- Doctor?
- Come in, Mr. SquarePants.
00:04
Please, have a seat
on the couch.
00:07
Let's unload
all that harmful information
00:12
in your little yellow head.
00:16
[knocking]
Ding-dong!
00:18
- Who are you?
- Old professor Plankton,
00:27
door-to-door salesman.
00:30
"Professor Plankton's
personal products?"
00:34
I'd simply love
one of your Krabby what's its,
00:39
but my delicate digestive system
has special needs
00:41
and I'll need to see
a complete list of ingredients.
00:45
You wouldn't want me
to be up all night
00:48
with painful bloating,
would you?
00:50
Stand aside, restaurant critic
coming through.
00:56
I'm a restaurant critic,
so I get cutsies.
01:01
Cutsies? What's a cutsie?
01:04
I get to cut in line,
so move aside.
01:06
What is this world coming to
01:12
when a fake restaurant critic
can't get cutsies?
01:14
We look ridiculous.
01:21
Nobody's going
to buy this disguise.
01:22
[grunting]
I agree.
01:24
This is a horrible idea.
01:26
See? You guys
are agreeing already.
01:28
Free cleaning service?
01:33
Good day, kind sir,
01:37
would you like to buy
some Gill Scout cookies?
01:38
Hello, sir... [clears throat]
01:46
[higher pitch]
Hello, sir,
01:47
I'm selling
Sweetie Patrol cookies.
01:48
Look at it, Squidward,
01:51
Mr. Krabs' gift
to all of Bikini Bottom:
01:52
Okay, give it to me.
01:57
Come on, SpongeBob, stop it!
02:02
I swear, I'm not doing anything.
02:03
Mr. Krabs,
the Krabby Patty is haunted!
02:07
Avast ye, patty pirate.
02:11
[upbeat jazz music playing]
02:17
Uh, have you seen
a Krabby Patty?
02:25
It's about this tall, and...
02:27
Are you a magician?
02:32
One time, I saw this magician
02:34
and he took this thing,
and he...
02:35
Anyway, and then he told us:
02:38
"If you believe in yourself
and with a tiny pinch of magic,
02:39
all your dreams can come true."
02:46
Once again so close
and yet so far.
02:55
Well, I think
I'll have another one.
03:01
[groans]
All the way from the bakery.
03:16
But it'll all be worth it
when I finally get my hands
03:19
Right now, it's important
that we discuss
03:23
an emergency situation.
03:25
Like the lost gold of Atlantis,
03:28
many consider the Krabby Patty
to be a treasure.
03:30
And as with every treasure,
03:33
there's a thief
ready to steal it,
03:35
so it's up to you to be
the watchful eyes of...
03:37
It's Mr. Krabs'
business rival, Plankton!
03:42
Eat my microscopic dust, Krabs.
03:46
But wherever
there's a secret recipe,
03:49
there is someone
who wants to steal it.
03:52
And now for the final touch.
04:00
With this disguise,
that formula is as good as mine.
04:05
Yum, yum. This spaghetti
sure is good. Belch.
04:20
Meatball, meatball,
spaghetti underneath.
04:24
Ravioli, ravioli,
Great Barrier Reef.
04:26
Roses are red,
violets are blue,
04:36
world domination
has nothing on you.
04:40
I guess she's not a poetry fan.
04:46
But if you're Mr. Krabs,
then who's...
04:47
Mr. Krabs is a robot!
04:50
You can't stand a chance, Krabs.
05:09
- Plankton?
- Don't tell Krabs.
05:14
Poor guy, the ice
is really getting to him.
05:16
Oh, we gotta bust him out quick!
05:18
I'm gonna sit on him!
05:20
Patrick, no! He's very...
05:23
[ice breaks]
fragile.
05:24
Sandy, please! Language.
05:32
Krabs? What are you doing
in my hotel room?
05:52
Good luck
on your retirement, Plankton.
05:59
I won't give you
any more trouble.
06:01
Oh, I know you won't, Krabs,
06:03
because I'm
at the Krusty Krab right now
06:05
stealing that formula.
06:08
Oh, sure.
Whatever you say, old timer.
06:10
How would you be doing that
06:13
when you're all the way
over here in Dullsville, hmm?
06:15
Because I'm
a decoy look-alike robot!
06:20
Watch where you're standing,
coral brains.
06:31
Sandy? You don't look so good.
06:34
Hey, you've got to stop eating
at the Chum Bucket.
06:36
That stuff
will rot your insides.
06:38
The Chum Bucket will always
be my favorite restaurant!
06:41
Sandy,
you don't sound like yourself.
06:44
No, Sandy is herself.
06:49
No reason to be suspicious
in any way, y'all.
06:51
Well, as long as there's
no reason to be suspicious.
06:56
[sighs]
That was close.
06:58
Now it's time
for a little wakey-uppy.
07:03
Everyone in Bikini Bottom
showed up!
07:21
This is going to be so sweet.
07:24
Buddy, you just stay right here
07:37
and daddy's gonna go get
the secret formula
07:39
and whip you up the best batch
that we ever whipped up.
07:41
Be right back, Gare Bear.
07:44
[laughs]
Yes, SpongeFool!
07:46
Come right back
with your complete undoing
07:48
and victory will be mine!
07:51
My name
is Sheldon R. Shellcleaner,
08:02
of Super Shell Cleaner
Vacations Unlimited.
08:06
Why, hey there, little fella.
08:11
Is SpongeBob...
I mean, your master at home?
08:13
Perhaps I could just
come inside for a minute
08:17
and demonstrate
our fine snail products.
08:19
Shell polish, slime deodorant,
08:22
Your friends
won't tell you this,
08:28
but you can really use
the slime deodorant, smelly!
08:30
Greetings,
citizens of Bikini Bottom.
08:36
Behold my imperial
Chum Colosseum!
08:39
I knew I should have used
pipe cleaners.
08:53
Hello,
I'm your long lost relative.
08:56
Can I have the secret formula?
08:58
Good day, sirs,
I would like to pilfer your...
09:03
I mean, purchase a Krabby Patty.
09:07
Hmpf, watch me sucker this guy.
09:10
That'll be
a mere one hundred dollars.
09:13
That's all? Why, certainly.
09:17
Hey, wait a minute...
09:27
There's chum all over this bill.
09:30
Hey, wait a minute,
aren't you the same guy
09:38
what was giving away
them rotted chum samples before?
09:42
Uh, oh, that wasn't me.
09:45
That was, uh, my brother-in-law.
09:47
Yeah, uh, Flankton.
09:50
[laughing]
Finally I have a foolproof plan
10:00
to steal the Krabby Patty
secret formula.
10:04
Krabs will never recognize me
wearing... these glasses.
10:06
Hmm, I think
our darling little decoy
10:21
still needs something.
10:24
Ow, ow! Hot, hot! Ow, ow!
10:47
[screaming]
Yow! Alakazam!
10:52
I am the genie of the bottle!
10:55
Eh, ah, ah, ah, eh!
10:58
Don't worry
about the patty, Patrick,
11:01
I'll take it to Plankton myself
like a good little conscience.
11:03
Yup, I'm Patrick's conscience,
but I overslept.
11:17
Well, if you're
my conscience's conscience,
11:21
It's a bug, step on it!
11:25
You're all mine,
you sweet Krabby Patty.
12:00
Can I have the secret formula?
12:07
But he was persistent.
12:11
- Pretty please?
- Uh-huh.
12:12
Hmm, I was sure it was
one of Plankton's tricks.
12:25
Well, at least his money's good.
12:29
You knew I would never
distrust a dollar!
12:35
All right, you can sit down
for five minutes,
12:38
then it's back to work.
12:40
Drats, he's not collapsing
from exhaustion.
12:44
But with a little more pressure
12:47
the sponge will crack
like an egg.
12:49
Then I'll be there
to feast on the goo
12:52
of his shattered psyche.
12:55
Something ain't right.
13:05
Don't you find this
a tad suspicious?
13:16
Suspicion doesn't hold a candle
to birthday wishing.
13:19
[gasping]
Hold on there, me boy,
13:30
we don't need to go
through all that again.
13:32
Hold it right there, Plankton.
13:39
- Krabs!
- I'll take that.
13:41
How did you know it was me?
13:43
Next time, wear a disguise
without your initial on it.
13:45
Hmm, perhaps a pepper shaker
was a bit obvious.
13:48
Hey, you kids
get off of my lawn!
13:53
That's right, run, Krabs,
13:56
for I have found
your Achilles' heel.
13:58
I'll freeze you out of business
14:02
and I'll do it
with your precious thermostat!
14:05
He's so small
he could be anywhere.
14:11
He could be
right under our noses.
14:13
F-Frank, where's your mustache?
14:18
Blast it, pollen allergies!
14:43
Fluoride to Desktop,
15:04
I'm in a position
to raise no suspicion. Over.
15:06
Cut the poetry, Wordsworth.
15:10
Did you get
Krabs' hair sample yet?
15:12
Keep your pants on, woman.
15:14
I'm gonna steal his hairs
right out of this razor.
15:16
- I'll just grab the razor
here... - Wait! No!
15:21
[disgusted groaning]
15:33
Now for the rest of it.
15:36
Ghost-extracting machine!
15:38
I look like I just saw a ghost.
15:57
In this new gaseous form,
16:06
I'll be able
to silently squeeze
16:08
through the cracks
of the Krusty Krab.
16:10
Krabs will never see me coming.
16:21
[grunts]
Can't see my own feet.
16:32
You better believe it.
16:39
This high-powered
mechanical bio arm I invented
16:41
should pry
those restaurant doors open
16:44
[short circuit noises]
16:51
What the barnacles?!
16:53
Come on, you piece of garbage!
16:55
Ouch! Uncle, uncle!
17:00