I need a favor um I was in the shower
00:00
and as I was cleansing myself I uh I I
00:03
well I felt something was it like a
00:07
sneeze only
00:10
better no no I mean I mean like a thing
00:12
on my body what was it well I I don't
00:15
know it's it's kind of in a place that's
00:19
not it's not visually accessible to me
00:21
and I was hoping maybe you guys could
00:24
could help me out no
00:27
come on you guys no big deal just
00:31
die
00:34
huh what is it is it a
00:36
mole no it's too wrinkly to be a mole ew
00:40
is it what a
00:44
pimple no it's fancier than a
00:49
pimple look Ross why don't you just go
00:53
see a
00:55
okay well it's definite two more weeks a
01:02
winter right I've got three of my five
01:04
three of your five what celebrities I'm
01:08
allowed to sleep with oh my God you are
01:11
giving us a lot of thought hey it's hard
01:14
okay I only have two spots left all
01:16
right who you got in Nan to
01:18
okay Elizabeth Hurley very attractive
01:20
yeah
01:24
forgiving Susan San
01:28
you know what she's too political she
01:32
probably wouldn't let you do it unless
01:34
you donated four cans of food
01:36
first and Isabella rosolini very hot
01:40
very sexy but uh you know she's too
01:44
International you know she's never going
01:47
to be around so so you got to play the
01:49
odds pick somebody who's going to be in
01:52
the country like all the
01:53
time yeah cuz that's why you won't get
01:56
Isabella rosellini GI
01:58
graphy for once I'm going to sit down
02:00
and try to watch one of these
02:03
things half
02:06
time hey who wants to uh throw the ball
02:09
around a little maybe get a little three
02:11
on three going oh that would be so much
02:12
fun oh can I play too I've never played
02:15
football like
02:17
ever great you can cover
02:18
Chandler no no I don't I don't really
02:22
want to play come on man you haven't
02:24
want to do anything since you and Janice
02:26
broke up that's not true I want want to
02:28
wear my bathrobe and eat peanut clusters
02:30
all day I wanted to start drinking in
02:31
the morning don't say that I don't have
02:34
ghouls CH you have to start getting over
02:36
her all right if you play you get some
02:39
fresh air maybe you'll take your mind
02:41
off Janice and if you don't play
02:43
everyone will be mad at you cuz the
02:46
teams won't be even come
02:47
on all right I'll play Yay let's do it
02:48
Ross what want to play
02:52
football um Monica and I aren't supposed
02:56
to play
02:59
football says who your
03:01
mom
03:04
yes well every Thanksgiving um we used
03:07
to have a touch football game called the
03:10
the Geller ball no no no you say that
03:13
proudly anyway Ross and I were always
03:17
captains and um it got kind of
03:19
competitive and one year Gill ball six I
03:22
accidentally broke Ross's nose
03:26
it was so not an accident she saw I was
03:30
about to tag her so she threw a big fat
03:33
grandma arm elbow in my face just kept
03:35
running to score the winning touchdown
03:38
by the way who ho ho ho uh you did not
03:41
win the game the touchdown didn't count
03:44
because of the spectacularly illegal oh
03:47
and by the way Savage nose
03:49
breaking I won the game oh yeah then how
03:52
come you didn't get the Galler cup
03:55
there was a Geller
03:59
cup yes it was the trophy you got if you
04:01
won the game but our dad said nobody won
04:04
that game and it was sick of our
04:06
fighting so we took the
04:08
trophy threw it in the
04:16
lake and was the curse
04:19
lifted
04:23
anyway that's when Mom said we were not
04:25
allowed to play football again you know
04:27
what I think we should play a game I
04:30
mean come on it's been 12 years can I
04:32
see you for a
04:35
second what all right we're going to
04:41
play well wait a minute though how are
04:45
we going to get there because my mom
04:47
won't let me cross the street that was
04:48
supposed to be like a private personal
04:49
thing between us okay Ross Phoebe is my
04:51
girlfriend okay we tell each other
04:54
everything you know I mean come on guys
04:56
do the same thing I mean what about that
04:58
locker room stuff that's different okay
05:01
that's like uh who dated a stripper or
05:04
who did it on the back of the Stanten
05:06
Island
05:08
Ferry both of those Joey
05:09
yeah but you don't you don't talk about
05:12
like you know your girlfriend and the
05:14
intimate stuff you you do with her not
05:17
even with your best friend no that is so
05:20
sad you're missing out on so much Ross I
05:24
mean the bonding and the share in you
05:27
know and and knowing that someone else
05:30
is going through the same thing you are
05:32
H so what you tell each other
05:35
everything pretty
05:39
much did you talk about the night of
05:43
five
05:46
[Music]
05:47
times do you tell people about the night
05:49
of five times H honey yeah that was with
05:52
Carol I know but it's still worth
05:56
mentioning I think you know when you
05:57
want to go to sleep you want some space
05:59
so uh you know how do I tell her that
06:01
without you know accidentally calling
06:03
her fat or
06:06
something oh honey I'm sorry we can't
06:07
help you there cuz we're cuddly
06:10
sleepers okay I'm late for work oh all
06:13
right are you guys going to come down uh
06:15
yeah yeah I'll I'm right behind you okay
06:17
good luck Chandler thank you Rachel bye
06:20
sweetie bye
06:22
honey okay the sleeping
06:24
thing very tricky business but there is
06:27
something you can do I thought you guys
06:30
were cuddly sleepy
06:32
no no not cuddly not me just her I'm
06:35
like you I need the
06:39
room okay come
06:40
here okay you're in bed
06:46
yeah I'm going to use the cushion
06:52
yeah okay you're in bed she is over on
06:56
your side cuddling now you wait for her
07:00
to drift off and then you hug her and
07:03
roll her over to her side of the
07:08
bed and then
07:12
you roll
07:14
away hug for
07:18
her roll for
07:23
you okay the old hug roll y okay one
07:27
question shoot you're pretending the
07:31
pillow's a girl
07:33
right got a job on a
07:39
riverbat you know what I didn't wear the
07:43
suit for a year because you hated it
07:45
well guess what you're not my girlfriend
07:47
anymore so oh I see so this suit is
07:48
making a point now that you're on your
07:51
own you're free to look as stupid as
07:53
you'd
07:55
like you like it right oh absolutely I
07:56
like it even more on you than I did on
07:59
carinal Sanders Ross Ross I'm kidding
08:01
come here what what were you going to
08:04
tell us yeah oh was it how you invented
08:05
the cotton chin okay
08:07
goodbye what about you I
08:09
mean there any fun you know fantasy type
08:13
things
08:19
no come on you got to have
08:22
one
08:25
nope Ross you know what what what if you
08:27
tell me I might do
08:30
it
08:40
okay um did you ever see um Return of
08:43
the
08:47
Jedi
08:54
yeah do you remember this with
08:57
um Jaba the
09:01
Hut well Jaba had as as his prisoner um
09:05
Princess
09:10
[Music]
09:13
Leia Princess Leia was wearing this um
09:15
gold bikini
09:20
thing it was pretty
09:23
cool the other night
09:27
Rachel and I are in bed talking about
09:30
fantasies and I happen to describe a
09:32
particular Star Wars thing princess
09:37
laying the gold bikini
09:40
yes yes well wow well that that was easy
09:43
okay you you go okay okay okay well you
09:49
know you know when you're in bed with a
09:52
woman and
09:55
uh you know you're ring around with her
09:57
and you get all these like mental images
10:00
in your brain you know like El mcferson
10:02
or that girl at the Xerox place with the
10:04
belly button right oh I know and then
10:06
all of a sudden your mom pops into your
10:10
head and you're like Mom get out of
10:13
here you know but of course like after
10:16
that you can't possibly think of
10:18
anything else and you can't you know
10:20
stop what you're doing so it's kind of
10:21
like
10:24
you're you know you know you I don't
10:25
know
10:31
Mom you're tell you're telling me about
10:33
about your mom what is the matter with
10:36
you you share I said share not scare go
10:38
sit over
10:42
[Music]
10:44
[Music]
10:51
there okay here we go I am job's
10:55
prisoner
10:58
and you have a really weird look on your
11:00
face what what is it did I get it wrong
11:03
did I get the hair wrong wa did you just
11:06
picture it differently what what no no
11:08
no it's um it's not you it's um
11:11
it's well what is it come on sweetie you
11:18
kind of like freaking me out
11:21
here the hate Chandler the bastard
11:24
ruined my life
11:27
Dr Bobby happens to be an excellent
11:30
doctor oh wait a minute his name is Dr
11:32
Bobby well that's his last name and his
11:36
first name he's Bobby
11:39
Bobby it's Robert
11:42
Bobby and um excuse me he helps me
11:46
please ask her how what do you need help
11:50
for with my alignment I got one leg
11:52
shorter than the other oh my God argue
11:54
with that what it's true my right leg is
11:57
2 in shorter come on you're just
11:59
tilting her legs are fine I know that so
12:02
what do you let her go to a chiropractor
12:06
for I'm sorry let her what can I do she
12:07
doesn't listen to me about uh about
12:09
renters insurance either wait a minute
12:11
you don't have renters
12:12
insurance
12:16
no but what if somebody steals something
12:18
how you going to run after him with one
12:21
leg short than the other
12:22
hey would you uh would you like some
12:30
juice I love some juice
12:31
okay wow this is going so well did you
12:34
see us did you see yeah honey I'm
12:38
standing right
12:39
there why don't you just tell him about
12:40
the mall I haven't gotten checked yet
12:42
excellent you want to play rough we can
12:45
play
12:48
rough get ready
12:49
[Applause]
12:55
[Music]
12:58
y'all ready for this
13:00
[Music]
13:04
[Music]
13:26
her get her get
13:33
[Music]
13:34
her I love this game but I told you on
13:37
the phone I don't have time to stop okay
13:41
you don't have to stop I'm invisible I'm
13:44
not here yeah but I
13:46
don't who approved that order well there
13:48
is no Mark Robinson in this office get
13:52
me Mark on the phone oh I love Mark do
13:55
you know Mark
13:58
yeah well let me just check that with
13:59
what I've got here all right see 038 is
14:01
not the number for this store 038 is
14:04
Atlanta
14:11
pepper none for
14:14
me I'm sorry as I was saying the store
14:17
number is wrong and I'm sorry but that
14:21
is oh my
14:23
god
14:25
oh okay
14:27
oh yeah oh yeah excuse me I'm sorry I'm
14:31
going to have to call you back I've got
14:33
shm in my
14:34
office what are you doing I'm sorry but
14:38
um hey oh somebody's off the phone how
14:41
about a glass of wine by the fire I can
14:44
get it going again if do you realize
14:46
this is the first time in my life I'm
14:48
doing something I actually care about
14:50
this is the first time in my life I'm
14:51
doing something that I'm actually good
14:53
at I mean if you don't get that no hey I
14:54
get that okay I get that big time and
14:56
I'm happy for you but I'm tired of
14:58
having a relationship with your
15:00
answering machine okay I don't know what
15:01
to do anymore well neither do
15:02
I is this about
15:06
Mark oh my God okay it's not oh my God I
15:09
cannot keep having the same fight over
15:14
and over again Ross no you you're you're
15:16
making this too hard oh I'm I'm making
15:18
this too hard okay what do you want me
15:20
to do I don't know I don't know look
15:22
maybe we should just take a break okay
15:25
okay fine you're right let's uh let's
15:27
take a break let's cool off okay let's
15:29
get some frozen yogurt or
15:31
something
15:35
no a break from
15:39
us I made a mistake okay a mistake what
15:48
were you trying to put it in her
15:52
purse where where did he put it
15:55
[Applause]
16:01
you had sex with another woman oh my god
16:03
oh I knew something had to be wrong
16:06
because my fingernails did not grow at
16:08
all
16:10
yesterday yeah well I guess they had a
16:12
fight and he got drunk you guys knew
16:15
about this you didn't tell us he has sex
16:17
and we get hit in our
16:20
heads you know what I want you to leave
16:21
get out of here just get out now no I no
16:23
I want to stay I want to talk about this
16:25
okay all right
16:27
how was she
16:29
uhoh what was she good don't answer
16:35
that come on she said you wanted to talk
16:40
about it let's talk about it how was
16:43
she she was awful she was not good not
16:46
good nothing compared to
16:49
you she she was different oh
16:51
uhoh good different
16:56
nobody likes
17:00
change should we do something yeah never
17:06
cheat on
17:09
Rachel I'm sorry okay I'm sorry I I was
17:11
disgusted with myself and this morning I
17:15
was so I was I was so upset and then I
17:17
got your message and I was so happy and
17:19
all I wanted was to get her out of my
17:21
apartment as fast as possible whoa whoa
17:23
whoa wait a minute
17:26
what time did your little friend
17:29
leave oh my God she was there she was
17:34
still there she was in there when I was
17:38
in
17:40
there oh
17:42
just listen oh hey hey the important
17:45
thing is she meant she meant nothing to
17:47
me and yet she was worth jeopardizing
17:49
our
17:51
relationship look I didn't think there
17:53
was a relationship to jeopardize I
17:55
thought we were broken up we were on a
17:57
break that for all I knew could last
17:59
forever that to me is a breakup you
18:01
think you're going to get out of this on
18:03
a technicality I'm not trying to get out
18:05
of anything okay I thought our
18:07
relationship was dead well you sure had
18:08
a hell of a time at a
18:11
wake you know what I don't think we
18:14
should listen to this anymore what what
18:16
are you doing you can't go out there why
18:18
not I'm
18:20
hungry because they'll know we've been
18:23
listening God i' have to hear about it
18:25
from guner come on like I wanted him to
18:28
tell you I ran all over the place trying
18:30
to make sure that didn't
18:32
happen oh that is so
18:35
sweet I think I'm falling in love with
18:39
you all over
18:41
again you know what I think we can go
18:44
out there I mean they have more
18:46
important things to worry about yeah
18:47
we'll be fine look Rachel I wanted to
18:49
tell you I thought I should I I did and
18:52
then Chandler and Jo convinced me not to
18:54
wax the door shut we're never leaving up
19:01
here's my boy here's my boy and here's
19:03
his
19:09
[Music]
19:10
Barbie what's uh what's my boy doing
19:14
with the
19:17
Barbie he picked it out of the toy store
19:19
himself he loves it he carries it
19:21
everywhere it's like a security blanket
19:23
but with ski boots and a kiky beret
19:25
yeah it's it's it's cute why why why
19:29
does he have it again so it's got a doll
19:32
so
19:35
what unless you're afraid he's going to
19:37
grow up to be in Show Business this
19:40
wouldn't have anything to do with the
19:44
fact he's been raised by two women would
19:45
it you know what it's fine if you're
19:49
okay with the Barbie thing so am I give
19:52
Daddy the Barbie give give me the Barbie
19:55
okay how about don't you want to play
19:57
with a monster
19:59
truck no okay o o how about a dino
20:02
Soldier a tournament on my
20:10
new dart board huh huh what do you think
20:13
huh two days of darts it'll be
20:17
great that'll be great for next weekend
20:20
no no no this weekend guys it'll be
20:23
great for next
20:25
weekend I mean it'll be great
20:26
what's going on we were um sort of
20:33
invited to go skiing you know Rachel's
20:36
sister's
20:38
cabin yeah that's okay me if you guys
20:43
all have to go away for the first
20:45
weekend I'm alone by myself you know
20:46
then totally totally
20:48
understand you know what I can stay I'm
20:51
going to stay cuz the last time I went
20:53
skiing I was too afraid to jump off the
20:55
chairlift I just went round and round
20:57
thieves we kind of need you to drive
21:01
everybody up there in your grandmother's
21:02
Cal but you know what I'll stay no I'll
21:03
stay he's my brother what a Pity stay
21:07
no F going to have fun we can make
21:11
fudge pity
21:18
food you know what that's okay all right
21:20
I don't need any of you to stay okay
21:23
nobody stays well then I might as well
21:24
offer to stay
21:27
on behalf of the brown birds of America
21:29
I salute
21:31
you just a minute CH you have no
21:34
backhand excuse me little one I have a
21:37
very solid backhand shielding your face
21:40
and shrieking like a girl is not a
21:42
backhand I was
21:47
shrieking like a
21:49
marine all right here watch me execute
21:52
the three PS of championship play
21:55
Power
21:59
Precision and
22:00
panach you broke a little girl's
22:06
leg no I feel horrible okay it says here
22:09
that a muppet got whacked on Sesame
22:13
Street last
22:14
night where exactly were you around
22:16
Kish we ran out of gas and we don't know
22:19
where we are so we can't get a tow truck
22:22
oh now you want a favor yes please well
22:24
uh I'm sorry your car broke down fees
22:28
but I'm a little too busy with some of
22:31
my real friends right now but please
22:32
call to let me know you got home safely
22:35
okay B hang on a
22:37
second here take my car go pick up your
22:39
friends no I'm not going to pick them up
22:41
we both know you're going to do it cuz
22:43
you're not a jerk okay so you can either
22:45
silk here for half an hour and then go
22:47
pick them up or you can save us both
22:49
time and silk in the car oh Rachel
22:50
doesn't want I am sorry that Rachel
22:52
dumped you cuz she fell in love with
22:54
that Mark guy and you were the innocent
22:55
victim in all of this but don't punish
22:57
your friends for what Rachel did to
22:59
you yeah you're right tepi hang on a
23:02
second R want to tell you something what
23:06
you slept with someone
23:09
else we were on a break okay we were we
23:11
were yeah where are you I'll find you
23:16
you slept with another woman oh you're
23:21
you're one to
23:24
talk the cat's ready all right let's go
23:26
you're welcome oh I'm sorry were you
23:30
speaking to me or sleeping with someone
23:32
else we were on a break you know Ross
23:35
why don't you just put that on your
23:38
answering machine hey hey it's valid
23:40
okay and I'm not the only one who thinks
23:42
so Monica agrees with me
23:43
what I don't
23:47
know that's what you said last night
23:50
what I said was was that I
23:53
understood Joey is the one who agreed
23:55
with you
23:57
okay really
23:59
Joey
24:02
what you know what but there there is no
24:04
right or wrong here no I think it's very
24:06
obvious who's wrong here obviously not
24:09
to
24:11
Joey
24:15
what joy and do the same way that I
24:17
do guess who I am
24:21
[Applause]
24:32
look what you're doing a
24:35
Chandler GI Joe GI Joe hey I don't know
24:38
what to tell you guys that's the doll he
24:42
chose what'd you do dip it in
24:45
Sugar look GI Joe's in Barbie's out and
24:47
if you guys can't de with it that's just
24:51
you're too
24:53
bad what are you being such a weenie for
24:55
he's a Barbie big deal you used to dress
24:58
up like a
25:01
woman
25:08
what well you used to dress up in Mom's
25:09
clothes all the time what are you
25:12
talking about the big hat the pearls the
25:13
little pink handbag okay you are totally
25:17
making this up how can you not remember
25:20
you made us call you be
25:24
[Music]
25:27
oh
25:32
god I've literally never been this
25:33
happy wasn't there a little song oh
25:37
please God let there be a song there was
25:40
there was no song there was no song I am
25:43
okay I drink okay that's that's enough
25:47
you won't
25:51
you won't
25:53
you won't you dance around with me don't
25:56
rush into anything yeah come on think
26:00
about it you're 18 okay she's
26:02
44 when you're 36 she's going to be
26:05
[Music]
26:08
88 but you don't think I know
26:11
that the point
26:16
is there's a lot of women out there you
26:18
haven't even had sex with yet yeah he's
26:20
he's right he's right this is your time
26:22
you know yeah you're young you're you're
26:25
weird dig
26:27
that okay but isn't sex better when it's
26:29
with one person that you really really
26:32
care about yeah in a poem
26:33
maybe no the man's right that's what I
26:37
had with Rachel you don't have it
26:40
anymore no I
26:42
uh I slept with someone else okay so
26:44
wait all right so how did that make
26:48
things
26:49
better it
26:51
didn't okay so what you used to have
26:54
with Rachel is what I got without Alice
26:56
now what what what is that like it's so
26:59
cool man it's so it's just cuz being
27:01
with her is so much better than like not
27:03
being with
27:06
it why can't I find that don't ask me I
27:07
had and I blew it well I want it you can
27:10
have it I don't know maybe I can I mean
27:13
maybe there's something wrong with me no
27:15
it's out there man I've seen it I got
27:17
it then you hold on to it all right man
27:21
all right congratulations lucky B you're
27:25
Frank's best
27:28
man I couldn't help it their love is so
27:31
pure well what about you huh I'm the
27:35
ring
27:39
bearer would you just stay and help me
27:40
get
27:42
dressed sure
27:45
okay okay great um okay just turn around
27:47
what I don't want you to see me naked
27:52
Rachel I've seen you naked a million
27:55
times I eat hot fudge off your naked I I
27:57
suck that mini marshmallow out of your
28:00
belly
28:02
button yeah but that was different you
28:03
know I mean we were we were going out
28:05
then I it's it's weird ra you know I can
28:07
see you naked anytime I
28:10
want
28:12
what all I have to do is close my eyes
28:14
see
28:17
woohoo stop that
28:22
I'm on aren you thinking of me like that
28:25
anymore uh sorry nothing you can do
28:28
about it it's one of my uh rights as the
28:30
ex-boyfriend huh oh oh
28:33
yeah cut it out cut it out okay okay I'm
28:36
sorry it will never happen uhoh wait a
28:40
minute wait wait now there are a hundred
28:43
of you and I'm the
28:45
king you got to stop okay you can't just
28:47
stare through the peephole for 3
28:50
hours you're going to get peie
28:54
I knew it I knew it I always knew she
28:58
liked him you know she'd say no but here
29:00
we are right we just broke up first
29:03
thing she does you didn't just break up
29:05
yeah You' spend like 3 weeks you slept
29:08
with somebody 3 hours after you thought
29:11
you broke up I mean bullets have left
29:13
guns
29:15
slower here they come here they oh if
29:17
she kisses him good night I'm going to
29:20
kill myself I swear I can't I can't
29:22
watch come on date over date over oh oh
29:25
here we go she's going in okay she's
29:29
going in wa he's going
29:32
in he's going in the door's closed I I
29:35
can't see anything but the door closed
29:40
and the inventor of the door rests
29:42
happily in his
29:44
grave okay I have to do something I mean
29:45
I have to I have to stop it stop what I
29:47
don't know but the I I have a feeling
29:50
that my being there will do it I'll go
29:52
over and I will borrow something juice I
29:54
need no
29:57
you it must be stopped I am your friend
30:00
and I am not going to let you do this
30:03
you are surprisingly
30:05
strong I need juice people need juice
30:07
look man people need juice list to me
30:11
they
30:14
[Laughter]
30:15
[Applause]
30:15
need she's moving on okay if it's not
30:18
this guy it's going to be somebody else
30:21
and unless you're thinking about
30:23
subletting my peoplee you are going to
30:24
have to get to the fact that the
30:27
relationship is over okay man it's
30:28
over yeah
30:35
okay okay it's just I miss her so
30:37
much I
30:42
know it's from the woman at the
30:45
bar sorry she thought you were somebody
30:52
else
30:54
what time is it 1 1
30:59
7:15 watch doesn't
31:02
work Tommy's supposed to be here soon
31:05
we're going to
31:07
lunch look look I wasn't going to say
31:11
anything to you but all right I don't
31:14
think you should be seeing Tommy
31:17
anymore you don't no the guy is mean I
31:19
mean really mean I think you should stay
31:23
away from him hm or maybe I should stay
31:25
away from all men no it's not just
31:30
because I'm
31:33
jealous I mean I'm not I'm not I'm not
31:34
jealous okay it's look the guy he
31:36
screamed he actually screamed at this
31:39
couple sitting in our seats yeah and at
31:41
the end of the play he he got up you
31:44
know and he just started like banging
31:47
his hands together
31:49
hi you uh wanted to see me
31:52
yeah uh here's a box of your
32:00
stuff what uh you know it's just like
32:06
hats and shirt and CDs just sort of
32:08
stuff that you've left here what are you
32:11
doing are you are you trying to hurt me
32:13
or
32:15
something
32:16
no
32:19
Ross it just seems that you know it's
32:21
time we you know move on I mean don't
32:24
you think
32:27
yes yeah yes I do yeah I I I really
32:30
do
32:36
hey this this was a gift Ross you got
32:38
that for free from the museum gift shop
32:42
it's still a gift I got it from the gift
32:45
shop okay all right give me the mug I'll
32:50
keep the mug no you know you know don't
32:53
do me any favors in fact where
32:55
where's the rest of my stuff huh like
32:58
like my um hey this book is
33:00
mine and and and and that t-shirt you
33:06
sleep in I'd like that back too yes I
33:08
do you know how much I love that t-shirt
33:13
you never even wear that t-shirt I'm
33:16
just trying to help you move
33:19
on oh you are a petty man you are a
33:21
petty petty petty petty
33:26
[Laughter]
33:31
small you are so just doing this out of
33:33
spite no no no I'm I'm going to wear
33:36
this all the time I love this
33:39
shirt you have not worn that t-shirt
33:41
since you were 15 it doesn't even fit
33:44
you anymore oh yeah yeah yeah
33:45
yeah okay okay
33:49
if you don't mind I'm going to take the
34:03
rest of my
34:04
stuff and
34:06
relax in my favorite
34:09
shirt you have a pleasant evening
34:12
[Music]
34:23
歌词与翻译
[中文]
我需要一个帮助，嗯，我在洗澡
，当我清洁自己时，我呃我我
好吧，我感觉到有什么东西，就像
打喷嚏一样
更好不不我的意思是我的意思是像一个东西
在我的身体上，那是什么，我不
知道它在一个
的地方，而不是我看不见的地方
我希望你们
可以帮助我，不
来吧，你们没什么大不了的，只是
死
哈，这是什么
痣，不，它太皱了，不像一颗痣，呃
，这是什么
粉刺，不，它比
粉刺看起来更漂亮，罗斯，你为什么不去
看看
好吧，肯定还有两周
冬天吧，我有五个中的三个
你五个中的三个，我
被允许和哪些名人上床哦，我的上帝，你
给了我们很多思考，嘿，这很难
好吧，我只剩下两个名额了
对，你在南的人
好吧，伊丽莎白·赫利非常有吸引力
是的
原谅苏珊·桑
你知道她太政治化了，她
可能不会让你这样做，除非
你先捐了四罐食物
，伊莎贝拉·罗索里尼非常性感
非常性感，但呃你知道她太
国际你知道她永远不会去
所以你必须玩
几率选择一个像所有
这个国家的人，是的，因为这就是为什么你不会得到
时间一样在
伊莎贝拉·罗塞里尼 GI
摄影一次，我要坐下来
并尝试观看这些
事物中的一个
时间嘿，谁想要呃扔球
一点也许会得到一点三
三上哦，那太棒了
有趣哦，我也可以玩吗我从来没有像
那样踢过足球
你可以覆盖的太棒了
钱德勒不不我不我真的
想玩来吧伙计你没有
自从你和珍妮丝分手后什么都不想做
那不是真的我想要
穿上我的浴袍，吃花生串
一整天我都想在
早上开始喝酒，不要说我没有
食尸鬼CH，你必须开始克服
她好吧，如果你参加比赛，你会得到一些
新鲜空气，也许你会失去你的思想
珍妮丝，如果你不参加比赛
每个人都会生你的气，因为
球队不会甚至来
好吧，我会玩耶，我们开始吧
罗斯想玩
足球，莫妮卡和我不应该
玩
足球说谁是你的
妈妈
是的，好吧，每年感恩节，嗯，我们用
进行了一场名为
盖勒球的触身式足球游戏，不不不，你自豪地说
不管怎样，罗斯和我一直是
队长，嗯，有点
有竞争力，一年吉尔球六号我
不小心打破了罗斯的鼻子
这不是一次意外，她看到我
正要标记她，所以她把一个大胖子
奶奶胳膊肘扔到我脸上，只是继续
跑着得分获胜达阵
顺便说一句，谁霍霍霍呃你没有
赢得比赛，触地得分不算
，因为极其违法哦
，顺便说一句，野蛮的鼻子
打破了我赢得了比赛哦，是的，那怎么
你没有得到加勒杯
有一个盖勒
杯，是的，如果你
赢得了比赛，那就是你得到的奖杯，但我们爸爸说没有人赢得
那场比赛我们厌倦了
的争吵，所以我们拿了
奖杯，把它扔进了
湖里，咒语
解除了
，无论如何，就在那时妈妈说我们不准
再次踢足球，你知道
我认为我们应该玩一场游戏，我
的意思是，拜托，已经12年了，我可以
见到你
秒吗？好吧，我们要
玩得很好，等一下，不过
我们要怎么去那里，因为我妈妈
不让我过马路，那条路本来
应该是私人的
我们之间的事情好吧罗斯菲比是我的
女朋友好吧我们互相告诉对方
你知道的一切我的意思是来吧伙计们
做同样的事情我的意思是
更衣室的东西不同好吧
这就像呃谁约会了一个脱衣舞娘或
谁在斯坦顿岛的背面做过
岛
把两个乔伊都摆渡
是的，但是你难道你不谈论
就像你认识你的女朋友一样，
你和她做的亲密的事情不是
，即使是你最好的朋友，不，那太
很难过，你错过了这么多罗斯，我
是指你内心的联系和分享
知道并且知道别人
正在经历和你一样的事情
H所以你们告诉对方什么
一切都很漂亮
你对
五之夜谈了很多
[音乐]
次你告诉人们关于五次
的夜晚H亲爱的，是的，那是和
卡罗尔我知道，但仍然值得
提及我想你知道当你
想睡觉时你需要一些空间
所以呃你知道我该怎么做告诉她
在你不知道的情况下不小心打电话给
她的胖子或
什么东西哦亲爱的我很抱歉我们不能
帮助你，因为我们很可爱
睡觉的人好吧我上班迟到了哦大家
对了你们要下来呃
是的我会在你身后好吗
祝你好运钱德勒谢谢你瑞秋再见
亲爱的再见
亲爱的，好吧，睡觉
的事情非常棘手，但你可以做一些
的事情，我以为你们
很可爱，很困
不，不可爱，不是我，只是她，我
和你一样，我需要
房间，好吧，来吧
在这里，好吧，你在床上
是的，我要去使用垫子
是的，好吧，你在床上，她在
你身边拥抱，现在你等待她
睡去，然后你拥抱她，
将她翻到
床的她一侧，然后
你滚
离开拥抱
她的卷
你同意旧的拥抱卷y好吧
问题拍摄你假装
枕头是一个女孩
正确地在
河蝙蝠上找到了一份工作你知道我一年没有穿
套装因为你讨厌它
好吧猜猜你不再是我的女朋友
所以哦我明白了所以这套衣服
现在表明了这一点你自己
你可以自由地看起来像
你
喜欢你喜欢的那样哦绝对我
比我在
卡琳娜·桑德斯·罗斯·罗斯身上更喜欢你，我开玩笑的
来这里你要做什么
告诉我们是的哦，这就是你发明的
棉下巴好吗
再见，你呢，我
的意思是，有什么有趣的事情，你知道幻想类型
的事情
不，来吧，你必须有
一个
不，罗斯，你知道如果你
告诉我我可能会做什么
它
好吧，你有没有看过
的
绝地归来
是的，你还记得这个吗
嗯贾巴
贾巴的小屋就像他的囚犯一样嗯
公主
[音乐]
莱娅公主穿着这件嗯
金色比基尼
那天晚上很漂亮
很酷
雷切尔和我在床上谈论
幻想，我碰巧描述了一个
星球大战中的公主
穿上金色比基尼
是的，是的，哇哦，这很容易
好吧，你走得好，好吧，好吧，你
知道你知道当你和一个
女人在床上时
呃你知道你在和她在一起
，你的大脑中会出现所有这些像心理图像
，你知道就像埃尔一样麦克弗森
或者复印店里那个有
肚脐的女孩哦，我知道，然后
突然你妈妈突然跳进你的
脑袋里，你就像妈妈从
这里出来一样，你知道，但当然就像在
之后你不可能想到
其他任何事情，你不可能知道
停止你正在做的事情，这样就有点
就像
你知道你知道你我不知道
知道
妈妈你告诉我你正在告诉我关于
你妈妈怎么了
你分享我说分享而不是吓人去
坐下来
[音乐]
[音乐]
我们开始吧我是工作的
囚犯
，你
脸上的表情非常奇怪，这是怎么回事，我弄错了
，我的头发弄错了，你只是
以不同的方式想象它，什么不不
不，嗯，不是你，是嗯
，好吧，亲爱的，你
有点像吓坏我了出来
这里讨厌钱德勒这个混蛋
毁了我的生活
鲍比博士恰好是一位出色的
医生哦等一下他的名字是博士
鲍比好吧这是他的姓氏和他的
名字他是鲍比
鲍比是罗伯特
鲍比和嗯对不起他帮助了我
请问她怎么办你需要帮助
，因为我的对齐方式我的一条腿
比另一条腿短哦，我的上帝，争论
，我的右腿是真的
短2来吧，你只是
倾斜她的腿很好，我知道，所以
你让她去看脊椎按摩师
，因为我很抱歉让她我能做什么，她
不做听我讲一下关于
房客保险的事情，要么等一下
你没有房客
保险
不，但是如果有人偷东西怎么办
你要如何用一条腿
比另一条腿短的方式去追他
嘿，你想喝点
果汁吗？我喜欢喝点果汁
好吧，哇，一切进展顺利，你吗？
看到我们了吗，亲爱的，我
站在右边
那你为什么不告诉他
我还没检查过的商场
很好，你想玩粗暴，我们可以
玩
粗暴做好准备
[掌声]
[音乐]
你们都准备好了
[音乐]
[音乐]
她让她得到
[音乐]
她我喜欢这个游戏，但我在电话上告诉你
我没有时间停下来好吗
你不必停下来我是隐形的我
不在这里是的，但是我
不知道谁在那儿批准了那个命令
这个办公室里没有马克·罗宾逊让
我在电话里马克哦我爱马克
你认识马克
是的，让我用
检查一下我在这里的东西，好吧，看到038是
不是这家商店的号码038是
亚特兰大
胡椒没有为
我很抱歉，因为我说商店
号码是错误的，我很抱歉，但是
是哦我的
上帝
哦好吧
哦是的哦是的对不起对不起我
我得给你回电话我
嘘在我的
办公室你在做什么我很抱歉但是
嗯嘿哦有人挂断了电话如何
关于在火边喝一杯酒我可以
重新开始如果你意识到
这是我一生中第一次
做我真正关心的事情
这是我一生中第一次
做我真正擅长的事情
我的意思是如果你不明白，不嘿我
明白了，我很开心
我为你感到高兴，但我厌倦了
与你建立关系
答录机好吧，我不知道
要做什么了，也不会
我是关于
马克哦我的上帝好吧这不是哦我的上帝我
不能继续为
进行同样的争吵罗斯不你你是你
让这太难了哦我是我让
这太难了好吧你想要我什么
做我不知道我不知道看
也许我们应该休息一下好吗
好吧好吧你是对的让我们呃让我们
休息一下让我们冷静一下好吧让我们
喝点冷冻酸奶或者
一些东西
不让
我们休息一下我犯了一个错误好吧一个错误你想做什么
把它放在她的
钱包里，他把它放在哪里
[鼓掌]
你和另一个女人发生了性关系哦我的上帝
哦我知道一定出了问题
因为我昨天
所有
的指甲都没有长出来是的，我猜他们
打架了，他喝醉了你们知道
这件事你没有告诉我们他发生了性关系
我们的
脑袋受到了打击你知道我想让你留下什么
离开这里，现在就出去，不，我不
我想留下来，我想谈谈这件事
好吧，好吧
她怎么样
呃，她有什么好处，不要回答
来吧，她说你想谈谈
这件事，让我们谈谈这件事，
她很糟糕，她不好，不
与
你她她不一样哦
呃好不一样
没有人喜欢
改变我们应该做点什么是的永远
欺骗
瑞秋对不起好吧对不起我我
厌恶自己，今天早上我
所以我很沮丧然后我
收到你的消息，我很高兴
我所有的我想要的是尽快让她离开我的
公寓哇哇
哇等一下
你的小朋友
什么时候离开哦我的上帝她在那儿她
还在那儿当我
在
那里时她就在那儿哦
听着哦嘿嘿重要的
事情是她的意思是她没有任何意图
我，但她值得危及
我们的
关系，我不认为
是一种危及我的关系
以为我们分手了，我们处于
分手，据我所知，这可能会持续
永远，对我来说就是分手，你
认为你会在
技术性问题上摆脱这一切没有试图摆脱
的任何事情，好吧，我以为我们的
关系已经死了，你确实
经历了一段地狱般的时光
醒来你知道吗，我认为我们
不应该再听这个了，你在做什么
你不能出去，为什么
不，我
饿了，因为他们会知道我们一直在听
上帝我必须听到
来自枪手的消息，来吧，就像我想让他
告诉你，我跑遍了整个地方，试图
以确保这不会发生
哦，那太
甜蜜了，我想我爱上了
你们
再次，你知道我认为我们可以去什么
在那里，我的意思是他们还有更多
重要的事情要担心，是的
我们会没事的，看瑞秋，我想
告诉你我想我应该这么做，
然后钱德勒和乔说服我不要
把门关上，我们永远不会离开
这是我的孩子，这是我的孩子，这是
他的
[音乐]
芭比娃娃，呃，我儿子在做什么
和
芭比娃娃一起，他从玩具店买了它
他自己很喜欢它，他带着它
到处都带着它，就像一条安全毯
但穿着滑雪靴和一顶古怪的贝雷帽
是的，这很可爱为什么为什么为什么
他又拥有它了它有一个洋娃娃
所以
除非你担心他会
长大后进入演艺界，这
不会与
他是由两个女人抚养长大的事实有任何关系
你知道吗，如果你
对芭比娃娃的事情没问题，所以我给
芭比娃娃爸爸给我芭比
好吧，你不想和怪物一起玩
吗
卡车不好吧o o恐龙怎么样
在我的
新飞镖板上参加锦标赛呵呵你觉得怎么样
呵呵两天的飞镖
太棒了，下周末会很棒
不不不这个周末伙计们下一个
很棒 我的意思是
周末会
发生了什么事，我们被
邀请去滑雪，你知道雷切尔的
姐姐的
小屋是的，如果你们
都必须在第一个
周末离开，我独自一人，你知道
然后完全完全
明白你知道我能留下什么我
要留下来，因为上次我去
滑雪时我太害怕从
缆车上跳下来，我只是一圈又一圈
小偷，我们有点需要你开车
你祖母的
卡尔那里的每个人，但你知道我会留下什么，不，我会
留下来，他是我兄弟，多遗憾的留下
没有F要玩得开心，我们可以做
软糖怜悯
食物你知道那没关系
我不需要你们任何人保持良好
没有人保持良好，那么我可能
代表美国的棕色鸟类提出留下
...
我向你致敬
你稍等一下CH你没有
反手对不起一个我有
非常坚固的反手保护你的脸
像女孩一样尖叫不是
反手我
像
海军陆战队员一样尖叫，在这里看我执行
冠军赛的三个PS
力量
精确和
华丽你打破了一个小女孩的
腿不，我感觉很可怕，好吧，这里说的
一个布偶在芝麻街
街上被打了 昨晚
晚上你到底在哪里
基什我们没油了，我们不知道
我们在哪里，所以我们找不到拖车
哦，现在你需要一个帮助，是的，好吧
呃，我很抱歉你的车抛锚了费用
但我有点太忙了
我真正的朋友现在，但请
打电话让我知道你安全到家了
好吧 B 等一下
秒，开我的车去接你的
朋友，不，我不会去接他们
我们都知道你会这么做，因为
你不是混蛋，好吧，所以你可以在这里
丝半小时，然后走
去接他们，或者你可以节省我们
的时间和车里的丝绸哦，雷切尔
不想，我很抱歉雷切尔
抛弃了你，因为她爱上了
那个马克家伙，而你是这一切的无辜
受害者，但不要惩罚
你的朋友，因为瑞秋对你所做的事
你是的，你说得对，等一下
秒，R想告诉你一些事情
你和某人睡了
否则我们就在休息，好吧我们
是的，你在哪里，我会找到你
你和另一个女人睡了哦，你是
你是一个
说猫准备好了好吗走吧
不客气哦，我很抱歉你
跟我说话或和别人睡觉
否则我们在休息，你知道罗斯
你为什么不把它放在你的
答录机上嘿嘿，这是有效的
好吧，我不是唯一一个认为
所以莫妮卡同意我的观点
我不同意的事情
知道你昨晚就是这么说的
我说的是我
明白乔伊是同意你
的人
真的好吧
乔伊
你知道什么，但这里没有
对或错，不，我认为这是非常
明显谁错了，显然不是
对
乔伊
多么高兴，像我一样做
猜猜我是谁
[掌声]
看看你在做什么
钱德勒特种部队特种部队特种部队嘿我不知道
该告诉你们什么，那是他的娃娃
选择了你把它浸入其中的东西
糖看起来特种部队在芭比娃娃里出来了
如果你们不能接受它，那只是
你太
太糟糕了，你为什么这么小气
他是个芭比娃娃，大不了你以前把
打扮得像个
女人
你以前总是穿妈妈的
衣服，你在说什么
谈论珍珠的大帽子
小粉红色手提包好吧，你完全是
编造的，你怎么能不记得
你让我们叫你
[音乐]
哦
上帝我从来没有这样
快乐不是有一首小歌哦
求上帝让有一首歌在那里
没有歌曲没有歌曲我
好吧我喝吧，就够了
你不会
你不会
你不会你和我跳舞不要
急于做任何事情是的来吧想想
你才18岁好吧她
44当你36岁她会
[音乐]
88但你认为我不知道
重点
是那里有很多女人
还没和他发生过性关系，是的，他
他是对的，他是对的，现在是你的时候了
你知道，是的，你还年轻，你是
奇怪的挖掘
没关系，但是当
和一个你真正真正的人
关心一首诗中的人时，不是更好吗 是的，在一首诗中
也许不是，这个人是对的，这就是我的意思
和瑞秋在一起了，你就没有了
不，我
呃，我和别人睡了，好吧，所以
等等，那怎么让
事情
变得更好
不好，所以你过去
和瑞秋在一起的，就是我没有爱丽丝时的
现在，那是什么感觉，太
酷男人了这只是因为
和她在一起比不
和
在一起要好得多，为什么我不能发现别问我，我
有，我搞砸了，我想要它，你可以
拥有它，我不知道也许我可以，我的意思是
也许我出了什么问题，不
它就在那里，我已经看到了，我得到了
那么你就抓住它吧，伙计
好吧，恭喜你，幸运B，你是
弗兰克最好的
男人，我忍不住了，他们的爱是如此
纯粹，那么你呢，呵呵，我是
戒指
持有者，你能留下来帮我
穿好
穿好衣服吗
好吧好吧，好吧，转身吧
我不想让你看到我裸体
瑞秋我已经看过你裸体一百万次了
次我吃你裸体的热软糖我
从你的
肚子里吸出迷你棉花糖
按钮是的，但那是不同的你
知道我的意思是我们要出去
然后我这很奇怪，你知道我可以
只要我
愿意就可以看到你裸体
我所要做的就是闭上眼睛
看看
呜呼停止那个
我在你是不是像那样想我
呃抱歉你无能为力
关于它这是我作为
前男友的呃权利之一呵呵哦
是的别说了别说了好吧好吧我
抱歉这永远不会发生呃等等
分钟等一下，现在有一百个人
，我是
国王，你必须停下来，好吧，你不能
透过猫眼盯着看 3
小时，你就会得到小便
我知道，我知道，我一直都知道她
喜欢他，你知道她会拒绝，但在这里
我们是对的，我们刚刚分手
她做的事你不只是分手
是的，你花了大约3个星期的时间
和某人睡了3周，而你以为
分手了3小时我的意思是子弹离开了
枪
这里他们来得慢他们来这里他们哦如果
她吻他晚安我要
自杀我发誓我不能我不能
看着来吧日期结束日期结束哦哦
我们走了，她要进去了，她要进去了，她要进去了，他要进去了，他要进去了，
...
，他要进去了，门关着，我
除了门关着，什么都看不到
，门的发明者幸福地安息在
他的
坟墓里，好吧，我必须做我的意思
我必须，我必须阻止它停止我
不知道的事情，但我有一种感觉
我在那里会做到这一点我会去
过去，我会借点果汁我
不需要
你必须停止我是你的朋友
我不会让你这样做
你令人惊讶
坚强我需要果汁人们需要果汁
看看男人人们需要果汁清单给我
他们
[笑声]
[掌声]
需要她继续前进，如果不是
这个家伙，那就是别人
除非你考虑
转租我的人，否则你
必须接受这样一个事实，
关系已经结束了，好吧，伙计，这是
完了
好吧好吧，只是我太想念她了
我
知道这是
酒吧的那个女人发来的，抱歉她以为你是某人
否则
现在几点了 1 1
7:15 手表坏了
汤米应该很快就到了
我们要去
吃午饭看看我不打算去对你说
任何话，但好吧，我
认为你不应该再见到汤米
了，你不知道，这个人很刻薄，我
的意思是真的，我认为你应该
远离他，嗯，或者也许我应该
远离所有男人，不，这不仅仅是
因为我
嫉妒，我是说我不是，我不是，我不是
嫉妒好吧，看起来他
尖叫的那个人他实际上对坐在我们座位上的这对
夫妇尖叫是的，在
比赛结束时他把你扶了起来
知道，他刚开始喜欢敲打
双手合在一起
嗨，你呃想见我
是的呃这是一盒你的
东西，你知道吗就像
帽子、衬衫和CD只是
你留在这儿的东西你在做什么
你在做什么你想伤害我
还是
什么
不
罗斯似乎你知道这是
时间我们你知道继续前进我的意思是不要
你认为
是是是是我是啊我我我真的
做
嘿，这是罗斯给你的礼物
从博物馆礼品店免费得到的
它仍然是我从礼物店得到的礼物
商店好吧好吧，给我杯子我会
保留杯子不，你知道你知道不要
帮我任何忙，事实上
我剩下的东西在哪里，呵呵
就像我的嗯，嘿这本书是
我的，还有你的那件 T 恤
睡觉时我也想要那件，是的，我
你知道我有多喜欢那件 T 恤
你甚至从来不穿那件 T 恤，我
只是想帮助你移动
哦，你是一个小气的人，你是一个
小气的小气小小小
[笑声]
小你只是这样做
尽管不不不我要穿
这一直是我喜欢这件
衬衫，你从15岁起就没有穿过那件T恤
它甚至不再适合
你了哦耶耶耶
耶好吧好吧
如果你不介意的话我会带走我
其余部分东西和
的
穿着我最喜欢的
衬衫放松一下，祝你度过一个愉快的夜晚
[音乐]
[英语]
Show
重点词汇
开始练习
| 词汇 | 含义 |
|---|---|
|
cleansing ˈkliːnsɪŋ B2 |
|
|
mole moʊl B1 |
|
|
wrinkly ˈrɪŋkli B1 |
|
|
celebrity səˈlebrɪti B2 |
|
|
political pəˈlɪtɪkəl B2 |
|
|
donate ˈdoʊneɪt B1 |
|
|
international ˌɪntɚˈnæʃənəl B2 |
|
|
odds ɑdz B1 |
|
|
competitive kəmˈpɛtɪtɪv B2 |
|
|
touchdown ˈtʌtʃˌdaʊn B2 |
|
|
illegal ɪˈliːgəl B1 |
|
|
trophy ˈtrɑːfi B1 |
|
|
curse kɜːrs B2 |
|
|
intimate ˈɪntɪmət C1 |
|
|
fantasy ˈfæntəsi B2 |
|
|
bikini bɪˈkiːni B1 |
|
|
relationship rɪˈleɪʃənʃɪp B1 |
|
|
breakup ˈbreɪkˌʌp B1 |
|
|
jeopardize ˈdʒɛpərˌdaɪz C1 |
|
重点语法结构
-
I need a favor um I was in the shower and as I was cleansing myself I uh I I well I felt something was it like a sneeze only better
➔ 使用话语标记（'um', 'uh', 'well'）表示犹豫和思考过程。包含嵌入子句的复杂句子结构。
➔ 这句话展示了自然、口语化的语言，带有频繁的停顿和自我修正。嵌入子句（例如“as I was cleansing myself”）增加了细节和复杂性。
-
Ross what want to play football um Monica and I aren't supposed to play football says who your mom
➔ 省略（在“what want to play”中省略“do”）。标签问题（“says who？”）。间接问题。
➔ 这句话使用了在日常对话中常见的非正式语言和语法捷径。省略和标签问题营造了一种对话的语气。
-
you're giving us a lot of thought hey it's hard okay I only have two spots left
➔ 缩写（'you're'）。使用感叹词（'hey'）。将“okay”用作语篇标记。
➔ 这句话展示了一种随意和对话式的风格。缩写和感叹词有助于营造非正式的语气。
-
you know what she's too political she probably wouldn't let you do it unless you donated four cans of food first
➔ 使用“you know what”作为语篇标记。条件句（第一条件句：“wouldn't let”+“unless”）。
➔ 这句话使用口语化的语言和条件结构来表达一个假设情况及其要求。
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