The Real Slim Shady

- MAY I HAVE YOUR ATTENTION PLEASE?

MAY I HAVE YOUR ATTENTION PLEASE?

WILL THE REAL SLIM SHADY PLEASE STAND UP?

I REPEAT, WILL THE REAL SLIM SHADY PLEASE STAND UP?

WE'RE GONNA HAVE A PROBLEM HERE.

♪ Y'ALL ACT LIKE YOU NEVER SEEN A WHITE PERSON BEFORE ♪

♪ JAWS ALL ON THE FLOOR LIKE PAM LIKE TOMMY ♪

♪ JUST BURST IN THE DOOR

♪ AND STARTED WHOOPIN' HER ASS WORSE THAN BEFORE ♪

♪ THEY FIRST WERE DIVORCED, THROWIN' HER OVER FURNITURE ♪

AGH!

♪ IT'S THE RETURN OF THE, AH WAIT, NO WAY, YOU'RE KIDDING ♪

♪ HE DIDN'T JUST SAY WHAT I THINK HE DID, DID HE? ♪

♪ AND DR. DRE SAID, NOTHING, YOU IDIOTS! ♪

♪ DR. DRE'S DEAD, HE'S LOCKED IN MY BASEMENT ♪

HA HA!

♪ FEMINIST WOMEN LOVE EMINEM ♪

♪ CHICKA, CHICKA, CHICKA, SLIM SHADY, I'M SICK OF HIM ♪

♪ LOOK AT HIM, WALKIN' AROUND, GRABBIN' HIS YOU-KNOW-WHAT ♪

♪ FLIPPIN' THE YOU-KNOW-WHO, YEAH BUT HE'S SO CUTE THOUGH ♪

♪ YEAH, I PROBABLY GOT A COUPLE OF SCREWS ♪

♪ UP IN MY HEAD LOOSE ♪

♪ BUT NO WORSE THAN WHAT'S GOIN' ON ♪

♪ IN YOUR PARENTS' BEDROOMS ♪

♪ SOMETIMES I WANNA GET ON TV AND JUST LET LOOSE ♪

♪ BUT CAN'T, BUT IT'S COOL FOR TOM GREEN ♪

♪ TO HUMP A DEAD MOOSE ♪

♪ MY BUM IS ON YOUR LIPS, MY BUM IS ON YOUR LIPS ♪

♪ AND IF I'M LUCKY, YOU MIGHT JUST GIVE IT A LITTLE KISS ♪

♪ AND THAT'S THE MESSAGE THAT WE DELIVER TO LITTLE KIDS ♪

♪ AND EXPECT THEM NOT TO KNOW WHAT A WOMAN'S IS ♪

♪ OF COURSE THEY'RE GONNA KNOW WHAT INTERCOURSE IS ♪

♪ BY THE TIME THAT THEY HIT FOURTH GRADE ♪

♪ THEY'VE GOT THE DISCOVERY CHANNEL, DON'T THEY? ♪

♪ WE AIN'T NOTHIN' BUT MAMMALS

♪ WELL SOME OF US, CANNIBALS.

♪ WHO PEOPLE OPEN LIKE CANTALOUPES ♪

♪ BUT IF WE CAN HUMP DEAD ANIMALS AND ANTELOPES ♪

♪ THEN THERE'S NO REASON ♪

♪ THAT A MAN AND ANOTHER MAN CAN'T ELOPE ♪

♪ BUT IF YOU FEEL LIKE I FEEL, I GOT THE ANTIDOTE ♪

♪ WOMEN, WAVE YOUR PANTYHOSE, SING THE CHORUS, AND IT GOES ♪

♪ I'M SLIM SHADY, YES I'M THE REAL SHADY ♪

♪ ALL YOU OTHER SLIM SHADYS ARE JUST IMITATING ♪

♪ SO WON'T THE REAL SLIM SHADY PLEASE STAND UP ♪

♪ PLEASE STAND UP, PLEASE STAND UP? ♪

♪ 'CAUSE I'M SLIM SHADY, YES I'M THE REAL SHADY ♪

♪ ALL YOU OTHER SLIM SHADYS ARE JUST IMITATING ♪

♪ SO WON'T THE REAL SLIM SHADY PLEASE STAND UP ♪

♪ PLEASE STAND UP, PLEASE STAND UP? ♪

♪ WILL SMITH DON'T GOTTA CUSS IN HIS RAPS TO SELL RECORDS ♪

♪ WELL, I DO, SO (BEEP) HIM, AND (BEEP) YOU TOO! ♪

♪ YOU THINK I GIVE A DAMN ABOUT A GRAMMY? ♪

♪ HALF OF YOU CRITICS CAN'T EVEN STOMACH ME ♪

♪ LET ALONE STAND ME ♪

♪ BUT SLIM, WHAT IF YOU WIN, WOULDN'T IT BE WEIRD? ♪

♪ WHY, SO YOU GUYS COULD JUST LIE TO GET ME HERE? ♪

♪ SO YOU CAN SIT ME HERE NEXT TO BRITNEY SPEARS? ♪

♪ CHRISTINA AGUILERA BETTER SWITCH ME CHAIRS ♪

♪ SO I CAN SIT NEXT TO CARSON DALY AND FRED DURST ♪

♪ AND HEAR 'EM ARGUE OVER WHO SHE GAVE TO FIRST ♪

♪ LITTLE PUT ME ON BLAST ON MTV ♪

♪ YEAH, HE'S CUTE, BUT I THINK HE'S MARRIED TO KIM, HEE-HEE ♪

♪ I SHOULD DOWNLOAD HER AUDIO ON MP3 ♪

♪ AND SHOW THE WHOLE WORLD HOW YOU GAVE EMINEM ♪

- AHH!

♪I'M SICK OF YOU LITTLE GIRL AND BOY GROUPS ♪

♪ ALL YOU DO IS ANNOY ME ♪

♪ SO I HAVE BEEN SENT HERE TO DESTROY YOU ♪

♪ AND THERE'S A MILLION OF US JUST LIKE ME ♪

♪ WHO CUSS LIKE ME, WHO JUST DON'T GIVE A LIKE ME ♪

♪ WHO DRESS LIKE ME, WALK, TALK AND ACT LIKE ME ♪

♪ AND JUST MIGHT BE THE NEXT BEST THING, BUT NOT QUITE ME ♪

♪ 'CAUSE I'M SLIM SHADY, YES I'M THE REAL SHADY ♪

♪ ALL YOU OTHER SLIM SHADYS ARE JUST IMITATING ♪

♪ SO WON'T THE REAL SLIM SHADY PLEASE STAND UP ♪

♪ PLEASE STAND UP, PLEASE STAND UP? ♪

♪ 'CAUSE I'M SLIM SHADY, YES I'M THE REAL SHADY ♪

♪ ALL YOU OTHER SLIM SHADY ARE JUST IMITATING ♪

♪ SO WON'T THE REAL SLIM SHADY PLEASE STAND UP ♪

♪ PLEASE STAND UP, PLEASE STAND UP? ♪

♪ I'M LIKE A HEAD TRIP TO LISTEN TO ♪

♪ 'CAUSE I'M ONLY GIVIN' YOU ♪

♪ THINGS YOU JOKE ABOUT WITH YOUR FRIENDS INSIDE ♪

♪ YOUR LIVIN' ROOM ♪

♪ THE ONLY DIFFERENCE IS I GOT THE BALLS TO SAY ♪

♪ IT IN FRONT OF Y'ALL ♪

♪ AND I DON'T GOTTA BE FALSE OR SUGARCOAT IT AT ALL ♪

♪ I JUST GET ON THE MIC AND SPIT IT ♪

♪ AND WHETHER YOU LIKE TO ADMIT IT, I JUST IT ♪

♪ BETTER THAN 90% OF YOU RAPPERS OUT CAN ♪

♪ THEN YOU WONDER, HOW CAN ♪

♪ KIDS EAT UP THESE ALBUMS LIKE? ♪

♪ IT'S FUNNY, 'CAUSE AT THE RATE I'M GOING, WHEN I'M 30 ♪

♪ I'LL BE THE ONLY PERSON IN THE NURSING HOME FLIRTING ♪

♪ PINCHING NURSES ASSES WHEN I'M WITH JERGENS ♪

♪ AND I'M JERKING, BUT THIS WHOLE BAG OF VIAGRA ISN'T ♪

♪ WORKING ♪

♪ AND EVERY SINGLE PERSON IS A SLIM SHADY LURKING ♪

♪ HE COULD BE WORKING AT BURGER KING, SPITTIN' ON ♪

♪ YOUR ONION RINGS ♪

♪ OR IN THE PARKING LOT, CIRCLING, SCREAMING, I DON'T GIVE A ♪

♪ WITH HIS WINDOWS DOWN AND HIS SYSTEM UP ♪

♪ SO WILL THE REAL SHADY PLEASE STAND UP ♪

♪ AND PUT ONE OF THOSE FINGERS ON EACH HAND UP? ♪

♪ AND BE PROUD TO BE OUTTA YOUR MIND AND OUTTA CONTROL ♪

♪ AND ONE MORE TIME, LOUD AS YOU CAN, HOW DOES IT GO? ♪

♪ I'M SLIM SHADY, YES I'M THE REAL SHADY ♪

♪ ALL YOU OTHER SLIM SHADYS ARE JUST IMITATING ♪

♪ SO WON'T THE REAL SLIM SHADY PLEASE STAND UP ♪

♪ PLEASE STAND UP, PLEASE STAND UP? ♪

♪ 'CAUSE I'M SLIM SHADY, YES I'M THE REAL SHADY ♪

♪ ALL YOU OTHER SLIM SHADYS ARE JUST IMITATING ♪

♪ SO WON'T THE REAL SLIM SHADY PLEASE STAND UP ♪

♪ PLEASE STAND UP, PLEASE STAND UP? ♪

♪ 'CAUSE I'M SLIM SHADY, YES I'M THE REAL SHADY ♪

♪ ALL YOU OTHER SLIM SHADYS ARE JUST IMITATING ♪

♪ SO WON'T THE REAL SLIM SHADY PLEASE STAND UP ♪

♪ PLEASE STAND UP, PLEASE STAND UP? ♪

♪ 'CAUSE I'M SLIM SHADY, YES I'M THE REAL SHADY ♪

♪ ALL YOU OTHER SLIM SHADYS ARE JUST IMITATING ♪

♪ SO WON'T THE REAL SLIM SHADY PLEASE STAND UP ♪

♪ PLEASE STAND UP, PLEASE STAND UP? ♪

HA HA, I GUESS THERE'S A SLIM SHADY IN ALL OF US

LET'S ALL STAND UP