– English Lyrics

Lyrics & Translation

[English]

[Music]

[Applause]

[Music]

what happened I don't know you fell

asleep that is all yeah yeah

yeah all right well uh I better go yeah

I think that would be

best all right I'll talk to you later

okay but not about this no never

never so uh

uh bye no touch no

[Music]

touch hey just uh brought back your

videos uh hey uh Ross look uh I think we

need to talk about before no no we

don't yes we do now look that was the

best nap I ever

had I I don't know what you're talking

about come on admit it that was the best

nap you ever

had I've had

better okay

when all right all right it was the best

M ever ever I said it okay but it's over

Joey I want to do it

again we can't do it again why not

because it's

weird

fine you want something to drink sure

what do you got warm milk and exed pm

[Applause]

boy I'll tell you that judging stuff

took a lot out of me yeah yeah think

about maybe going upstairs and Tak a

little nap on my

couch why why would I care about

that no reason I'm just saying that

uh that's where I'll be

[Applause]

[Music]

great nap it really was

[Applause]

dude what the hell are you

doing excuse me

I'm so sorry you guys I didn't mean to

bring you down no you were

right I don't have a

plan pizza guy thank

God phab what do you have a plan I don't

even have a PL

[Music]

hey hun would you help me get the plates

down yeah hey here's an idea why don't

we use our wedding China today I think

we should save our China for something

really special like if the Queen of

England comes

over honey she keeps cancelling on us

take the

hint what if something gets broken

they're so expensive what is the point

of having them if we never use

them okay but if something gets broken

and then the queen comes over I will

explain it to her oh yeah like I'm going

to let you talk to the queen

W the parade is really good this

year man those horses can

crap next up is a marching band from MSI

Oklahoma MSI that's like 4 hours from

Tulsa

woohoo and here's the float with the

stars of the popular daytime soap Days

of Our

Lives oh my

God aren't you one of the stars that

popular daytime soap Days of Our Lives

yeah

I forgot I'm supposed to be

there I can't believe I forgot I usually

write stuff like this down on my

arm oh stupid long

sleeves what are you going to do I guess

I'm going to have to come up with a

really good reason why I wasn't there

the producers are going to be so mad at

me they sat us all down yesterday and

said everyone has to be there 6: a.m.

sharp that means you

trivani like I was some kind of idiot

well you prove them

[Music]

wrong hey who's this little naked guy uh

that little naked guy would be

me look at the little thing

yes yeah it's fine that is my

penis can we be grown-ups

now who are those people got me oh

that's Nana right there there in the

middle wow yeah let's see me and the

Gang at Java

Joe's wow Monica you look just like your

grandmother how old was she there

1939 yeah uh 24 25 huh it's like a fun

gang oh look look look look look I got

Monica naked

no no that would be me

again I'm uh just trying something hello

my name is

Clunkers may I please stay with you nice

people oh I wish you could stay here but

Chandler is allergic extremely allergic

okay if I am anywhere near a dog for

more than 5 minutes my throat will just

close up that's odd cuz this dog's been

living here for the past 3

days

really tandler if the dog has been here

that long and you haven't had a reaction

maybe you're not allergic to this dog

well it still has to go right

why okay it's um don't do

it don't do what I have to okay it's

time

okay I hate dogs what

CRA told

you all right okay be

careful careful watch her hair watch her

hair right she's got like three hair I

know I know but they're just so

beautiful oh my God I just pulled one

out

I promise you she's safe okay now watch

watch how much she loves this okay are

you ready s here we

go okay

careful okay

oh oh oh she's

smiling oh look at that she does like it

see I told you oh

oh oh my God look at her she's a little

dear devil oh god oh let me push can I

push oh

absolutely oh God okay get get the

camera it's in the it's in the diaper

bag okay see scared of the swings I bet

you feel pretty

silly so how's the game I have no

idea what yeah I'm just pretending to

watch the game so I don't have to help

out with

stuff I don't believe you that is is

brilliant and Monica has no idea nope

every once in a while I just yell and

scream stuff at the

TV

hey is your team winning hun oh yeah

Anderson just scored

again there's no

Anderson down the

street goats

operating leaving little

treats I don't know does it even work

without my sexy voice I like

it dther kiss

[Applause]

me and I'm still waiting for my paper my

man thank you my babies

Rachel

yeah I don't know if you heard about

what happened between me and Phoebe the

other day no well we kissed I I didn't

initiate the kiss but but I also didn't

stop it and I've been feeling

guilty okay so

um are we cool

okay I knew you would understand Janice

likes to cuddle at night which you know

I'm all for but uh you know when you

want to go to sleep you want some space

so uh you know how do I tell her that

without you know accidentally calling

her fat or

something oh honey I'm sorry we can't

help you there cuz we're cuddly

sleepers okay I'm laid for work oh all

right are you guys going to come down uh

yeah yeah I'll I'm right behind you okay

good luck Chandler thank you Rachel bye

sweetie bye

honey okay the sleeping

thing very tricky business but there is

something you can do I thought you guys

were cudly sleepy

no no not cuddly not me just her I'm

like you I need the

room okay come

here okay you're in B

yeah I'm going to use the cushion

yeah okay you're in bed she's over on

your side cuddling now you wait for her

to drift off and then you hug her and

roll her over to her side of the

bed and then

you roll away

hug for

her roll for

you okay the old hug and roll yeah okay

one question shoot you're pretending the

pillow's a girl

right what I'm going to do about this

coat I'll take

it that might work oh yeah

all right what do you think you're on in

five Miss

Manelli no no no it's it's just a bit

sudden no it's great okay I am totally

on board I love you too all right

bye what's the matter Ross nothing no oh

uh actually great news um just got off

the phone with Emily and looks like I'm

moving to a new

apartment wo

w why well her thought is and I agree

fresh new

furniture why not a fresh new apartment

her cousin has this great place to

sublet it's got a view of the river on

one side and Columbia on the other

that's way up town that's like three

trains away which is great I love to

ride that rail oh my God the pages are

stuck together Chandler

[Laughter]

oh my God she she made half an English

trifle

and half a shepherd's

pie

M yeah this is so good that I'm going to

go enjoy it on the

balcony so I can enjoy the view whilst I

enjoy my

dessert I'm going to call my friend Mary

and tell her how good this is from

Monica's room I'll help you

dial and I'm going to go into the

bathroom so I can look at it in the

mirror as I eat

it okay now what was that all about is

it does it not taste good let me try

this no

[Laughter]

no oh

fun so

good maybe janler has some

left that tastes like

feet I like

it are you kidding what's not the like

custard good Jam good meat good

so a bird just grabbed it and

then and then tried to fly away with it

and and then just dropped it on the

street yes but if it's any consolation

before the bird dropped it he seemed to

enjoy it this adoption stuff is so

overwhelming there's intercountry

adoption dependency adoption there so

many ways to go and this is like the

biggest decision of Our Lives there's a

hair in my

coffee hey guys hey hey have you seen

Frank Jor cuz he's meeting me here with

the triplets you know it's funny every

time you say triplets I immediately

think of three hot blonde

19-year-olds that's sweet drink your

hair hey what's all this stuff uh they

brochures from different adoption

agencies oh babies oh this one is so

cute get this

one that's not really how it works oh

how does it to work I don't

know well if you're having a hard time

you should talk to my friends Bill and

Colleen they adopted a kid I'm sure

they'd help you thanks that would be

great hey honey wouldn't that be

great popular feebe in tennis is called

the overhand

Phoebe and if you win you must slap your

opponent on the Phoebe and say hi

Phoebe oh that's cute we really all

enjoyed it but you know it doesn't count

count for what just count in our heads

as good Mad

Libs I guess

over wait wait guys if we follow the

rules it's still fun and it means

something I'm going to take off guys

rules are good rules help control the

fun the longest you've been in a

relationship

before H having having the sex

why who's not having are you and Julie

not are you and are you and Julie not

having

sex

technically no

wow is is it cuz she's so cold and

bad or or is it cuz she's like kind of

bossy makes it feel like

School no no she's great and it's not

like we haven't done anything I mean I

mean we we do plenty of other stuff lots

of other stuff like no no no no don't

need to know the

details okay no it's just it's it's me

you you know I've only been with one

woman my whole life and she turned out

to be a

lesbian so now I've got myself all

psyched out you know and it's become

like

this this thing and

I you know you must just think I'm weird

no no no no I don't think it's weird I

think I think um in fact in fact you

know what I think

what I think it's

sexy sexy let me tell you something as a

woman there is nothing sexier than a man

who does not want to have

sex no kidding oh yeah in fact you know

what I'd do what I'd

wait you wait yes absolutely I would

wait and

wait then I'd wait some

more really oh yeah I don't care how

much she tells you she wants it I don't

care if she begs she pleads she tells

you she she's going to have sex with

with another man that just means it's

working a women really want this more

than jewelry

hey I need you to set me up for a joke

later when Monica's around I need you to

ask me about fire trucks I don't know

Chan I'm not so good with remembering

lines well thank God you're live lihood

doesn't depend on I know

right why why why why are we doing this

Monica says that her matri D is the

funniest guy she's ever met seriously

she actually said that yes am I crazy to

be this upset no being funny is your

thing yeah without that you just got

lame with women

yeah hi there you are fire

trucks treat oh

oh well you're just the prettiest

ballerina I've ever seen thank

you oh wow that deserves another piece

of candy thank

you well I have to say that earns Tut

two pieces of

candy I love you oh oh

oh oh honey here take it all

[Applause]

Monica we need more candy what there's

only been like four kids yeah I know but

one of them just said that she loved me

so I just gave her

everything no wonder you're

pregnant I not told you oh I don't know

um how about the fact that the underwear

out there on the telephone pole is yours

from when you were having sex with fun

Bobby out on the Terrace what wait a

minute who told you

you are dead meat I didn't know it was a

big

secret oh it's not big not at all you

know kind of on the same lines as say oh

I don't know having a third

nipple you have a third

nipple you

whip it out whip it out yeah yeah

come on there's nothing to see it's just

a tiny bump it's totally useless oh as

opposed to your other multifunctional

nipples I can't believe you you told me

it was a

nubbin joy what do you think a nubbin

was I don't know you see something you

hear a word I thought that's what it was

I've just never had a relationship with

that kind of passion you know where

where you have to have somebody right

there in the middle of a theme

park well it was the only to do there

that didn't have a

line all right well see I mean Barry

wouldn't even kiss me on a miniature

golf course come on no you said we were

holding up the people behind

us and you didn't marry him

because I mean do you think there are

people that go through life never having

that kind of probably really but but you

know I'll tell you something passion is

way overrated yeah right it is uh

eventually it kind of burns out but

hopefully what you're left with is trust

and security and uh well in the case of

my ex-wife

lesbianism the airplane game you want to

show Rachel come here you going to do

something fun okay

[Music]

[Music]

so brave you're so brave yes you are

you're so brave okay okay honey he's

fine he's fine let's just put him down

come here babe yes you're such a good

boy how could you do that to him Ross

trusted me what is he going to say he's

not going to say anything because we're

not going to tell him we're not no we're

not all right I like

that so we're okay we're okay we're okay

aren't we no we're not okay we're not

okay there's a bump there's a bump

there's a bu oh my god well push it in

push it in I cannot push it

in okay we're going to need a

distraction okay that's it okay I got it

okay the second that Ross walks in that

door yeah I want you to take him back to

your bedroom and you do whatever it is

that you do that makes him

[Music]

go

or we could put a hat on his head a hat

yes we need a hat we need a hat where

are we going to find a tiny little hat w

w w get rainy J bear I guess he don't

know what to

do oh my God you're a genius oh God it's

it's kind of sewn on though give it give

it

okay oh it's just like a blood bath in

here today you

guys sure have a lot of books about

being a

lesbian well you know yeah you have to

take a

course otherwise they don't let you do

it

hey hey yle the turtle a classic

actually I I'm reading it to the

baby the uh the baby that hasn't been

born

yet um wouldn't that mean you're

crazy what you don't think they can hear

sounds in

there you're not serious I mean do yeah

you really you really talk to it yeah

all the time I want the baby to know my

voice do you uh do you talk about me

yeah yeah all the time really but um we

just refer to you as Bobo the sperm

guy here for Thanksgiving I know it's

sick why is it sick because it's

Richard's son it's it's like inviting a

Greek tragedy over for

dinner hey come on ph you understand

don't you yeah I could see where I'd be

your best shot but

no sorry honey I think it's twisted yeah

what's Twisted me going out with Richard

son

ew ew ew

ew sounds like a really bad idea to

me is he okay in there he's fine

hey you know man if things work out

between you and Richard's son you'll be

able to tell your kids that you slept

with your

grandfather fine judge all you want to

but married a lesbian left a man at the

altar fell in love with a gay ice dancer

threw a girl's wooden leg in the fire

live in a

box hey guys hey

so what do you think

about what what yeah what are you

kidding okay I'll give you a hint I'll

give you a

hint eyes no no your eyes no Chandler's

eyes I got

glasses you always had

glasses no I

didn't are you

sure yeah did didn't you use to have a

pair they were really round and burgundy

and they made you look kind of um

feminine

yes no sweetie I think the glasses look

great they make you look really sexy

really yeah and you didn't think I used

to wear glasses right of

course so

[Music]

nice hey I have a

question well uh actually actually not

so much a question as more of a a

general

wondering okay

okay here it

goes um well for a while now I've been

wanting to um oh yes yes that's that's

right little

girl

what top of the world looking down on

creation

[Applause]

[Music]

and all right this is just vacine it

won't

hurt ow ow sorry that was

wax this poor little toti is scared to

death we should find his owner oh we

just put the poor little toti out in the

hall

during a blackout so get trampled

yeah decided to have a Halloween party

good yeah and everybody has to wear

costumes come on it'll be fun well uh

I'll be there I mean I have to wear a

costume to all my classes that day

anyway so please tell me you're not

going to dress up like a

dinosaur not two years in a

row I I'll come to the part but I'm not

dressing up you have to no way look

Halloween is so stupid dressing up and

pretending to be someone you're

not you're an

actor so Ross are you going to bring

Mona yeah yeah I think I will the hot

girl from their wedding yeah well hey if

she needs any ideas for costumes she

could be a uh bikini model or

nurse or sexy cheerleader or o

Leatherface from Texas Chainsaw Massacre

no no no leather

face now wasn't Joey hitting on her at

the wedding

too that's right he was hitting on her

and I got her I guess the better man

won please don't take her from me do I'm

doing okay I think it's going well do

you think they're having fun am I

talking too fast nope sound like me D is

going great look at Chandler with little

baby girl

Chandler little baby girl Chandler where

have I heard that before all right coach

ran you know what PHS uh when you're

done over there we've got a kind of

situation over here

too nuh-uh no we are all responsible for

our own babies see that's where I think

that you're wrong we've been playing

these babies manto man we should really

be playing a zone

defense mean I just think things will go

a lot smoother if we each have our own

Zone you know Phoebe you can be in

charge of wiping

and you know M you can be in charge of

diapering and I can be in charge of

looking how cute they are when they put

their hands

[Music]

around that sounds really great but

maybe you should be in charge of wiping

okay I'm a rookie I should not be in the

end zone

[Music]

a

you know Rachel funny thing actually uh

The End Zone starts that pole so you're

5T short so we

[Applause]

win wait wait wait wait wait so explain

something to me though if if nobody

tagged Rachel then isn't the place still

going coffee we'll get energized and

we'll head back out

all right

okay so we're having fun right we don't

need that wizard guy we hit a couple of

clubs talk to some strangers and uh

after this we'll go down to the docks

and see about that boat

thing I'm kind of

beaked

actually me

too you serious yeah yeah thank God I'm

exhausted

so you guys want coffees yeah but uh I

don't want to be up too late so I'll

have a Decap yeah me

too actually can I get some hot water

with a little

lemon I strain my voice screaming in

there does it have to be so

loud I can't hear a word you're saying

my ears are ringing so bad I'm just glad

I brought that extra Paris socks you

know I used them as mittens I didn't

want to touch a thing in that last place

how sad are

we yeah I

know you know what we're not sad we're

not sad we're just not 21 anymore you

know I'm 29 years old damn it and I want

to sit in a comfortable chair and watch

television and go to sleep at a

reasonable hour yeah yeah and I like to

hang out in a quiet place where I could

talk to my friends yeah and so what if I

like to go home throw on some Kenny G

and take a bath

we're 29 we're not women oh

TBS what's wrong with PBS oh what's

right with

them why don't you like PBS fee okay cuz

right after my mom killed herself I was

just in this really bad place you know

personally

so I just thought that it would make me

feel better if I wrode to Sesame Street

cuz they were so nice when I was a

little

kid no one ever wrote back well you know

a lot of those Muppets don't have

thumbs all I got was a lousy keychain

and by that time I was living in a box I

didn't have

keys I'm sorry fees I just you know I

just wanted to do a good deed like like

you did with the babies this isn't a

good deed you just want to get on TV

this is totally selfish whoa whoa

whoa what about you having those babies

for your brother talk about

selfish what what do you what are you

talking about well yeah it was a really

nice thing and all but it made you feel

really good right yeah so well it made

you feel good so that makes it selfish

look there's no unselfish Good Deeds

sorry yes there are there are totally

Good Deeds that are selfless well may I

ask for one example yeah it's you know

there's no you may

not that's because all people are

selfish are you calling me selfish are

you calling you

people yeah sorry to burst that bubble

feeds but selfless Good Deeds don't

exist okay and you know the deal on

Santa Claus right I'm going to find a

selfless Good Deed I'm going to beat you

you Evil

Genius huh Dr Bobby happens to be an

excellent doctor oh wait a minute his

name is Dr

Bobby well that's his last name and his

first name he's Bobby Bobby

it's Robert

Bobby and um excuse me he helps me

please ask her how what do you need help

for with my alignment I got one leg

shorter than the other oh my God argue

with that what it's true my right leg is

2 Ines shorter come on you're just

tilting her legs are fine I know that so

what do you let her go to a chiropractor

for I'm sorry let her what can I do she

doesn't listen to me about uh about

renters Insurance either wait a minute

you don't have renters

insurance

no but what if somebody steals something

how you going to run after him with one

leg shorter than the

other hey would you uh would you like

some juice I love some juice

okay wow this is going so well did you

see us did you see yeah honey I'm

standing right there

why don't you just tell him about the M

I haven't gotten checked yet excellent

please help me I have a date tonight it

has to go well okay I'm scared for my

health okay okay um oh oh oh I got

something okay it's this story that I

came up with very romantic I swear any

woman that hears it they're like putty

really well then tell it to me okay now

you're going to want to have sex with me

when you hear it but you have to

remember it is just the story

I'll try to control

myself

okay years ago when I was backpacking

across Western Europe you were

backpacking across Western Europe have a

nice six more months Ross okay okay okay

I'm sorry please please you you were in

Western Europe

and I was just outside of Barcelona

hiking in the foothills of Mount

tibidabo

I was at the end of this path and I came

to a clearing and there was a lake very

secluded and there were tall trees all

around it was dead silent

gorgeous and across the lake I saw a

beautiful woman bathing

herself but she was

crying why

this is great wine it's from

France in

Europe Western

Europe you know um a few years ago uh

actually I was backpacking across

Western Europe really mhm wait it gets

[Laughter]

better um yeah I was in um Barcelona I

studied for a year in

Barcelona anyway um so I was um I was

hiking I love hiking oh that's

great I was hiking along the foothills

of Mount Tibido I think it's tibidabo

okay do you want to tell the story phes

who else wants one of my special

homemade brownies I will have one oh oh

yeah I'm not gonna have one of

those no no it's just my tooth all I'll

have one of

those so what's the matter you need a

dentist I've got a good one oh thanks I

have a good one too I just I I I can't

see him see that is the problem with

invisible

dentists why why can't you go to them

because every time I go to the dentist

somebody

dies that is so weird because every time

I go to the dentist I look down the

hygienist

blouse Phoebe what um what yeah yeah

first there was my Aunt Mary and then

there was um John my mailman and then my

my cowboy friend albino

Bob and all of these people actually

died yes while I was in the chair that's

why I take such good care of my teeth

now you know it's not about oral hygiene

I flossed to save

lives PHS come on you didn't kill

anybody these people just happen to die

when you went to the dentist it's it's

just a coincidence well tell that to

them oh you can't they're dead also just

so you know I'm not going to make a

turkey this year what well Phoebe

doesn't eat turkey

Phoebe turkeys are beautiful intelligent

animals no they're not they're ugly and

stupid and

delicious right it's it's not just

Phoebe Will's still on a diet Chandler

doesn't eat Thanksgiving food and

Rachel's having her averse into poultry

she is yeah did you remember I had to

leave the room the other day when you

had that roast chicken yeah but I

thought that was just cuz I put the

whole thing on my hand and made it walk

across the

table anyway it just doesn't seem worth

it to make a whole turkey for just three

people okay it's just it's it's a lot of

work but you got to have turkey on

Thanksgiving I mean Thanksgiving with no

turkey is like like Fourth of July with

no apple pie or or Friday with no two

pizzas all right fine if it means that

much to you but just there's going to be

a ton left over no no no there won't I

promise I will finish that

turkey you're telling me you can eat

almost an entire turkey in one sitting

that's right cuz I'm a

triani this is what we

do I mean we may not be great thinkers

or or world leaders we don't read a lot

or run very fast but damn it we can eat

everybody sh uh Central Perk is proud to

present the music of Miss Phoebe

[Applause]

bouet thanks hi um I want to start with

a song that's about that moment when you

suddenly realize what life is really all

about okay here we

[Music]

go okay thank you very much New York

City has no power and the milk is

getting sour but to me it is not scary

cuz I stay away from

[Music]

dairy hi guys this is Josh Josh these

are my friends that's

Rossy Josh hi

dudes so did you play in college oh I

still do next year I hope to make

Varsity though

Ross didn't you play uh soccer in high

school oh no wait that's right you just

organized their game schedules on your

Commodore

64 well it's getting late I got to get

to the game so I'm going to head

okay I'll miss

you

dope wow cute one very cute I know isn't

he great so nice to finally be in a fun

relationship you know there's nothing

boring about him and uh Betty's never

even set foot in a museum well maybe

he'll get to go soon you know like on a

class trip or

something you know what else is really

great about him oh what is the word for

an adult who doesn't have dinosaur toys

in their

bedroom um

what was that Monica knows it's this

dumb thing that Ross made up to trying

to fool our parents it's a way of giving

the finger without actually having to

give

it I remember I cried the night you made

that up this is the first time I

realized I was cooler than my big

brother I've got three of my five three

of your five what celebrities I'm

allowed to sleep with oh my God you are

giving us a lot of thought hey it's hard

okay I only have two spots left all

right who you got to narrow down to

okay Elizabeth Hurley very attractive

yeah

forgiving Susan

sandon you know what she's too political

she probably wouldn't let you do it

unless you donated four cans of food

first and Isabella rosolini very hot

very sexy but uh

you know she's too International you

know she's never going to be around so

so you got to play the odds pick

somebody who's going to be in the

country like all the

time yeah cuz that's why you won't get

Isabella rosellini

Geography okay let's see okay the

turkeyy in the oven the stuffing is

ready you know you always cook this meal

all by yourself let me help this year a

Chandler that's sweet but you don't have

to do everything Dr Phil tells you to

do I'm serious let me do something

something just not the turkey or the

stuffing nothing

high-profile let's see oh the cranberry

sauce it's easy to make and no one

really cares about

it tell me more okay I'm going to go

check on something across the hall you

start by washing

these not with

salt you obviously haven't Taste of my

palm Olive

potatoes well if we learned one thing

today ch it's that cheerleaders and high

explosives don't

mix you couldn't play that again MC well

I couldn't have done it without you

buddy you're a genius oh yeah well then

how come I can't get my VCR through stop

linking

[Laughter]

[Music]

12:00 so what do you guys

think hey

H hold on please Jo it's your mom mom

mom nice wow so what did you

think

well that was um okay it wasn't the best

that was one of the worst things

ever and not just on

TV what are we going to tell him well

the the lighting was okay oh no you

don't you got lighting last time

lighting is mine I have costumes oh

great that means I'm stuck with so we

were watching you in there and you were

sitting right here

whoa hey what's the matter somebody on

the subway licked my neck licked my neck

oh Wily is still

alive what are you guys doing oh my mom

called they're going to run our

engagement announcement in the local

paper so they're looking for a good

picture of us ooh I'm afraid that does

not

exist that's not true they're great

pictures of us no they are great

pictures of you standing next to a guy

who's going like

this oh my God that's the creep that

you're with at the Statue of

Liberty I don't know what it is I just

can't take a good picture here's a great

one yeah I'm not in that no but look at

me all

tan he why don't you guys go get

portraits done by a professional

photographer it's a great idea I bet

they have one of those wind machines you

know

like yeah that's great next to that

Chandler won't look so

stupid jander what do you say all right

but I should warn you I'm not going I'm

[Applause]

[Music]

going great that's great Monica

great now Chandler you want to give us a

smile

okay I'm sorry is the seat uncomfortable

no I am

there I know you can do this okay you

have a beautiful smile I do

yeah all right maybe you don't have to

smile let's try something else let's try

um try looking sexy

okay or

not I know let's try a look a far off

wonderment okay we'll we'll gaze into

our future and we'll think about our

marriage and the days to come

okay Chandler what is the matter with

your

face wait this picture supposed to say

Geller and being to be married not Local

woman saves drowning

hey don't laugh at him he's my

drowning

that's it that's take it take

it I like this one it seems to say I

love you and that's why I have to kill

you can't all be bad find the one where

you make your bedroom

eyes oh there it is oh my God those are

my bedroom

eyes why did you ever sleep with

me do you really want to pull at that

thread see that's a great smile easy

natural now pretend I have a

camera are you changing it I can't help

it all right all right all right all

right right you want to know what I do

when I take resume shots borrow money

from

me yeah okay first first of all you want

to make it look spontaneous right okay

so here's what I do I look down look

down keep looking down then I look

up see all right now you try look down

you're looking down keep looking down

why is the jelly on your

shoe I had a

[Music]

donut hey there you are there I

am you okay yeah Joey said I uh I needed

to relax so he gave me an

antihistamine yeah and I fell asleep on

the subway and went all the way to

Brooklyn Brooklyn is

far jaylor what were you thinking no no

but don't worry don't worry because I

know how to take a picture

now okay see look

down look

down look

[Music]

down Chandler yeah

guys check it out my mom sent me the

paper oh let's see it

okay oh yeah that looks good you guys

make a very attractive

couple yeah we look great together we

really do

okay wow imagine what our kids would

look like you know we don't have to

imagine I'm marrying her well just see

hey

hey what are you supposed to be remember

the Russian satellite

Sputnik well I'm a potato or a

spud and these are my

antenna so Sputnik

becomes spudnick spudnick

wow I don't have the worst costume

anymore hey right Ross came is

Duty no I'm I'm not Duty no space

[Laughter]

Duty hey what are you guys what are you

guys talking about

nothing damn this coffee is cold hey

Rich do you mind if I heat this up on

your loin

you know I cannot believe you told him

Joey so I guess you bought that book

after we broke up huh uh-huh yeah I did

because I wore out my first copy when I

was with

you oh yeah yeah well uh when we were

going out I read tons of porno

magazines

so boss how could you do that to an old

man

excuse me

[Music]

ladies hey hey Ross check it out Sandy

taught me Hot Cross

Buns really sounded like three blind

mice no Three Blind Mice goes like this

I swear to God

who's up for puppets me I'm up for

puppets well please

welcome the snuffle bumps who wants to

be Mr wiggle Munch and who's going to be

the grumpies okay okay how exactly is a

two-month-old supposed to appreciate

puppets actually Studies have shown that

the movement and colors helped their

cerebral development the Whimsical

characters are just for us

I want to be Mr wiggle

Munch oh my god well I guess we know

who's going to be the grumpus

[Music]

Key Vocabulary

Vocabulary	Meanings
nap /næp/ A1	noun - a short sleep, especially during the day
exhausted /ɪɡˈzɔː.stɪd/ B2	adjective - extremely tired; having used up all energy
allergic /əˈlɜː.dʒɪk/ B2	adjective - having an allergic reaction; sensitive to a substance
parade /pəˈreɪd/ B1	noun - a public procession, especially one celebrating a special day
costume /ˈkɒs.tjuːm/ A2	noun - a set of clothes worn to represent a particular character or period
cuddle /ˈkʌd.əl/ A2	verb - to hold someone close in one's arms for comfort or affection
sublet /ˈsʌb.lɛt/ B2	verb - to lease a property that one is already renting to another person
adoption /əˈdɒp.ʃən/ B1	noun - the act of legally taking another child's status as one's own
trifle /ˈtraɪ.fəl/ B2	noun - a light dessert made with fruit, sponge cake, and custard; also a thing of little importance
antihistamine /ˌæn.tiˈhɪs.tə.miːn/ B2	noun - a drug that reduces or blocks the effects of histamine, used to treat allergies
nipple /ˈnɪp.əl/ B1	noun - the small projecting part of the breast from which milk can be drawn
laughter /ˈlɑːf.tər/ A2	noun - the action or sound of laughing
marriage /ˈmær.ɪdʒ/ B1	noun - the legal or formal union of two people as partners in a personal relationship
couch /kaʊtʃ/ A2	noun - a piece of furniture for sitting or lying down, typically for several people
bump /bʌmp/ B1	noun - a light blow or a raised area caused by a collision
fancy /ˈfæn.si/ B1	adjective - elaborate or decorative; also, having a particular liking
baby /ˈbeɪ.bi/ A1	noun - a very young child; also used affectionately for a loved one
glasses /ˈɡlæs.ɪz/ A2	noun - a pair of lenses set in a frame, worn to correct or protect the eyes