- Before I begin,
I must stress
00:02
that I'm trained
in couples therapy.
00:04
- Duh.
That's why we hired you.
00:06
- But you two aren't
a couple, correct?
00:08
You're just friends?
00:10
- Yes, Gary. God!
- Keep up.
00:11
Why don't the two of you
tell me
00:13
why we're all here,
especially me?
00:15
- Gary, will you let us
just talk?
00:16
It all started this morning
00:22
outside the storage room.
00:23
- Wait! No, no, I wanted to do
the flashback music.
00:26
- All right, fine.
Whatever.
00:28
It all started this morning
00:31
outside the storage room.
00:33
We were having
the same conversation
00:36
- So where do you want to go
for dinner after work?
00:39
- I don't know.
What do you feel like?
00:41
- I feel like I want you
to decide for once.
00:43
- No, you know I hate Chinese!
00:47
- Well, don't ask what I want
00:49
if you don't want to know
the answer.
00:50
But then things got weird.
00:52
- I was really upset.
01:11
- Sure, walking in on employees
disrespecting your space
01:13
would be upsetting to anyone.
01:16
- What?
No, that part was fine.
01:18
I was upset because Ian and I
01:20
just don't find
the same things funny anymore.
01:21
- How could you not find that
utterly hilarious?
01:23
- I don't know.
It just didn't grab me.
01:26
you have to help us
get our spark back.
01:31
- [man singing]
This is America
01:44
Everyone can climb higher
01:49
- [women singing]
Not you, though
01:52
'Cause you're a part-timer, yeah
01:57
- [man singing]
You can do anything
02:00
- [woman singing]
As long as it's not hard
02:02
- [man singing]
And you can go anywhere
02:04
- [woman singing]
As soon as you get a car
02:05
- [man singing]
You're gonna be a huge success
02:07
- [woman singing]
Come on, that's not who you are
02:09
- [man singing]
You're a part-timer
02:11
Cursed with full-time dreams
02:13
And this low-paying job
is as bad as it seems
02:15
What the [bleep]
are you doing here?
02:22
What the [bleep]
are you doing here?
02:26
Seriously, dude?
- Like, what the [bleep]?
02:30
- So you guys don't find
the same things funny.
02:36
Lots of couples outgrow
each other's senses of humor.
02:40
- We don't want to hear about
you and your wife, Gary.
02:42
Let's try to find
some common ground.
02:48
Anton, what makes you laugh?
02:51
Okay, you know those posters
02:57
with a cat
hanging on a clothesline
02:59
with a caption that reads,
"Hanging in there"?
03:01
- Oh, wonderful stuff.
03:06
Ian, are you seeing
the humor here?
03:08
The only thing that's worse
than a cat in a poster
03:11
is you two right now.
03:13
- Let's try to keep it positive,
Ian, okay?
03:15
Why don't you share something
that you find funny?
03:17
- Okay, sure, yeah.
Gee, let me think.
03:20
Uh, Pete naked
playing beauty shop
03:22
- Stop laughing, dude!
03:29
We were nervous
about our first kiss.
03:31
- So we decided
to get more comfortable
03:33
but helping each other
get over our worst fears.
03:35
- Aw.
That makes sense.
03:37
- Pete is helping me
get comfortable
03:39
with another person
touching my hair.
03:41
- Yeah, and Mads is helping me
get comfortable
03:43
being naked in front of a girl.
03:45
you're way lamer than I thought.
03:49
I think it's sweet.
03:52
- [spits with laughter]
03:53
- Yeah, you're so...
insensitive, man.
03:55
Body issues are real.
03:58
- Body iss--
[laughing]
04:00
- [laughing hysterically]
04:08
Oh, now,
that's what I call comedy.
04:15
- This therapy sucks.
I'm going back to the past.
04:18
Put the harp down, Ian.
04:22
Let's stay in the present
so we can work this out.
04:24
- The present sucks.
04:26
There's no naked hair play here.
04:28
- Now, I'm going to throw
some funny things out there,
04:29
and you guys can giggle
04:33
whenever something tickles
your fancy.
04:34
How about some physical comedy?
04:44
I'm going into the basement.
04:48
- Yeah, that's only funny
'cause of what you're wearing.
04:50
Or is it funny because
04:53
there's no basement door
down here?
04:55
I can't hear laughter.
04:58
- This guy's the worst.
- Seriously.
05:00
- Okay, there's no need
to be rude.
05:02
- Oh, sorry, I thought
you were in the basement.
05:04
- Ian, why don't you just finish
telling your story?
05:05
- Now?
- Go on without me.
05:10
I threw out my back.
05:12
Pete and Mads went looking
for some privacy.
05:18
So, naturally, I followed them.
05:22
- Stop spying on them.
05:25
They're having a nice moment.
05:26
At least someone
around here should.
05:27
- What's that supposed to mean?
- Oh, I don't know.
05:29
I started working out
two weeks ago,
05:31
and you didn't even notice.
05:32
- Uh, yeah, that's 'cause
I don't see you naked?
05:34
And besides,
you're one to talk.
05:36
You totally missed
our friendiversary last month.
05:38
- Oh, yeah?
And what would we have done?
05:40
Gone to get Chinese food
even though you know I hate it?
05:41
- Okay, look, I can't help it
if my palate
05:43
is a little more sophisticated
than yours.
05:45
- Oh, so now
you're better than me?
05:46
- See, you used to talk
to me with respect.
05:49
- No, I mean, like,
be quiet for a second.
05:50
I think they're about to do
the tongue-dango.
05:52
They're--they're about to kiss?
05:55
- Uh, you think
it's gonna rain?
06:01
- Are you serious right now?
06:05
Why aren't you kissing me?
06:07
I say trivial weather stuff
when I'm nervous.
06:10
Why don't we pretend
to be other people?
06:17
Then we won't have to be
so nervous
06:20
about our first kiss.
06:21
You know who I want you to be?
06:25
And who would that make you,
sir?
06:35
- Well, if you're
the famous author,
06:38
- Ooh, am I
on a really tight deadline?
06:45
And, you know, if I don't get
your pages soon,
06:50
I might just have to take back
your three-book deal
06:53
- Ooh, I love the pressure.
06:58
Dude, your sexual fantasy
is so not freaky,
07:13
[with British accent]
I can't get any writing done
in here.
07:20
You'll have to find a place
more private.
07:21
[in regular voice]
Oh, and when you do,
07:23
You know which one.
07:26
- Well, excuse me, gentlemen.
07:30
Seems there's a book
that needs some publishing,
07:32
and I'm the only guy
for the job.
07:35
Did you see how much they like
being around each other?
07:40
Okay, how are you not
finding this hilarious?
07:44
Anton: And that's when
we decided
07:47
to hire a good therapist.
07:49
- But they were all booked,
so we settled for you.
07:50
- The feeling is mutual.
07:52
Let's try one more exercise
07:54
before we throw in the towel
07:56
and I never, ever
come back again.
07:57
- I'll re-create
a moment of conflict,
08:01
and we'll play out a resolution
08:02
that was better
than what happened.
08:03
Now, I'm Pete,
and this is Mads.
08:07
How does that make you feel?
08:11
- I feel like this doesn't
remind me of Pete or Mads,
08:14
and now I'm gonna need therapy
for this therapy.
08:16
- What are you talking about?
This is hilarious, man.
08:19
- This might be working for you,
but it's not doing it for me.
08:21
- Don't worry, Ian.
Now it's your turn.
08:24
Anton, I would break this
over your head,
08:29
but the board of California
prohibits me
08:31
from hand-to-hand combat
with patients.
08:33
- But nudity is allowed?
08:34
- I don't make the rules, Ian.
08:36
You'll have to do it.
- What?
08:37
It's the only way
you'll empathize
08:40
with why Anton was laughing
at your head wound.
08:42
- Okay, I take it back.
08:43
This therapist is awesome.
Rock on, Gare.
08:44
- How is any of this
supposed to help?
08:47
- Anton, let the healing in.
08:48
- I'm gonna heal
the shit out of you!
08:50
- No!
- Get back here!
08:52
- No.
[plate shatters]
08:54
- Oh!
- Talk about a head case.
09:02
- Hey-oh!
[both laughing]
09:04
We're laughing
at the same thing.
09:08
Wow, Gary.
You're a great therapist.
09:11
- Yeah, I mean,
I still hate you but less,
09:13
which is an important step
for me.
09:16
- Finally, some privacy.
09:31
You found your beard.
09:35
I ran all the way home.
09:38
I know how much you like it.
09:39
- [with British accent]
So are you ready
09:41
to collect my draft,
Mr. Random House?
09:43
Okay, beard fantasy
is officially over.
09:56
We don't need to hide
behind anything anymore.
10:02
- Give me that beard.
10:11
- Here, just kind of rip hard.
10:14
- All right.
- Yeah.
10:16
I landed on a pile
of car wash rags.
10:27
