– 英语/中文 双语歌词

歌词与翻译

[中文]

你得到的不是拉尔夫

劳伦的任何东西？

[笑声]

>> 是的，我不这么认为，乔。

>> 好吧，我想这会没问题的。

[笑声]

>> 嘿，听着。呃，你今晚

在做什么？

>> 没那么多。

>> 如果删除我的

助理标签，您感觉如何？我来付钱。

>> 我不得不说，我要花很多

钱才能和

一个男人出去约会。

>> 我不是要你去和

他约会。

>> 真的吗？因为我可以使用

的钱。 [笑声]

>> Joey，他是新来的，我

知道他没有任何男性朋友。

带他去喜欢球赛或者

什么的。我真的很感激。

>> 是的。好的。当然。没问题。

>> 谢谢。

>> 哦。嘿，甜甜圈。

>> 是的。

>> 乔伊。嗯，你看起来很熟悉。呃

你在电视上吗？好吧，乔伊

不喜欢谈论它，但他是

《Days of Our Lives》的明星之一。

[笑声]

>> 没错。这是正确的。你

不扮演女人吗？ [笑声]

>> 男人身体里的女人。

>> 好多了。

[笑声]

>> 所以，你知道，罗斯，这很有趣，因为你

我也看起来很熟悉。你

结过婚吗？ [笑声]

>> 嗯，是的。是的，我有。事实上，嗯，

就在前几天，克里斯和我正在

谈论我如何结婚以及

我如何拥有一个儿子。

>> 是的，小埃里克。

>> 没错。等等，不，本。 [笑声]

>> 那么，你刚刚结婚过一次

吗？ [笑声]

>> 好吧，嗯，

>> 你结过两次婚。

>> 是的。

之后又

。

孩子，我饿了。

呃，嘿乔伊，你有没有在约会时

那么饿，以至于当女孩

去洗手间时，你吃了她的一些

食物？ [笑声]

>> 你说服务员吃了我哭的蛋糕。

[笑声]

>> 是的。那么，呃，罗斯，为什么

第一次婚姻会破裂？嗯。

是因为该女子是异性恋还是

因为她是女同性恋？

[笑声]

>> 你们两个认识吗？

>> 不。不。不。

>> 罗斯似乎是那种

的人，他会娶一个即将成为女同性恋的女人，然后将她推向

...

的边缘。

>> 我们应该盛装打扮，去

广场喝香槟。

>> 哦，好吧。

>> 但我我不能呆太久。我必须

早起参加明天

的商业试镜，而且我必须看起来不错。

应该扮演一个 19 岁的人。

[笑声]

>> 什么？

>> 那么，当你说早起时，

是指 1986 年吗？

>> 你们不觉得我看起来像19岁吗？

[笑声]

>> 哦，19。我们以为你说的是​​ 90。

[笑声]

>> 好吧，大家走吧。我们走吧。

>> 好的。

>> [笑声]

[笑声]

>> SUP。 [笑声]

>> SUP，伙计。

拿走你想要的任何东西。只是请

不要伤害我。 [笑声]

这就像玩一个小 PlayStation，

吧？

太棒了。

[笑声]

PlayStation 很糟糕。 [笑声]

与 PlayStation 底槽一起享用。

[笑声]

嗯？

来吧。我是19岁还是什么？

>> 是的。从 1 到 10，10 是

一个人看起来最愚蠢的，你

绝对是 19。

>> 来吧，伙计。真的吗？几岁了？

>> 年轻。你是个男孩子。好的，现在去

换衣服吧，因为大家都准备好了。

请保留我的

内衣。 [笑声]

>> 哦，谢谢。

>> 好的，

>> 现在我可以通过 19 了，对吧？ [笑声]

>> 是的，你可以冒充 19。

>> 真的吗？

>> 是的。

>> 认真的吗？严重地？严重地？不。

好的。你可以扮演你自己的年龄，

是 31 岁。

[笑声]

>> 我 30 岁。

>> 乔伊，你不是。你31岁了。

哦糟糕。

>> 钱德勒、莫妮卡、菲比、瑞秋、

>> 我 40 岁了。天哪。

>> 看看你拿着你的小枫糖浆

奖。

>> 是的。也许你不要告诉任何人

这件事。

>> 不，这没什么大不了的。我也用我的洗发水瓶这样做

。

>> 真的吗？是的。

>> 您正在为什么奖项而练习？

>> 格莱美。

>> 最佳新人艺术家。

[笑声]哦，嘿，听着。 Soapies

人今天致电并获得

颁发奖项。

>> 噢，太好了。所以，即使你没有获胜，你也一定会

登上舞台。

[笑声]

>> 你你不认为我会赢吗？

>> 哦，我当然知道。

>> 但你可能应该开始练习

你那优雅的失败者表情，你知道，

当摄像机对着你时

你想要看起来很失望，但

也认为你的同事应该获​​胜，

你知道吗？所以，有点像

>> [掌声]

>> 嘿，

>> 你知道

>> 你也在格莱美上练习失败吗？

>> 哦，不。在格莱美颁奖典礼上，我总是获胜。

>> 嘿，伙计们。

>> 嘿，亲爱的。

>> 准备好了吗？

>> 是的，当然。哦，我把钱包落在

莫妮卡家了。我马上回来。

>> 等一下。

>> 什么？

那一个继续前进。

哇。你和菲比，是吗？您

外出多久了？

>> 一个多月了。

>> 哇。也许呃也许你和我应该

更好地了解彼此。

>> 当然，我愿意。

>> 是的。那么，呃

你叫什么名字？ [笑声]

>> 这是杰克。

>> 乔伊。

>> 嘿，杰克。呃，你喜欢尼克斯队吗？

>> 是的，超级粉丝。

>> 我也是。周二有一场比赛。你

想去吗？是的，那就太好了。让

我确保星期二

我没有做任何事情。

[笑声]

>> 嘿，

>> 听着。你知道，当你

穿着裤子并且身体前倾时，我

看看你的内衣吗？

>> 是的。 [笑声]

>> 好吧，当杰克这样做时，我看到他

穿着女士内衣。

>> 我知道。他们是我的。

哦，[笑声]

>> 不。不，等等。这很奇怪。

>> 不，不是。我们只是闲逛

，我鼓励他试穿。

>> 这很奇怪。

>> 我现在穿着他的内裤。

>> 有点热。

>> 我也这么认为。

>> 还有那个小翻盖。非常适合容纳

我的口红。

[笑声]

>> 是的，我不知道这一点。

而且你知道，杰克说女士

内衣实际上更舒适。

他喜欢丝绸

贴在皮肤上的感觉。

>> 是的。好吧，接下来你就会知道，他会

告诉你，你的高跟鞋

对他的姿势有好处。

>> 杰克没有任何问题。好的。

他是个凡人。我比你想得更多

。

>> 哦，是的。穿着粉色鞋带的他看起来就像一个真正的伐木工人

。

我只是说，只有一个男人

完全确信自己的男子气概

才能穿着女性内衣到处走动。

我认为你永远做不到。

>> 嘿，我对自己的男子气概很自信。

>> 好吧，无论如何。

>> 你已经看过我的一大堆色情片了，

对吧？

[音乐]

[笑声]

>> [笑声]

>> 是的。

[笑声]

[笑声]

>> 嘿，菲布斯。

>> 嘿

看看。

>> 啊？

[欢呼]

>> 我到底有多男人？

>> 哇。好的。很有男子气概，而且有点

...

>> 你知道，我开始明白杰克

在说什么了。

>> 丝绸的手感非常好。

>> 是的。而且事情并没有像我想象的那样

被摧毁。

太棒了，乔。

>> 是的。与男士内衣相比，您有更多的选择

。

比基尼、法式剪裁、丁字裤和和

布料。你有棉质、丝绸、蕾丝，还有

你知道吗？我一直想知道

关于

>> 内裤锄头。你知道，他们从你的脚趾开始

，然后一直

一直到

[笑声]

>> 我应该把它们脱下来，不是吗？

>> 我认为你这样做很重要。

>> 感觉好点了吗？

>> 是的。很多。

听着，呃，并不是说我，你知道，

对自己的男子气概或其他什么缺乏安全感，

你知道，但是呃，我想我需要

和一个像现在这样的女人交往。

>> 是的，我明白了。

>> 是的。好的。

>> 嘿。你好。

>>嗨。

>> 你知道，你看起来很眼熟。我在什么地方认识

你吗？

>> 我不这么认为。

>> 也许是因为我在电视上。

>> [笑声]

>> 我是《Days of Our Lives》的演员。

>> 哇。

>> 真的吗？

>> 嗯。

>> 450，请。

>> 哦，让我拿这个。

[笑声]

>> 这些是给你的。

>> 好吧，如果我们今天学到一件事，

奶酪，那就是啦啦队和高

炸药不能混合。

>> [笑声]

>> 你不能再玩这个了，Mac。

>> 好吧，如果没有

你，我就不可能做到这一点，伙计。你是个天才。

>> 哦，是吗？那么，为什么我无法

让我的录像机在 12:00 停止闪烁？

那么，你们觉得怎么样？

[笑声]

>> 嘿，拿着电话。

>> 请稍等。给你妈妈看看。

妈妈。

>> 哇。那么，你觉得怎么样？

>> 好吧，

没关系。

>> 这不是最好的。这是有史以来最糟糕的事情之一。{50} [笑声]

...

不仅仅是在电视上。

>> 我们要告诉他什么？

>> 嗯，灯光还不错。

>> 哦，不，你不知道。您上次

次点亮了。灯光是我的。

>> 我有服装。

>> 哦，太棒了。这意味着我被困住了所以，

我们在那里看着你，而你

就坐在这里。哇哦。

>> 当一个男人和他的男朋友分手时

女朋友，在采取

多长的时间才合适？

行动之前需要等待

>> 哦，我想说大约一个月。真的吗？我

说三到四。

>> 半小时。

[笑声]

>> 有趣。 [笑声]

>> 当它是你的助手时，我会说

永远不会。好吧，拉。最重要的问题

是，他喜欢你吗？正确的？因为如果

他不喜欢你，这就是一个

点。

啊？哞点？

>> 是的。这就像牛的意见一样。

这并不重要。

是哞。

>> [笑声]

>> 我是不是和他住在一起太久了

还是这一切都有意义？

[笑声]

>> 请不要听乔伊的话。好的。

你会看他吗？我的意思是，他

显然很沮丧。他离开了他的

家人。他要和

个陌生人一起过感恩节。他现在需要的是

让你成为他的朋友。哦，你是

是对的。对不起。谢谢。好的，

这就是我要做的。

>> 很好。听取他们的建议。

当

包如此漂亮时，没有人会听我的。没有人关心

里面有什么。 [笑声]

>> 你好。

>> 嘿。哇。他们看起来都

玩得很开心，不是吗？

>> 嘿，那么我的父母要去哪里

？

>> 哦，让我们看看。好吧，如果这是

婚礼大厅，那么嗯，你的父母就会

在皇后区的家里。

[笑声]

>> 什么？他们没有被邀请。哦，不。

太糟糕了。他们将会被

压垮。

>> 他们为什么会认为自己被邀请了？

你抓住了我。我不知道。 [笑声]

>> 乔伊，

>> 对不起。听着，我以为父母

会来。你知道，你的父母要

来。 Jayla 的父母要来了。

罗斯的父母来了。 [笑声]

>> 罗斯的父母就是我的父母。

>> 好吧，看，家长来了。

[笑声]

>> 你知道，我认为我们应该邀请他们。

>> 哦，拜托。您只是想要更多蓝色

笔。

>> 好吧，这真是令人悲伤。

>> 试镜非常顺利。

>> 这是做什么用的？哦，这是一部

预算期大电影，讲述了这三个

意大利兄弟在世纪之交

来到美国的故事。

真的很优雅。哦，导演

应该是下一个马丁

斯科塞塞。

[笑声]

>> 下一个下一个？

>> 是的，这个来自芝加哥的家伙

应该是下一个马丁

斯科塞塞，[笑声]

但这个家伙就在他之后。

>> 你好，

>> 乔伊。这是埃斯特尔。我刚刚与

选角人员交谈过。他们爱你。

>> 他们爱我。

>> 是的。他们希望明天再次见到您

。

>> 天哪。

>> 只有一件事。您对正面全裸有

问题吗？

[笑声]

>> 你在开玩笑吗？如果没有它，我从来不会租电影

。 [笑声]

>> 哦。

呃，好吧。呃，我可以给你回电话吗？

>> 怎么了？他们希望我在电影中

全裸。

>> 哇。

>> 我知道。我祖母会看到

这个。

>> 奶奶得排队了。

>> 嘿，你们今天在做什么？

>> 为邻居制作节日糖果。

>> 对不起。 WHO？

>> 我要把这个篮子挂在

门上，然后当邻居

经过时，他们都可以拿一块。

>> 但我们不认识邻居。

>> 我愿意。呃，让我们看看留着

胡子的家伙。

女士抽烟很多。 [笑声] 孩子们，我

见过一个红头发的家伙，他不喜欢

被称为Rusty。

>> 看，这正是我制作

糖果的原因。我们可以了解他们的名字并通过

认识我们的邻居。

>> 如果我们搬家不是更容易吗？

所以，我今天刚刚和一位决斗

作家交谈过。

>> 什么是决斗？

>> 我们生命中的日子。

>> 无论如何，你都不会相信。

我的角色正在从昏迷中苏醒。

>> 不仅如此，我还获得了

新大脑。

>> 所以，工作

和您的个人生活中正在发生伟大的事情。 [笑声]

>> 等等，你的

新大脑是什么意思？

>> 好吧，他们正在杀死节目中的

角色之一，当她

死亡时，她的大脑将

移植到我的身体中。 [笑声]

>> 什么？脑移植？这

很荒谬。哦，我认为

你已经三个半月没有做爱了，这很荒谬。

。

>> 现在是冬天。

街上的人少了。

[笑声]

>> 他们要杀谁？

>> 呃塞西莉亚梦露。她扮演杰西卡

洛克哈特。

>> 没有。

>> 没有。 [笑声]

>> 她很擅长把饮料泼到

个人脸上。我的意思是，我认为

我从来没有见过她喝完一杯饮料。

>> 还有她总是

打人的方式。您不想这样做

一次吗？

>> 我会做的。

>> 天哪，她一直在节目中。

要填补她的

的空缺真的很难。

>> 是的。是的。帮帮我吧。当你

当你从大脑

移植出来时，

>>你会成为她吗？

>> 是的，但是在 Drake Raor 的身体里。

[笑声]

>> 为什么这对你来说这么难得到？我

以为你是一名科学家。 [笑声]

>> [鼓掌]

>> 我还没见过任何葡萄牙人。我

还没有完美的吻。而且我

还没有去过狙击手学校。

>> 小偷们，等等。听。呃，

闭上眼睛。

也许这是您可以从列表中划掉

的一件事。

>> 哦，是的。

>> 颁发最喜爱

回归男性角色奖的是Mackenzie。

>> 就是这样。这是我的类别。

>> 天啊。你有发言权吗？

>> 是的。我的演讲收到了

>> 你有你那张优雅的失败者面孔吗？

>> 是的。

>> 不，查理。请记住，如果你赢了，你

必须拥抱我。你拥抱我。

>> 好的。他们说，

>> “我可以在电视上捏捏你的屁股[笑声]

>> 吗？”

>> 证明这并不总是

>> 最喜欢的回归男性

角色的类别。提名者是来自 General Hospital 的约翰·惠勒

、[掌声]

来自 The Young and the

Restless 的 Gavin Graham、[掌声] 来自 Passions 的

Duncan Harrington、

[掌声] 以及来自 Days of

Our Lives 的 Joey Triani。

[掌声] 苏菲去了《年轻人和

加文·格雷厄姆。

焦躁不安的人》中的

>> 哇哦！

>> 《虎胆龙威》仍然很棒。

>> 是的。

>> 嘿，你觉得我们让它成为双重

功能怎么样？

>> 您还租什么？

>> 《虎胆龙威》也是如此。

乔伊，这又是《虎胆龙威》了。

[笑声]

>> 好吧，我们看第二遍，是

《虎胆龙威 2》。

>> 乔伊，我们刚刚看了它，

>> 很高兴能再次看到它。

>> 是的，《虎胆龙威》。

>> 老兄，你没有说《虎胆龙威》。

>> 一切都好吗？ [笑声]

>> 是的，我刚刚有了计划。

>> 嗯，约翰·姆兰有计划。

现在，你看，我想在乔伊工作完毕

离开这里

开始给大家打电话之前

>> 你在说什么，

[笑声]

[笑声]

>> [掌声和欢呼]

>> 发生了什么？

>> 我不知道。 [笑声]

你睡着了。仅此而已。

>> 是的。是的。是的。

>> 好吧。好吧，呃，我最好回家了。

>> 是的。我认为那是最好的。

>> 好的。我稍后再跟你谈。

>> 好的。但不是关于这个。

>> 不，从来没有。

>> 从来没有。

>> 那么，呃呃

再见。

>> 没有触摸。没有触摸。

>> [音乐]

[笑声]

>> 嘿，

>> 刚刚带回了你的视频。

>> 呃嘿，呃罗斯，看。呃，我认为我们

之前需要讨论一下。

>> 不，不，我们不。

>> 是的，我们愿意。现在，看，这是我睡过的最好的

小睡。

>> [笑声]

>> 我我不知道你在说什么

。

来吧，承认吧。那是你睡过的最好的午睡

。 [笑声]

>> 我吃过更好的了。

>> 好的。当

好的。好的。这是有史以来最好的

小睡。我说过了。好的。但一切都

结束了，乔伊。

[笑声]

>> 我想再做一次。

>> [欢呼和掌声]

[笑声]

>> 我们不能再这样做了。

>> 为什么不呢？

>> 因为这很奇怪。

[笑声]

>> 很好。

>> 你想喝点什么吗？

>> 当然。你有什么？

>> 热牛奶等。

>> 孩子，我告诉你，评判

的事情让我付出了很大的努力。

>> 是的。

>> 是的。考虑一下也许可以上楼

，在沙发上小睡一会儿。

[笑声]

>> 为什么我会关心这个？

>> 没有理由。我只是说呃

那就是我要去的地方。 [笑声]

>> [笑声]

>> 睡个好觉。确实如此。

>> [欢呼和掌声]

[笑声]

>> 老兄，你到底在做什么？

[欢呼]

[笑声]

>> 对不起。

>> [欢呼]

>> 你们呃找到有人嫁给你们

了吗？

>> 不，但是莫妮卡部长很饥渴，打电话给

>> 想知道我们是否还

在一起。

>> 我们永远找不到任何人。

>> 好吧，那就让我来吧，

>> 乔。

>> 不，不，不。听着，我一直在想

。我是演员，对吧？因此，我

在

个人面前讲话不会感到紧张。我不会吐口水，也不会盯着

莫妮卡的胸部。

你知道，每个人都知道我是个混蛋。

确实如此。

>> 是的。最重要的是

那里不会有陌生人

几乎不认识你。将会是我。我

发誓我会做得非常好。另外，

你知道，我爱你们，而且

对我来说真的意义重大。

>> 可能有点酷。

>> 那么，我能做到吗？

>> 是的，你能做到。

>> 好的。你真的没有得到[笑声]

。

>> 好的。好的。我要开始我的

演讲了。哦，等一下。

互联网部长仍然可以发生性行为，

对吗？

>> 我正在航行。

>> 我不想谈论我们。

[笑声] 你知道，

>> 你至少可以为我节省一整块

COOKIE。

>> 不，不，不。 [笑声]

>> 女人都是卑鄙的。

>> 不敢相信我会见到

杰西卡。阿什利，

>> 等等。请冷静一点，好吗？我和

这个女人一起工作。

>> 好吧，我完全没问题。好的，

>> 进来。

>> 嘿，杰西卡。

>> 嘿，杰西。

>> 这是我的朋友雷切尔。

>>嗨。这是怎么回事？

[笑声]

>> 呃，听着。这是你的奖杯。我

替你接受了。

>> 天啊。我赢了。你知道

这意味着什么吗？

[笑声]

>> 就是这样。您不会

您不会将任何东西放在架子上或

？不，我尝试将其保留为

个真正的奖项。现在，请原谅，

>> 收回它。

>> 绝对。

>> 是的。

>> 是的，你知道。

>> 试试这些，看看我们是否能

更好地了解什么是有效的。

>> 谢谢。你真是个好朋友。

这太奇怪了。 [笑声]

噢。

>> 牙签。

>> 是的。

[笑声]

>> 你现在想穿什么？

>> 水果卷起来

>> 和

>> 美味。

[笑声]

>> 乔伊，

>> 等一下。等一下。我们有

获胜者。

>> 什么？哪一个？

>> 傻哥们。

>> 不再那么傻了。

>> [音乐]

>> 最酷的是这个角色来自

那不勒斯，对吧？

>> 是的。

>> 我的全家都来自那不勒斯。

>> 太棒了。好的。好吧，我已经听到了

我需要听到的一切。

我们只需要呃

莱斯利。

>> 呃乔伊，这是尴尬的部分。

>> 哦，嘿。正确的。不是问题。我完全

明白了。你需要，你知道，

确保我没有任何可怕的疤痕或

纹身。别担心，

>> 我没有什么可隐瞒的。

那么，就这样吧。这就是我。 100%

天然。

[欢呼]

>> 你来了。好的。我想通了

。我要拿两张

八张桌子。我将添加您的父母，

我将把它们变成三张表，每张表

六张。好的。我打电话给餐饮承办商。我

加了两顿额外的饭菜。我们很高兴

出发。

>> 是的。是的，他们不会来了。

>> 什么？

>> 不知何故，他们认为你

只是因为我才邀请他们的。他们觉得

有点不受欢迎。

>> 哦，那太糟糕了。这是真的。但也

太糟糕了。

>> 看。妈妈，如果您能打电话给我的

妈妈就好了。

>> 哦，乔伊。

>> 来吧。听着，只要让她知道

你真的希望他们在那里。

别忘了，这位女士多年来

给您寄了很多烤宽面条。

>> 不，她没有。

>> 如果其中一些没有

到达你身边，这是她的错吗？ [笑声]

我要说什么？

>> 我不知道。只是呃，告诉他们

邀请函混淆了

或不，不，不。归咎于

邮局。他们讨厌邮局和

爱尔兰人，[笑]但我不认为

你可以把这归咎于他们。所以，

你好。是的。嗨，特里瓦尼夫人。嗨，

这是莫妮卡·盖勒。是的，我

打电话只是想告诉你，钱德勒和我

真的希望你能参加

婚礼。是的。显然，我们发送的

一堆邀请未

送达。嗯，我猜有一些

在该死的邮局搞砸了。

告诉我吧。 [笑声]

是的。是的。美国邮局。不，更像

，比如美国失去了办公室。 [笑声]

它们是什么？爱尔兰人？

>> 有一段时间了，嗯？嗯，这很有趣。

这些大厅看起来比

以前要小。

>> 这是一座不同的建筑。

毒品。

>> 前锋拉奥尔，嗯？您希望我

什么时候开始？

>> 我们为什么不现在就开始呢？

>> 好的。

这是试镜场景。

[笑声]

>> 试镜？我以为你会

给我这个角色。你为什么会这么想

？好吧，我是 Drake Remores 博士，

Striker 的双胞胎兄弟，他看起来比我更像

，对吧？ [笑声]

每个人都必须试镜。

你知道，特里，我真的不需要

来做这件事。我和机器人一起有了自己的有线电视系列

。

>> 对不起，乔伊。就是这样

就是这样。好吧，

我想你认为自己很特别，

吧？坐在你那漂亮的小

大厅里，[笑声]

让明星为你跳圈，

吧？嗯，你知道吗？

>> [笑声]

>> 这是一颗有箍的星星。

这是一个明星，这个箍这个箍。

>> 我是博士。德雷克纪念馆。

>> 但我一直在想，如果你们两个真的勾搭上了

会发生什么。

，

>> 亲爱的，晚餐准备好了。

[欢呼]

>> 今晚我的小厨师给我准备了什么

？你最喜欢的。

>> 奶酪油炸食品。

>> 是的。还有很多。

>> 谢谢，亲爱的。

>> 你想去吗？

>> 是的。开始了。开始了。

你好吗？

[英语]

You get anything that's not Ralph

Lauren?

[laughter]

>> Yeah, I don't think so, Joe.

>> All right, I guess this will be fine.

[laughter]

>> Hey, listen. Uh, what are you what are

you doing tonight?

>> Not that much.

>> How would you feel about taking out my

assistant tag? I'll pay.

>> I got to say, it's going to take a lot

of money for me to go out on a date with

a dude.

>> I'm not asking you to go on a date with

him.

>> Really? cuz I could kind of use the

money. [laughter]

>> Joey, just just He's new in town and I

know he doesn't have any guy friends.

Just take him to like a ball game or

something. I'd really appreciate it.

>> Yeah. Okay. Sure. No problem.

>> Thank you.

>> Ooh. Hey, donuts.

>> Yeah.

>> Joey. Um, you look familiar. Are uh are

you on TV or something? Well, Joey

doesn't like to talk about it, but he's

one of the stars of Days of Our Lives.

[laughter]

>> That's right. That's right. Don't you

play a woman? [laughter]

>> A woman in a man's body.

>> Much better.

[laughter]

>> So, you know, Ross, it's funny cuz you

look familiar to me, too. Have you ever

been married? [laughter]

>> Well, yes. Yes, I have. In fact, um,

just the other day, Chris and I were

talking about how I've been married and

how I have a son.

>> Yeah, little Eric.

>> That's right. Wait, no, Ben. [laughter]

>> So, you just been married the one time

then? [laughter]

>> Well, um,

>> you've been married twice.

>> Yes.

And

another time after that.

Boy, I'm getting hungry.

Uh, hey Joey, have you ever been so

hungry on a date that when the girl goes

to the bathroom, you ate some of her

food? [laughter]

>> You said the waiter ate my cried cake.

[laughter]

>> Yeah. So, uh, Ross, now why did that

first marriage break up? Hm.

Was it because the woman was straight or

because she was a lesbian?

[laughter]

>> Do you two know each other?

>> No. No. No.

>> Just seems like Ross is the kind of guy

who would marry a woman on the verge of

being a lesbian and then push her over

the edge.

>> We should all get dressed up and go to

have champagne at the plaza.

>> Oh, okay.

>> But I I I can't stay too long. I got to

get up early for a commercial audition

tomorrow and I got to look good.

supposed to be playing a 19-year-old.

[laughter]

>> What?

>> So, when you said get up early, did you

mean 1986?

>> You guys don't think I look 19?

[laughter]

>> Oh, 19. We thought you said 90.

[laughter]

>> Okay, everybody, LET'S GO. LET'S GO.

>> OKAY.

>> [laughter]

[laughter]

>> SUP. [laughter]

>> SUP, DUDE.

Take whatever you want. Just please

don't hurt me. [laughter]

It's like playing a little PlayStation,

huh?

That's whack.

[laughter]

PlayStation is whack. [laughter]

Sup with the whack PlayStation sump.

[laughter]

Huh?

Come on. Am I 19 or what?

>> Yes. On a scale from 1 to 10, 10 being

the dumbest a person can look, you are

definitely 19.

>> Come on, man. Really? How old?

>> Young. You're a manchild. Okay, now go

get changed because everybody's ready.

And please, oh, please keep my

underwear. [laughter]

>> Oh, thanks.

>> Okay,

>> now I can pass for 19, right? [laughter]

>> Yes, you can pass for 19.

>> Really?

>> Yes.

>> Seriously? Seriously? Seriously? No.

Okay. You can play your own age, which

is 31.

[laughter]

>> I'm 30.

>> Joey, you are not. You're 31.

Oh crap.

>> Chandler, Monica, Phoebe, Rachel,

>> I'm 40. Jeez.

>> Look at you with your little maple syrup

award.

>> Yeah. May maybe you don't tell anyone

about this.

>> No, it's not a big deal. I do that too

with my shampoo bottle.

>> Really? Yeah.

>> What award are you practicing for?

>> Grammy.

>> Best new artist.

[laughter] Oh, hey, listen. The Soapies

people called today and also get to

present an award.

>> Oh, that's great. So, you'll definitely

get on stage even if you don't win.

[laughter]

>> You You don't think I'm going to win?

>> Oh, of course I do.

>> But you should probably start practicing

your your gracious loser face, you know,

when like when the cameras are on you

and you want to look disappointed, but

also that your colleague deserve to win,

you know? So, IT'S SORT OF LIKE

>> [applause]

>> HEY,

>> YOU KNOW

>> YOU practice losing at the Grammys, too?

>> Oh, no. At the Grammys, I always win.

>> Hey, guys.

>> Hey, sweetie.

>> Ready to go?

>> Yeah, sure. Oh, I left my purse up at

Monica's. I'll be right back.

>> Wait a minute.

>> What?

That one kept going.

Wow. You and Phoebe, huh? How long you

been going out?

>> Over a month.

>> Wow. Maybe uh maybe you and I ought to

get to know each other a little better.

>> Sure, I'd like that.

>> Yeah. So, uh

what's your name? [laughter]

>> It's Jake.

>> Joey.

>> Hey, Jake. Uh do you like the Knicks?

>> Yeah, big fan.

>> Me, too. There's a game on Tuesday. You

want to go? Yeah, that'd be great. Let

me make sure I'm not doing anything

Tuesday.

[laughter]

>> Hey,

>> listen. You know how uh when you're

wearing pants and you lean forward, I

check out your underwear?

>> Yeah. [laughter]

>> Well, when Jake did it, I saw that he

was wearing women's underwear.

>> I know. They were mine.

Oh, [laughter]

>> no. No, wait. That's weird.

>> No, it's not. We were just goofing

around and I dared him to try them on.

>> That's weird.

>> I'm wearing his briefs right now.

>> That's kind of hot.

>> I think so, too.

>> And that little flap. Great for holding

my lipstick.

[laughter]

>> Yeah, I wouldn't know about that.

And you know, Jake says that women's

underwear is actually more comfortable.

And he loves the way the silk feels

against his skin.

>> Yeah. Well, next thing you know, he'd be

telling you that your high heels are

good for his posture.

>> There is nothing wrong with Jake. Okay.

He is all man. I'm thinking even more

than you.

>> Oh, yeah. He look like a real lumberjack

in those pink laces.

I'm just saying that only a man

completely secure with his masculinity

could walk around in women's underwear.

I don't think you could ever do that.

>> Hey, I am secure with my masculinity.

>> Okay, whatever.

>> You've seen my huge stack of porn,

right?

[music]

[laughter]

>> [laughter]

>> Yeah.

[laughter]

[laughter]

>> Hey, Feebs.

>> Hey

Check it out.

>> Huh?

[cheering]

>> How much of a man am I?

>> Wow. Nice. Manly and also kind of a

>> You know, I'm beginning to see what Jake

was talking about.

>> The silk feels really good.

>> Yeah. And and things aren't as smashed

down as I thought they were going to be.

It's great, Joe.

>> Yeah. And you have so many more choices

than you do with men's underwear.

Bikini, French cut, thong, and and the

fabrics. You got cotton, silk, lace, and

you know what? I've always wondered

about

>> panty hoes. You know, the way they start

at your toe and then they go all the way

up to

[laughter]

>> I should go take these off, shouldn't I?

>> I think it's important that you do.

>> Feel better?

>> Yeah. much.

Listen, uh not that I'm, you know,

insecure about my manhood or anything,

you know, but uh I think I need to hook

up with a woman like right now.

>> Yeah, I understand.

>> Yeah. Okay.

>> Hey. Hi.

>> Hi.

>> You know, you look familiar. Do I know

you from somewhere?

>> I don't think so.

>> Maybe it's because I'm on television.

>> [laughter]

>> I'm an actor on Days of Our Lives.

>> Wow.

>> Really?

>> Mhm.

>> 450, please.

>> Oh, let me get this.

[laughter]

>> These are for you.

>> Well, if we learn one thing today,

cheese, it's that cheerleaders and high

explosives don't mix.

>> [laughter]

>> You couldn't play that again, Mac.

>> Well, I couldn't have done it without

you, buddy. You're a genius.

>> Oh, yeah? Well, then how come I can't

get my VCR to stop blinking 12:00?

So, what' you guys think?

[laughter]

>> Hey, hold the phone.

>> Hold on, please. Show it to your mom.

Mommy.

>> Wow. So, what did you think?

>> Well,

that was um okay.

>> It wasn't the best. That was one of the

worst things ever. [laughter]

And not just on TV.

>> What are we going to tell him?

>> Well, the the lighting was okay.

>> Oh, no you don't. You got lighting last

time. Lighting is mine.

>> I have costumes.

>> Oh, great. That means I'm stuck with So,

we were watching you in there and you

were sitting right here. Whoa.

>> When a guy breaks up with his

girlfriend, what is an appropriate

amount of time to wait before you make a

move?

>> Oh, I'd say about a month. Really? I'd

say 3 to four.

>> Half hour.

[laughter]

>> Interesting. [laughter]

>> When it's your assistant, I would say

never. All right, Ra. The big question

is, does he like you? Right? Because if

he doesn't like you, this is all a moo

point.

Huh? A moo point?

>> Yeah. It's like a cow's opinion.

It just doesn't matter.

It's moo.

>> [laughter]

>> Have I been living with him for too long

or did that all just make sense?

[laughter]

>> Please don't listen to Joey. Okay. Would

you look at him? I mean, he's he's

obviously depressed. He's away from his

family. He's spending Thanksgiving with

strangers. What he needs right now is

for you to be his friend. Oh, you're

right. I'm sorry. Thank you. Okay,

that's what I'm going to do.

>> Fine. Take their advice.

No one ever listens to me when the

package is this pretty. No one cares

what's inside. [laughter]

>> Hello.

>> Hey. Wow. They all look like they're

having fun, don't they?

>> Hey, so where are my parents going to

be?

>> Oh, let's see. Well, if this is the

wedding hall, then um your parents would

be over here at home in Queens.

[laughter]

>> What? They're not invited. Oh, no.

That's terrible. They're going to be

crushed.

>> Why would they think they're invited?

You got me. I don't. [laughter]

>> Joey,

>> I'm sorry. Look, I thought parents were

coming. You know, your parents are

coming. Jayla's parents are coming.

Ross's parents are coming. [laughter]

>> Ross's parents are my parents.

>> Well, see, parents are coming.

[laughter]

>> You know, I think we should invite them.

>> Oh, please. You just want more blue

pens.

>> Well, this is just sad.

>> The audition went really good.

>> What was it for? Oh, it's this big

budget period movie about these three

Italian brothers who come to America

around the turn of the century. It's

really classy. Oh, and the director is

supposed to be the next next Martin

Scorsesei.

[laughter]

>> The next next?

>> Yeah, there's this guy from Chicago is

supposed to be the next Martin

Scorsesei, [laughter]

but then this guy's right after him.

>> Hello,

>> JOEY. IT'S ESTELLE. I JUST TALKED TO THE

CASTING PEOPLE. THEY LOVED YOU.

>> They loved me.

>> Yeah. And they want to see you again

tomorrow.

>> Oh my god.

>> There's just one thing. Do you have a

problem with full frontal nudity?

[laughter]

>> Are you kidding me? I never rent a movie

without it. [laughter]

>> Oh.

Uh, okay. Uh, can let me call you back.

>> What's the matter? They want me to be

totally naked in the movie.

>> Wow.

>> I know. My grandmother's going to see

this.

>> Grandma's going to have to get in line.

>> Hey, what are you guys doing today?

>> Making holiday candy for the neighbors.

>> I'm sorry. Who?

>> I'm going to hang this basket on the

door and then when the neighbors walk

by, they can all take a piece.

>> But we don't know the neighbors.

>> I do. There's uh let's see guy with a

mustache.

Smokes a lot lady. [laughter] Kids I've

seen a red-haired guy who does not like

to be called Rusty.

>> See, this is exactly why I'm making this

candy. We can learn their names and get

to know our neighbors.

>> Wouldn't it be easier if we just moved?

So, I just talked to one of the duel

writers today. And

>> what is duel?

>> Days of our lives.

>> Anyway, you're not going to believe it.

My character is coming out of his coma.

>> And and and not only that, I'm getting a

new brain.

>> So, great things are happening at work

and in your personal life. [laughter]

>> Wait, what do you mean you're getting a

new brain?

>> Well, they're killing off one of the

characters on the show, and when she

dies, her brain is being transplanted

into my body. [laughter]

>> What? A brain transplant? It's

ridiculous. Oh, I think it's ridiculous

that you haven't had sex in three and a

half months.

>> It's winter. There are fewer people on

the street.

[laughter]

>> Who are they killing off?

>> Uh Cecilia Monroe. She plays Jessica

Lockhart.

>> NO.

>> NO. [laughter]

>> SHE is so good at throwing drinks in

people's faces. I mean, I don't think

I've ever seen her finish a beverage.

>> And the way she slaps people all the

time. Wouldn't you love to do that just

once?

>> I'll do it.

>> Man, she's been on the show forever.

It's going to be really hard to fill her

shoes.

>> Yeah. Yeah. Help me out here. When you

when you come out of the brain

transplant,

>> you are going to be her?

>> Yes, but in Drake Raor's body.

[laughter]

>> Why is this so hard for you to get? I

thought you were a scientist. [laughter]

>> [applause]

>> I haven't met any Portuguese people. I I

haven't had the perfect kiss. And I

haven't been to sniper school.

>> Thieves, wait up. Listen. Uh,

close your eyes.

Maybe that's one thing you can cross off

your list.

>> Oh yeah.

>> Presenting the award for favorite

returning male character is Mackenzie.

>> This is it. This is this my category.

>> Oh my god. Do you have speech?

>> Yep. Got my speech.

>> Did you got your gracious loser face?

>> Yep.

>> No, Charlie. Remember, if you win, you

have to hug me. You hug me.

>> Okay. They say,

>> "Can I squeeze your ass [laughter]

>> on TV?"

>> Proven that this is not always

>> the category of favorite returning male

character. The nominees are John Wheeler

from General Hospital, [applause]

Gavin Graham from The Young and the

Restless, [applause]

Duncan Harrington from Passions,

[applause] and Joey Triani from Days of

Our Lives.

[applause] And the Sophie goes to

Gavin Graham from The Young and the

Restless.

>> Woohoo!

>> Die Hard still great.

>> Yeah.

>> Hey, what do you say we make it a double

feature?

>> What else you rent?

>> Die Hard, too.

Joey, this is Die Hard one again.

[laughter]

>> Well, we watch it a second time and it's

Die Hard 2.

>> Joey, we just saw it and

>> and it would be cool to see it again.

>> Yeah, Die Hard.

>> Dude, you didn't say Die Hard.

>> Is everything okay? [laughter]

>> Yeah, I just got I got plans.

>> Well, John Mlan had plans.

Now, you see the thing is I want to get

out of here before Joey gets all worked

up and starts calling everybody

>> What are you talking about,

[laughter]

[laughter]

>> [applause and cheering]

>> What happened?

>> I don't know. [laughter]

You fell asleep. That is all.

>> Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

>> All right. Well, uh I better go home.

>> Yeah. I think that would be best.

>> All right. I'll talk to you later.

>> Okay. But not about this.

>> No. Never.

>> Never.

>> So, uh uh

bye.

>> No touch. No touch.

>> [music]

[laughter]

>> Hey,

>> just uh brought back your videos.

>> Uh hey, uh Ross, look. Uh I think we

need to talk about before.

>> No, no, we don't.

>> Yes, we do. Now, look, that was the best

nap I ever had.

>> [laughter]

>> I I don't know what you're talking

about.

Come on, admit it. That was the best nap

you ever had. [laughter]

>> I've had better.

>> Okay. When

All right. ALL RIGHT. IT WAS THE BEST

NAP EVER. I SAID IT. OKAY. BUT IT'S

OVER, JOEY.

[laughter]

>> I want to DO IT AGAIN.

>> [cheering and applause]

[laughter]

>> WE CAN'T DO it again.

>> Why not?

>> Because it's weird.

[laughter]

>> Fine.

>> You want something to drink?

>> Sure. What do you got?

>> Warm milk and etc.

>> Boy, I'll tell you that judging stuff

took a lot out of me.

>> Yeah.

>> Yeah. think about maybe going upstairs

and taking a little nap on my couch.

[laughter]

>> Why Why would I care about that?

>> No reason. I'm just saying that uh

that's where I'll be. [laughter]

>> [laughter]

>> Great nap. It really was.

>> [cheering and applause]

[laughter]

>> Dude, what the hell are you doing?

[cheering]

[laughter]

>> Excuse me.

>> [cheering]

>> Did you uh find anyone to marry you guys

yet?

>> No, but horny for Monica Minister called

>> wanting to know if we were still

together.

>> We're never going to find anybody.

>> Well, then let me do it,

>> Joe.

>> No, no, no. Look, I've been thinking

about it. I'm an actor, right? So, I

won't get nervous talking in front of

people. I won't spit and I won't stare

at Monica's breasts.

You know, everyone knows I'm an assman.

That is true.

>> Yeah. And the most important thing is it

won't be some like stranger up there who

barely knows you. It'll be me. And I

swear I'll do a really good job. Plus,

you know, I love you guys and and it

would really mean a lot to me.

>> Might be kind of cool.

>> So, I can do it?

>> Yeah, you can do it.

>> All right. You don't get [laughter]

really.

>> Okay. Okay. I got to get started on my

speech. Oh, wait a minute.

Internet ministers can still have sex,

right?

>> I was sailing.

>> I don't want to talk about us.

[laughter] You know,

>> you could have at least saved me A WHOLE

COOKIE.

>> NO, NO, NO. [laughter]

>> Women are mean.

>> Cannot believe I'm going to meet

Jessica. Ashley,

>> wait. Please be cool, okay? I work with

this woman.

>> Okay, I'm totally cool. Okay,

>> come in.

>> Hey, Jessica.

>> Hey, Jess.

>> This is my friend Rachel.

>> Hi. What's up?

[laughter]

>> Uh, listen. Here's your trophy. I

accepted it for you.

>> Oh my god. I won. Do you have any idea

what this means?

[laughter]

>> That That That's it. You're not going to

You're not going to put on your shelf or

anything? No, I try to save that for

real awards. Now, if you'll excuse me,

>> take it back.

>> Absolutely.

>> Yeah.

>> Yeah, you do.

>> Try these on and we'll see if we'll get

a better idea of what's going to work.

>> Thanks. You are such a good friend. And

this is so weird. [laughter]

Ow.

>> Toothpick.

>> Yeah.

[laughter]

>> What are you trying on now?

>> The fruit roll up

>> and

>> delicious.

[laughter]

>> Joey,

>> wait a minute. Wait a minute. We have a

winner.

>> What? Which one?

>> The silly buddy.

>> Not so silly anymore.

>> [music]

>> And what's cool is the character is from

Naples, right?

>> Yeah.

>> My whole family's from Naples.

>> That's great. Okay. Well, I've heard

everything I need to hear.

We just need to uh

Leslie.

>> Uh Joey, this is the awkward part.

>> Oh, hey. Right. Not a problem. I totally

understand. You need to, you know, make

sure I don't have any horrible scars or

tattoos. Don't you worry,

>> I have nothing to hide.

So, there you go. That's me. 100%

natural.

[cheering]

>> You're here. All right. I figured it

out. I'm going to take two tables of

eight. I'm going to add your parents and

I'm going to turn them into three tables

of six. Okay. And I call the caterer. I

added two extra meals. We are good to

go.

>> Yeah. Yeah, they're not coming.

>> What?

>> Somehow they got the idea that you only

invited them because of me. They feel a

little unwanted.

>> Oh, that's too bad. It's true. But too

bad.

>> Look. Mom, if you could just call my

mom.

>> Oh, Joey.

>> Come on. Look, just just let her know

that you really want them to be there.

Let's not forget this is a woman who has

sent you many lasagnas over the years.

>> No, she hasn't.

>> Is it her fault if some of them didn't

make it to you? [laughter]

What am I going to say?

>> I don't know. Just uh just tell them

there was a mixup with the invitations

or No, no, no. Blame it on the post

office. They hate the post office and

the Irish, [laughter] but I don't think

you could blame it on them. So,

hello. Yeah. Hi, uh Mrs. Trivani. Hi,

this is Monica Geller. Yeah, I'm I'm

just calling to say that Chandler and I

really hope that you can make it to the

wedding. Yeah. Apparently, a bunch of

the invitations that we sent weren't

delivered. Um, I guess there was some

screw- up at the damn post office.

Tell me about it. [laughter]

Yeah. Yeah. The US post office. No, more

like US lost office. [laughter]

What are they? Irish?

>> Been a while, huh? Well, it's funny.

These halls look smaller than they used

to.

>> It's a different building.

Dope.

>> Striker Raor, huh? When do you want me

to start?

>> Why don't we start right now?

>> Okay.

Here are the audition scenes.

[laughter]

>> Audition? Thought you were going to

offer me the part. Why would you think

that? Well, I was Dr. Drake Remores,

Striker's twin brother, who looks more

like me than me, right? [laughter]

Everybody has to audition.

You know, Terry, I I don't really need

to do this. I got my own cable TV series

with the robot.

>> I'm sorry, Joey. That's That's the way

it is. Well,

I guess you think you're pretty special,

huh? Sitting up here in your fancy small

hall building, [laughter]

making stars jump through hoops for you,

huh? Well, you know what?

>> [laughter]

>> This is one star whose hoop.

This is a star that the hoop this hoop.

>> I WAS DR. DRAKE MEMORIAL.

>> But I just keep thinking what would

happen if if you two actually had hooked

up.

>> Honey, dinner's ready.

[cheering]

>> What's my little chef got for me

tonight? your favorite.

>> Fried stuff with cheese.

>> Yep. And lots of it.

>> Thanks, sweetheart.

>> You want to go?

>> Yeah. Here we go. Here we go.

How you doing?

重点词汇

词汇	含义
assistant /əˈsɪstənt/ B1	noun - 助手
audition /ɔːˈdɪʃən/ B2	noun - 试镜
champagne /ʃæmˈpeɪn/ B2	noun - 香槟
depressed /dɪˈprɛst/ B1	adjective - 沮丧的
disappointed /ˌdɪsəˈpɔɪntɪd/ A2	adjective - 失望的
familiar /fəˈmɪliər/ A2	adjective - 熟悉的
gracious /ˈɡreɪʃəs/ C1	adjective - 亲切的
hunger /ˈhʌŋɡər/ A2	noun - 饥饿
invitation /ˌɪnvɪˈteɪʃən/ A2	noun - 邀请
lesbian /ˈlɛzbiən/ B2	noun - 女同性恋者
masculinity /ˌmæskjəˈlɪnɪti/ C1	noun - 阳刚之气
nudity /ˈnjuːdɪti/ C1	noun - 裸体
posture /ˈpɒstʃər/ B2	noun - 姿势
ridiculous /rɪˈdɪkjʊləs/ B1	adjective - 荒谬的
transplant /trænsˈplɑːnt/ B2	noun - 移植

重点语法结构

• How would you feel about taking out my assistant?

  ➔ 礼貌请求结构

  ➔ "How would you feel about" + 动名词用于提出委婉的建议。

• Have you ever been so hungry on a date that when the girl goes to the bathroom, you ate some of her food?

  ➔ 现在完成时（ever）+ 结果从句

  ➔ "so + 形容词 + that" 结构描述了导致某个动作的极端程度。

• Just seems like Ross is the kind of guy who would marry a woman on the verge of being a lesbian.

  ➔ 带有 'who' 的定语从句和条件 'would'

  ➔ 此处的 "would" 用于描述过去习惯性、特征性的行为或假设的情况。

• And please, oh, please keep my underwear.

  ➔ 祈使句（肯定）

  ➔ 祈使句 "keep" 用于提出强烈的请求或指示。

• You don't think I'm going to win?

  ➔ 在否定疑问句中使用 'be going to'

  ➔ "Be going to" 表示预测或计划。否定疑问句常用于表达惊讶。

• I wouldn't know about that.

  ➔ 表示假设状态的 'would'

  ➔ "Wouldn't know" 暗示说话者处于无法拥有该经历的位置。

• I'm beginning to see what Jake was talking about.

  ➔ 表达过程的现在进行时 + 名词性从句

  ➔ "Am beginning" 强调理解正在随时间逐渐形成。

• What is an appropriate amount of time to wait before you make a move?

  ➔ 作形容词用的不定式短语

  ➔ "To wait" 修饰名词 "amount of time"，具体说明这是什么样的时间。