万杆大秤

这不是借着茬骂皇上不公吗

听说让田文进哪参奏一本

皇上一恼

二话没说摘顶子

就这么着疯了

那可不是疯了吗

摘顶子那天

那个老头黑散着头发啊

扛着那大秤一口气跑进了京城啊

说要把这大秤献给皇上

哎就这么闹腾了两三年

也不知道挨了多少回打

哎这个老头呢

才落了一个宋大秤的外号

这以后啊

他再也没力气闹腾了

哎就在咱这胡同口找间破屋子

白天摆个小摊

卖点灵炭

一到晚上您猜怎么着

还照样写

他那万言折

还在写折子

写要不怎么说他是疯了呢

你刚才说什么来着

是他还扛着那杆大秤呢

一杆大秤啊

哎爷爷您还没掏耳朵呢

老木快上车找老宋头去

老爷您您瞧瞧

这这

他就是那个为法师送

花的黄河巡兵吗

对

就是他我怎么撵他他也不走

这不撵急了

干脆他就跪那了

你也忒小看我刘某人了

就让他跪着吧赶车

我看你能在这跪一辈子

把竹筒打开

慢

我问你

法师让你送这幅画的时候

给了你多少下跪的银子啊

小的不为银子下跪

小的只为一句话下跪

为一句什么话

法师让小的将此长轴

送给刘大人的时候说

天下苍生之福就托付给你了

就凭这句话

小的不能不跪

法师真是这么说的

军中无戏言

展开

老爷您看到什么了

赶紧走哎呀

快走吧这刘大人都发话了

你赶紧走吧

快走

刘大人

真的不收此话你走

走

走吧你哎呀

快撤走

ha ha

ha

那画上画的是什么呀

别说了走

客官

咱刚才说那宋大成他死了

他怎么死的

刚才他还在屋里烧东西

一边烧一边唠叨了一句疯话

这不撒泡尿的功夫

这老头就喝了老盐卤

他说了一句什么疯话

他说这是给大清国烧纸钱

给大清国烧纸钱了

我是亲耳听得

不敢胡言

治曹策给大清国烧纸钱

宋大成

有人跟我说你做过七品知县

我不敢信

要不这么多年

你怎么会不知道我刘统勋的大名

找我替你扛秤杆呢

这京城内外

谁不知道

我刘统勋最爱管人家的闲事啊

这会见了你的面

我信了

半个时辰前

你坐在路中间拦我的车

想把你这杆残秤托付给我

可是我

你刚才骂的对

我刘统勋是个有眼无珠之辈

这三个字

不该是画给大清

国的纸钱

就让我刘通勋再做一次傻事吧

用你这三个字

换我的一口好棺材

老木赶快去追黄河巡兵

快快

雷霆雷霆

壮士

请留步

四爷被窝暖上了

李小山

主子呢

我也正纳着闷呢

刚才主子还在

怎么一转眼就不见了

刚才都谁来过

呃张天玉

张相爷来过

张相爷对主子说什么了

张相爷说傍晚时分

黄河之水已运到大内

看来今儿晚上主子是不睡了

准要连夜撑水

不会吧

现在都快子时了

你懂什么呀你

哎呀

快走快走

哎呀

皇上

让奴才替您放吧

要是伤着皇上的手

那奴才可是罪有余辜啊

恒城啊

这份爆竹叫大旗的主意可是你出的

真要是把朕的手给炸

皇上炸了

嘿这事想的痛快

真要是炸了朕的手啊

那朕可就成了千古一帝

独臂皇帝乾隆是也了

皇上

这几声大响

想必把那些值夜的张经都叫起了

是吗

这几声响就把睡着的人都给叫起来了

那好吧给朕记住

从今往后

如果朕每逢半夜叫大起

或是凌晨有急事让你们办

朕呐都会放爆竹

这

哎恒臣

你这主意怎么想的

说来听听

启禀皇上

这这方宝珠轿起的事

奴才不过说个笑话

没想到皇上倒当真了

这不挺好吗

比敲锣叫大旗有意思

尽敲锣没好戏

朕呐不喜欢锣

朕喜欢爆竹

你说这爆竹也真是人间的绝品

要么不响

要响啊他就敢响到天上去

奴才听说这宫内放爆竹

不光是为了半夜叫起

那还为着什么呀

启禀皇上

这宫中放爆竹是为了驱鬼

驱鬼

莫非朕的皇城之中也有鬼

奴才该死

奴才是老糊涂了

这皇城之中没有鬼魅

起来吧

你并没有糊涂

这宫中要真是有鬼的话

放几声爆竹把鬼撵喽

岂不是好事

心情不错的年轻皇帝高兴地看到

他燃放的爆竹

真的唤醒了满宫值夜的张晶

你们替朕传旨

今天晚上朕要在乾清宫称验黄河之水

好

老爷

仓场次郎米大人在课堂等着您呢

知道了

哎呀惨了

不知仓翁驾到

失敬了哈哈哈

哎呀都说燕青老弟的额头可以跑马

今日一见

果然不孬

嗯你这么一修理

哈哈这额头

一马平川呐

是吗哈哈哈哈哈

常言说理理发

刮刮脸有点晦气也不显呐

哈哈哈哈哈

请坐

今天晚上有件怪事

从不查仓的苗大人

单枪匹马突袭了望安太平二仓

依老夫预见

他的这次突袭

必定是另有所图

图什么这正是老夫要请教的

等着别人的文章做出来的时候

自然也就知道了

苍风啊我刘统勋有种预感

不吐不快

你说

这乾隆朝的第一场大风波

很可能就起端于这皇家粮仓

古人说

林中多疾风啊

是啊仓场这座林子实在是太大了

如果也不刮起些大风

那才奇怪

我已经隐隐约约地觉得

乾隆朝第一颗要掉的脑袋

怕就是要处在藏厂的官员之中了

既然你我想到一块去了

有件事我也没有必要瞒你了

你今晚来的正好

我有一件东西

想请你过目

什么东西

请随我到书房来

此物与我

性命有关

与性命有关

对那是何物啊

一张图图对

图

okay

这张图从何而来啊

是一位法师托黄河信兵送来

到我手上还不到半个时辰

那你打算怎么收藏此图啊

我可不敢擅留此图

为什么

法师送我这张图

并不是让我留下

而是让我把它再送出去

再送出去

送给谁呀

皇上

皇上

法师让你把这张图献给皇上

法师在图中留有一信

信中说

此图此景

是他在雍正朝灾年之时亲眼所见

整整画了三年

燕青

你说

法师让你把图交与皇上

这是为什么呢

他在信中没有说

只是留了两句话

哪两句

献图言清死

不献百姓死

你别说了

我明白了

法师是让你以死献图

以图觐见皇上

可我就弄不明白

大清朝有这么多的能臣之士

他为什么要让我刘统勋冒此风险呢

你是大清朝人人皆知的忠臣

他不找你找谁呀

可我要真把此图献给皇上

结局只有一条死

你不是不怕死吗

当我接到这张图的时候

我真是怕了

那我劝你不送

不要送

今晚就送

这么晚了

朕在乾清宫叫大起

朕还是头一回

搅了各位的好梦吧

往后啊朕是少不了半夜搅梦

田文镜来了没有

老陈在

朕曾听皇阿玛说

你田文镜要是躺下睡着了

是三条马鞭子也抽不醒的

这是为什么呢

是因为你田文镜为大清国办差

太过劳累

朕这会正想着

让人再往你府上再送一条马鞭去

看能不能把你打醒喽

启禀皇上

老臣虽是身入残组

病去不堪

确实从不

早早躺下睡觉

从不躺下睡觉

这么说你是站着睡的

哈哈哈

朕刚刚在跟田大人说笑话

看来各位都有神了

深更半夜的

迷迷糊糊的跪着

还能笑出来

不容易啊

都平身吧

吾皇万岁万岁

万万岁

这是朕从工部调来的水情册子

上面记着

朝廷每年正月称验黄河水的结果

也记着大清国每年的水情

上面用朱墨点着的都是灵验了的

朕数了一下

一共有87个红点子

也就是说大清国开国92年

有87年验水验准了

皇上圣明

朕刚才听说

黄河汛兵把要验称的黄河水送到了

这是朕昼登大宝的第一次称水

朕不敢稍有迟疑

把你们叫到身边来

也是想借各位的德

望验出一个顺和天意民心的水情

让天下百姓放心种好今年的粮食

皇上眷念民间

定当感激上苍

罗太这

开城吧

这送上黄河之水

迎林冲

开业

兵水马

唱

一月之水六斤三两五钱

皇上验秤

六斤三两五钱

地验二月之水

二月之水六斤二两七钱

皇上验称

这第二袋水怎么就清了8节

皇上这水中多雨水清少雨

一个月就清了8,000水

莫非是有汗想

皇上莫要着急

等12袋水称完了才能有个定数

六斤二两七钱

称三月之水

and

三月之水六斤一两酒钱

看清了吗

回皇上看清了

true

六斤一两酒钱

既

称四月之水

四月之水五斤九两九钱

五岳之水

十二月之水五斤六两七钱

十二月之水比一月之水轻了六两八钱

按照水众

多雨水清少雨的成立

今年天有大旱之象已是明摆着的了

都说苍天有情

苍天却在朕的改元之年

就下了如此重手

这

朕还有什么可说的

其实朕也该知道的

有史以来

上苍对待改元之君从来就没有宽恩过

有谁见过改元之年

上苍恩泽了丰沛之雨露

浩荡了和煦之春风

没有

上苍

不悯幼弟之心呐

不过

朕不怪上苍

朕心里并没有糊涂

上苍这不是有意要跟朕过不去

只是给朕提个醒

告诉朕一句话

也就是先帝留给朕的四个字

为君不易

朕现在想着的只有一件事

就是如何向天下百姓做个交代

朕不想在乾隆元年

天下百姓就食不果腹

衣不遮体

朕不想在称帝的头一个年头

就愧对列祖列宗

高大人

把你的手巾捡起来

朕知道你是好心

你和朕想到一块去了

不想看见有人在大清国的国殿上

泪流满脸

把顾从大人扶下去喘口气

苦喘成这样

伤了身子

如何替朕办事

皇上

啊不对

先帝在位的时候不也是年年重灾吗

这能说是苍天对先帝的不公

苍天是谁

先贤说王者以百姓为天

苍天就是朕的益兆百姓

朕只有为天下百姓谋造了福祉

苍天才会还恩于朕

朕现在有一句话

问问众爱卿

朕想问

今年如果真是大旱

天下有谁能为朕分担忧愁

臣等愿为皇上赴汤蹈火

田文镜

把你献给朕的那幅千里家河图打开

给这各位臣工看看

这

这卷长轴

是朕的心爱之物

它叫千里江河图

朕之所以心爱于他

是因为朕知道在这幅图上

有先帝替朕留下的大好江山

江山是什么

江山就是基业

就是立命之本

就是朕和天下百姓赖以生存的乐园

把江山收于画中

也就是将江山收在了朕的心中

朕现在要给你们再看一幅图

给朕送图的那个人

朕让他跪在了乾清宫的殿门之外

朕这么做

是为了列祖列宗的脸面

朕不能让那样的图画

污了这座大清国的国殿

这幅图该怎样称呼呢

图上也写了5个大字

叫千里饿殍

打开店门

乾隆的震怒

让刘统勋自知必死

退朝后他办的头一件事

就是径直来到了京城的一家棺材铺

客官

您瞅瞅

寿材啊

啊

这边这张便宜实惠呀

这边来您就得多掏点银子了

讲究

俗话说有钱讲究

没钱将就

那就看您

先生

您是头一回买棺材吧

头一回

瞧您这样

像是教书的

哈哈哈客官

不怕您见笑

别看咱们是做棺材铺行当的

哎有时候挺替咱老祖宗纳闷的哎

你说这老祖宗造字啊

干嘛要让这个棺字加个木

哎那金木水火土五个大字的

干嘛偏提出一个木字来

这么一来啊

你瞅瞅

这个当官的官

就变成就变成棺材的棺了

嘿嘿

你胡说些什么呀你

你没看出我们老爷就是朝廷的命官呐

哎呦呦呦呦呦呦

朝廷命官

朝廷命官

有往棺材铺跑的吗

哈哈哈哎客官

我跟您说句不中听的话

他真要是朝廷命官

咱就是请他

他不敢来

八戒木头

那倒不是

他要是没做伤天害理

对不起朝廷的事

那他不怕

可他要是活得跟神仙似的他怕怕

你说的跟神仙似的是什么人呐

瞧瞧您

我说对了吧

您光顾着教书了

这天下大事您都不知道了

这不明摆着吗

贪官啊

哎想的是荣华富贵

三妻六妾八抬大轿

想要银子有银子

有了银子买鼎子

没了银子卖鼎子呀

哎

他的鼻子下头纹的是上等的鼻烟

这舌头上头嚼的是山珍海味

哎要么老百姓说的啊

这个上衙门坐的是官轿

下窑子花的

那是官银

哎端起碗来是关米

这么一张嘴

嘿他妈关枪

哈哈哈您说说哎

我我跟你说句糙话啊

哎就是他妈放个屁都崩出油花来

哈哈哈

您说这这官做的

这够风采的了吧

他得想着长生不老

他想着不死

见了棺材他能不怕吗

啊

照你这么说

做清官的就不怕棺材啦

哎

对喽

怕他就清不了

清不了有意思说下去

我跟您这么说啊

您说

这天下有没有比这棺材更绝的去处

有没有

有没有

没有

这当官啊

不就戴个一斤二两的乌纱帽吗

弄砸了

大不了往这里边一躺

不都早一天晚一天的事吗

嗨这狗日的贪官

嘿我就不信了

他比咱爷们胆气足

不信咱爷们比比啊

啊我死都不怕了

我怕你个球啊

哎你不贪吗我告你

我告你的狱状

我告赢了你死吧

你

告不赢

告不赢

我这反正有的是现成的寿材

我自己个往里边一躺

说不定咱还留个英名呢不是

哈哈哈

要真这么着啊

这天下好官就多

喽

可惜啊

你只是个卖官的

不是个做官的

你的命里啊多了根木头啊

哈哈我这多喝了点

您就只当听我这说酒话呢

我这是酒话

就要这口红皮棺材

哎呦喂

先生您有眼力

这是游了十八道真气

崩了十八层白麻

这叫五福拜寿

沙木关

我要两口好嘞

两口

嗨他要两口

莫不是这家子一口气一块背过俩去

老木啊哎

你说这宋大秤临死前

手里还攥着个秤砣

干什么用

这到了阴间也不能当饭吃

老爷

您看那秤砣底下有没有眼啊

还真有个眼

干什么用的

哼那还用说

使秤的人用来骗秤的呗

哦我明白了

这宋大秤死了还抓着秤砣不放

是恨这个秤砣呀

他要是带着他去阎王爷那去告状

像他这样的人呐

吃了那么大的苦

阳间告不准的状

那只能到阴间去告了

我就不信这状非得到阴间才能告成

Key Vocabulary

Vocabulary	Meanings
粥 /zhōu/ A1	noun - porridge
赈灾 /zhèn zāi/ B2	noun - disaster relief
饥民 /jī mín/ A2	noun - starving people
救命 /jiù mìng/ A1	verb - to save lives
皇恩 /huáng ēn/ B1	noun - imperial grace
父母官 /fù mǔ guān/ B2	noun - parental officials
厚 /hòu/ A1	adjective - thick
插 /chā/ A2	verb - to insert
筷子 /kuài zi/ A1	noun - chopsticks
米粒 /mǐ lì/ A1	noun - grain of rice
稀汤 /xī tāng/ A2	noun - thin soup
饿死 /è sǐ/ A2	verb - to starve to death
孝顺 /xiào shùn/ B1	adjective - filial piety
清水 /qīng shuǐ/ A1	noun - clear water
咬 /yǎo/ A2	verb - to bite
富 /fù/ A1	adjective - rich
折子 /zhé zi/ B1	noun - memorial
秤 /chèng/ A2	noun - scale
告状 /gào zhuàng/ B1	verb - to file a complaint