Nice car.
00:03
00:04
>> Yeah, it's uh it's not mine.
00:04
00:09
>> I love your car.
00:09
00:10
>> Yeah, it's mine.
00:10
00:13
[laughter]
00:13
00:13
>> I bet it's fast.
00:13
00:15
>> Me, too. Yeah.
00:15
00:17
And comfortable. Do you uh you like
00:17
00:20
leather seats?
00:20
00:21
>> Yeah.
00:21
00:24
>> It's got them.
00:24
00:29
Yeah, she tops out at 130.
00:29
00:32
>> Wow. And that's just in the city. I get
00:32
00:34
her up to 160 when I take her upstate.
00:34
00:37
>> Really?
00:37
00:38
>> You got a place up state?
00:38
00:39
>> Sure.
00:39
00:42
>> Well, uh, I'll see you later. Okay, take
00:42
00:44
it easy.
00:44
00:47
>> Hey,
00:47
00:48
that's my car.
00:48
00:50
>> Really? Oh. Uh, but just give me five
00:50
00:53
more minutes with it.
00:53
00:56
What? What are you doing? Oh, well, I uh
00:56
00:58
I found the keys and now I'm just
00:58
00:59
polishing her up.
00:59
01:01
>> But it's my car.
01:01
01:02
>> Yeah, but it's my wax.
01:02
01:05
>> Listen, I don't come to this city much
01:05
01:08
and I don't know if you're crazy or if
01:08
01:10
this is some kind of street theater, but
01:10
01:14
could I have my keys?
01:14
01:15
>> Sure. Here.
01:15
01:16
>> I'll uh I'll save your parking spot.
01:16
01:18
>> Not coming back.
01:18
01:20
>> Why not?
01:20
01:21
>> I live upstate.
01:21
01:23
>> Yeah, so did I. [laughter]
01:23
01:30
So, the Porsche guy took his car back.
01:30
01:34
[laughter]
01:34
01:36
>> But you found the keys to his clothes.
01:36
01:38
[laughter]
01:38
01:40
>> No, I just uh I just love the way it
01:40
01:43
feels when everybody thinks I own a
01:43
01:44
Porsche.
01:44
01:44
>> And people would think you own a Porsche
01:44
01:46
because you're wearing the clothes.
01:46
01:47
>> Of course, [laughter] only an idiot
01:47
01:50
would wear this stuff if you didn't have
01:50
01:51
the car, right?
01:51
01:54
>> [laughter]
01:54
01:56
>> That is true.
01:56
01:59
>> Yeah, but only a genius would swallow a
01:59
02:01
sonic blaster gun.
02:01
02:03
>> Oh, I've been there.
02:03
02:07
>> I am going to go drive my Porsche.
02:07
02:10
>> Joey, you know you don't actually have
02:10
02:12
one.
02:12
02:13
>> Come on. What are you doing? I'm in
02:13
02:14
character. Will you talk to her?
02:14
02:18
>> Hey, hey, hey, careful around my porch.
02:18
02:24
Hi, Joey.
02:24
02:25
>> Hey, how you doing?
02:25
02:28
>> He has the most amazing Porsche under
02:28
02:31
there.
02:31
02:31
>> I'd love to show you, but I just tucked
02:31
02:33
her in. She's sleeping. [laughter]
02:33
02:36
>> Hey, uh, would you two girls like to go
02:36
02:37
for a drink?
02:37
02:42
>> We should all get dressed up and go to
02:42
02:44
have champagne at the plaza.
02:44
02:45
>> Oh, okay.
02:45
02:47
>> But I I I can't stay too long. I got to
02:47
02:49
get up early for a commercial audition
02:49
02:51
tomorrow and I got to look good.
02:51
02:53
Supposed to be playing a 19-year-old.
02:53
02:56
[laughter]
02:56
02:58
>> What? So, when you said get up early,
02:58
03:00
did you mean 1986?
03:00
03:04
[laughter]
03:04
03:04
>> You guys don't think I look 19?
03:04
03:09
>> Oh, 19. We thought you said 90.
03:09
03:15
>> Okay, everybody, let's go. Let's go.
03:15
03:16
>> Okay.
03:16
03:21
Oh my god.
03:21
03:24
[laughter]
03:24
03:28
[laughter]
03:28
03:31
>> Sup.
03:32
03:33
[laughter]
03:33
03:36
Sup, dude.
03:36
03:39
Take whatever you want. Just please
03:39
03:40
don't hurt me.
03:40
03:43
>> It's like playing a little PlayStation,
03:44
03:45
huh?
03:45
03:47
That's whack. [laughter]
03:47
03:50
PlayStation is whack. [laughter]
03:50
03:55
Sup with the whack. PlayStation sump.
03:55
03:58
[laughter]
03:58
03:59
Huh?
04:00
04:01
Come on. Am I 19 or what?
04:01
04:04
>> Yes. On a scale from 1 to 10, 10 being
04:04
04:07
the dumbest a person can look, you are
04:07
04:09
definitely 19. [laughter]
04:09
04:12
>> Come on, man. Really? How old?
04:12
04:14
>> Young. You're a manchild. Okay, now go
04:14
04:17
get changed because everybody's ready.
04:17
04:19
And please Oh, please keep my underwear.
04:19
04:22
[laughter]
04:22
04:23
>> Oh, thanks.
04:23
04:23
>> Okay,
04:23
04:25
>> now I can pass for 19, right?
04:26
04:29
>> Yes, you can pass for 19.
04:29
04:31
>> Really?
04:31
04:32
>> Yes.
04:32
04:33
>> Seriously? Seriously? Seriously? No.
04:33
04:36
Okay. You can play your own age, which
04:36
04:39
is 31.
04:39
04:41
[laughter]
04:41
04:43
I'm 30.
04:43
04:46
>> Joey, you are not. You're 31.
04:46
04:50
>> Oh crap.
04:50
04:52
>> Where's Chandler?
04:52
04:53
>> Uh, he can't make it. He said he had to
04:53
04:54
go back to his uh job and do uh Uhoh.
04:54
04:59
[laughter]
04:59
05:00
>> Joey.
05:00
05:03
>> Joey Tribani.
05:03
05:10
Joey, I can see you. Okay. You're hiding
05:10
05:12
behind the coats.
05:12
05:18
[laughter]
05:18
05:25
>> Close one.
05:25
05:28
>> Hey.
05:28
05:29
>> Hey. Hey.
05:29
05:29
>> Is uh is Chandler around?
05:29
05:31
>> Nope. Um he met some girl at the coffee
05:31
05:33
house.
05:33
05:34
>> Yeah.
05:34
05:35
>> Ginger something. No,
05:35
05:37
[laughter]
05:37
05:38
no, no. Uh, are you sure it wasn't
05:38
05:41
something that sounded like Ginger? Like
05:41
05:43
uh Ginger?
05:43
05:46
>> No, it was Ginger. I remember because
05:46
05:48
when he told me I said the movie star.
05:48
05:53
>> Oh man, that's the girl I was hiding
05:53
05:55
from. When she finds out he's my
05:55
05:57
roommate, she's going to tell him what I
05:57
05:59
did.
05:59
05:59
>> Well, what did you do?
05:59
06:00
>> Oh. Oh. Oh, no. No. I can't
06:00
06:04
I can't tell you that. Yeah, it's like
06:04
06:05
the most awful, horrible thing I've ever
06:05
06:07
done in my whole life.
06:07
06:08
>> You know what? Don't tell us. We'll just
06:08
06:10
wait till Junior gets home because it'll
06:10
06:11
be more fun that way.
06:11
06:12
>> All right.
06:12
06:15
Okay. It was like four years ago. Okay.
06:15
06:18
Ginger and I had gone out a few times.
06:18
06:20
And then this one weekend, we went up to
06:20
06:22
her dad's cabin. Just me, her, and her
06:22
06:25
annoying little dog, Pepper.
06:25
06:27
Well, that night, I cooked this really
06:27
06:29
romantic dinner.
06:29
06:30
>> You gave her food poisoning.
06:30
06:33
>> I wish.
06:33
06:34
[laughter]
06:34
06:35
After dinner, me, her, and Pepper all
06:35
06:37
fell asleep in front of the fire. Well,
06:37
06:39
I woke up in the middle of the night and
06:39
06:41
I saw that the fire was dying out. So, I
06:41
06:44
picked up a log and threw it on.
06:44
06:48
[laughter]
06:48
06:48
Or at least what I thought was a log.
06:48
06:50
>> Oh my god, you threw pepper on the fire.
06:50
06:53
[laughter]
06:53
06:54
>> I wish.
06:54
06:57
See, I guess another thing I probably
06:57
07:00
should have told you about Ginger is
07:00
07:01
that she kind of has a uh
07:01
07:04
artificial leg.
07:04
07:08
[laughter]
07:08
07:11
>> Oh my god.
07:12
07:14
Joey, what did you do after you threw
07:14
07:16
her leg on the fire?
07:16
07:19
>> I ran.
07:19
07:21
>> Go first.
07:21
07:22
>> Okay.
07:22
07:22
>> Okay. Okay. [applause]
07:22
07:28
Welcome to America.
07:28
07:35
>> All right.
07:35
07:38
>> Oh my gosh.
07:38
07:39
>> Two in a row. You got to use your
07:40
07:41
tongues now. [laughter]
07:41
07:51
>> What are the odds? What are the odds?
07:51
07:54
>> [applause]
07:54
07:55
>> Okay, that that's enough, you know. Let
07:55
07:58
let's let let someone else play.
07:58
08:01
[laughter]
08:01
08:02
>> If you didn't want to play, then why'd
08:02
08:03
you come to the party?
08:03
08:06
>> You got to pick a pocket
08:06
08:08
[music and singing] or two, boys.
08:08
08:12
You've got to pick a pocket for two.
08:12
08:22
>> Lovely. [laughter]
08:22
08:23
Just lovely.
08:23
08:25
>> Really? Thanks.
08:25
08:26
>> Listen, Joey, we definitely want to see
08:26
08:28
you for the call back on Saturday.
08:28
08:30
>> Excellent. [laughter]
08:30
08:32
>> I'll be there.
08:32
08:33
>> Okay. And listen, don't forget to bring
08:33
08:34
your jazz shoes for the dance audition.
08:34
08:40
>> Uhhuh. My uh my agent said that it
08:40
08:43
wasn't a dancing part.
08:43
08:45
>> Oh, Joey, all the roles got to dance a
08:45
08:47
little. But believe me, with your dance
08:47
08:49
background, it'll be a piece of cake.
08:49
08:51
Three years of modern dance with
08:51
08:52
Twilight Tharp.
08:52
08:55
[laughter]
08:55
08:56
>> Five years with the American Ballet
08:56
08:58
Theater.
08:58
09:00
[laughter]
09:00
09:00
>> Hey, everybody lies on their resume.
09:00
09:03
Okay. I wasn't one of the Zoom kids
09:03
09:05
either.
09:05
09:07
>> Well, can you like dance at all?
09:07
09:10
>> Yeah, I can dance, you know.
09:10
09:16
>> [cheering]
09:16
09:21
>> Oh, no. No, no, no. [laughter]
09:21
09:25
>> What? What is that?
09:25
09:26
>> Sure it looks stupid now. There's no
09:26
09:28
music playing.
09:28
09:33
[music]
09:33
09:35
[laughter]
09:35
09:36
>> Uh, Joey. Joey Tribani.
09:36
09:44
>> Listen, Joey. I got a problem. I just
09:44
09:46
got a call from my dance captain. He's
09:46
09:48
having a relationship crisis and can't
09:48
09:50
get out of Long Island.
09:50
09:51
>> So, does that mean the audition's off?
09:51
09:53
[laughter]
09:53
09:53
>> Listen, Joey. Seeing as you've got the
09:54
09:55
most experience,
09:55
09:57
>> I want you to take these dances and
09:57
09:59
teach them the combination.
09:59
10:01
[laughter]
10:01
10:02
>> Plus, oh, Joey, come on. It's easy. You
10:02
10:05
know, it's hand
10:05
10:08
head
10:08
10:10
up.
10:10
10:12
Big turn here. Ronda Jean
10:12
10:15
slide back step step and jazz hands.
10:15
10:22
>> It's a steppity step in jazz hands.
10:22
10:25
Have fun.
10:25
10:27
Bye.
10:27
10:32
All right, let's do it.
10:32
10:44
>> [cheering and applause]
10:44
10:52
>> No, no, no.
10:52
10:54
What was that? I know. It's the best I
10:54
10:57
could get out of him.
10:57
11:00
Well, people, people, people, people,
11:00
11:05
let's try it again. And this time, let's
11:05
11:07
everybody watch Joey. [laughter]
11:07
11:11
Show them how it's done.
11:11
11:16
[laughter]
11:16
11:18
>> Count it all back.
11:18
11:26
>> 85.
11:26
11:27
>> What do you mean? Yesterday you said I
11:27
11:29
was too pretty to pay for stuff.
11:29
11:31
>> It's just I can't because my manager
11:31
11:32
said that I
11:32
11:36
Happy birthday to you.
11:36
11:39
Happy birthday to you. Happy birthday,
11:39
11:43
dear Annie.
11:43
11:44
>> Amy.
11:44
11:45
>> Amy.
11:45
11:47
>> Happy birthday to you. Hey. Hey. That's
11:47
11:51
weird. Today's my birthday, too.
11:51
11:52
>> Yeah. Not in here. It is.
11:52
11:56
[cheering]
11:56
11:57
>> Happy birthday to you.
11:57
12:02
>> You're paying for that.
12:02
12:03
>> No. No. No. It's her birthday.
12:03
12:05
>> You've sung happy birthday to 20
12:05
12:06
different women today.
12:06
12:08
But it really
12:08
12:09
>> We're no longer authorized to distribute
12:09
12:11
birthday muffins.
12:11
12:13
[laughter]
12:13
12:14
>> Damn it.
12:14
12:15
>> We're going to take clunkers to Ross's.
12:15
12:17
We'll be back in a minute. Oh, wait.
12:17
12:19
Before you guys go, can I just ask you a
12:19
12:20
question?
12:20
12:21
>> Yeah.
12:21
12:21
>> Um, when a guy breaks up with his
12:21
12:23
girlfriend, what is an appropriate
12:23
12:24
amount of time to wait before you make a
12:24
12:27
move?
12:27
12:28
>> Oh, I'd say about a month.
12:28
12:30
>> Really? I'd say three to four.
12:30
12:32
>> Half hour.
12:32
12:34
[laughter]
12:34
12:37
Interesting.
12:37
12:39
>> When it's your assistant, I would say
12:39
12:41
never.
12:41
12:41
>> All right, Ra. The big question is, does
12:41
12:44
he like you? Right? Because if he
12:44
12:46
doesn't like you, this is all a moo
12:46
12:48
point.
12:48
12:50
[laughter]
12:50
12:51
>> Huh? A moo point?
12:51
12:56
>> Yeah. It's like a cow's opinion.
12:56
13:00
It just doesn't matter.
13:00
13:03
[laughter]
13:03
13:05
It's Moo.
13:05
13:10
[laughter]
13:10
13:13
>> Have I been living with him for too long
13:13
13:14
or did that all just make sense?
13:14
13:16
[laughter]
13:16
13:17
>> Please don't listen to Joey. Okay. Would
13:17
13:19
you look at him? I He's He's obviously
13:19
13:22
depressed. He's away from his family.
13:22
13:24
He's spending Thanksgiving with
13:24
13:25
strangers. What he needs right now is
13:25
13:26
for you to be his friend.
13:26
13:28
>> Oh, you're right. I'm sorry. Thank you.
13:28
13:31
Okay, that's what I'm going to do.
13:31
13:32
>> Fine. take their advice.
13:32
13:35
No one ever listens to me when the
13:35
13:37
package is this pretty. No one cares
13:37
13:39
what's inside.
13:39
13:40
>> Oh, I guess um good night.
13:40
13:43
>> Well, unless you uh unless you want to
13:43
13:46
hang around.
13:46
13:47
>> Yeah.
13:47
13:48
>> Yeah. I'll let you play with my duck.
13:48
13:51
[clears throat]
13:51
13:53
[music]
13:53
14:03
Hey,
14:03
14:07
stripper.
14:07
14:09
[laughter]
14:09
14:18
[music]
14:18
14:23
>> The stripper stole the ring. The
14:23
14:25
stripper stole the ring. Taylor, get up.
14:25
14:27
Get up. The stripper stole the ring.
14:27
14:30
>> What? The ring is gone.
14:30
14:33
Okay, just like give me a a minute to
14:33
14:35
wake up for this.
14:35
14:39
You lost the ring. You're the worst best
14:39
14:41
man ever.
14:41
14:43
>> Dude, this isn't funny. What am I going
14:43
14:45
to do? I go to sleep last night,
14:45
14:47
everything's cool. I wake up this
14:47
14:48
morning, the stripper's gone, and the
14:48
14:50
ring is gone.
14:50
14:51
>> You slept with the stripper?
14:51
14:52
>> Of course.
14:52
14:53
>> The airport, huh? You know that's over
14:53
14:55
30 miles. That's going to cost you about
14:55
14:58
so bucks. Excuse me. That's $50 bucks.
14:58
15:03
>> What?
15:03
15:04
>> $50.
15:04
15:06
>> Oh, you know what it is? It's smudgy cuz
15:06
15:09
they're fax pages. Now, when I was on
15:09
15:12
Days of Our Lives as Dr. Drake Remor,
15:12
15:15
they'd send over the whole script on
15:15
15:16
real paper and everything.
15:16
15:19
>> That's great. And and and just so you
15:19
15:21
know, if you wanted to expand this
15:22
15:23
scene, like like have the cab crash or
15:23
15:25
something, I could attend to the victims
15:25
15:27
cuz I have a background in medical
15:27
15:28
acting.
15:28
15:31
>> Okay, listen. Thanks for coming in.
15:31
15:32
>> No, no. Uh don't thank me for coming in.
15:32
15:35
Uh at least let me finish.
15:35
15:40
>> Uh we could take the expressway, but uh
15:40
15:43
this time of day you're better off
15:43
15:45
taking the budge.
15:45
15:49
You were going for the word bridge
15:50
15:51
there, weren't you?
15:51
15:53
>> I'll have a good day.
15:53
15:58
[laughter]
15:58
16:02
[laughter]
16:02
16:05
Very funny, Ross. Very lifelike and
16:05
16:08
funny. Okay. [laughter]
16:08
16:13
Oh, no, no, no, no. I I wasn't waving at
16:13
16:15
you, lady.
16:15
16:17
Whoa. Maybe I was.
16:18
16:20
>> Hey, Monica. This totally hot girl in
16:20
16:22
Ross' building is flirting with me.
16:22
16:24
>> Get in there, man. Flirt back. Mix it
16:24
16:26
up.
16:26
16:28
>> Yeah, I'm down with that.
16:28
16:31
[laughter]
16:31
16:32
>> Okay, here goes.
16:32
16:35
How
16:35
16:37
you
16:37
16:39
are doing?
16:39
16:42
[laughter]
16:42
16:43
It worked. She's waving me over. Okay,
16:43
16:46
I'll be right over. Let's see. She's on
16:46
16:47
the third floor.
16:48
16:50
>> Wow. She is pretty, huh?
16:50
16:52
>> Tell me about it. Huh?
16:52
16:54
Oh, no. No, no, no, no. I'm not with
16:54
16:57
her. No, that that's just Monica.
16:57
17:00
Joey Peponyi.
17:00
17:03
>> Oh, still too ethnic. My agent thinks I
17:03
17:05
should have a name that's more neutral.
17:05
17:07
Joey Switzerland.
17:07
17:13
Plus, you know, I think it should be
17:13
17:15
Joe. You know, Joey makes me sound like
17:15
17:17
um I don't know this big, which I'm not.
17:17
17:23
Joe
17:23
17:25
Stalin [snorts]
17:25
17:28
Stalin [laughter]
17:28
17:31
Stalin. Do I know that name? That sounds
17:31
17:33
familiar. Well, it does not ring a bell
17:33
17:35
with me.
17:35
17:37
Joe Stalin, [laughter]
17:37
17:42
you know, that's pretty good.
17:42
17:45
You might want to try Joseph.
17:45
17:54
>> Joseph Stalin.
17:54
17:56
>> I think you'd remember that.
17:56
17:58
>> Oh, yes. [laughter]
17:58
18:01
Bye-bye birdie starring Joseph Stalin.
18:01
18:04
Joseph Stalin is the fiddler on the
18:04
18:06
roof.
18:06
18:13
You know there already is a Joseph
18:13
18:15
Stalin. [laughter]
18:15
18:21
>> You're kidding.
18:22
18:24
>> Apparently he was this Russian dictator
18:24
18:26
who slaughtered all these people.
18:26
18:30
You'd think you would have known that.
18:30
18:32
You know, you'd think I would have.
18:32
18:35
>> Hey guys. Hey sweetie.
18:35
18:37
>> Ready to go?
18:37
18:37
>> Yeah, sure. Oh, I left my purse up at
18:37
18:39
Monica's. I'll be right back.
18:39
18:40
>> Wait a minute. Fun. Oh.
18:40
18:48
Whoa, that one kept going.
18:48
18:56
>> Wow. You and Phoebe, huh? How long you
18:56
18:58
been going out?
18:58
18:59
>> Over a month.
18:59
19:00
>> Wow. Maybe uh maybe you and I ought to
19:00
19:02
get to know each other a little better.
19:02
19:03
>> Sure, I'd like that.
19:03
19:05
>> Yeah. So, uh
19:05
19:08
what's your name?
19:08
19:12
It's Jake.
19:12
19:13
>> Joey.
19:13
19:14
>> Hey, Jake. Uh, do you like the Knicks?
19:14
19:16
>> Yeah, big fan.
19:16
19:17
>> Me, too. There's a game on Tuesday. You
19:17
19:20
want to go?
19:20
19:21
>> Yeah, that'd be great. Let me make sure
19:21
19:23
I'm not doing anything Tuesday
19:23
19:26
[laughter]
19:26
19:28
[music]
19:28
19:31
>> listen. You know how uh when you're
19:32
19:34
wearing pants and you lean forward, I
19:34
19:36
check out your underwear?
19:36
19:37
>> Yeah.
19:37
19:39
[laughter]
19:39
19:40
When Jake did it, I saw that he was
19:40
19:43
wearing women's underwear.
19:43
19:45
>> I know. They were mine.
19:45
19:48
>> Oh, [laughter]
19:48
19:51
no. No. Wait. That's weird.
19:51
19:54
>> No, it's not. We were just goofing
19:54
19:55
around and I dared him to try them on.
19:55
19:58
>> That's weird.
19:58
19:59
>> I'm wearing his briefs right now.
19:59
20:00
>> That's kind of hot.
20:00
20:03
>> I think so, too. And that little flap,
20:03
20:06
it's great for holding my lipstick.
20:06
20:09
>> [laughter]
20:09
20:14
>> Yeah, I wouldn't know about that.
20:14
20:17
>> And you know Jake says that women's
20:17
20:19
underwear is actually more comfortable
20:19
20:21
and he loves the way the silk feels
20:22
20:23
against his skin.
20:23
20:24
>> Yeah. Well, next thing you know, he'd be
20:24
20:26
telling you that your high heels are
20:26
20:27
good for his posture.
20:27
20:29
>> There is nothing wrong with Jake. Okay.
20:30
20:31
He is all man. I'm thinking even more
20:31
20:34
than you.
20:34
20:35
>> Oh yeah. He look like a real lumberjack
20:35
20:36
in those pink laces.
20:36
20:40
I'm just saying that only a man
20:40
20:42
completely secure with his masculinity
20:42
20:44
could walk around in women's underwear.
20:44
20:46
I don't think you could ever do that.
20:46
20:47
>> Hey, I am secure with my masculinity.
20:47
20:50
>> Okay, whatever.
20:50
20:52
>> You've seen my huge stack of porn,
20:52
20:53
right?
20:53
20:56
[music]
20:56
21:04
[laughter]
21:04
21:19
Yeah.
21:19
21:24
[laughter]
21:24
21:29
[laughter]
21:29
21:33
>> Hey, Feebs.
21:33
21:34
>> Hey,
21:34
21:37
Check it out.
21:37
21:40
>> Huh? [cheering]
21:40
21:44
>> How much of a man am I?
21:44
21:46
>> Wow. Nice. Manly and also kind of a
21:46
21:50
[laughter]
21:50
21:52
>> You know, I'm beginning to see what Jake
21:52
21:55
was talking about.
21:55
21:56
>> The silk feels really good.
21:56
21:59
>> Yeah. And and things aren't as smashed
21:59
22:02
down as I thought they were going to be.
22:02
22:04
It's great, Joe.
22:04
22:05
>> Yeah. And you have so many more choices
22:05
22:07
than you do with men's underwear.
22:07
22:08
Bikini, French cut, thong, and and the
22:08
22:11
fabrics. You got cotton, silk, lace, and
22:11
22:14
you know what? I've always wondered
22:14
22:15
about panty hoes.
22:15
22:18
You know, the way they start at your toe
22:18
22:19
and then they go all the way up to
22:19
22:22
[laughter]
22:22
22:25
>> I should go take these off, shouldn't I?
22:25
22:27
>> I think it's important that you do
22:27
22:31
>> feel better.
22:31
22:32
>> Yeah. much.
22:32
22:35
Listen, uh not that I'm insecure about
22:35
22:38
my manhood or anything, you know, but uh
22:38
22:42
I think I need to hook up with a woman
22:42
22:44
like right now.
22:44
22:45
>> Yeah, I understand.
22:45
22:46
>> Yeah. Okay.
22:46
22:53
>> Hey. Hi.
22:53
22:54
>> Hi.
22:54
22:55
>> You know, you look familiar. Do I know
22:55
22:56
you from somewhere?
22:56
22:58
>> I don't think so.
22:58
23:00
>> Maybe it's because I'm on television.
23:00
23:03
>> [laughter]
23:03
23:04
>> I'm an actor on Days of Our Lives.
23:04
23:06
>> Wow.
23:06
23:07
>> Really?
23:07
23:07
>> Mhm.
23:07
23:08
>> 450, please.
23:08
23:09
>> Oh, let me get this.
23:09
23:15
[laughter]
23:15
23:22
>> These are for you.
23:22
23:24
>> Hi, guys.
23:24
23:25
>> Hey.
23:25
23:26
>> Oh, what's in the bag?
23:26
23:27
>> Oh. Uh, well, you know how Emma started
23:27
23:29
crawling? I realized that this place is
23:29
23:31
very unsafe for a baby. So, I went to
23:31
23:34
the store and I got some stuff to baby
23:34
23:36
proof the apartment.
23:36
23:38
>> Oh god. Baby proofing. Why is this such
23:38
23:41
a big deal now? You know, when I was a
23:41
23:43
kid, it was like, "Whoops, Joey fell
23:43
23:45
down the stairs." Or, uh, "Whoops, Joey
23:45
23:48
electrocuted himself again." [laughter]
23:48
23:52
>> Anyway, um, are you going to get a
23:52
23:55
handyman to install this stuff?
23:55
23:56
>> No, I was just going to do it myself.
23:56
23:59
>> Yeah.
23:59
24:01
>> [laughter]
24:01
24:02
>> You're going to do it?
24:02
24:03
>> Yeah. Why? You don't think a woman can
24:03
24:06
do this?
24:06
24:07
>> Well, women can't. You can't.
24:07
24:11
>> Monica, will you please tell Joey that
24:11
24:13
he is a pig?
24:13
24:15
>> You're a pig and you can't do this.
24:15
24:18
>> What?
24:18
24:19
>> What? Come on. I found the hardware
24:19
24:21
store all by myself.
24:21
24:23
>> The hardware store is right down the
24:23
24:24
street.
24:24
24:25
>> There is a hardware store right down the
24:25
24:26
street.
24:26
24:29
>> [music]
24:29
24:30
>> Hi. So, you gave in and decided to call
24:30
24:33
someone?
24:33
24:33
>> Yeah, I don't know who I was kidding. I
24:34
24:36
can barely use chopsticks.
24:36
24:38
>> You're all set.
24:38
24:39
>> Oh, thank you so much. Oh. Oh, wait. You
24:39
24:42
uh forgot your um your game.
24:42
24:46
>> Thank you.
24:46
24:50
[music]
24:50
24:57
>> [laughter]
24:57
25:01
>> Ra.
25:01
25:02
[snorts]
25:02
25:06
[laughter]
25:06
25:10
Rachel.
25:10
25:12
[laughter]
25:12
25:18
[laughter]
25:18
25:23
[laughter]
25:23
25:25
So, I can't do anything I like.
25:25
25:30
[laughter]
25:30
25:34
I did it. I did it. All right.
25:34
25:43
[laughter]
25:43
25:44
Better take all I can carry.
25:44
25:48
Who knows when I'll be able to get in
25:48
25:49
here again, huh?
25:49
25:51
>> All right. I took the quiz and it turns
25:51
25:54
out I do put career before men.
25:54
25:56
[laughter]
25:56
25:59
>> Get up.
25:59
26:01
>> What?
26:01
26:02
>> Near my seat.
26:02
26:03
>> How is this your seat?
26:03
26:08
>> Cuz I was sitting there.
26:08
26:09
>> But then you left.
26:10
26:11
>> Well, it's not like I went to Spain.
26:12
26:14
[laughter]
26:14
26:15
I went to the bathroom. You knew I was
26:15
26:17
coming back.
26:17
26:17
>> What's the big deal? Sit somewhere else.
26:17
26:20
The big deal is I was sitting there
26:20
26:21
last, so it's my seat.
26:21
26:25
>> Well, actually, the last place you were
26:25
26:27
sitting was in there. So,
26:27
26:30
>> you guys, you know what? You know what?
26:30
26:32
It doesn't matter because you both have
26:32
26:34
to go get dressed before the big vein in
26:34
26:36
my head pops. So,
26:36
26:37
>> all right, Ross. I just have to do one
26:38
26:39
thing really quickly. It's not a big
26:39
26:40
deal.
26:40
26:41
>> Get up.
26:41
26:45
>> All right, fine. You know what? We'll
26:45
26:46
both sit in the chair.
26:46
26:47
>> Fine with me.
26:47
26:50
>> [laughter]
26:50
26:52
>> I'm so comfortable.
26:52
26:56
>> Me, too. In fact, I think I might be a
26:56
27:00
little too comfortable.
27:00
27:01
>> All right.
27:01
27:05
>> Okay. Look, we have 19 minutes. Okay.
27:05
27:06
Chandler, I want you to go and change.
27:06
27:08
Okay? And then when you come back, Joey
27:08
27:10
will go change and he'll have vacated
27:10
27:12
the chair. Okay? Okay.
27:12
27:14
>> All right. Fine. I'm going. When I get
27:14
27:17
back, it's chair city and I'm the guy
27:17
27:19
who's sitting in a chair.
27:19
27:24
All right. You will notice that I am
27:24
27:26
fully dressed. I in turn have noticed
27:26
27:29
that you are not. So, in the words of a
27:29
27:32
mil, get out of my chair. Dealhole.
27:32
27:38
>> Okay.
27:38
27:44
>> [applause and cheering]
27:44
27:47
>> What are you doing? Well, you said I had
27:47
27:49
to give you the chair. You didn't see
27:49
27:50
anything about the cushions.
27:50
27:52
>> The cushions are the essence of the
27:52
27:54
chair.
27:54
27:54
>> That's right. I'm taking the essence.
27:54
27:56
[laughter]
27:56
27:58
He'll be back. Oh, there's nobody in the
27:58
28:01
room.
28:01
28:05
Where's my underwear? Whoa, whoa, whoa,
28:05
28:07
whoa. Come on. Come on. What? You took
28:07
28:09
his underwear?
28:09
28:10
>> He took my essence.
28:10
28:11
>> Okay. Yeah, hold on,
28:11
28:14
>> Joey. Why Why can't you just wear the
28:14
28:15
underwear you're wearing now?
28:15
28:17
>> Cuz I'm not wearing any underwear now.
28:17
28:20
[laughter]
28:20
28:21
>> Okay. Um, then why do you have to wear
28:21
28:22
underwear tonight?
28:22
28:23
>> It's a rented tux. Okay. Not going to go
28:23
28:26
commando in another man's fatigue.
28:26
28:31
>> Well, then it looks like somebody's
28:31
28:32
going to have to give somebody back his
28:32
28:34
cushions.
28:34
28:35
>> Okay, you hide my clothes. I'm going to
28:35
28:37
do the exact opposite to you.
28:38
28:41
What are you What are you going to show
28:42
28:43
me? My clothes. Hey, opposite
28:43
28:47
is opposite.
28:47
28:50
>> He's got nothing.
28:50
28:57
[cheering]
28:57
29:01
Okay, buddy. Boy, here it is.
29:01
29:04
You hide my clothes, I'm wearing
29:04
29:06
everything you own.
29:06
29:08
Oh my god.
29:08
29:11
>> [laughter]
29:11
29:11
>> That is so not the opposite of taking
29:12
29:13
somebody's underwear.
29:13
29:15
Look at me. I'm Chandler. Could I be
29:15
29:18
wearing any more clothes?
29:18
29:22
Maybe if I wasn't going commando.
29:22
29:27
Yeah,
29:28
29:29
I'll tell you, it's hot with all this
29:29
29:31
stuff on. I uh I better not do any I
29:31
29:33
don't know, lunges.
29:33
29:37
>> Okay. Okay. Enough. But not for the
29:37
29:39
Monday. No, I'm sick of this. Okay, I've
29:39
29:41
had it up to here with you two. Neither
29:41
29:43
of you can come to the party.
29:43
29:46
>> Jeez, what a baby.
29:46
29:49
>> Presenting the award for favorite
29:49
29:50
returning male character is Mackenzie.
29:50
29:52
>> This is it. This is this is my category.
29:52
29:53
>> Oh my god. Do you have speech?
29:54
29:55
>> Yeah. Got my speech.
29:55
29:56
>> Did you got your gracious face?
29:56
29:57
>> Yep.
29:57
30:00
>> Now, Charlie, remember if you win, you
30:00
30:01
have to hug me. You hug me.
30:02
30:03
>> Okay.
30:03
30:03
>> Can I squeeze your ass [laughter]
30:04
30:07
>> on TV? proven that this is not always in
30:07
30:11
the category of favorite returning male
30:11
30:13
character. The nominees are John Wheeler
30:13
30:15
from General Hospital, [applause]
30:16
30:19
Gavin Graham from The Young and the
30:19
30:21
Restless,
30:21
30:23
Duncan Harrington from Passions,
30:23
30:26
[applause] and Joey Tribani from Days of
30:26
30:29
Our Lives.
30:29
30:32
And the Sophie goes to
30:32
30:36
Gavin Graham from The Young and the
30:36
30:37
Restless. [applause]
30:37
30:39
[music]
30:39
30:45
[music]
30:45
30:47
>> Pass the cheese, please.
30:47
30:54
>> My god, you can't even look at me, can
30:54
30:56
you?
30:56
30:57
>> Nope.
30:57
31:00
>> Hey, it's Phoebe. We can talk to BB.
31:00
31:03
[laughter]
31:03
31:04
>> No, I'm I'm too depressed to talk.
31:04
31:07
>> I'll give you $1,000 to talk to us.
31:07
31:10
[laughter]
31:10
31:10
>> Hey, you guys. What do you What do you
31:10
31:12
think about making that beach trip an
31:12
31:14
annual thing?
31:14
31:14
>> No.
31:14
31:16
>> All right, that's it. You guys, what
31:16
31:18
happened out there?
31:18
31:19
>> What? We took a walk. Nothing happened.
31:19
31:22
I came back with nothing all over me.
31:22
31:26
>> Come on. What happened, Joey?
31:26
31:29
>> All right.
31:29
31:30
>> No. Joey, we swore we'd never tell.
31:30
31:33
>> They'll never understand. [laughter]
31:33
31:38
>> We have to say something. We have to get
31:38
31:40
it out. It's eating me alive.
31:40
31:45
>> Monica got stung by a jellyfish.
31:45
31:47
>> All right.
31:47
31:52
>> All right.
31:52
31:53
[laughter]
31:53
31:56
I got stung.
31:56
31:59
stung bad. [laughter]
31:59
32:03
I couldn't stand. I I couldn't walk.
32:03
32:07
>> We were two miles from the house.
32:07
32:10
[laughter]
32:10
32:11
>> We're scared and alone.
32:11
32:13
We didn't think we could make it.
32:13
32:19
[laughter]
32:19
32:21
>> I was in too much pain.
32:21
32:22
>> And I was tired from digging the huge
32:22
32:24
hole.
32:24
32:27
And then Joey remembered something.
32:27
32:31
>> I'd seen this thing on the Discovery
32:31
32:32
Channel.
32:32
32:33
>> Wait a minute. I saw that on the
32:33
32:35
Discovery Channel. Yeah. About jellyfish
32:36
32:38
and how if you
32:38
32:43
>> Ew,
32:43
32:44
you peed on yourself.
32:44
32:46
>> Ew.
32:46
32:48
>> You can't say that. You You don't know.
32:48
32:52
I thought I was going to pass out from
32:52
32:53
the pain. Anyway, I I tried but I I
32:53
32:57
couldn't been that way.
32:57
33:02
>> So,
33:02
33:06
[cheering]
33:06
33:09
that's right. I stepped up.
33:10
33:15
>> She's my friend and she needed help.
33:15
33:18
If I had to, I'd pee on any one of you.
33:18
33:21
[laughter]
33:21
33:23
>> [applause]
33:23
33:23
[cheering]
33:23
33:26
>> only uh I couldn't
33:26
33:29
[laughter]
33:29
33:32
I got to stage fright.
33:32
33:35
>> I wanted to help but there was just too
33:35
33:37
much pressure. So So I uh I turned to
33:37
33:40
Chandler.
33:40
33:45
>> Joy kept screaming at me, "Do it now. Do
33:45
33:47
it. Do it. Do it now."
33:47
33:49
>> [laughter]
33:49
33:51
>> Sometimes late at night I can still hear
33:51
33:53
the screaming. [laughter]
33:53
33:57
>> That's cuz sometimes I just do it
33:57
33:59
through my wall to freak you out.
33:59
34:02
[music]
34:02
34:06
>> Die Hard. Still great.
34:06
34:07
>> Yeah.
34:08
34:09
>> Hey, what do you say we make it a double
34:09
34:10
feature?
34:10
34:11
>> What else do you rent?
34:11
34:13
>> Die Hard 2. [laughter]
34:13
34:16
>> Joey, this is Die Hard one again.
34:16
34:19
Oh, but we watched it a second time and
34:20
34:22
it's Die Hard, too.
34:22
34:25
>> Joey, we just saw it and
34:25
34:27
>> and it would be cool to see it again.
34:27
34:30
>> Yeah, Die Hard.
34:30
34:34
>> Dude, you didn't say Die Hard.
34:34
34:37
>> Is everything okay? [laughter]
34:37
34:40
>> Yeah, I just got I got plans.
34:40
34:42
>> Well, John Mlan had plans. [laughter]
34:42
34:46
No, you see the thing is I want to get
34:46
34:48
out of here before Joey gets all worked
34:48
34:49
up and starts calling everybody
34:49
34:53
>> What are you talking about,
34:53
34:59
[music]
34:59
35:02
[laughter]
35:02
35:12
>> [laughter]
35:12
35:16
>> What happened?
35:16
35:17
>> I don't know. [laughter] You fell
35:17
35:19
asleep. That is all.
35:19
35:22
>> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
35:22
35:26
>> All right. Well, uh, I better go.
35:26
35:28
>> Yeah, I think that would be best.
35:28
35:30
>> All right. I'll talk to you later.
35:30
35:32
>> Okay. But not about this.
35:32
35:33
>> No, never. [laughter]
35:33
35:35
>> Never.
35:35
35:36
>> So, uh, uh,
35:36
35:39
bye.
35:39
35:39
>> No touch. No. [laughter]
35:39
35:45
[music]
35:45
35:50
>> Hey,
35:50
35:51
>> just uh brought back your videos.
35:51
35:54
>> Uh hey, uh Ross, look. Uh I think we
35:54
35:57
need to talk about before.
35:57
35:58
>> No, no, we don't.
35:58
36:01
>> Yes, we do. Now, look, that was the best
36:01
36:04
nap I ever had.
36:04
36:10
I I don't know what you're talking
36:10
36:12
about.
36:12
36:14
>> Come on, admit it. That was the best nap
36:14
36:16
you ever had.
36:16
36:19
>> I've had better. [laughter]
36:19
36:22
>> Okay. When
36:22
36:26
All right. All right. It was the best
36:26
36:28
nap ever. I said it. Okay. But it's
36:28
36:31
over, Joey.
36:31
36:34
[laughter]
36:34
36:34
>> I want to do it again.
36:34
36:40
We can't do it again.
36:40
36:42
>> Why not?
36:42
36:43
>> Because it's weird.
36:43
36:45
[laughter]
36:45
36:46
>> Fine.
36:46
36:49
>> You want something to drink?
36:49
36:50
>> Sure. What do you got?
36:50
36:51
>> Warm milk and etan PM.
36:51
37:00
>> Boy, I'll tell you that judging stuff
37:00
37:02
took a lot out of me.
37:02
37:03
>> Yeah.
37:04
37:04
>> Yeah. think about maybe going upstairs
37:04
37:06
and taking a little nap on my couch.
37:06
37:11
[laughter]
37:11
37:12
>> Why Why would I care about that?
37:12
37:16
>> No reason. I'm just saying that uh
37:16
37:20
that's where I'll be.
37:20
37:25
[laughter]
37:25
37:39
>> [laughter]
37:39
37:43
[music]
37:43
37:44
[laughter]
37:44
37:52
>> Great nap.
37:52
37:53
>> It really was.
37:53
37:56
[clears throat]
37:56
37:58
>> [cheering]
37:58
38:00
[applause]
38:00
38:07
[laughter]
38:07
38:13
>> Dude, what the hell are you doing?
38:13
38:19
[laughter]
38:19
38:24
>> Excuse me.
38:24
38:27
I don't believe in these crazy diets,
38:27
38:29
you know, just everything in moderation.
38:29
38:32
>> Your muffins.
38:32
38:33
>> Uh,
38:33
38:36
>> I'll take those to go
38:36
38:39
>> for the kids. [laughter]
38:39
38:42
>> Oh, I know what I wanted to ask you. You
38:42
38:45
were on the show years ago and then they
38:45
38:46
killed you off. What happened there?
38:46
38:49
>> It's so stupid. I said some stuff in an
38:49
38:52
interview that I really shouldn't have
38:52
38:53
said, but believe me, that is not going
38:53
38:55
to happen today.
38:55
38:56
>> Understood.
38:56
38:58
>> So, what did you say back then?
38:58
38:59
>> I said that I
38:59
39:03
[laughter]
39:03
39:10
interviewing me for Soap Opera Digest.
39:10
39:12
Shel, these are my friends.
39:12
39:13
>> Hi, I'm gal pal Rachel Green. Um, and if
39:13
39:16
you want the dirt, I'm the one you come
39:16
39:18
to. This might be Joey's baby. Who
39:18
39:20
knows?
39:20
39:23
>> I'm just kidding. Seriously, gal pal
39:23
39:25
Rachel Green.
39:25
39:27
>> Who just lost the respect of her unborn
39:27
39:30
child.
39:30
39:31
>> Um, I'm going to just go get this warmed
39:32
39:33
up. Okay,
39:33
39:35
>> Joey, you're doing great.
39:35
39:36
>> Yeah, so far nothing stupid.
39:36
39:39
>> Mento. No thanks.
39:39
39:42
>> Hey Joe, what's up?
39:42
39:44
>> Bad news. I watched the tape and passed
39:44
39:46
along to my bosses and they weren't
39:46
39:47
interested.
39:47
39:49
>> Oh,
39:49
39:50
sorry, man.
39:50
39:54
But uh you watched the tape?
39:54
39:57
>> Yeah, I I I I liked it,
39:57
40:00
>> but uh my bosses didn't go for it.
40:00
40:03
Stupid sons of
40:03
40:05
[laughter]
40:05
40:10
You didn't watch the tape.
40:10
40:12
>> What? Of course I did.
40:12
40:14
>> Look, it's one thing not to cast me, but
40:14
40:16
to lie to me.
40:16
40:17
>> I'm not lying to you. I watched it.
40:17
40:19
>> No, you lied again.
40:20
40:21
>> I watched it.
40:21
40:22
>> Keep going, Pinocchio.
40:22
40:24
[laughter]
40:24
40:25
>> I did.
40:25
40:26
>> No, you didn't.
40:26
40:27
>> I'm telling you, I watched the tape.
40:27
40:31
>> Did you watch the tape?
40:31
40:33
>> No.
40:33
40:39
Can't believe Joey, [music]
40:39
40:40
I hate being called a liar.
40:40
40:42
>> But you are a liar.
40:42
40:45
>> What did I just say? [laughter]
40:45
40:48
>> You still here?
40:48
40:49
>> Yes. And I have to say I am not just
40:49
40:51
hurt. I am insulted when I tell somebody
40:51
40:54
I did something.
40:54
40:54
>> Okay. All right. Let me just stop you
40:54
40:56
right there. Okay. First you lied,
40:56
40:58
right? Then you lied about lying. Okay.
40:58
41:01
Then you lied about lying about lying.
41:02
41:04
Okay. So before you lie about lying
41:04
41:06
about lying about lying about lying,
41:06
41:10
[laughter]
41:10
41:12
stop lying.
41:12
41:14
Why are you so sure I didn't watch this
41:14
41:16
tape? You want to know why? You want to
41:16
41:17
know why?
41:17
41:19
>> Well, this is going well.
41:19
41:23
>> Here's how I know you didn't watch the
41:23
41:24
tape. Okay. If you had seen what was on
41:24
41:26
this tape, believe me, you would have
41:26
41:28
some comments. All right. Now remember,
41:28
41:31
I got paid a lot of money for this and
41:31
41:33
it only aired in Japan.
41:33
41:36
>> Ichiban
41:36
41:38
[music]
41:38
41:39
Ichiban lipstick for men.
41:39
41:54
Ichiban lipstick for men. Sai.
41:54
41:58
[laughter]
41:58
42:00
>> And that's how I know you didn't watch
42:00
42:02
the tape.
42:02
42:06
>> He really is a chameleon.
42:06
42:12
>> Hello.
42:12
42:15
>> Hello.
42:15
42:19
>> Baby,
42:19
42:21
>> Joey. What's going on?
42:21
42:23
>> What?
42:23
42:27
Oh my god.
42:27
42:28
>> I know it's stuck.
42:28
42:33
>> Dad, how did it get on?
42:34
42:36
>> I put it on to scare Chandler.
42:36
42:39
>> Oh my god. Monica's going to totally
42:39
42:42
freak out.
42:42
42:43
>> Well, then help me get it off. Plus,
42:43
42:45
well, it smells really bad in here.
42:45
42:48
>> Of course it smells really bad. You have
42:48
42:49
your head up a dead animal.
42:49
42:56
>> [laughter]
42:56
42:58
>> Hey.
42:58
43:02
>> Hey. Did you get the turkey, baby? Oh my
43:02
43:03
god. Oh my god.
43:03
43:06
>> Who is that?
43:06
43:08
>> It's Joey. [laughter]
43:08
43:10
>> What? What are you doing? And is this
43:10
43:12
supposed to be funny?
43:12
43:13
>> No, it's not supposed to be funny. It's
43:13
43:14
supposed to be scary. [laughter]
43:14
43:17
>> Get her off now.
43:17
43:19
>> I can't. It's stuck.
43:19
43:21
>> I don't care that. That turkey has to
43:21
43:22
feed 20 people at my parents house and
43:22
43:24
they're not going to eat it off your
43:24
43:25
head. [laughter]
43:25
43:26
>> Hold on. Okay, let's just I'll think.
43:26
43:32
[laughter]
43:32
43:35
>> Okay, I got it. Phoebe. All right, you
43:35
43:38
pull. I'm going to spread the legs as
43:38
43:40
wide as I can.
43:40
43:44
>> Joey, now is not the time.
43:44
43:46
>> Sorry, guys.
43:46
43:47
>> Okay, count to three. One, two, three.
43:47
43:52
[screaming]
43:52
43:54
[laughter]
43:54
43:56
>> It worked. I scared you. I knew it.
43:56
44:00
[laughter]
44:00
44:01
>> I'm over here, big guy.
44:01
44:02
>> Yeah, you are.
44:02
44:03
>> Hey, Ra. How you doing with the shining?
44:03
44:06
>> Oh, Danny just went into room 217.
44:06
44:08
>> Ooh, the next part's the best. When that
44:08
44:11
dead lady in the bathtub.
44:11
44:12
>> Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. Come
44:12
44:13
on. You're going to ruin it.
44:13
44:15
>> All right, I'll talk in code. Remember
44:15
44:17
when the kid sees those two blanks in
44:17
44:19
the hallway?
44:19
44:22
>> That's very cool.
44:22
44:24
>> All blank and no blank makes blank a
44:24
44:26
blank blank.
44:26
44:29
[laughter]
44:29
44:30
>> Oh, no. No, no. The end when Jack almost
44:30
44:33
kills them all with that blank, but then
44:33
44:34
in the last second they get away.
44:34
44:38
[laughter]
44:38
44:38
>> Joey, I can't believe you just did that.
44:38
44:40
>> I can't believe she cracked your code.
44:40
44:48
All right. Okay. Lori proposes to Joe
44:48
44:51
and she says no even though she's still
44:51
44:53
in love with him. And then he ends up
44:53
44:54
marrying Amy.
44:54
44:58
>> Hey, mine was by accident.
44:58
45:02
All right. The boiler explodes and
45:02
45:04
destroys the hotel and kills the dad.
45:04
45:09
>> Beth dies.
45:09
45:13
>> [cheering]
45:13
45:19
>> Beth.
45:19
45:20
>> Beth dies.
45:20
45:23
>> Is that true? If I keep reading, is Beth
45:23
45:25
going to die?
45:25
45:27
>> No. Beth doesn't die. She doesn't die.
45:27
45:29
Does she, Rachel?
45:29
45:30
>> What?
45:30
45:31
>> Joey's asking if you've just ruined the
45:31
45:33
first book he's ever loved that didn't
45:33
45:35
star Jack Nicholson.
45:35
45:37
Big hug. One more. Big hug. Come on.
45:37
45:42
How are you? [laughter]
45:42
45:45
>> Uh, Dr. Green, where you going?
45:45
45:47
>> To get my coat.
45:47
45:49
>> All right. All right. I can get my own
45:49
45:51
coat.
45:51
46:00
>> Sorry, we're on a major fla high.
46:00
46:03
[laughter]
46:03
46:05
>> Oh, no. No. You're not supposed to be
46:05
46:07
here cuz it's the staging area. You
46:08
46:10
should, it's all wrong. You should
46:10
46:11
leave, you know. Just get out.
46:11
46:23
>> Or perhaps you'd like a creme de
46:23
46:26
[laughter]
46:26
46:27
have to be heading toward my chateau.
46:27
46:29
Thank you.
46:29
46:30
>> Oh, all right. Well, then I guess we're
46:30
46:31
going back into the hallway again.
46:31
46:33
>> Thanks for coming, Mrs. Green.
46:33
46:39
>> [cheering]
46:39
46:42
[applause]
46:42
46:45
>> Okay,
46:45
46:47
you [laughter] take care.
46:47
46:52
>> Oh, you kids.
46:52
46:56
[sighs]
46:56
46:57
Well, [laughter]
46:57
47:00
this is the best party I've been to in
47:00
47:02
years.
47:02
47:04
Thank you.
47:04
47:14
>> [clears throat]
47:14
47:19
>> Monica,
47:19
47:22
>> what time is it?
47:22
47:24
>> Uh, 9.
47:24
47:26
[laughter]
47:26
47:27
>> But it's dark out.
47:27
47:29
>> Um, well, that's because you always
47:29
47:31
sleep till noon, silly.
47:31
47:33
This is what nine looks like. [laughter]
47:34
47:37
>> I guess I'll get washed up then.
47:37
47:40
>> Watch that sunrise.
47:40
47:45
>> I'm really getting tired of sneaking
47:45
47:47
around all the time.
47:47
47:47
>> I know. Me, too. You know. Hey, you know
47:48
47:49
what? What if we went away for the whole
47:49
47:50
weekend? You know, we'd have no
47:50
47:51
interruptions and we could be naked the
47:51
47:53
entire time.
47:53
47:55
>> All weekend. That's a whole lot of
47:55
47:57
naked. [laughter]
47:57
47:58
>> Yeah. I could say that I have a
47:58
47:59
conference and you can say you have a
47:59
48:01
chef thing. Oh, I've always wanted to go
48:02
48:04
to this culinary fair that they have in
48:04
48:05
Jersey.
48:05
48:06
>> Okay. You know, you're not
48:06
48:09
ready.
48:09
48:09
>> Let's go.
48:09
48:10
>> Okay. Wait, what about Joey?
48:10
48:29
Damn Rolos.
48:29
48:32
Hey, you're back.
48:32
48:33
>> Hey, how was your conference?
48:33
48:35
>> It was terrible. I fought with my
48:36
48:38
colleagues, you know, the entire time.
48:38
48:40
Are you kidding with this?
48:40
48:43
>> Uh, so your weekend was a total bust.
48:43
48:45
>> Uh, no. I got to see Donald Trump
48:45
48:46
waiting for an elevator. [laughter]
48:46
48:49
[music]
48:49
48:53
Hey.
48:53
48:55
Hey, Mr. Bing. That uh hotel you stayed
48:55
48:59
at called
48:59
49:01
said someone left an eyelash curler in
49:01
49:03
your room.
49:03
49:07
>> Yes, that was mine. [laughter]
49:07
49:10
>> Cuz I figured you hooked up with some
49:10
49:11
girl and she left it there.
49:11
49:13
>> Yes, that would have made more sense.
49:14
49:16
[laughter]
49:16
49:17
You know, I I don't even feel like I
49:17
49:19
know you anymore, man. All right. Look,
49:19
49:23
I'm just going to ask you this one time.
49:23
49:24
All right, and whatever you say, I'll
49:24
49:26
believe you.
49:26
49:28
Were you or were you not on a gay
49:28
49:32
cruise? [laughter]
49:32
49:38
>> Hey. Hey.
49:38
49:40
>> Hey.
49:40
49:40
>> Oh, hey, Monica. I heard you saw Donald
49:40
49:42
Trump at your convention.
49:42
49:44
>> Yeah. So, I'm waiting for an elevator.
49:44
49:48
[laughter]
49:48
49:49
>> Hey, Ra. Can I borrow your eyelash
49:49
49:51
curler? I think I lost mine.
49:51
49:52
>> Yeah. So, [cheering]
49:52
50:00
Joey, can I talk to you for a second?
50:00
50:16
Yes.
50:16
50:18
Yes.
50:18
50:20
You and and you. [laughter]
50:20
50:24
>> Yes. But you cannot tell anyone. No one
50:24
50:26
knows.
50:26
50:27
>> How? When?
50:27
50:29
>> It happened in London.
50:29
50:30
>> In London?
50:30
50:34
>> The reason we didn't tell anyone was cuz
50:34
50:36
we didn't want to make a big deal out of
50:36
50:38
it.
50:38
50:38
>> But it is a big deal.
50:38
50:41
I have to tell someone.
50:41
50:44
>> You can't. [laughter]
50:44
50:45
>> Please. Please. We just don't want to
50:45
50:46
deal with telling everyone. Okay. Just
50:46
50:48
promise you won't tell.
50:48
50:54
>> All right.
50:54
50:57
Man, this is unbelievable.
50:57
50:59
I mean, it's great. But
51:00
51:04
>> I know it's great. [laughter]
51:04
51:06
>> Oh, I don't want to see that.
51:06
51:13
O,
51:13
51:15
>> what's with all this sand?
51:16
51:17
>> Oh, yeah. Bob said there might be flood
51:18
51:20
damage.
51:20
51:20
>> Either that or he has a really big cat.
51:20
51:28
>> Well, is everybody else having just the
51:28
51:30
best time?
51:30
51:33
Sh.
51:33
51:33
>> Joey's asleep.
51:33
51:37
After
51:37
51:45
he passed out, we put the sand around
51:45
51:47
him to keep him warm.
51:47
51:51
>> Well, I assume the uh happy couple isn't
51:51
51:54
up yet. Did you guys hear them last
51:54
51:56
night?
51:56
51:56
>> Oh, yeah. I don't know what they were
51:56
51:58
doing, but at one point, sea turtles
51:58
52:00
actually came up to the house.
52:00
52:04
>> Good morning.
52:04
52:05
>> Hey.
52:05
52:05
>> Hey. How'd everybody sleep?
52:06
52:07
>> Oh, great.
52:07
52:08
>> Like a lo.
52:08
52:09
>> Us, too.
52:09
52:12
>> We're going for a walk.
52:12
52:19
>> Good morning. Nice breath, by the way.
52:19
52:23
[laughter]
52:23
52:27
>> Hey, buddy.
52:28
52:28
>> So, I just talked to one of the duel
52:28
52:30
writers today. And
52:30
52:31
>> what is duel?
52:31
52:32
>> Days of our lives.
52:32
52:35
Anyway, you're not going to believe it.
52:35
52:37
My character is coming out of his coma.
52:37
52:41
>> And and and not only that, I'm getting a
52:41
52:43
new brain.
52:43
52:45
[laughter]
52:45
52:46
>> So, great things are happening at work
52:46
52:48
and in your personal life.
52:48
52:51
>> Wait, what do you mean you're getting a
52:51
52:52
new brain?
52:52
52:53
>> Oh, well, they're killing off one of the
52:53
52:54
characters on the show, and when she
52:54
52:55
dies, her brain is being transplanted
52:56
52:58
into my body.
52:58
53:00
[laughter]
53:00
53:01
>> What? A brain transplant? It's
53:01
53:05
ridiculous.
53:05
53:06
>> Well, I think it's ridiculous that you
53:06
53:07
haven't had sex in three and a half
53:07
53:08
months.
53:08
53:14
>> It's winter. There are fewer people on
53:14
53:16
the street. [laughter]
53:16
53:20
>> Who are they killing off?
53:20
53:21
>> Uh Cecilia Monroe. She plays Jessica
53:21
53:23
Lockheart.
53:23
53:24
>> No.
53:24
53:26
>> She is so good at throwing drinks in
53:26
53:29
people's faces. I mean, I don't think
53:29
53:30
I've ever seen her finish a beverage.
53:30
53:32
And the way she slaps people all the
53:32
53:34
time. Wouldn't you love to do that just
53:34
53:35
once?
53:35
53:35
>> Oh, dude. [laughter]
53:36
53:38
>> And she's been on the show forever. It's
53:38
53:40
going to be really hard to fill her
53:40
53:41
shoes.
53:41
53:42
>> Yeah. Yeah. Help me out here. When you
53:42
53:44
when you come out of the brain
53:44
53:47
transplant,
53:47
53:49
you are going to be her?
53:49
53:52
>> Yes, but in Drake Remor's body.
53:52
53:55
[laughter]
53:55
53:58
>> Why is this so hard for you to get? I
53:58
53:59
thought you were a scientist. I'm very
53:59
54:00
glad that you saved Ross and the car
54:00
54:02
backfired, but it could have been a
54:02
54:03
bullet and you you know, you didn't try
54:03
54:05
to save me.
54:05
54:07
[groaning]
54:07
54:07
>> Oh, you're upset because you think I
54:07
54:10
chose Ross over you. No, I knew you
54:10
54:14
could take care of yourself. You know, I
54:14
54:17
mean, Ross, he needs help. He's not
54:17
54:19
street like us.
54:19
54:21
>> What it comes down to is you would risk
54:21
54:22
your life for Ross before you would for
54:22
54:24
me. That's the bottom line,
54:24
54:27
wouldn't it? No, not exactly. All right,
54:27
54:30
look. I I wasn't trying to save Ross,
54:30
54:35
okay?
54:35
54:37
My sandwich was next to Ross. [laughter]
54:37
54:42
All right.
54:42
54:45
I I was trying to save my sandwich
54:45
54:49
from a bullet.
54:49
54:52
I know it doesn't make much sense.
54:52
54:54
>> Much sense.
54:54
54:56
>> Chandler, it was instinct. Okay. I just
54:56
54:58
went for it. So, you risked your life
54:58
55:00
for a sandwich. I know it sounds crazy,
55:00
55:03
but Chandler, this is the greatest
55:03
55:06
sandwich in the world. [laughter]
55:06
55:10
>> So, you didn't uh choose Ross before me.
55:10
55:14
>> No, I would never do that. You You're
55:14
55:17
like my brother.
55:17
55:19
>> Really?
55:19
55:20
>> Yeah. In fact, to prove how much you
55:20
55:24
mean to me
55:24
55:31
here.
55:31
55:32
>> Thanks. Oh. Oh, easy. It's not a hot
55:32
55:35
dog.
55:35
55:37
[laughter]
55:37
55:41
How good is that?
55:42
55:43
>> Oh,
55:44
55:46
see.
55:46
55:47
>> Mhm.
55:47
55:47
>> Hey, dude. What are you doing?
55:48
55:50
I thought you were showing me how much I
55:50
55:52
mean to you. Yeah. With a bite.
55:52
55:54
[laughter]
55:54
55:55
>> Jeez.
55:55
55:56
>> Did I miss it? Did I miss it?
55:56
55:58
>> No. No. I'm on right after this guy
55:58
55:59
shoots himself.
55:59
56:01
>> Whoa. She's pretty.
56:01
56:03
>> Yeah. Oh, and she's really nice, too.
56:03
56:05
She taught me all about, you know, how
56:06
56:07
to work with the cameras and smell the
56:07
56:09
fart acting.
56:09
56:13
>> I'm sorry. What?
56:14
56:16
It's like you got so many lines to learn
56:16
56:19
so fast that sometimes you need a minute
56:19
56:21
to remember your next one. So while
56:22
56:23
you're thinking of it, you take this big
56:23
56:26
pause where you look all intense, you
56:26
56:28
know, like this.
56:28
56:34
>> Okay.
56:34
56:36
>> Oh, here's my scene. Here's my scene.
56:36
56:41
>> Mrs. Wallace.
56:41
56:42
>> Yes.
56:42
56:43
>> I'm Dr. Dr. Drake Remor, your sister's
56:43
56:45
neurosurgeon.
56:45
56:46
>> Yeah.
56:46
56:46
>> Tell me, is she going to be all right?
56:46
56:48
>> I'm afraid the situation is much more
56:48
56:50
dire than we'd expected.
56:50
56:52
Your sister is suffering from a
56:52
57:00
a subcranial hematoma.
57:00
57:04
Perhaps we can discuss this further over
57:04
57:07
coffee.
57:07
57:10
[laughter]
57:10
57:13
Oh, nice.
57:13
57:15
>> Yeah, thankfully.
57:15
57:17
>> You know, for a minute there, I thought
57:17
57:18
you were actually trying to smell
57:18
57:19
something.
57:19
57:21
[laughter]
57:21
57:21
>> Oh, yay. Look, there's a piece that
57:21
57:23
doesn't have floor on it.
57:23
57:25
>> Stick to your side.
57:25
57:26
>> Come on now.
57:26
57:30
[laughter]
57:30
57:39
>> All right. What are we having?
57:39
57:44
>> [music]
57:44
歌词与翻译
[中文]
好车。
...
>> 是的，呃，这不是我的。
...
>> 我喜欢你的车。
...
>> 是的，它是我的。
...
[笑声]
...
>> 我打赌它很快。
...
>> 我也是。是的。
...
而且很舒服。你呃你喜欢
...
真皮座椅？
...
>> 是的。
...
>> 找到了。
...
是的，她的最高成绩是 130。
...
>> 哇。那只是在城市里。我得到
...
当我带她上州时，她会达到 160。
...
>> 真的吗？
...
>> 您有位置吗？
...
>> 当然。
...
>> 好吧，呃，稍后见。好的，拿
...
很简单。
...
>> 嘿，
...
那是我的车。
...
>> 真的吗？哦。呃，但给我五个
还有
分钟。
...
什么？你在干什么？哦，好吧，我呃
...
我找到了钥匙，现在我只是
...
打磨她。
...
>> 但这是我的车。
...
>> 是的，但这是我的蜡。
...
>> 听着，我不常来这个城市
...
我不知道你是疯了还是
...
这是某种街头剧场，但是
...
可以给我钥匙吗？
...
>> 当然。这里。
...
>> 我会，呃，我会保留你的停车位。
...
>> 不会回来。
...
>> 为什么不呢？
...
>> 我住在北部。
...
>> 是的，我也是。[笑]
...
于是，保时捷小伙子把他的车开回来了。
...
[笑声]
...
>> 但你找到了他衣服的钥匙。
...
[笑声]
...
>> 不，我只是呃我只是喜欢这样
...
当每个人都认为我拥有
时的感受
保时捷。
...
>> 人们会认为你拥有一辆保时捷
...
因为你穿着这些衣服。
...
>> 当然，[笑]只是个白痴
如果你没有
就会穿这个东西
，
车，对吧？
...
>> [笑声]
...
>> 确实如此。
...
>> 是的，但只有天才才会吞下
...
声波枪。
...
>> 哦，我去过那里。
...
>> 我要去开我的保时捷。
...
>> 乔伊，你知道你实际上没有
...
一个。
...
>> 来吧。你在干什么？我在
...
个字符。你会和她说话吗？
...
>> 嘿，嘿，嘿，小心我的门廊。
...
嗨，乔伊。
...
>> 嘿，你好吗？
...
>> 他拥有
下最令人惊叹的保时捷
在那里。
...
>> 我很想给你看，但我只是塞了
...
她进来了。她正在睡觉。 [笑声]
...
>> 嘿，呃，你们两个女孩想去吗
...
喝一杯？
...
>> 我们都应该盛装打扮去
...
在广场喝香槟。
...
>> 哦，好吧。
...
>> 但我我我不能呆太久。我必须
...
早起参加商业试镜
...
明天我一定要打扮得漂漂亮亮的。
...
应该扮演一个 19 岁的人。
...
[笑声]
...
>> 什么？所以，当你说早起时，
...
你指的是 1986 年吗？
...
[笑声]
...
>> 你们不觉得我看起来像19岁吗？
...
>> 哦，19。我们以为你说的是 90。
...
>> 好了，大家走吧。我们走吧。
...
>> 好的。
...
天啊。
...
[笑声]
...
[笑声]
...
>> 高级。
...
[笑声]
...
好的，伙计。
...
拿走你想要的任何东西。请
...
别伤害我。
...
>> 这就像玩一个小 PlayStation，
...
啊？
...
太棒了。 [笑声]
...
PlayStation 很糟糕。 [笑声]
...
敲击一下。 PlayStation 污水坑。
...
[笑声]
...
啊？
...
来吧。我是19岁还是什么？
...
>> 是的。范围从 1 到 10，10 是
...
你是看起来最愚蠢的人
...
肯定是19。[笑声]
...
>> 来吧，伙计。真的吗？几岁了？
...
>> 年轻。你是个男孩子。好的，现在开始
...
换衣服，因为每个人都准备好了。
...
哦，请保留我的内衣。
...
[笑声]
...
>> 哦，谢谢。
...
>> 好的，
...
>> 现在我可以通过19了，对吗？
...
>> 是的，您可以通过 19。
...
>> 真的吗？
...
>> 是的。
...
>> 认真的吗？严重地？严重地？编号
...
好的。您可以玩自己的年龄，
...
是 31。
...
[笑声]
...
我30岁了。
...
>> 乔伊，你不是。你 31 岁了。
...
>> 哦糟糕。
...
>> 钱德勒在哪里？
...
>> 呃，他来不了。他说他必须
...
回到他的呃工作并做呃呃。
...
[笑声]
...
>> 乔伊。
...
>> 乔伊·特里巴尼。
...
乔伊，我能看到你。好的。你隐藏了
...
在外套后面。
...
[笑声]
...
>> 关闭一个。
...
>> 嘿。
...
>> 嘿。嘿。
...
>> 嗯，钱德勒在吗？
...
>> 不。嗯，他在咖啡店遇到了一些女孩
...
房子。
...
>> 是的。
...
>> 姜汁之类的东西。不，
...
[笑声]
...
不，不。呃，你确定这不是
...
听起来像姜的东西？像
...
呃姜？
...
>> 不，是姜。我记得是因为
...
当他告诉我时，我说的是电影明星。
...
>> 天哪，这就是我隐藏的女孩
...
来自。当她发现他是我的
...
室友，她要告诉他我的
...
做到了。
...
>> 那么，你做了什么？
...
>>哦。哦。哦，不。不，我不能
...
我不能告诉你这一点。是的，就像
...
我经历过的最可怕、最可怕的事情
...
是我一生中完成的。
...
>> 你知道吗？别告诉我们。我们只需
...
等到Junior回家，因为它会
...
这样会更有趣。
...
>> 好的。
...
好的。就像四年前一样。好的。
...
我和金杰出去过几次。
...
然后这个周末，我们去了
...
她爸爸的小屋。只有我、她和她
...
烦人的小狗，Pepper。
...
好吧，那天晚上，我真的做了这个
...
浪漫晚餐。
...
>> 你让她食物中毒。
...
>> 我希望。
...
[笑声]
...
晚餐后，我、她和Pepper一起
...
在火前睡着了。嗯，
...
我半夜醒来
...
我看到火正在熄灭。所以，我
...
捡起一根木头并把它扔了上去。
...
[笑声]
...
或者至少我认为是日志。
...
>> 天哪，你把胡椒粉放在火上。
...
[笑声]
...
>> 我希望。
...
看吧，我猜我可能会做另一件事
...
应该告诉你关于 Ginger 的是
...
她有点呃
...
假腿。
...
[笑声]
...
>> 天哪。
...
乔伊，你扔
后做了什么
她的腿着火了？
...
>> 我跑了。
...
>> 先走。
...
>> 好的。
...
>> 好的。好的。 [鼓掌]
...
欢迎来到美国。
...
>> 好吧。
...
>> 天哪。
...
>> 连续两个。你必须使用你的
现在
舌头。 [笑声]
...
>> 几率有多大？几率有多大？
...
>> [鼓掌]
...
>> 好吧，这就足够了，你知道。让
...
让别人玩吧。
...
[笑声]
...
>> 如果你不想玩，那为什么要
...
你来参加聚会吗？
...
>> 你必须偷窃
...
[音乐和歌唱] 一两个，孩子们。
...
你必须掏出两个人的口袋。
...
>> 可爱。 [笑声]
...
太可爱了。
...
>> 真的吗？谢谢。
...
>> 听着，乔伊，我们绝对想看到
...
周六给您回电。
...
>> 非常好。 [笑声]
...
>> 我会在那里。
...
>> 好的。听着，别忘了带上
...
用于舞蹈试镜的爵士鞋。
...
>> 嗯嗯。我呃我的经纪人说
...
不是舞蹈部分。
...
>> 哦，乔伊，所有角色都必须跳舞
...
一点。但请相信我，用你的舞蹈
...
背景，这将是小菜一碟。
...
与
一起学习三年现代舞
暮光萨普。
...
[笑声]
...
>> 美国芭蕾舞团五年
...
剧院。
...
[笑声]
...
>> 嘿，每个人都在简历上撒谎。
...
好的。我不是 Zoom 孩子之一
...
也可以。
...
>> 那么，你喜欢跳舞吗？
...
>> 是的，我会跳舞，你知道。
...
>> [欢呼]
...
>> 哦，不。不，不，不。 [笑声]
...
>> 什么？那是什么？
...
>> 当然现在看起来很愚蠢。没有
...
音乐正在播放。
...
[音乐]
...
[笑声]
...
>> 呃，乔伊。乔伊·特里巴尼。
...
>> 听着，乔伊。我遇到问题了。我只是
...
接到我的舞蹈队长的电话。他是
...
有感情危机但不能
...
离开长岛。
...
>> 那么，这是否意味着试镜结束了？
...
[笑声]
...
>> 听着，乔伊。既然你已经有了
...
最丰富的经验，
...
>> 我希望你参加这些舞蹈
...
教他们组合。
...
[笑声]
...
>> 另外，哦，乔伊，来吧。这很容易。你
...
知道，是手
...
头
...
起。
...
这里有大转弯。隆达·吉恩
...
向后滑动一步和爵士手。
...
>> 这是爵士乐手中的一步。
...
玩得开心。
...
再见。
...
好吧，我们开始吧。
...
>> [欢呼和掌声]
...
>> 不，不，不。
...
那是什么？我知道。这是我最好的
...
可以从他身上逃脱。
...
嗯，人们，人们，人们，人们，
...
让我们再试一次。这一次，让我们
...
大家都看乔伊。 [笑声]
...
向他们展示它是如何完成的。
...
[笑声]
...
>> 全部数回来。
...
>> 85.
...
>> 你是什么意思？昨天你说我
...
太漂亮了，无法花钱买东西。
...
>> 只是我不能，因为我的经理
...
说我
...
祝你生日快乐。
...
祝你生日快乐。生日快乐，
...
亲爱的安妮。
...
>> 艾米。
...
>> 艾米。
...
>> 祝你生日快乐。嘿。嘿。那是
...
奇怪。今天也是我的生日。
...
>> 是的。不在这里。这是。
...
[欢呼]
...
>> 祝你生日快乐。
...
>> 你正在为此付出代价。
...
>> 不不不，今天是她的生日。
...
>> 您已为 20 岁的孩子唱生日快乐歌
今天
不同的女性。
...
但确实
...
>> 我们不再被授权分发
...
生日松饼。
...
[笑声]
...
>> 该死的。
...
>> 我们要把旧车带到罗斯家。
...
我们一会儿就回来。哦，等等。
...
在你们走之前，我可以问你们一个问题吗
...
问题？
...
>> 是的。
...
>> 嗯，当一个男人和他的男朋友分手时
...
女朋友，什么才合适
...
进行
之前需要等待的时间
移动？
...
>> 哦，我想说大约一个月。
...
>> 真的吗？我想说三到四个。
...
>> 半小时。
...
[笑声]
...
有趣。
...
>> 如果是你的助手，我会说
...
从不。
...
>> 好吧，Ra。最大的问题是，
...
他喜欢你吗？正确的？因为如果他
...
不喜欢你，这都是胡言乱语
...
点。
...
[笑声]
...
>> 啊？哞点？
...
>> 是的。这就像牛的意见一样。
...
这并不重要。
...
[笑声]
...
我是哞。
...
[笑声]
...
>> 我是不是和他住在一起太久了
...
还是这一切都有意义？
...
[笑声]
...
>> 请不要听乔伊的话。好的。会
...
你看着他吗？我他是他显然是
...
郁闷。他远离了家人。
...
他要和
一起过感恩节
个陌生人。他现在需要的是
...
让你成为他的朋友。
...
>> 哦，你说得对。对不起。谢谢。
...
好吧，这就是我要做的。
...
>> 很好。听取他们的建议。
...
当
时没有人听我说话
包真漂亮。没人关心
...
里面有什么。
...
>> 哦，我想嗯晚安。
...
>> 好吧，除非你呃除非你想
...
闲逛。
...
>> 是的。
...
>> 是的。我会让你和我的鸭子一起玩。
...
[清嗓子]
...
[音乐]
...
嘿，
...
脱衣舞娘。
...
[笑声]
...
[音乐]
...
>> 脱衣舞娘偷走了戒指。
...
脱衣舞娘偷走了戒指。泰勒，站起来。
...
站起来。脱衣舞娘偷走了戒指。
...
>> 什么？戒指不见了。
...
好的，请给我一点时间
...
为此醒来。
...
你丢失了戒指。你是最差最好的
...
个男人。
...
>> 老兄，这不好笑。我要去做什么
...
要做什么？我昨晚睡觉了，
...
一切都很酷。我醒来
...
早上，脱衣舞娘走了，
...
戒指不见了。
...
>> 你和脱衣舞女睡过？
...
>> 当然。
...
>> 机场，嗯？你知道这已经结束了
...
30 英里。这将花费您大约
...
太便宜了。打扰一下。那是 50 美元。
...
>> 什么？
...
>> 50 美元。
...
>> 哦，你知道那是什么吗？它很脏，因为
...
它们是传真页。现在，当我在
时
我们的日子 饰演 Dr. Drake Remor，
...
他们会在
发送整个脚本
真实的纸张和一切。
...
>> 太棒了。而且而且只是这样你
...
知道，如果您想扩展此
...
场景，比如出租车撞车或
...
某件事，我可以照顾受害者
...
因为我有医学背景
...
表演。
...
>> 好的，听着。感谢您的光临。
...
>> 不，不。呃，不用感谢我的到来。
...
呃，至少让我说完。
...
>> 呃我们可以走高速公路，但是呃
...
一天中的这个时候你的状态会更好
...
接受预算。
...
你正在寻找单词桥
...
在那里，不是吗？
...
>> 我会度过美好的一天。
...
[笑声]
...
[笑声]
...
非常有趣，罗斯。非常逼真，
...
有趣。好的。 [笑声]
...
哦，不，不，不，不。我没有向
挥手
你，女士。
...
哇哦。也许我是。
...
>> 嘿，莫妮卡。
中这个非常火辣的女孩
罗斯的建筑正在向我调情。
...
>> 进去吧，伙计。调情回来。混合
...
起。
...
>> 是的，我对此很不满意。
...
[笑声]
...
>> 好的，开始了。
...
如何
...
你
...
在做什么？
...
[笑声]
...
成功了。她正在向我招手。好的，
...
我马上过来。让我们来看看。她在
...
三楼。
...
>> 哇。她很漂亮吧？
...
>> 告诉我吧。啊？
...
哦，不。不，不，不，不。我不和
在一起
她。不，那只是莫妮卡。
...
乔伊·佩波尼。
...
>> 哦，还是太民族化了。我的经纪人认为我
...
应该有一个更中性的名称。
...
乔伊瑞士。
...
另外，你知道，我认为应该是
...
乔。你知道，乔伊让我听起来像
...
嗯，我不知道这么大，我也不是。
...
乔
...
斯大林[哼哼]
...
斯大林[笑声]
...
斯大林。我知道这个名字吗？听起来
...
熟悉。好吧，它没有响铃
...
和我一起。
...
乔·斯大林，[笑声]
...
你知道，这非常好。
...
你可能想试试约瑟夫。
...
>> 约瑟夫·斯大林。
...
>> 我想你会记住这一点。
...
>> 哦，是的。 [笑声]
...
再见约瑟夫·斯大林主演的小鸟球。
...
约瑟夫·斯大林是
上的小提琴手
屋顶。
...
你知道已经有一个约瑟夫
...
斯大林。 [笑声]
...
>> 你在开玩笑吧。
...
>> 显然他就是这位俄罗斯独裁者
...
谁屠杀了所有这些人。
...
你会认为你会知道这一点。
...
你知道，你会认为我会的。
...
>> 嘿伙计们。嘿亲爱的。
...
>> 准备好了吗？
...
>> 是的，当然。哦，我把钱包落在
...
莫妮卡的。我马上回来。
...
>> 等一下。乐趣。哦。
...
哇哦，那个人一直在继续。
...
>> 哇。你和菲比，是吧？你多久了
...
出去了吗？
...
>> 一个多月了。
...
>> 哇。也许呃也许你和我应该
...
更好地了解彼此。
...
>> 当然，我愿意。
...
>> 是的。所以，呃
...
你叫什么名字？
...
这是杰克。
...
>> 乔伊。
...
>> 嘿，杰克。呃，你喜欢尼克斯队吗？
...
>> 是的，超级粉丝。
...
>> 我也是。周二有一场比赛。你
...
想去吗？
...
>> 是的，那就太好了。让我确认一下
...
我周二什么都不做
...
[笑声]
...
[音乐]
...
>>听。你知道当你
...
穿着裤子，你身体前倾，我
...
看看你的内衣吗？
...
>> 是的。
...
[笑声]
...
当杰克这样做时，我看到他是
...
穿着女士内衣。
...
>> 我知道。他们是我的。
...
>> 哦，[笑声]
...
没有。不，等等。这很奇怪。
...
>> 不，不是。我们只是闲聊
...
周围，我鼓励他试穿。
...
>> 这很奇怪。
...
>> 我现在穿着他的内裤。
...
>> 有点热。
...
>> 我也这么认为。还有那个小襟翼，
...
非常适合放置我的口红。
...
>> [笑声]
...
>> 是的，我不知道这一点。
...
>> 你知道杰克说女性的
...
内衣其实更舒服
...
他喜欢丝绸的触感
...
贴在他的皮肤上。
...
>> 是的。好吧，接下来你知道的，他就会
...
告诉你你的高跟鞋是
...
对他的姿势有好处。
...
>> 杰克没有任何问题。好的。
...
他是个凡人。我想得更多
...
比你多。
...
>> 哦，是的。他看起来像一个真正的伐木工人
...
粉色鞋带。
...
我只是说只有男人
...
对自己的男子气概完全放心
...
可以穿着女士内衣到处走动。
...
我认为你永远做不到。
...
>> 嘿，我对自己的男子气概很自信。
...
>> 好吧，无论如何。
...
>> 你已经看过我的一大堆色情片了，
...
对吗？
...
[音乐]
...
[笑声]
...
是的。
...
[笑声]
...
[笑声]
...
>> 嘿，菲布斯。
...
>> 嘿，
...
看看吧。
...
>> 啊？ [欢呼]
...
>> 我到底有多像个男人？
...
>> 哇。好的。有男子气概，也有点
...
[笑声]
...
>> 你知道，我开始明白杰克的意思了
...
正在谈论。
...
>> 丝绸的手感非常好。
...
>> 是的。而且事情并没有那么糟糕
...
正如我想象的那样。
...
太棒了，乔。
...
>> 是的。而且您还有更多选择
...
比您对男士内衣的做法要好。
...
比基尼、法式剪裁、丁字裤和
...
面料。你有棉质、丝绸、蕾丝和
...
你知道吗？我一直想知道
...
关于内裤锄头。
...
你知道，它们是从你的脚趾开始的
...
然后他们一直走到
...
[笑声]
...
>> 我应该把这些脱下来，不是吗？
...
>> 我认为您这样做很重要
...
>> 感觉好多了。
...
>> 是的。很多。
...
听着，呃，这并不是说我对
缺乏安全感
我的男子气概或其他什么，你知道，但是呃
...
我想我需要和一个女人交往
...
就像现在一样。
...
>> 是的，我明白了。
...
>> 是的。好的。
...
>> 嘿。你好。
...
>>嗨。
...
>> 你知道，你看起来很眼熟。我知道吗
...
你来自什么地方？
...
>> 我不这么认为。
...
>> 也许是因为我在电视上。
...
>> [笑声]
...
>> 我是《我们的日子》的演员。
...
>> 哇。
...
>> 真的吗？
...
>> 嗯。
...
>> 450，请。
...
>> 哦，让我拿这个。
...
[笑声]
...
>> 这些是给你的。
...
>> 大家好。
...
>> 嘿。
...
>> 哦，袋子里有什么？
...
>>哦。呃，好吧，你知道艾玛是如何开始的
...
正在抓取？我意识到这个地方是
...
对婴儿来说非常不安全。所以，我去了
...
商店和我给宝宝买了一些东西
...
证明公寓。
...
>> 天啊。婴儿打样。为什么会这样
...
现在有什么大不了的吗？你知道，当我还是
的时候
孩子，就像是，“哎呀，乔伊摔倒了
...
下楼梯。”或者，呃，“哎呀，乔伊
...
再次触电身亡。” [笑声]
...
>> 无论如何，嗯，你会得到一个
...
杂工来安装这个东西？
...
>> 不，我只是想自己做。
...
>> 是的。
...
>> [笑声]
...
>> 你打算这么做吗？
...
>> 是的。为什么？你不认为女人可以
...
这样做吗？
...
>> 嗯，女人不能。你不能。
...
>> 莫妮卡，你能告诉乔伊吗
...
他是猪？
...
>> 你是头猪，你不能这样做。
...
>> 什么？
...
>> 什么？快点。我找到了硬件
...
全部由我自己存储。
...
>> 五金店就在
的正下方
街。
...
>>
正下方有一家五金店
街。
...
>> [音乐]
...
>>嗨。因此，您屈服并决定致电
...
某人？
...
>> 是的，我不知道我在跟谁开玩笑。我
...
几乎不会使用筷子。
...
>> 一切就绪。
...
>> 哦，非常感谢。哦。哦，等等。你
...
呃忘了你的游戏了。
...
>> 谢谢。
...
[音乐]
...
>> [笑声]
...
>> 拉。
...
[哼哼]
...
[笑声]
...
雷切尔。
...
[笑声]
...
[笑声]
...
[笑声]
...
所以，我不能做任何我喜欢的事情。
...
[笑声]
...
我做到了。我做到了。好的。
...
[笑声]
...
最好带上我能带的所有东西。
...
谁知道我什么时候能进去
...
又来了，嗯？
...
>> 好吧。我参加了测验，结果是
...
我确实把事业放在男人之前。
...
[笑声]
...
>> 站起来。
...
>> 什么？
...
>> 我的座位附近。
...
>> 这是你的座位吗？
...
>> 因为我坐在那里。
...
>> 但后来你离开了。
...
>> 好吧，我又没去西班牙。
...
[笑声]
...
我去了洗手间。你知道我是
...
回来了。
...
>> 有什么大不了的？坐在别的地方。
...
重要的是我坐在那里
...
最后，所以这是我的座位。
...
>> 嗯，实际上，你上次去的地方
...
坐在那里。所以，
...
>> 你们知道吗？你知道吗？
...
没关系，因为你们都有
...
去
的大静脉前穿好衣服
我的头突然爆了。所以，
...
>> 好吧，罗斯。我只需要做一件事
...
事情很快。这不是一个大
...
交易。
...
>> 站起来。
...
>> 好吧，好吧。你知道吗？我们会
...
两人都坐在椅子上。
...
>> 没问题。
...
>> [笑声]
...
>> 我很舒服。
...
>> 我也是。事实上，我想我可能是
...
有点太舒服了。
...
>> 好的。
...
>> 好的。看，我们还有 19 分钟。好的。
...
钱德勒，我要你去换衣服。
...
可以吗？然后当你回来时，乔伊
...
将去换衣服，他将腾出
...
椅子。好的？好的。
...
>> 好吧。美好的。我要去。当我得到
...
回来，这是主席城市，我就是那个人
...
谁坐在椅子上。
...
好吧。你会注意到我是
...
穿戴整齐。我又注意到
...
你不是。所以，用
的话来说
mil，从椅子上站起来。交易洞。
...
>> 好的。
...
>> [掌声和欢呼]
...
>> 你在做什么？好吧，你说我有
...
把椅子给你。您没有看到
...
有关坐垫的任何信息。
...
>> 坐垫是
的精髓
椅子。
...
>> 没错。我正在吸取精华。
...
[笑声]
...
他会回来的。哦，
里没有人
间。
...
我的内衣在哪里？哇哦，哇哦，
...
哇哦。快点。快点。什么？你拿了
...
他的内衣？
...
>> 他夺走了我的本质。
...
>> 好的。是的，等等，
...
>> 乔伊。为什么你为什么不能只穿
你现在穿的
内衣？
...
>> 因为我现在没有穿任何内衣。
...
[笑声]
...
>> 好的。嗯，那你为什么要穿
今晚
内衣？
...
>> 这是一件租来的礼服。好的。不会去
...
突击队员在另一个人的疲劳中。
...
>> 好吧，那么它看起来像是某人的
...
必须归还某人的
...
垫子。
...
>> 好吧，你把我的衣服藏起来。我要
...
做与你完全相反的事情。
...
你是什么，你要展示什么
...
我？我的衣服。嘿，
对面
是相反的。
...
>> 他一无所有。
...
[欢呼]
...
好的，伙计。男孩，就在这里。
...
你把我的衣服藏起来，我穿着
...
你拥有的一切。
...
天啊。
...
>> [笑声]
...
>> 这与
并不相反
某人的内衣。
...
看着我。我是钱德勒。我可以
...
还穿衣服吗？
...
也许如果我不去突击队的话。
...
是的，
...
我告诉你，这一切都很热
...
的东西。我呃我最好不要做任何事情
...
不知道，弓步。
...
>> 好的。好的。足够的。但不适用于
...
星期一。不，我厌倦了这个。好的，我已经
...
和你们两个已经到这里了。两者都不是
...
个人可以参加聚会。
...
>> 天哪，真是个宝贝。
...
>> 为最喜爱的
颁奖
回归的男性角色是Mackenzie。
...
>> 就是这样。这是我的类别。
...
>> 天啊。你有发言权吗？
...
>> 是的。我的演讲收到了
...
>> 你有你那张慈祥的脸吗？
...
>> 是的。
...
>> 现在，查理，记住，如果你赢了，你
...
必须拥抱我。你拥抱我。
...
>> 好的。
...
>> 我可以捏捏你的屁股吗[笑]
...
>> 在电视上？证明这并不总是在
...
最喜欢的回归男性类别
...
个字符。提名者是约翰·惠勒
...
来自总医院，[鼓掌]
...
《年轻人与年轻人》中的加文·格雷厄姆
...
焦躁不安，
...
《激情》中的邓肯·哈林顿，
...
[掌声] 和《Days of
》中的 Joey Tribani
我们的生活。
...
苏菲前往
...
《年轻人与
》中的加文·格雷厄姆
焦躁不安。 [鼓掌]
...
[音乐]
...
[音乐]
...
>> 请把奶酪递过来。
...
>> 天啊，你连看都不敢看我，可以吗
...
你？
...
>> 不。
...
>> 嘿，我是菲比。我们可以和BB谈谈。
...
[笑声]
...
>> 不，我太沮丧了，无法说话。
...
>> 我会给你 1,000 美元来与我们交谈。
...
[笑声]
...
>> 嘿，你们。你做什么你做什么
...
考虑让海滩旅行成为
...
年度事件？
...
>> 号
...
>> 好吧，就是这样。你们，什么
...
发生在那里？
...
>> 什么？我们散步了。什么也没发生。
...
我回来时浑身一无所有。
...
>> 来吧。发生了什么事，乔伊？
...
>> 好吧。
...
>> 不，乔伊，我们发誓永远不会告诉。
...
>> 他们永远不会明白。 [笑声]
...
>> 我们必须说点什么。我们必须得到
...
出来了。它正在把我活活吃掉。
...
>> 莫妮卡被水母蜇了。
...
>> 好吧。
...
>> 好的。
...
[笑声]
...
我被蜇了。
...
被蜇得很厉害。 [笑声]
...
我受不了了。我无法行走。
...
>> 我们距离房子有两英里。
...
[笑声]
...
>> 我们感到害怕和孤独。
...
我们认为我们无法成功。
...
[笑声]
...
>> 我太痛苦了。
...
>> 我厌倦了挖掘巨大的
...
洞。
...
然后乔伊想起了一件事。
...
>> 我在 Discovery 上看到过这个东西
...
频道。
...
>> 等一下。我在
上看到了
探索频道。是的。关于水母
...
如果你
...
>> 呃，
...
你尿在自己身上了。
...
>> 呃。
...
>> 你不能这么说。你你不知道。
...
我以为我要从
昏过去了
痛苦。无论如何，我尝试过，但我
...
不可能是这样。
...
>> 所以，
...
[欢呼]
...
没错。我走上前去。
...
>> 她是我的朋友，她需要帮助。
...
如果有必要的话，我会在你们任何一个人身上撒尿。
...
[笑声]
...
>> [鼓掌]
...
[欢呼]
...
>> 只是呃我不能
...
[笑声]
...
我怯场了。
...
>> 我想帮忙，但实在是太多了
...
压力很大。所以我呃我转向
...
钱德勒。
...
>> Joy 一直对我尖叫，“现在就做。
...
它。做吧。现在就做吧。”
...
>> [笑声]
...
>> 有时深夜我还能听到
...
尖叫声。 [笑声]
...
>> 那是因为有时我只是这么做
...
穿过我的墙来吓唬你。
...
[音乐]
...
>> 虎胆龙威。还是很棒的。
...
>> 是的。
...
>> 嘿，你说我们把它变成双倍怎么样
...
功能？
...
>> 您还租什么？
...
>>《虎胆龙威2》。[笑声]
...
>> 乔伊，这又是《虎胆龙威》了。
...
哦，但是我们又看了一遍
...
这也是《虎胆龙威》。
...
>> 乔伊，我们刚刚看到了
...
>> 如果能再次看到它那就太酷了。
...
>> 是的，《虎胆龙威》。
...
>> 老兄，你没有说《虎胆龙威》。
...
>> 一切都好吗？ [笑声]
...
>> 是的，我刚刚有了计划。
...
>> 嗯，约翰·姆兰有计划。 [笑声]
...
不，你看，我想得到
...
在乔伊完成所有工作之前离开这里
...
起身并开始给大家打电话
...
>> 你在说什么，
...
[音乐]
...
[笑声]
...
>> [笑声]
...
>> 发生了什么？
...
>> 我不知道。 [笑声]你摔倒了
...
睡着了。仅此而已。
...
>> 是的。是的。是的。
...
>> 好的。好吧，呃，我最好走了。
...
>> 是的，我认为那是最好的。
...
>> 好的。我稍后再跟你谈。
...
>> 好的。但不是关于这个。
...
>> 不，从来没有。 [笑声]
...
>> 从来没有。
...
>> 所以，呃，呃，
...
再见。
...
>> 没有触摸。不。[笑声]
...
[音乐]
...
>> 嘿，
...
>> 刚刚带回了您的视频。
...
>> 呃嘿，呃罗斯，看。呃我想我们
...
之前需要讲一下。
...
>> 不，不，我们不。
...
>> 是的，我们愿意。现在，看，这是最好的
...
我曾经小睡过。
...
我我不知道你在说什么
...
关于。
...
>> 来吧，承认吧。那是最好的午睡
...
你曾经拥有过。
...
>> 我吃过更好的了。 [笑声]
...
>> 好的。当
...
好吧。好的。这是最好的
...
曾经小睡过。我说过了。好的。但这是
...
结束了，乔伊。
...
[笑声]
...
>> 我想再做一次。
...
我们不能再这样做了。
...
>> 为什么不呢？
...
>> 因为这很奇怪。
...
[笑声]
...
>> 很好。
...
>> 你想喝点什么吗？
...
>> 当然。你有什么？
...
>> 热牛奶和 etan PM。
...
>> 男孩，我会告诉你判断的东西
...
让我付出了很多。
...
>> 是的。
...
>> 是的。考虑一下是否可以上楼
...
然后在沙发上小憩一下。
...
[笑声]
...
>> 为什么我会关心这个？
...
>> 没有理由。我只是说呃
...
这就是我要去的地方。
...
[笑声]
...
>> [笑声]
...
[音乐]
...
[笑声]
...
>> 睡个好觉。
...
>> 确实如此。
...
[清嗓子]
...
>> [欢呼]
...
[鼓掌]
...
[笑声]
...
>> 老兄，你到底在做什么？
...
[笑声]
...
>> 对不起。
...
我不相信这些疯狂的饮食，
...
你知道，凡事都要适度。
...
>> 你的松饼。
...
>> 呃，
...
>> 我会把它们带走
...
>> 给孩子们。 [笑声]
...
>> 哦，我知道我想问你什么了。你
...
几年前就参加过这个节目，然后他们
...
杀了你。那里发生了什么？
...
>> 这太愚蠢了。我在
中说了一些话
我真的不应该接受的采访
...
说过，但相信我，那不会
...
今天发生。
...
>> 明白了。
...
>> 那么，你当时说什么？
...
>> 我说过我
...
[笑声]
...
肥皂剧文摘采访我。
...
谢尔，这些是我的朋友。
...
>> 嗨，我是好朋友 Rachel Green。嗯，如果
...
你想要泥土，我就是你来的
...
到。这可能是乔伊的孩子。谁
...
知道吗？
...
>> 我只是在开玩笑。说真的，好朋友
...
雷切尔·格林。
...
>> 她刚刚失去了未出生的人的尊重
...
孩子。
...
>> 嗯，我要去加热一下
...
起来。好的，
...
>> 乔伊，你做得很好。
...
>> 是的，到目前为止还没有什么愚蠢的事情。
...
>> 曼托。不，谢谢。
...
>> 嘿乔，怎么了？
...
>> 坏消息。我看了录像并通过了
...
和我的老板一起，但他们不是
...
感兴趣。
...
>> 哦，
...
抱歉，伙计。
...
但是呃你看了录像带吗？
...
>> 是的，我我我喜欢它，
...
>> 但呃我的老板不同意。
...
...
的愚蠢儿子
[笑声]
...
你没有看录像。
...
>> 什么？我当然这么做了。
...
>> 听着，不选我是一回事，但
...
对我撒谎。
...
>> 我没有骗你。我看了。
...
>> 不，你又撒谎了。
...
>> 我看了。
...
>> 继续前进，皮诺曹。
...
[笑声]
...
>> 我做到了。
...
>> 不，你没有。
...
>> 我告诉你，我看了录像带。
...
>> 你看录像了吗？
...
>> 号
...
不敢相信乔伊，[音乐]
...
我讨厌被称为骗子。
...
>> 但你是个骗子。
...
>> 我刚才说什么？ [笑声]
...
>> 你还在吗？
...
>> 是的。我不得不说我不仅仅是
...
受伤了。当我告诉别人时我受到了侮辱
...
我做了一些事情。
...
>> 好的。好的。让我阻止你
...
就在那里。好的。首先你撒谎了，
...
对吗？然后你就撒谎了。好的。
...
然后你就撒谎了。
...
好的。所以在你撒谎之前
...
关于撒谎关于撒谎关于撒谎，
...
[笑声]
...
别再撒谎了。
...
你为什么这么确定我没有看这个
...
磁带？你想知道为什么吗？你想要
...
知道为什么吗？
...
>> 嗯，进展顺利。
...
>> 我通过以下方式知道您没有观看
...
磁带。好的。如果您看过
上的内容
这盘磁带，相信我，你会有
...
一些评论。好的。现在记住，
...
我为此获得了很多钱并且
...
仅在日本播出。
...
>>一番
...
[音乐]
...
一番男士唇膏。
...
一番男士唇膏。赛。
...
[笑声]
...
>> 这就是我知道你没有观看
...
磁带。
...
>> 他真的是一只变色龙。
...
>> 你好。
...
>> 你好。
...
>> 宝贝，
...
>> 乔伊。这是怎么回事？
...
>> 什么？
...
天哪。
...
>> 我知道它卡住了。
...
>> 爸爸，进展如何？
...
>> 我戴上它是为了吓唬钱德勒。
...
>> 天啊。莫妮卡完全会
...
吓坏了。
...
>> 好吧，那就帮我把它取下来吧。另外，
...
嗯，这里的味道真的很难闻。
...
>> 当然，味道很难闻。你有
...
你抬起头来是一只死去的动物。
...
>> [笑声]
...
>> 嘿。
...
>> 嘿。宝贝，你拿到火鸡了吗？哦天啊
...
上帝。我的天啊。
...
>> 那是谁？
...
>> 这是乔伊。 [笑声]
...
>> 什么？你在干什么？这是
...
应该很有趣吗？
...
>> 不，这不应该是有趣的。这是
...
应该很可怕。 [笑声]
...
>> 现在就让她下来。
...
>> 我不能。它被卡住了。
...
>> 我不在乎。那只火鸡必须
...
在我父母家养活 20 个人，
...
他们不会吃掉你的
...
头。 [笑声]
...
>> 等等。好吧，我就想想吧。
...
[笑声]
...
>> 好的，我明白了。菲比。好吧，你
...
拉。我将像
一样张开双腿
尽我所能。
...
>> 乔伊，现在还不是时候。
...
>> 抱歉，伙计们。
...
>> 好的，数到三。一二三。
...
[尖叫]
...
[笑声]
...
>> 成功了。我吓到你了。我就知道。
...
[笑声]
...
>> 我在这儿，大家伙。
...
>> 是的，你是。
...
>> 嘿，Ra。闪耀的你怎么样？
...
>> 哦，丹尼刚刚进了217号房间。
...
>> 哦，下一部分是最好的。当
...
浴缸里死去的女士。
...
>> 哦，不，不，不，不，不，不，不，不。来
...
开启。你会毁掉它的。
...
>> 好吧，我用代码说话。请记住
...
当孩子看到
中的两个空格时
走廊？
...
>> 太酷了。
...
>> 全空白和无空白都会使空白成为
...
空白 空白。
...
[笑声]
...
>> 哦，不。不，不。当杰克几乎
时结束
用那个空白杀死了他们所有人，但随后
...
在最后一秒他们逃脱了。
...
[笑声]
...
>> 乔伊，我不敢相信你竟然这么做了。
...
>> 我不敢相信她破解了你的密码。
...
好吧。好的。洛瑞向乔求婚
...
她拒绝了，尽管她仍然
...
爱上他了。然后他最终
...
与艾米结婚。
...
>> 嘿，我的是偶然的。
...
好吧。锅炉爆炸并且
...
摧毁了酒店并杀死了父亲。
...
>> 贝丝去世。
...
>> [欢呼]
...
>> 贝丝。
...
>> 贝丝去世。
...
>> 这是真的吗？如果我继续读下去，贝丝是
...
会死吗？
...
>> 不。贝丝没有死。她没有死。
...
她是吗，雷切尔？
...
>> 什么？
...
>> 乔伊问你是否刚刚毁了
...
他所爱的第一本书
...
明星杰克·尼科尔森。
...
大大的拥抱。再来一张。大大的拥抱。快点。
...
你好吗？ [笑声]
...
>> 呃，格林博士，你要去哪里？
...
>> 去拿我的外套。
...
>> 好的。好的。我可以得到我自己的
...
外套。
...
>> 抱歉，我们正处于高度紧张状态。
...
[笑声]
...
>> 哦，不。不。你不应该
...
这里是中转区。你
...
应该是这样，全错了。您应该
...
离开，你知道的。出去吧。
...
>> 或者您可能想要一杯奶油
...
[笑声]
...
必须前往我的城堡。
...
谢谢。
...
>> 哦，好吧。好吧，那么我想我们是
...
再次回到走廊。
...
>> 谢谢您的光临，格林女士。
...
>> [欢呼]
...
[鼓掌]
...
>> 好的，
...
你[笑]保重。
...
>> 哦，你们这些孩子。
...
[叹气]
...
好吧，[笑声]
...
这是我参加过的最好的派对
...
年。
...
谢谢。
...
>> [清喉咙]
...
>> 莫妮卡，
...
>> 现在几点了？
...
>> 呃，9。
...
[笑声]
...
>> 但外面已经黑了。
...
>> 嗯，好吧，那是因为你总是
...
睡到中午，傻瓜。
...
这就是九的样子。 [笑声]
...
>> 我想我会被洗掉的。
...
>> 观看日出。
...
>> 我真的厌倦了偷偷摸摸
...
一直存在。
...
>> 我知道。我也是。你知道。嘿，你知道
...
什么？如果我们整个
都离开怎么办？
周末？你知道，我们没有
...
打扰，我们可能会赤身裸体
...
一直。
...
>> 整个周末。这是很多
...
裸体。 [笑声]
...
>> 是的。我可以说我有一个
...
会议，您可以说您有一个
...
厨师的事情。哦，我一直想去
...
参加
举办的烹饪博览会
球衣。
...
>> 好的。你知道，你不是
...
准备好了。
...
>> 我们走吧。
...
>> 好的。等等，乔伊呢？
...
该死的罗洛斯。
...
嘿，你回来了。
...
>> 嘿，你的会议怎么样？
...
>> 太糟糕了。我和我的
战斗
同事，你知道，一直都是。
...
你在开玩笑吗？
...
>> 呃，所以你的周末彻底失败了。
...
>> 呃，不。我要去见唐纳德·特朗普
...
等待电梯。 [笑声]
...
[音乐]
...
嘿。
...
嘿，Bing 先生。你住的那家呃酒店
...
已调用
...
说有人把睫毛夹落在
...
你的房间。
...
>> 是的，那是我的。 [笑声]
...
>> 因为我认为你和一些
有联系
女孩，她把它留在那里。
...
>> 是的，这样更有意义。
...
[笑声]
...
你知道，我什至不觉得我
...
已经认识你了，伙计。好的。看，
...
我只想问你一次。
...
好吧，无论你说什么，我都会
...
相信你。
...
你是否是同性恋
...
游轮？ [笑声]
...
>> 嘿。嘿。
...
>> 嘿。
...
>> 哦，嘿，莫妮卡。我听说你看到了唐纳德
...
特朗普在您的大会上。
...
>> 是的。所以，我在等电梯。
...
[笑声]
...
>> 嘿，Ra。我可以借你的睫毛吗
...
卷发器？我想我失去了我的。
...
>> 是的。所以，[欢呼]
...
乔伊，我可以和你聊聊吗？
...
是的。
...
是的。
...
你和你。 [笑声]
...
>> 是的。但你不能告诉任何人。没有人
...
知道。
...
>> 怎么办？什么时候？
...
>> 事情发生在伦敦。
...
>> 在伦敦？
...
>> 我们没有告诉任何人的原因是
...
我们不想小题大做
...
它。
...
>> 但这是一件大事。
...
我必须告诉别人。
...
>> 你不能。 [笑声]
...
>> 请。请。我们只是不想
...
告诉所有人。好的。只需
...
保证你不会说出去。
...
>> 好的。
...
伙计，这太令人难以置信了。
...
我的意思是，这太棒了。但是
...
>> 我知道这很棒。 [笑声]
...
>> 哦，我不想看到这个。
...
哦，
...
>> 这些沙子是怎么回事？
...
>> 哦，是的。鲍勃说可能会发生洪水
...
伤害。
...
>> 要么就是这样，要么他有一只非常大的猫。
...
>> 好吧，其他人都只有
...
最佳时间？
...
嘘。
...
>> 乔伊睡着了。
...
在
之后
他昏倒了，我们把沙子放在周围
...
他让他保持温暖。
...
>> 好吧，我想这对幸福的夫妇不是
...
还没起来。你们上次听到了吗
...
晚？
...
>> 哦，是的。我不知道它们是什么
...
正在做，但在某一时刻，海龟
...
实际上来到了房子。
...
>> 早上好。
...
>> 嘿。
...
>> 嘿。大家睡得怎么样？
...
>> 哦，太棒了。
...
>> 就像 lo。
...
>> 我们也是。
...
>> 我们要去散步。
...
>> 早上好。顺便说一下，呼吸很好。
...
[笑声]
...
>> 嘿，伙计。
...
>> 所以，我刚刚与其中一位决斗者交谈过
今天
位作家。还有
...
>> 什么是决斗？
...
>> 我们生命中的日子。
...
无论如何，你都不会相信。
...
我的角色正在从昏迷中苏醒。
...
>> 不仅如此，我还得到了
...
新大脑。
...
[笑声]
...
>> 所以，工作中正在发生伟大的事情
...
以及您的个人生活。
...
>> 等等，你得到
是什么意思
新大脑？
...
>> 哦，好吧，他们正在杀死其中一个
节目中的
个角色，以及当她
...
去世，她的大脑正在移植
...
进入我的身体。
...
[笑声]
...
>> 什么？脑移植？这是
...
荒谬。
...
>> 好吧，我认为你这很荒谬
...
已经三年半没有做爱了
...
个月。
...
>> 现在是冬天。
上的人较少
街道。 [笑声]
...
>> 他们要杀谁？
...
>> 呃塞西莉亚梦露。她扮演杰西卡
...
锁心。
...
>> 号
...
>> 她很擅长在
里扔饮料
个人的面孔。我的意思是，我不认为
...
我曾见过她喝完一杯饮料。
...
还有她总是打别人耳光的方式
...
时间。你难道不想这样做吗
...
一次？
...
>> 哦，伙计。 [笑声]
...
>> 她一直在节目中。这是
...
真的很难满足她
...
鞋。
...
>> 是的。是的。帮帮我吧。当你
...
当你从大脑中出来时
...
移植，
...
你会成为她吗？
...
>> 是的，但是在德雷克·雷莫的身体里。
...
[笑声]
...
>> 为什么这对你来说这么难得到？我
...
以为你是一名科学家。我很
...
很高兴你救了罗斯和汽车
...
适得其反，但它可能是
...
子弹，你知道，你没有尝试
...
来救我。
...
[呻吟]
...
>> 哦，你很沮丧，因为你认为我
...
选择了罗斯而不是你。不，我认识你
...
可以照顾好自己。你知道，我
...
意思是，罗斯，他需要帮助。他不是
...
像我们一样的街道。
...
>> 归根结底，你会冒
的风险
你为罗斯而活，先于你为
而活
我。这就是底线，
...
不是吗？不，不完全是。好吧，
...
看看。我并不是想拯救罗斯，
...
可以吗？
...
我的三明治在罗斯旁边。 [笑声]
...
好的。
...
我想拯救我的三明治
...
来自子弹。
...
我知道这没有多大意义。
...
>> 很有道理。
...
>> 钱德勒，这是本能。好的。我只是
...
就这么做了。所以，你冒着生命危险
...
三明治。我知道这听起来很疯狂，
...
但是钱德勒，这是最伟大的
世界上
三明治。 [笑声]
...
>> 所以，你没有呃在我之前选择了罗斯。
...
>> 不，我永远不会那样做。你你是
...
就像我哥哥一样。
...
>> 真的吗？
...
>> 是的。事实上，为了证明你有多少
...
对我来说意味着
...
在这里。
...
>> 谢谢。哦。哦，简单。这不是热门
...
狗。
...
[笑声]
...
这有多好？
...
>> 哦，
...
看看。
...
>> 嗯。
...
>> 嘿，伙计。你在干什么？
...
我以为你在向我展示我有多少
...
对你来说意味着什么。是的。咬一口。
...
[笑声]
...
>> 天啊。
...
>> 我错过了吗？我错过了吗？
...
>> 不。不。我就在这个人后面
...
开枪自杀。
...
>> 哇哦。她很漂亮。
...
>> 是的。哦，她也很好。
...
她教会了我如何
...
使用相机并闻到
...
放屁表演。
...
>> 对不起。什么？
...
就好像你有很多台词要学
...
速度太快，有时您需要一分钟
...
记住您的下一个。所以虽然
...
你想起来了，你就拿这么大
...
在你看起来很紧张的地方暂停一下，你
...
知道，就像这样。
...
>> 好的。
...
>> 哦，这是我的场景。这是我的场景。
...
>> 华莱士夫人。
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>> 是的。
...
>> 我是 Dr. Drake Remor，你妹妹的
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神经外科医生。
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>> 是的。
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>> 告诉我，她会好吗？
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>> 情况恐怕还要多
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比我们预想的可怕。
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你姐姐患有
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颅下血肿。
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也许我们可以进一步讨论这个问题
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咖啡。
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[笑声]
...
哦，太好了。
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>> 是的，谢天谢地。
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>> 你知道，有一分钟我想
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你实际上是想闻一下
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一些东西。
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[笑声]
...
>> 哦，是的。看，有一件作品
...
上没有地板。
...
>> 站在你这边。
...
>> 来吧。
...
[笑声]
...
>> 好吧。我们有什么？
...
>> [音乐]
[英语]
Show
重点词汇
开始练习
| 词汇 | 含义 |
|---|---|
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comfortable /ˈkʌmfərtəbl/ B1 |
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comfortable /ˈkʌmfərtəbl/ B1 |
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comfortable /ˈkʌmfərtəbl/ B1 |
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comfortable /ˈkʌmfərtəbl/ B1 |
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comfortable /ˈkʌmfərtəbl/ B1 |
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comfortable /ˈkʌmfərtəbl/ B1 |
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comfortable /ˈkʌmfərtəbl/ B1 |
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comfortable /ˈkʌmfərtəbl/ B1 |
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comfortable /ˈkʌmfərtəbl/ B1 |
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leather /ˈlɛðər/ A2 |
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tops /tɒps/ A2 |
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theater /ˈθiːətər/ B1 |
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crazy /ˈkreɪzi/ A2 |
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genius /ˈdʒiːniəs/ B2 |
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character /ˈkærəktər/ B1 |
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character /ˈkærəktər/ B1 |
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重点语法结构
-
I love your car.
➔ 一般现在时 – 主语 + 动词（现在时）+ 宾语，用于陈述事实或习惯。
➔ 动词 "love" 表示对车的现在时情感。
-
Yeah, it's not mine.
➔ 缩写 "it's" = "it is"；否定句在动词后使用 "not"。
➔ "it's" 是 "it is" 的缩写，"not" 使句子变为否定。
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She tops out at 130.
➔ 短语动词 "tops out at" 意为“达到最高”，使用一般现在时。
➔ "tops out at" 表示她能达到的最高速度。
-
I found the keys and now I'm just polishing her up.
➔ 过去式 "found" + 连词 "and" + 现在进行时 "I'm polishing"；过去动作与当前进行动作的对比。
➔ "found"（过去式）说明之前发生的事；"I'm polishing"（现在进行时）说明此刻正在进行的动作。
-
Could I have my keys?
➔ 情态动词 "could" + 主语 + 动词原形，用于礼貌请求；倒装形成疑问句。
➔ "Could" 使请求更礼貌，主语 "I" 因倒装而位于动词 "have" 前。
-
On a scale from 1 to 10, 10 being the dumbest a person can look, you are definitely 19.
➔ 介词短语 "on a scale from 1 to 10"；分词短语 "10 being..."；副词 "definitely" 用于强调。
➔ "definitely" 强调说话者对判断的确定性。
-
If you had seen what was on this tape, you would have some comments.
➔ 第三条件句：if + 过去完成时 "had seen"；结果从句使用 "would have" + 名词短语。
➔ "had seen"（过去完成时）表示未实现的过去条件；"would have" 表示想象中的结果。
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What is an appropriate amount of time to wait before you make a move?
➔ 间接疑问句以 "what is" 开头；名词短语 "an appropriate amount of time"；不定式短语 "to wait" 作为补足成分。
➔ "to wait" 表示所描述的 "时间量" 的目的。
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I can't believe you didn't watch the tape.
➔ 情态动词 "can't" + 动词 "believe"（现在时），过去否定 "didn't watch"，表示惊讶。
➔ "can't" 表示强烈的不相信，"didn't watch" 说明实际未发生的事。
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We need to get up early for a commercial audition tomorrow.
➔ 情态动词 "need to" + 动词原形表示必要性；"tomorrow" 指未来；"for a commercial audition" 为目的短语。
➔ "need to" 表示义务；"tomorrow" 将动作定位在近期的未来。
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