– English Lyrics

Lyrics & Translation

[English]

Hey, you feeling better? Yeah, I think

that fifth shower actually got the

interview off me.

So, do you have any other possibilities?

Oh, yeah. Well, there is the possibility

that I won't make rent. But if you want,

I can lend you some money. No, no, no.

Cuz if I couldn't pay you back right

away, then I'd feel guilty and tense

every time I saw you. Oh, okay. Well,

then why won't you uh why won't you

borrow it from mom and dad? You feel

guilty and tense around them already.

You might as well make some money off of

them.

[Applause]

[Music]

Hi. Hi. Hi, darling. So, what's this?

Some of your old stuff. Well, sweetie,

we have a surprise for you. We're

turning your room into a jam.

Wow, that is a surprise. Just one little

question. Uh, why not Ross's room? Gosh,

we talked about that, but your brother

has so many science trophies and plaques

and merit badges. Well, we didn't want

to disturb them. Oh, God forbid.

You know, you know that Stephie Graph

has quite a tush.

I'm just saying it's right there.

Hey guys. Hi, darling. Where's my

grandson? You didn't bring him? No, he's

at uh Carol's and Susan's today. A woman

in my office is a lesbian.

I'm just saying.

Oh, Jack, look. There's that house bank

commercial that cracks you up.

Where have you been? Emotional hell. So,

did they lend you the money yet? No, but

that's probably cuz I haven't asked them

yet. Come on, Monica. Do it. Hey, you

guys. Um, Monica has some news.

Um, yeah. So, uh, listen, I'm sorry I

didn't tell you this before, but, um, I

I'm no longer at my job. I I had to

leave it. Why? Because they made me.

You were

fired. What are you going to do? Judy.

Judy, relax. This is our little

harmonica we're talking about. We taught

her. Well, 10% of your paycheck. Where

does it go? In the bank. The bank.

There you go. So, she dips into her

savings. That's what it's there for.

She's going to be fine. And if you need

a little extra, you know where to find

it. Anything larger back there?

[Applause]

Okay, here you go. You can pay me back

whenever you like.

You have dinosaur checks?

Yeah. Yeah. I mean, you get your money

and you learn a little something. What's

wrong with that? Nothing. Nothing. Hey,

you're a Cheaposaurus.

I'm kidding. I'm kidding. Thank you. I'm

very grateful. Hey, Mom. What is this?

Oh, um, that was my bathing suit from

high school. I was a little bigger then.

Oh, I thought that's what they used to

cover Connecticut when it rained. Hi.

All right. Listen, can we watch cartoons

on your television? We need a porn

break. We spent the last two hours

watching In and Out and In again.

So, why don't you just turn it off?

Because then we'd be the guys who turned

off free porn.

Oh, good. You're here. Hey. Hi. What you

got there? Oh, this. Well, I'm glad you

asked. Now, don't you hate it when you

have to cut a tin can with an ordinary

steak knife?

Now, I know what you're thinking.

Pregnant woman slays four.

Evie, they didn't make you pay for those

knives, did they? No. Are you sure? No.

Honey, you're not going to make enough

money to help Frank and Alice just by

selling knives. No. No, I know that. But

I'm just need to make enough money for

the second part of my plan. What's the

second part of your plan? My Saturn

dealership. What I'm doing for dinner

tonight.

Well, I guess I got to start saving up

for Ross's birthday. So, I guess I'll

just stay home and eat dust bunnies.

Can you believe how much this is going

to cost? Do you guys ever get the

feeling that um Chandler and those guys

just don't get that we don't make as

much money as they do? Yes. Yes. Really?

It's like they're always saying, "Let's

go here, let's go there." Like, we can

afford to go here and there.

Yes. Yes. And it's And we always have to

go to, you know, someplace nice. I know,

you know.

God, it's not like we can say anything

about it cuz like this is a birthday

thing, you know, and it's for Ross. For

Ross, for Ross.

Oh my god. Hey. Hi. What? Okay, I'm at

work. It's an ordinary day, you know.

Chop, chop, chop, sauté, sauté, sauté.

All of a sudden, Leon, the manager,

calls me into his office. Turns out they

fired the head lunch chef. And guess who

got the job? If it's not you, this is a

horrible story.

Fortunately, it is me and they made me

head of purchasing. Thank you very much.

Anyway, I just ran into Chandler and was

downstairs and they think we should go

out and celebrate. You know, some place

nice.

Some place nice. How much you think I

can get for my kidney?

All right. What's going on? Okay. Look,

you guys, I really don't want to get

into this right now. No, I think it'll

just make everybody uncomfortable. Fine.

All right. All right. You're fine. All

right. You can tell us. Yeah. Hello,

it's us. All right. We'll be fine. Yeah.

Okay.

Um uh we three feel like that. Um

sometimes you you guys don't get that.

Uh

We don't have as much money as you.

Okay. I hear you. We can talk about

that.

Well,

then let's

Well, um I I guess I just never think of

money as an issue. That's cuz you have

it. That's a good point.

So, um, how come you guys haven't talked

about this before? Cuz it's always

something, you know, like with Monica's

new job or the whole Ross's birthday

hoopla. What? Whoa. Hey, I don't want my

birthday to be the source of any kind of

of

negative. There's going to be a hoopla.

Basically, there's the thing and then

there's the stuff after the thing and

it's if it makes anybody feel better,

then we can just forget the thing and

and we'll just do the gift. Can't gift

gift? The thing's not the gift.

No, the thing was we were going to go

see Hoody and the Blowfish. Hoody and

Oh, I I I can catch them on the radio.

No, now I feel bad. You want to go to

the concert? No. Look. Hey, it's my

birthday and the important thing is that

we all be together. All of us together.

Not at the concert.

Okay. Yeah. Thank you. Thanks. Yeah.

So, the Ebola virus, that's got to suck,

huh?

Hey, Jack. Look at the window. There's

my name. Hi, me.

I remember the day I got my first

paycheck. There was a cave-in in one of

the mines and eight people were killed.

Wow. You worked in a mine? I worked in a

Dairy Queen mine.

God, isn't this exciting? I earned this.

I wiped tables for it. I steamed milk

for it. And it was

totally not worth

it. Where's Fica? Why is he getting all

my money?

I mean, what, Chandler? Look at that.

Oh, this is not that bad. Oh, you're

fine. Yeah, for a first job. You can

totally totally live on this. Oh, yeah.

Yeah. Hey, by the way, great service to

You know that girl you went to college

with who who became a movie director?

Oh, yeah. Dana Keystone. She was in my

movement class.

What's a movement class? It's Chandler's

way of pretending he didn't take mime.

Oh, well, listen. Anyway, she's

directing the new Al Puccini movie. You

got to get me an audition. Oh, I don't

know, man. I haven't talked to her in

like 10 years. Oh, no. No. Please,

please, Chandler. I I would owe you so

much. You do owe me so much. You owe me

3,400.

Why are you changing the subject? What?

Will you make the call or what? Oh,

okay. I'll I'll try. All right. Thanks.

You're the best. Now, listen. The last

day of auditions is Thursday, okay? So,

I got to get in there by Thursday. Okay?

Just remember Thursday. Thursday. Can

you remember Thursday?

Yeah. So, Tuesday,

Rachel.

Oh my god.

[Applause]

I swear I've seen birds do this on Wild

Kingdom.

What are you guys doing here? Well, we

were in the city shopping and your mom

said you work here and it's true.

Look at you in the apron. You look like

you're in a play.

Hey. Hey. Hey. Hey. How much did you

guys take the super this year? Yeah, we

were going to give 50, but if you guys

gave more, we don't want to look bad.

Oh, actually this year we just made him

homemade cookies.

And 25 it is.

You gave him cookies. Money is so

impersonal. Cookie says someone really

cares.

All right, we're broke. But cookies do

say that.

I can see that. A plate of brownies once

told me a limmerick.

Let me ask you something. Were Were

these uh funny brownies?

Not

especially, but you know what? I think

they had pot in them.

So you guys, who else did you tip with

cookies? Uh, the mailman. The super Oh,

and the newspaper delivery guy.

Oh my god. What?

I don't think you're going to like this.

Oh gosh. Oh, there's a cookie smashed in

the sports section.

Look, and he did my crossword puzzle.

Yeah, but not very well. Unless 14

across Gershwin musical actually is Bite

Me, Bite Me, Bite Me, Bite Me. Found you

in my

bed. How' you wind up there? You are a

mystery. Little black curly

hair. Little black curly hair. Little

black, little black, little black,

little black, little black curly hair.

Thank

you. Um, now if you want to receive

emails about my upcoming shows, then

please give me money so I can buy a

computer. What just happened? I am so so

sorry. I was going to do it really. But

then I was standing there with

$327 in one hand and $238 in the other

hand. And I was thinking, "Wow, it's

been a long time since I

had 327 plus $238."

Joey, we had a deal. That That's why

you're here. I've got to fire you. And I

got to pay

rent. Look, how how about this? You

don't fire me. Instead, I stay here. I

gain their trust and then they'll start

listening to all the nice things I've

been saying about you.

Kind of things you've been saying. Well,

nothing yet. They really hate you and I

want to fit in. Excited about our

wedding plans and well, I guess pretty

soon we'll be making a big withdrawal

from the Monica wedding fund.

What? You tell her, Jack. I can't do it.

What happened? You still have the Monica

wedding fund, don't you? We have it.

Only now we call it the beach house.

I can't believe you spent my wedding

fund on the beach house. We're sorry,

honey, but we just assumed if you got

married after you turned 30, you'd pay

for it yourself. You bought the beach

house when I was 23. Which means you had

seven years of beach fun, and you can't

put a price on that, sweetie.

I really do feel bad about this, though.

We started saving again when you were

dating Richard, but then that went to

hell, so we redid the kitchen.

What about when I started dating

Chandler? Well, it was Chandler. We

didn't think he'd ever propose.

Clearly, I did not start drinking enough

at the start of the meal.

I can't believe it that there is no

money for my wedding. We might still

have some money if your father hadn't

thought it was a good idea to sell ice

over the internet. It seemed like such a

simple idea. Stupid, Jack. The word is

stupid. All right, enough. I don't want

to hear about it

anymore. Good luck, Chandler. Okay,

everybody, stop what you're doing. I

need envelope stuffers. I need stamp

lickers. Well, hey, who did these

resumes for you? me on my computer.

Well, you sure used a large font. H

Yeah, well, uh, waitress at a coffee

house and, uh, cheer squad co- captain

only took up so much room.

Hey, that's funny. You're funny,

Chandler. You're a funny guy. You know

what else is really funny?

Something else I might have said.

I don't know. I don't know. Weren't you

the guy that told me to quit my job when

I had absolutely nothing else to do? Ha.

Sweetie, calm down. It's going to be

okay. No, it's not going to be okay,

Ross. Tomorrow is my last day, and I

don't have a lead.

Okay, you know what? I'm just going to

I'm just going to call Gunther and I'm

going to tell him I'm not quitting.

Well, you you you don't want to give

into the fear. You and your stupid fear.

I hate your fear. I would like to take

you and your fear. Hey, I got great

news. Run, Joey. Run for your life.

You know what? Let's just go. No. Hey,

we're not leaving till we get paid. I

don't know who she thinks she is. Enough

is enough.

Hey, listen to me.

Excuse me. Excuse me.

Thanks. Um, clearly this is a very, very

hard time for you. Um but um we provided

a service and we deserve to be paid

because you ate that service and um we

are not leaving here until we are paid

every penny because you know what lady

we're part-time caterers and we have no

place else to go.

All right, I'll get my bag. Good.

[Laughter]

I'm going to leave some cards here.

Please think of us for your next event.

[Music]

Hello. Hi. We'd like to close our

accounts. Close your accounts? Is there

some kind of problem? No, no, no. We

just like to close them.

Okay. Miss Lambert handles all our

closures. Would you come over here,

please?

Hi, I'm Karen.

I want to quit the bank.

So, you didn't leave the bank? No. And

somehow we ended up with a joint

checking account.

What are you ever going to use that for?

To pay for the gym. You really have to

make it a theme wedding. And the theme

could be look how much money we've got.

You know, I mean, you could put you

could put money in in the invitations.

You you could have like little money

play settings and uh you could start

with a money salad. I mean, it'll be

dry, but people will like it. Would you

stop? We've only been going on a couple

of weeks. I mean, we don't even know if

he's going to propose. Yes, but this is

Pete, okay? He's not like other people.

On your first date, he took you to Rome.

For most guys, that's like a third or

fourth date kind of thing.

Well, if if that's what it is, then it's

it's crazy. Monica's right. We're

talking about getting married here,

okay? She she can't just rush into this.

Oh, what do you know? You married a

lesbian.

You know what? Actually, I'm kind of

glad they're leaving cuz uh I need to

talk to you about something.

What's up? Well, this uh this may be a

little awkward. Listen, if you want to

borrow money, it's kind of a bad time.

I'm buying dinner for 128 people

tomorrow night.

[Music]

Hey, can I borrow the Porsche? Okay,

but uh what is it not? A place to

entertain my lady friends.

And what else is it not? Place to eat

spaghetti.

Very good. Thanks. What do you need it

for anyway? Oh. Uh, the, uh, Powerball

lottery is up to 300 million, and they

don't sell tickets here in New York, so

Oh, so you're driving up to Connecticut?

Yeah, Connecticut, not West Virginia.

Hey, maybe I'll drive you up there. I'd

like to buy some tickets myself. Yeah,

with Chandler not getting paid, we could

really use $300 million.

Yes, because if I was at my old job,

we'd say, $300 million? No, thank you.

Hey, will you get me tickets, too? Yeah,

me, too. Sure. Oh, I have an idea. Why

don't we all pitch in 50 bucks? We'll

pull our money together and then if we

win, we'll split it. That's a great

idea.

No thanks.

You don't want to win the lottery? Uh,

sure I do. I also want to be king of my

own country and find out what happened

to Amelia Heheart.

Still on Amelia Heheart? The woman just

vanished.

Susie Ross, you don't want in on this?

No. Do do you know what your odds are of

winning the lottery? I mean, you have a

better chance of being struck by

lightning 42 times. Yes, but there's six

of us, so we'd only have to get struck

by lightning seven times. I like those

odds.

Seriously, you guys, I can't believe

you're going to spend $250 on the

lottery. I mean, that's such a bunch of

boohhockey.

I'll

ask hockey.

Oh. Oh, we think Emma is about to start

talking, so we're trying to be careful

about what words we use in front of her.

Yeah. So, get ready to hear a lot of uh

boo hockey, gosh darn it, and brother

pucker.

How do you know she's going to start

talking? Well, when I talk to her, I

almost feel like she understands what

I'm saying. Kind of like Joey.

What's that now?

[Music]

Key Vocabulary

Vocabulary	Meanings
interview /ˈɪntərvjuː/ B2	noun - a formal meeting to assess someone's suitability for a job or role
possibilities /ˌpɒsɪˈbɪlɪtiz/ B1	noun - things that might happen or be true
guilty /ˈɡɪlti/ B1	adjective - feeling or showing regret for having done something wrong
tense /tens/ B1	adjective - unable to relax because of worry or nervousness
surprise /səˈpraɪz/ A2	noun - something unexpected that causes pleasure or shock
disturb /dɪˈstɜːrb/ B1	verb - to interrupt someone or something
tush /tʌʃ/ C1	noun - buttocks
commercial /kəˈmɜːʃl/ B1	noun - an advertisement on television or radio
emotional /ɪˈmoʊʃnl/ B2	adjective - relating to or influenced by emotions
fired /faɪrd/ B1	verb - to dismiss someone from a job
paycheck /ˈpeɪtʃek/ A2	noun - a slip of paper showing someone's earnings
savings /ˈseɪvɪŋz/ A2	noun - money that is saved
dinosaur /ˈdaɪnəsɔːr/ A2	noun - a reptile of a diverse group that dominated life on Earth for millions of years
grateful /ˈɡreɪtfəl/ B1	adjective - feeling or showing thanks
bathing /ˈbeɪθɪŋ/ A2	noun - the act of washing one's body
porn /pɔːrn/ C1	noun - sexually explicit material
pregnant /ˈpreɡnənt/ B1	adjective - having a baby developing inside the body
knives /naɪvz/ A2	noun - cutting tools