oh my God what does that thing
00:02
do uh that's an ey removal machine all
00:06
right I'm out of I'm kidding I'm kidding
00:08
uhoh hi Rachel I'm Dr Miller Monica told
00:11
me you were a little nervous but don't
00:14
worry everything's going to be just fine
00:15
so we're done then almost but first we
00:16
got to start okay this is the glaucoma
00:19
test uh-huh sit
00:21
down okay put your chin here
00:23
mhm now you're going to feel a small
00:26
puff of air in each eye what
00:29
what a small puff of air now come
00:32
on here we go all right one two three
00:36
okay sorry all right I'm going to stay
00:43
in here this time okay ready uhhuh one
00:46
two I'm sorry you know what I'm going to
00:51
hold her head okay that's okay okay okay
00:54
okay one uhhuh two I'm sorry you know
00:58
what you're young you probably don't
01:04
have
01:05
glaucoma okay so it was very very nice
01:09
to meet you sir and hey what are you are
01:12
you crazy okay you have a small minor
01:15
infection in that left eye I want you to
01:18
take these drops three times a day for a
01:20
week and you'll be as good as newon yeah
01:22
no I I don't I don't put things in my
01:24
eye okay then I guess we'll see you back
01:26
here in three months great I'll fit you
01:28
for a glass eye okay just give me the
01:30
damn
01:32
drops Dr
01:34
Miller p e CF
01:37
D very good
01:40
Monica you know where they are I sure
01:44
do and you don't get
01:50
[Music]
01:54
one okay
01:55
not even close okay well then you know
02:01
what help me I need help I can't do this
02:03
all right come on let's do it come on
02:05
all right sit down all right all right
02:07
put your head back yes all right okay
02:09
now open your eyes okay they
02:12
are how many fingers am I holding up
02:16
four oh my God I was thinking four
02:19
really yes all right you know what why
02:21
don't we start with a practice one okay
02:24
okay no drops great okay okay all right
02:26
on three one two
02:29
three my pillows all wet well well you
02:34
said it was practice then why did you
02:37
move because I knew you were
02:39
lying all right come here what are you
02:42
doing Monica stop it oh my God stop it I
02:44
am going I'm turn it over I am I
02:48
going get these drops in your eyes oh my
02:55
God you really are freakishly
02:58
strong oh my
03:02
[Music]
03:04
God
03:06
Dam well you know if Joey and Chandler
03:08
walked in right now we could make a
03:11
fortune can you for the TV Guide yeah no
03:14
what oh my God open okay
03:21
woo we'll see you in about 3 or four
03:30
hours oh I'm sorry I think I think that
03:37
may have missed the table oh do you uh
03:41
yeah do you uh yeah do you uh
03:44
yeah you really find this attractive on
03:48
him oh yeah are you telling me you're
03:50
not even a little turned on by Monica
03:53
right now
03:55
I think this is the first time in our
04:03
marriage that I felt like the more
04:04
attractive
04:05
one all come on Mike you can beat her
04:06
knock that dog off her
04:09
head damn it I sleep with
04:15
him game point don't get too cocky
04:20
remember I won the last one oh by the
04:23
way how did that feel losing to a girl
04:25
you know you should really look in the
04:28
mirror before before you call yourself
04:29
that no no no and that's how it's
04:34
done hoky dokie you've each won a game
04:38
and I've lost what's felt like a year of
04:41
my
04:43
life so everybody goes home winner best
04:44
out of three that's what I'm thinking
04:47
should I use my invisibility to fight
04:49
crime or for
04:51
evil serve them allall chump you CH okay
04:54
better come back Mike better come
04:58
back okay you know what I'll have
05:01
toast
05:06
[Music]
05:11
my you guys you guys we were we were
05:16
just in the storage area and we saw this
05:19
really creepy man it was like this crazy
05:21
eyed hairy beast man he was like a like
05:24
a Bigfoot or a Yeti or something
05:27
and he he came at us with an axe so
05:30
Rachel had to use a bug bomb on him yeah
05:32
I I I pulled the tab and I just fogged
05:34
his Yeti
05:36
ass uh like dark hair bushy beard yeah
05:38
yeah you fog
05:43
Danny please we did not fog Danny who's
05:45
Danny Danny just moved in downstairs
05:50
yeah he just got back from like this
05:53
four Monon Trek in the Andes nice
05:54
fella oh he's nice he's nice you know
05:57
you always stick up for the people we
06:00
fog mom would you relax that was 10
06:02
blocks from here and the woman was
06:06
walking alone at night I would never do
06:08
that Mom come on stop
06:11
worrying this is a safe Street this is a
06:13
safe building there's
06:16
nothing I got to go I got to go I got to
06:20
go okay
06:27
it's fine you just read the
06:29
paper I'm going to get a
06:31
pot it's not for
06:33
[Music]
06:35
you okay that's
06:41
fine read the Family
06:44
Circus enjoy the gentle
06:48
comedy oh my God oh my God oh my God oh
06:54
my God oh my God oh my God oh my God
06:58
[Laughter]
07:03
it's open you
07:08
guys hi hey hey can I help you yeah I'm
07:10
looking for Phoebe does she still live
07:14
here uh no she doesn't but I can I can
07:15
get a message to her great uh just tell
07:17
her her husband stopped by her
07:20
what hey how did you do that your hands
07:24
off her for one second oh I think it's
07:28
nice I think it's
07:31
necessary I I I want to thank you all
07:41
for coming my family and my friends
07:43
woo I'd really like to say that I'm
07:51
um you know what I'd really like to say
07:56
I'm
08:00
drunk that's right mom and dad your
08:04
little heart Mara is
08:07
[Laughter]
08:10
hammer and guess what I've been drunk
08:11
before and I've smoked a
08:16
cigarette you know what you know
08:19
what it's all okay it's okay because I
08:21
turned 30
08:26
today and I can do anything I
08:27
want because I am a
08:30
[Music]
08:35
grownup my God these pants I'm burning
08:40
up come on she wants to snuggle now what
08:46
is she trying to kill me it's like a
08:50
volcano in
08:52
here are you hot
08:54
no okay must just be me
08:58
then that was just the pants on the
09:14
couch um hey do you do you mind if I use
09:18
your bathroom oh go ahead thanks
09:21
oh
09:47
a hey my favorite part's coming up
10:04
okay oh my God
10:25
[Music]
10:28
hello Joey it's Ross I need some
10:31
help uh Chandler's not here well you can
10:34
help
10:37
me okay listen I'm in Elizabeth's
10:39
bathroom
10:43
nice no I I got really hot in my leather
10:45
pants so I took them off but they must
10:48
have shrunk from the the sweat or
10:50
something or or my legs expanded from
10:53
the heat but I I can't get them back on
10:55
Joey I
10:59
can't that is quite a
11:02
situation uh do you see any like powder
11:06
what powder yeah yeah I have powder good
11:09
good okay sprinkle some of that on your
11:13
legs it'll absorb some of the moisture
11:15
and then you can get your pants back on
11:17
yeah hold yeah hold on
11:18
they're not coming on
11:43
man um you see any uh oh Vaseline oh I I
11:45
see lotion I have lotion will that work
11:52
yeah sure throw some of that on there
11:55
hold on
11:57
Ross you okay there're still they're
12:13
still not coming on man and the lotion
12:16
and the powder have made a
12:18
paste
12:21
really uh what color is
12:24
it difference does
12:27
make well I'm just if the paste matches
12:29
the pants you can make yourself a pair
12:32
of paste pants and you won't know the
12:33
difference Joey do you have a minute
12:36
dude what am I uh Rachel's here so good
12:39
luck man let me know how it works
12:42
out oh Joey I have such a problem uh
12:45
well your timing couldn't be better I am
12:49
putting on Fires all over the place
12:51
today Ross um you've been in there for a
12:56
long time I'm starting to get kind of
13:00
freaked out all right I'm coming
13:03
out hey can you turn the lights
13:07
off no let's just leave the lights
13:12
on oh my God
13:26
I had a
13:29
problem in
13:31
a you go
13:39
kids and then the peacock bit
13:41
me please kiss me at
13:44
midnight you seen Sandy o uh I don't
13:51
know how to tell you this but uh she's
13:54
in Monica's bedroom getting it on with
13:56
Max that
13:58
a oh look at that I did know how to tell
13:59
you everybody the ball is ding
14:03
what the p is
14:08
dropping in it'll be and the moment of
14:12
joy is upon us looks like that no date
14:17
pack thing worked out everybody looks so
14:20
happy I hate that not everybody's happy
14:23
hey Bobby
14:27
happy New
14:32
Year you know I uh just thought I'd
14:34
throw this out here I'm no math whz but
14:37
I do believe there are three girls and
14:39
three guys right
14:41
here oh I don't feel like kissing anyone
14:44
tonight I can't kiss anyone so I'm
14:47
kissing everyone no no no you can't kiss
14:51
Ross that's your brother oh yeah that's
14:54
perfect perfect so now everybody's going
14:56
to kiss but me all right somebody kiss
14:58
me somebody kiss me it's midnight
15:00
somebody kiss somebody kiss me it's
15:02
midnight
15:04
[Applause]
15:05
it's weird what your nails oh I know I
15:07
never wear fake ones I just did it so my
15:12
mom wouldn't give me grief about biting
15:13
them oh no I meant it's weird that you
15:15
only have nine
15:17
now oh my
15:21
God wait a minute I had him when I put
15:23
oh my God it's in the
15:28
kiche oh my God okay don't panic I'm
15:30
going to go to the store I'm going to
15:33
get you another set of nails no one's
15:34
going to know and you're going to look
15:36
great oh oh it's cuz they're going to
15:39
eat that's the
15:42
problem honey don't bite your
15:44
nails okay uh please don't freak out um
15:49
but uh there's a blue fingernail in in
15:53
one of the kich cups and there's no way
15:55
to know which one
15:58
one and whoever finds it wins the
16:01
[Music]
16:05
[Applause]
16:13
prize look at you all sweet and innocent
16:17
sleeping like an angel with them his
16:20
chubby little hands wrapped around
16:23
you it's okay Emma you stay
16:27
[Music]
16:30
asleep step away from the
16:32
CRI it's okay it's okay R it's me put
16:35
down the
16:38
scrunchie what are you doing well I
16:39
heard Emma stirring so so I came in to
16:42
make sure she could reach hugsy oh oh
16:44
thanks all right well now that I'm up
16:48
I'm going to go to the bathroom okay
16:50
there you go
16:52
sweetie this isn't over
16:55
okay now just remember everything I
17:00
taught you and you'll be fine okay here
17:01
we go ready set wait this seat is really
17:04
uncomfortable but maybe before we start
17:10
we should just get another one perhaps
17:12
like an airplane seat or a bean bag
17:14
chair baby you can't get out of this
17:17
okay you have to learn how to ride a
17:20
bike why why do I have to
17:22
learn well in in case of an emergency
17:25
what kind of emergency well what if a
17:30
man comes along and puts a gun to your
17:32
head and says you ride this bike or
17:35
I'll I'll shoot
17:38
you okay I would ring the bell to
17:41
distract him and then I would knock the
17:43
gun out of his hand with a Chinese
17:45
throwing
17:46
star okay phoei just just get get on the
17:48
bike and hey I'll hold you up and and
17:52
push you
17:55
okay you won't let go
17:57
no you swear I
17:59
swear okay come
18:03
on all right here we go all right all
18:07
right feel good all right try pedaling
18:11
that's it you're doing great you're
18:14
doing great yes yes yes take control
18:15
[Applause]
18:18
yes
18:22
no you score I I just thought you were
18:25
doing so well
18:28
shock
18:29
shock it's a legitimate learning
18:35
technique come in I've been waiting for
18:39
[Music]
18:43
you hi I just want oh my God oh my
18:47
God my God oh God I'm sorry sorry I I
18:51
was um I was taking a nap since one take
18:55
naps in that
18:58
position oh God Monica tell me you
19:02
waiting for a guy please tell me you're
19:04
waiting for a guy yes yes I was a guy
19:05
from
19:09
work I'm seeing a guy from work
19:10
ha that cute waiter guy from your
19:15
restaurant the one that looks like a
19:17
non-threatening Ray
19:19
Leota uh-huh that one you know what just
19:20
give me a second I'll be out of your
19:24
hair I'm just going to grab a jacket
19:25
when I get back
19:27
I want every little
19:29
detail maybe that's him okay um okay
19:33
um it's just Jo
19:39
Ross why aren't you guys at the movie
19:42
well we were but Ross was talking so
19:44
loud on his phone they threw us out I
19:46
had to talk loud because the movie was
19:48
loud he's talking to London oh my god
19:52
did he get in touch with Emily well no
19:55
not yet is calling everyone on her side
19:58
of the family hoping that someone will
19:59
help him get in touch with her I I don't
20:01
care if I said some other girl's name
20:02
you prissy old
20:05
twit Ross way to suck up to the
20:07
[Laughter]
20:14
family I'm so glad you guys are all here
20:18
my office finally got wrinkle-free fact
20:20
paper I know my life's going pretty well
20:23
but I look around and I just see so many
20:25
people whove accomplished
20:27
so many of their goals by the time
20:29
they're 30 yeah but you shouldn't
20:30
compare yourself to
20:32
[Applause]
20:36
me there
20:38
[Applause]
20:41
you I did it one mile on a hippity hop
20:45
that's it that's everything I wanted to
20:50
do before I was 30 oh except I wanted to
20:52
patch things up with my sister oh well
20:55
but yay
20:57
and and girls this thing is a godsend if
21:00
you know what I
21:02
mean fine you can have the bath but I am
21:10
taking your boat now you're just a girl
21:13
in a
21:15
tub hey hi bubbles
21:19
manly well I just thought I would drop
21:22
by and let you know how I went with Joey
21:24
you told her
21:26
she pulled it out of me she's like a
21:29
conversational
21:31
wizard how did it go well you were wrong
21:32
he doesn't like me what yeah how would
21:35
you like it if I sent you to Lee Major's
21:38
house and I told you that he liked you
21:41
and you went down there and you found
21:42
out that he didn't like you how would
21:43
you
21:45
feel I don't think I'd care really Lee
21:48
major is
21:51
hot hello we're in the bathroom
21:54
why because it's a relaxing and
21:59
enjoyable
22:01
time what do you guys doing in
22:05
here oh my God a friend he's looking at
22:07
differently but it's wrong it's Rachel
22:12
you like Rachel he look it's no big deal
22:16
okay Phoebe and I talked about it it's
22:19
just a crush it's going to go away dude
22:20
you got to rearrange your bubbles
22:22
whoa M tough
22:26
hey hi Ross and I were looking for you
22:31
what are we all doing in
22:34
here oh
22:36
my honey cover it up with the
22:39
boat hello yes we're all in here and
22:44
we'd love for you to join
22:47
us hey what's going on oo cool boat oh
22:51
no
22:57
hey did did did you tell him no I was
23:00
waiting for you tell us what we're
23:01
having a girl
23:04
[Applause]
23:06
[Music]
23:07
oh I'll get you later who can kick who
23:11
ass in a fight you or Ross there's no
23:13
question so you think Ross
23:16
too you picked Ross Ross is really
23:21
strong okay he's the strongest out of
23:24
all three of you except for Joey
23:25
I cannot believe you didn't pick me uh
23:30
in her defense she's right I am stronger
23:32
I would destroy
23:35
you oh really you think you're stronger
23:36
why don't you prove
23:40
it oh I'll prove it I'll prove it like a
23:42
theum wait okay stop it stop it stop now
23:45
there's no one's going to fight in this
23:50
apartment hey Monica people came to see
23:51
a fight let's give them what they came
23:53
for you guys could arm wrest yeah listen
23:56
to the
23:59
nurse you're going down oh yeah you're
24:01
going further down down town seriously
24:04
guys the trash talk is
24:07
embarrassing you know what I'm thinking
24:11
oh
24:13
okay
24:18
how it's been so long since you've had
24:20
sex you're wondering if they've changed
24:23
it no although now that's what I'm
24:26
thinking all right so what were you
24:31
thinking well I was thinking that you
24:33
gave the guy Such Great Haircuts I
24:35
thought maybe you'd like to do mine oh
24:37
no why not because I'm just I'm
24:41
incredibly anal and an unbelievable
24:45
control freak no you're not I know I'm
24:47
not but you are and I was trying to
24:51
spare your feelings
24:53
you know it's funny last time Paula was
24:59
here my hair was so much shorter and
25:01
cuter all right okay but but you have to
25:03
promise that you will not be all like
25:08
controlly and bossy and all you know
25:09
Monica about
25:12
it I promise all right let's see now
25:13
some of you are going to get cut and
25:18
some of you
25:20
aren't but I promise none of you will
25:22
feel a thing
25:24
[Music]
25:29
all right that's it I Quit what I didn't
25:39
say anything yeah but this isn't the
25:41
face of a person who trusts a person
25:44
okay this is the face of a person who
25:46
you know doesn't trust a
25:48
person I'm sorry sorry phoe it's just
25:51
well just a little shorter than what we
25:55
had disc
25:57
would you relax I know what I am doing
25:58
this is how he wears
26:02
it how who wears it Demi
26:06
Moore Demi Moore is not a he well he was
26:09
a he in Arthur and
26:13
in that's Dudley Moore I said I wanted
26:16
it like demim more oh oh oh my God oh my
26:20
God oh my God oh my God I'm sorry I'm
26:26
sorry I'm sorry which one is demore
26:30
she's the actress that was in disclosure
26:32
and decent proposal ghost oh oh she's
26:35
got Gorgeous Hair
26:38
I how is
26:44
she it's too soon to
26:46
tell she's resting which is a good
26:49
sign how's the hair I'm not going to lie
26:53
to you Ross it doesn't look good
26:56
I put a clip on one side which seems to
27:00
have stopped the
27:02
curling hello hello is Ross there uh no
27:06
he's not can I take a message yes this
27:10
is Russell Ross's divorce lawyer just
27:12
tell him that since I haven't heard from
27:14
him I assume he's decided to give the
27:15
marriage a try Ross got married again
27:17
[Applause]
27:21
no all right keep going we are phasing
27:23
the accent out phasing it
27:26
out so without retesting their results
27:29
in the
27:33
laboratory the team would never have
27:34
identified the initial errors in their
27:40
carbon dating a
27:43
n were there any questions at this
27:48
point yes what's happening to your
27:51
accent
27:54
come again what's what's this
27:58
nonsense all right I'm I'm not
28:04
English I'm from Long
28:08
Island I was really nervous and the
28:11
accent just um just came
28:14
out I'm
28:16
sorry so if we could just get back to
28:20
the
28:22
lecture um were there any questions
28:24
about
28:30
paleontology all right look I was just
28:34
trying to make a good first impression
28:36
obviously I screwed up but what you guys
28:38
think of me is really important because
28:41
I'm I'm hoping to get a permanent job
28:43
here so if you just give me another
28:45
chance to make a good
28:48
impression Russ are you crazy I am still
28:50
your wife what were you just never going
28:54
to tell me what the hell is wrong with
28:56
with you oh I can just kill
28:58
you wello Rachel you can wear this
29:06
thanks
29:10
okay I'm I'm setting the phone
29:13
down but I'm still
29:16
here just don't go anywhere I'm still
29:19
here don't don't switch or anything cuz
29:21
I'm I'm right here just one sec
29:24
one sec one second wait one second just
29:28
what Monica I'm
29:34
scared that's that's a sleeve okay and
29:37
we also have a speaker phone please stay
29:41
on the line your call is important to us
29:43
hey wait you got to hang up cuz we're
29:46
going to be late thank you for your
29:48
patience you're the next caller yes yes
29:49
I'm the next caller you're going to have
29:52
me hang up
29:55
hey can you take a duck and a chick to
29:59
the
30:02
theater of course not okay I just wanted
30:03
them to hear it from somebody
30:06
else hi it's me oh my
30:10
God Janice you called
30:18
Janice yes Janice why is that so
30:22
difficult for you to comprehend you
30:25
remember Janice
30:27
right yes she was smart she was pretty
30:29
and she honestly cared about me Janice
30:33
is my last chance to have
30:35
somebody
30:38
hello oh my
30:42
God jeez look how fat she
30:47
got hey it's
30:51
[Music]
30:53
everybody Janice you're yes yes I
30:55
am is it is it yours ha You Wish
30:59
Chandler
31:03
Bing you are looking at a married lady
31:04
now oh
31:08
yeah
31:13
congratulations oh sweetie I'm sorry you
31:15
couldn't have told me about this over
31:18
the phone and what miss the expression
31:20
on your face oh no Janice likes to have
31:22
her fun
31:25
I me
31:28
forever so this is
31:32
Brooklyn all right listen up there's
31:35
usually only one dress in each size so
31:38
when they open those doors fan out now
31:40
this is what you're looking for memorize
31:44
it when you locate the
31:49
dress blow on these all right three
31:51
sharp blasts when you hear it come
31:55
running all right oh they're pushing
31:59
they're pushing don't be a
32:02
baby hey Rachel come
32:08
[Music]
32:15
on no no not it not
32:19
it don't crowd me
32:26
this is it this is the dress oh my God
32:31
it's perfect I'm sorry this one's taken
32:33
wow Megan Monica you came yeah this is
32:38
my dress
32:43
no yes it is you saw me wearing it and
32:45
now you'll see me buying it what you
32:48
freak you wouldn't even have known about
32:51
this place if it wasn't for me look you
32:54
don't want to fight me maybe I do do I'm
32:55
pretty
32:58
feisty I'm coming I'm coming
33:01
hey
33:04
okay hey go what do I
33:06
[Music]
33:08
do what are you
33:15
doing
33:18
dress did you find the dress no you got
33:20
to get me out of here phoi these bargain
33:22
Choppers are crazy we got to get Monica
33:24
no you got to hold my hand my
33:26
God excuse me excuse
33:29
me go go
33:34
[Applause]
33:37
go and you know if I get really hot um I
33:41
I like to pick up this knife and and um
33:45
I I put the the cold steel against
33:50
um my body
33:55
are you all right okay yeah I'm
34:00
[Music]
34:05
[Applause]
34:09
[Music]
34:12
fine what do we got here 20-year-old
34:17
male he's got a sever toe on his right
34:20
foot could you please not do that feet
34:24
first you know where his injury is SE
34:27
toe you just said
34:29
it says here the knife went right
34:32
through your shoe of course it did
34:34
they're made of
34:35
wicker did you bring the taup oh yes I
34:37
have it right here on
34:40
Ice don't worry son we'll just reattach
34:42
it and
34:44
then what what is it you brought a
34:45
carrot what this isn't your toe this is
34:51
a small very cold piece of
34:53
carrot you br what a carrot oh my God
34:56
there's a toe in my kitchen gentlemen
35:01
you're up first okay okay you have 30
35:04
seconds the lightning round begins stop
35:08
it now what was Monica's nickname when
35:14
she was a field hockey goalie big fat
35:17
goalie
35:19
correct Rachel claims this is her
35:22
favorite movie dangerously ason correct
35:25
her actual favorite movie is weend to
35:27
Bernie
35:29
correct in what part of her body did
35:31
Monica get a pencil stuck at age 14
35:33
who you
35:39
no her
35:43
ear all right Monica categorizes her
35:47
towels how many categories are there
35:50
everyday use fancy guest fancy guest two
35:53
seconds no
35:56
11 unbelievable 11 is
35:59
[Applause]
36:01
correct all right that's four for the
36:04
guys ladies you're up all come
36:07
on 30 seconds on the clock five correct
36:13
questions wins the game the lightning
36:18
round begins now what is Joey's favorite
36:20
food sandwiches correct Chandler was how
36:23
old when he first touched a girl's bra
36:26
14 No 19 thanks
36:28
man Joey had an imaginary childhood
36:30
friend his name was Maurice correct his
36:33
profession was Space Cowboy
36:35
correct what is Chandler Bing's
36:38
job oh gosh this has something to do
36:45
with numbers and processing it carries a
36:47
briefcase 10 seconds you need this or
36:50
you lose the game it's um has something
36:52
to do with transponding oh oh oh he a
36:54
trans F trans
36:56
that's not even a
37:00
word I can get this I can get
37:03
[Applause]
37:09
this can't find garbage bags oh well I
37:16
think I saw something in
37:19
here what is it
37:25
I don't know but maybe if we keep that
37:28
drawer shut it'll
37:30
die we're living
37:34
[Music]
37:36
here what what what is did you see the
37:41
size of the
37:44
closet I can't believe we live
37:46
here a
37:55
hey hey how was it well I had a great
38:00
time um Chanty on the other hand I will
38:03
tell the story it was going great I let
38:08
him win we were bonding he even said
38:11
that I could call him dad and what did
38:14
he ask you not to call him
38:15
daddy all right look here's the
38:19
story well we had just finished playing
38:22
racketball and we were going to take a
38:25
steam
38:26
I walk into the steam room and it's
38:28
really
38:30
steamy so I take off my glasses and
38:33
that's when it happened guys over here
38:36
have a seat
38:40
son hey
38:46
[Applause]
38:49
[Music]
38:53
[Applause]
38:56
oh my God Chandler I can't believe it I
38:59
know you gave my father a lap
39:01
dance why do they put so much steam in
39:07
there CU otherwise they have to call it
39:11
the room
39:14
[Music]
39:15
room why okay why why did that have to
39:17
happen come on it's not that big a deal
39:22
not that big a deal there there was
39:25
touching of
39:28
things I know you wanted to bond with my
39:30
dad but did you really have to bond to
39:32
that
39:34
part listen I'm sure that dad doesn't
39:38
care he probably thought this was really
39:40
funny he'll be telling the story for
39:42
years I don't want him to tell this
39:44
story for
39:46
years oh but he
39:47
will he still tells a story about how
39:50
Monica tried to escape from fat
39:52
camp wasn't escaping then how'd you get
39:56
caught in the barbed
39:59
wire I was trying to help out a squirrel
40:00
you were trying to eat
40:03
it if that is your father calling to
40:08
tell this story then the marriage is
40:10
off come on
40:13
hello I'm sorry you have the wrong
40:16
number okay I'll call you later Dad I
40:18
love you
40:20
[Music]
40:24
all right I'm off to see your dad whoa
40:28
whoa aren't you a little
40:30
overdressed yeah and and you better make
40:32
sure he tips you this
40:35
time look I figured I would try to
40:37
convince him not to tell the story
40:39
anymore and I figured the best way to do
40:41
that was face to face and by face I
40:43
don't mean his lap and by face I don't
40:46
mean my
40:49
ass so you understand I'd feel a lot
40:53
more comfortable if you didn't tell
40:56
people what happened you know I'm a
40:57
little I'm a little embarrassed about it
40:59
I understand completely there's nothing
41:02
more horrifying than embarrassing
41:04
yourself in front of your in-laws as a
41:06
matter of fact when I started dating
41:08
Judy I was unemployed and her father
41:10
asked me what I did for a living and I
41:13
told him I was a lawyer what what' you
41:14
do when they found out they never did so
41:17
if you ever see me giving them legal
41:19
advice just not
41:21
alone shall we
41:23
so I guess we wear swimsuits in
41:41
here hi again
41:43
[Applause]
41:46
[Music]
41:47
hi today we're going to start with some
41:48
songs about Barnyard
41:51
animals oh the cow in the M goes move
41:54
oh the cow in the me goes moo then the
41:57
farmer hits him on the head and grinds
42:00
him up and that's how we get
42:02
[Applause]
42:06
hamburgers
42:08
chicken hello one marriage
42:12
please yep you want to get married well
42:14
there's a service in progress have a
42:17
seat all all right
42:19
[Music]
42:27
what are you doing oh that's the wedding
42:30
marches does that freak you out no only
42:32
because it's the graduation
42:35
song okay this is it we're going to get
42:40
married are you sure you want to do
42:45
[Applause]
42:49
this hello Mrs R hello is that
42:52
right
43:01
okay you go into your room and try these
43:03
on and we'll see we'll get a better idea
43:05
of what's going to work thanks you are
43:06
such a good friend and this is so
43:07
weird ow toothpick
43:17
yeah what are you trying on now the
43:21
fruit roll up and delicious
43:24
Joey wait a minute wait a minute we have
43:29
a winner what which
43:32
one the silly putty not so silly
43:35
anymore and what's cool is the character
43:44
is from Naples right yeah my whole
43:46
family's from Naples that's great okay
43:49
well I've heard everything I need to
43:53
hear we just just need to
43:55
uh
43:58
Leslie uh Joey this is the awkward part
44:00
oh hey right not a problem I totally
44:03
understand you need to you know make
44:07
sure I don't have any horrible scars or
44:09
tattoos don't you
44:11
worry I have nothing to
44:13
hide so there you go that's me 100%
44:17
natural
44:22
[Laughter]
44:27
well glamas say hello to your new
44:31
home oh
44:38
my wow oh she's so nice and
44:40
big oh Monica where are you going to
44:46
display glattus oh so
44:50
proudly we haven't really settled on a
44:53
spot yet well hey how about right above
44:55
the TV that way it will be the first
44:57
thing that you see when you walk in the
45:00
door yeah yeah and you can get rid of
45:03
that French poster I like that poster
45:06
really doesn't have anything coming out
45:09
of
45:11
it or maybe there's some place for her
45:12
in your bedroom no there's nothing above
45:15
your bed are you still
45:17
here Ben you ready yeah all right give
45:19
me your foot okay okay on three Ben one
45:21
two three go
45:25
Come on B okay that's it Ben okay okay
45:27
what are you
45:31
see well Susan I see what appears to be
45:32
a dark
45:35
vent wait yes it is in fact a dark
45:36
vent phes it's open it's
45:44
open wait you forgot your legs
45:49
[Applause]
45:57
[Music]
45:57
where have you
45:59
been long story honey all right Carol I
46:01
need you to keep pushing I need to I I
46:03
need excuse me can I have
46:05
this all right all right there's a few
46:08
too many people in this room there's
46:11
about to be one more so anybody who's
46:12
not an ex-husband or a lesbian life
46:14
partner out you
46:17
go Goode good luck you guys good luck
46:19
luck let me ask you do you have to be
46:22
Carol's lesbian life partner this is my
46:23
real father and I just I want things to
46:26
be like just right yeah pH I completely
46:29
understand yeah whatever you
46:33
need hey you want to go home okay thanks
46:35
sorry again
46:39
[Laughter]
46:50
what was
47:00
that uh I'm guessing the thresholds
47:04
clear
47:07
now hey hey thieves oh hey how's the dog
47:09
yeah okay I talked to the vet people are
47:13
so nice up State anyway he said that the
47:15
little fell is going to be okay and I
47:18
can pick him up tomorrow oh good thank
47:20
God yeah but he did have to have like a
47:22
bunch of stitches and he said that only
47:25
once in a blue moon does a dog's ear
47:27
grow back
47:29
so hey hey what have you guys been up to
47:32
oh we went to a self-defense class today
47:34
wow yeah kicking a guy in the crotch all
47:37
morning really takes it out of
47:39
you takes it out of
47:41
you now now we can kick anybody's ass
47:44
yeah after one class I don't think so
47:48
what you want to see me self-defend
47:51
myself go over there and pretend you're
47:52
a sexual predator go on I dare you
47:54
of course you could defend yourself from
47:58
an attack you know is coming that's not
48:00
enough look I studied karate for a long
48:03
time and there's a concept you should
48:08
really be familiar with it's what the
48:11
Japanese call
48:13
unagi isn't that a kind of
48:17
sushi no it's a concept yeah it is it is
48:20
it's freshwater
48:23
heel all right maybe it means that too
48:25
oh I would kill for a salmon skin roll
48:28
right
48:29
now no fine get attacked I don't even
48:31
care come on Ross we're sorry please
48:34
tell us what it
48:37
is unagi is a state of total
48:40
awareness okay only by achieving true
48:46
unagi can you be prepared for any danger
48:49
that may befall
48:51
you you mean in case someone's trying to
48:54
steal your bamboo sleeping mat or your
48:56
kettle of
48:58
fish all I'm saying is it's one thing
49:02
being prepared for an attack against
49:05
like each other whole another story
49:07
being prepared for an attack I don't
49:09
know like a
49:11
[Laughter]
49:16
surprise all right you knew that was
49:20
coming but that doesn't mean you have
49:22
unagi
49:24
[Applause]
49:27
oh you know what if we made reservations
49:29
we could have unagi in about a half
49:31
[Music]
49:35
[Laughter]
49:42
hour what the hell was that a lesson in
49:45
the importance of
49:50
unagi you're a freak
49:54
perhaps now I'm curious at what point
50:00
during those girlish screams would you
50:03
have begun to kick my
50:05
ass all right so we weren't
50:09
prepared I'm sorry I had to take such
50:13
drastic measures to make my point but I
50:16
look I just want you guys to be
50:18
safe Danger
50:21
uhuh
50:28
[Music]
50:36
[Applause]
50:37
unagi
50:39
[Laughter]
50:42
[Applause]
50:44
danger
50:47
ah Salmon skin roll
50:48
[Music]
50:53
hat say Jack yeah Alex TRC oh of course
50:56
Chuck willery definitely Phoebe you will
51:01
not find a single game show host whose
51:03
ass I cannot
51:07
kick
51:15
no say it say we are
51:17
unagi it's not something you are it's
51:21
something you have
51:23
say it you know what I could easily get
51:26
out of this but there's a chance you
51:28
could get very very
51:30
hurt uhhuh nowhere to
51:39
run I don't like sitting up here I'm
51:45
going to go over the ritel they got here
51:49
first
51:50
[Laughter]
51:55
why is Ross doing that danger oh my God
52:00
why is he jumping on those
52:04
women we should help
52:08
them I I don't think they need any
52:10
help well I just called Joshua oh how'd
52:18
it go well I did my best to convince him
52:21
that I'm not some crazy girl who is
52:24
dying to get married and I'm just going
52:26
through a hard time what'd he say well
52:28
uh his answering machine was very
52:31
understanding I feel
52:37
blue hey you know what might cheer you
52:42
up
52:46
what you know I got to tell you this
52:50
really does put me in a better mood
52:53
H I wish there was a job where I could
52:57
wear this all the
52:59
time maybe someday there will
53:01
be oh God that's Chandler he's going to
53:06
come by and borrow some candles for his
53:08
big date oh okay no no Rachel don't get
53:09
it you see us no yet the groom cannot
53:12
see the bride you're not going to marry
53:14
Chandler not after
53:17
this okay guys just relax
53:21
I
53:29
do I got to
53:34
go yeah well that ought to do
53:41
[Music]
53:45
it
53:47
hello hello
53:51
Joey what's going on
53:57
what oh my God I know it's
54:02
stuck step how did he get on I put it on
54:09
to scare
54:13
Chandler oh my God Monica's going to
54:15
totally freak out well then help me get
54:18
it off plus it smells really bad in here
54:20
of course it smells really bad you have
54:24
your head up a dead
54:26
[Laughter]
54:32
animal did you get the turkey B oh my
54:37
God oh my
54:40
God who is that it's
54:42
Joey what what are you doing and is this
54:46
supposed to be funny no it's not
54:48
supposed to be funny it's supposed to be
54:50
scary get that off now I can't it's
54:53
stuck I don't care that that turkey has
54:56
to feed 20 people at my parents house
54:58
and they're not going to eat it off your
55:00
head hold on okay let's just I'll
55:02
think okay I got it D all right you pull
55:10
I'm going to spread the legs as wide as
55:15
I
55:16
can Joey no it's not the time sorry
55:19
right okay count to three one two
55:22
three it worked I scared you I knew
55:31
it I'm over here big guy yeah you are
55:36
[Music]
55:42
歌词与翻译
[中文]
天哪，那东西是做什么的
做呃，那是一台摘眼机
对了，我不开玩笑了，我开玩笑了
呃嗨，瑞秋，我是米勒莫妮卡博士告诉我
你有点紧张，但别
担心一切都会好起来的
所以我们就差不多完成了，但首先我们
必须开始，好吧，这是青光眼
测试呃哈坐
下来好吧把你的下巴放在这里
嗯现在你会感觉到每只眼睛里有一小股
一股空气什么
现在有一小股空气
在这里我们走吧好吧一二三
好吧对不起好吧我要留在这里
这次好吧准备好了呃呃一
两个我很抱歉你知道我要做什么
抱住她的头好吧好吧好吧
好吧一呃呃二我很抱歉你知道
你还年轻，你可能不知道
有
青光眼好吧，所以非常非常好
见到你，先生，嘿你是谁
你疯了，好吧，你有一个小未成年人
左眼感染，我希望你
每天服用这些药水三次，持续
周，你就会像新人一样好
不，我不，我不会在我的
眼睛里放东西，好吧，那么我想我们会再见到你
三个月后，太好了，我会给你戴上玻璃眼睛的
好吧，就给我
该死的
滴 Dr
Miller p e CF
D 非常好
莫妮卡，你知道他们在哪里，我确定
知道，但你没有得到
[音乐]
一个还好
甚至还没有接近好，那么你知道
我需要什么帮助，我做不到
好吧，来吧，我们来吧
好吧，坐下，好吧，好吧
把头向后仰，是的，好吧，
现在睁开眼睛，好吧，他们
我举起了多少根手指
四，天哪，我在想四
真的是的，好吧，你知道为什么
我们不从练习一开始好吗
好吧，不滴，很好，好吧，好吧
三一二
我的三个枕头都湿透了，你
说这是练习，那你为什么要移动
因为我知道你在
撒谎，好吧，过来你在做什么
莫妮卡停下来哦我的上帝停下来我
我要走了我把它翻过来我
要把这些水滴进你的眼睛哦我的
上帝你真的太奇怪了
坚强哦我的
[音乐]
上帝
天哪，你知道如果乔伊和钱德勒进来的话
现在我们可以为电视指南发一笔
财富，是的，不
什么哦，我的上帝，打开好吧
woo我们会在大约三四个
小时后见到你哦，对不起，我想我认为
可能错过了桌子哦，你呃呃
是的，你是吗，呃，是吗，你呃，
是的，你真的觉得
他很有吸引力哦，是的，你是在告诉我你
现在对莫妮卡一点兴趣都没有
现在
我认为这是我们
婚姻中第一次我觉得自己更
有吸引力
来吧迈克，你可以打败她
敲那只狗离开她的
头该死，我和
他一起睡觉游戏点不要太自大
记得我赢了最后一场哦，哦，
输给一个女孩的感觉如何
你知道在你打电话给自己之前你真的应该看看
镜子
不不不，就是这样
完成了，你们每个人都赢了一场比赛
我已经失去了
我的
生活中的一年，所以每个人都回家了，三分之二最好的获胜者
这就是我在想的
我应该利用我的隐形能力来打击
犯罪还是
邪恶为他们所有人服务，笨蛋你CH好吧
最好回来迈克最好回来
好吧你知道我会得到什么
祝酒
[音乐]
我的你们，你们这些家伙，我们
就在储藏室里，我们看到了这个
非常令人毛骨悚然的男人，就像是一个疯狂的
眼睛毛茸茸的野兽人，他就像
大脚怪或雪人什么的
他拿着斧子向我们冲来，所以
雷切尔不得不对他使用臭虫炸弹，是的
我我我拉了标签，我只是雾了
他的雪人
屁股呃像黑头发浓密的胡子是的
是的，你雾了
丹尼，我们没有雾丹尼，他是
丹尼丹尼刚搬到楼下
是的，他刚从这样的地方回来
在安第斯山脉的四次莫农迷航，真好
小伙子哦，他很好，他很好，你知道
你总是支持我们的人
雾妈妈，你放松一下吗？距离这里10
个街区，那个女人
在晚上独自行走，我永远不会做
妈妈停下来
担心这是一条安全的街道，这是一座
安全的建筑，
我没什么可去的，我没有要去
去好吧
没关系，你读了
论文我要买一个
锅，它不是为了
[音乐]
你好吧
很好读家庭
马戏团享受温柔
喜剧哦我的上帝哦我的上帝哦我的上帝哦
我的上帝哦天哪，天哪，天哪，天啊
[笑声]
你开放了
大家嗨嘿嘿，我能帮你吗，是的，我
正在寻找菲比，她还活着吗
在这里，呃，不，她不在了，但我可以
给她发消息，太好了，呃，告诉
她的丈夫停在她身边
什么，嘿，你怎么了？把你的手
从她身上拿开一秒钟哦，我觉得
很好，我认为
有必要，我我想感谢大家
来我的家人和我的朋友
呜，我真的想说我
嗯，你知道我真正想说的话
我
喝醉了，没错，爸爸妈妈
小心脏玛拉是
[笑声]
锤子，猜猜我之前喝了什么
，我抽了
香烟，你知道你知道的
没关系，没关系，因为我
今天30岁了
，我可以做任何我
想做的事情，因为我是
[音乐]
长大了，我的上帝，这些裤子我正在燃烧
来吧，她现在想依偎什么
她是不是想杀了我，就像
火山一样
你很热
不好吧，一定是我
然后那只是
沙发上的裤子嗯嘿你介意我使用
你的浴室哦继续谢谢
哦
嘿我最喜欢的部分即将到来
好吧天哪
[音乐]
你好乔伊，我是罗斯，我需要一些
帮助呃钱德勒不在这儿，你可以
帮助
我好吧，听我说，我在伊丽莎白的
浴室
很好，不，我的皮裤很热
所以我把它们脱掉了，但它们一定是
因为汗水或
什么东西或我的而缩水了腿因
的热量而膨胀，但我无法将它们恢复到
乔伊我
这不是一种相当
的情况呃你看到任何类似粉末的东西
什么粉末是的是的我有粉末很好
很好好吧在你的
腿上撒一些它会吸收一些水分
然后你就可以把裤子穿回
是的，坚持是的坚持
它们不会出现
伙计，嗯，你看到任何呃哦凡士林哦我我
看看乳液，我有乳液会起作用
是的，一定要在上面撒一些
坚持
罗斯，你还好，他们还是
仍然没有出现在伙计和乳液
上，粉末已经制成了
糊状物
真的呃什么颜色
它的区别确实
很好我只是如果浆糊匹配
裤子你可以给自己做一条
浆糊裤子，你不会知道
差异乔伊你有分钟吗
老兄我是什么呃雷切尔在这里这么好
幸运的人让我知道它是如何工作的
哦乔伊我有这样的问题呃
你的时机再好不过了我
今天到处都着火了
罗斯嗯你已经在那里
很长时间了我开始有点
吓坏了好吧我来了
嘿你能把灯
关掉吗不让我们把灯
开着哦天哪
我有一个
...
中的问题，你去
个孩子，然后孔雀咬了
我，请在
午夜吻我，你看到桑迪了哦，我不知道如何告诉你，但呃，她
...
在莫妮卡的卧室里，和
麦克斯
哦，看看我确实知道如何告诉
你们大家，球在响
p 是什么
掉进去，
快乐的时刻就在我们身上，看起来没有约会
打包的事情解决了，每个人看起来都很
快乐，我讨厌不是每个人都快乐
嘿鲍比
新快乐
你知道的一年，我呃只是想
把这个扔在这里，我不是数学高手，但
我确实相信那里是三个女孩和
三个男孩吗
在这里哦我不想亲吻任何人
今晚我不能亲吻任何人所以我
亲吻每个人不不不你不能亲吻
罗斯是你的兄弟哦是的那是
完美完美所以现在每个人都要去
亲吻但我好吧有人吻我
我有人吻我，这是午夜
有人亲吻有人亲我，现在是
午夜
[鼓掌]
你的指甲很奇怪哦我知道我
从不戴假指甲我只是这么做了所以我的
妈妈不会因为咬
而让我悲伤 他们哦不，我的意思是你很奇怪
现在只有九个
哦我的
上帝等等一分钟我就抓住了他，当我把
哦天哪，它在
基什里哦天哪，好吧，别惊慌，我
要去商店，我要去
给你再买一套指甲，没有人
会知道，你会看起来
很棒哦哦，因为他们要
吃那个
问题，亲爱的，别咬你的
指甲，好吧，请不要惊慌，嗯，
，但是，呃，
其中一个 kich 杯子里有一个蓝色指甲，没有办法
知道哪一个
杯子以及找到它的人将赢得
[音乐]
[掌声]
奖品，看看你们大家甜蜜天真
和他们一起睡得像个天使
胖乎乎的小手搂着
你，没关系艾玛，你留下来
[音乐]
睡着了，远离
CRI 没关系，没关系 R 是我把
放在
发圈上，你干得怎么样我
听到艾玛在动，所以我进来了
确保她能拥抱哦哦
谢谢，好吧好吧，现在我起床了
我要去趟洗手间，好吧
你走吧
亲爱的，这还没结束
好吧，现在记住我
教你的一切，你会没事的
我们准备好，等待这个座位真的
不舒服，但也许在我们开始之前
我们应该再买一个也许
，比如飞机座椅或豆子包
椅子，宝贝，你无法摆脱这个
好吧，你必须学习如何骑
自行车，为什么我必须
好好学习以防紧急情况
什么样的紧急情况，如果一个
男人走过来，用枪指着你的
头，说你骑这辆自行车，否则
我会开枪
你没事，我会响铃响铃
分散他的注意力，然后我会用中国人
枪从他手中敲下来，好吧，菲，只要骑上
投掷
明星把
自行车，嘿，我会扶住你，然后
推你
好吧，你不会放手
不，你发誓，我
发誓，好吧，来
吧，我们在这里好吧好吧
好吧感觉很好好吧试着踩踏板
就是这样你做得很好你
做得很好是是是控制
[鼓掌]
是
不你得分我我只是以为你
做得很好
震惊
震惊这是一个合法的学习
技术进来我一直在等待
[音乐]
你嗨，我只想哦我的上帝哦我的
上帝我的上帝哦上帝我很抱歉抱歉我
嗯我正在小睡，因为有人在
小睡哦上帝莫妮卡告诉我你
位置小睡了
在等一个人请告诉我你在
在等一个人，是的，我是一个
来自
工作的人，我正在和一个来自工作的人
哈，来自你的
餐厅的那个可爱的服务员，那个看起来像
没有威胁性的雷
Leota啊哈，你知道什么只是
给我一秒钟，我会失去你的
头发，我回来时只是要拿一件夹克
...
我想要每一个小
细节，也许那就是他，好吧，好吧
嗯，这只是乔
罗斯，你们为什么不去看电影
我们在，但罗斯在手机上说话那么大声
，他们把我们赶了出去，我
不得不大声说话，因为电影
大声，他正在伦敦说话，哦我的上帝
他联系了吗艾米丽好吧，不
还没有打电话给她身边的
家庭的每个人，希望有人会
帮助他与她取得联系，我不
在乎我是否说了其他女孩的名字
你这个拘谨的老
傻瓜罗斯以一种讨好
[笑声]
家庭的方式，我很高兴你们都在这里
我的办公室终于有了无皱纹的事实
纸我知道我的生活进展得很好
但我环顾四周，我看到那么多
人在
的时候完成了 那么多的目标
他们30岁了是的，但你不应该
将自己与
[掌声]
我在那里
[掌声]
你我在嬉皮士跳一英里时做到了
这就是我在30岁之前
想做的一切哦，除了我想
和我姐姐修补关系哦好吧
但是耶
而且女孩们，这件事是天赐之物，如果
你知道我的意思
好吧，你可以洗澡，但我正在
现在你只是一个女孩
在
浴缸里嘿嗨泡泡
男人气概很好我只是想我会顺便
顺便告诉你我是如何和乔伊一起去的
你告诉她
她把它从我身上拉出来，她就像一个
对话巫师
进展如何顺利你错了
他不喜欢我什么是的，
如果我送你去李少校的
家，我告诉你他喜欢你
，然后你去了那里，你发现
他不喜欢你，你
你
会怎么想 觉得我真的不在乎李
少校是
你好，我们在浴室
为什么因为这是一段轻松又
令人愉快的
时间，你们在
这里做什么啊天啊，一个朋友，他用不同的眼光看待
，但这是错误的，这是瑞秋
你喜欢瑞秋，他看起来没什么大不了的
好吧，菲比和我谈过这件事，
只是一种迷恋，它会消失的，伙计
你必须重新安排你的泡泡
哇哦，强悍
嘿嘿，罗斯和我在找你
我们都在
这里做什么哦
我亲爱的用
船把它盖起来你好，是的，我们都在这里
我们很高兴你加入
我们嘿发生了什么事哦很酷的船哦
不
嘿，你告诉他了吗，我在
等你告诉我们，我们
有一个女孩
[掌声]
[音乐]
哦，我稍后会告诉你，在你或罗斯的战斗中，谁能踢谁
屁股，没有
问题，所以你认为罗斯
你也选择了罗斯，罗斯真的
很强，好吧他是
你们三个人中最强的，除了乔伊
我不敢相信你没有选择我呃
在她的辩护中她是对的我更强大
我会摧毁
你哦真的你认为你更强大
你为什么不证明
它哦我会证明它我会像
他们一样证明它等等好吧停止它停止它现在停下
这
公寓里没有人会打架，嘿，莫妮卡人们来看
一场战斗，让我们给他们他们来的东西
因为你们可以扳手腕是的，听
...
护士的话，你要下去了哦，是的，你
认真地往城里走
伙计们，垃圾话
让你尴尬知道我在想什么
哦
okay
how it's been so long since you've had
sex you're wondering if they've changed
it no although now that's what I'm
thinking all right so what were you
thinking well I was thinking that you
gave the guy Such Great Haircuts I
thought maybe you'd like to do mine oh
no why not because I'm just I'm
incredibly anal and an unbelievable
control freak no you're not I know I'm
not but you are and I was trying to
spare your feelings
you know it's funny last time Paula was
here my hair was so much shorter and
cuter all right okay but but you have to
promise that you will not be all like
controlly and bossy and all you know
Monica about
it I promise all right let's see now
some of you are going to get cut and
some of you
aren't but I promise none of you will
feel a thing
[Music]
all right that's it I Quit what I didn't
say anything yeah but this isn't the
face of a person who trusts a person
okay this is the face of a person who
you know doesn't trust a
person I'm sorry sorry phoe it's just
well just a little shorter than what we
had disc
would you relax I know what I am doing
this is how he wears
it how who wears it Demi
Moore Demi Moore is not a he well he was
a he in Arthur and
in that's Dudley Moore I said I wanted
it like demim more oh oh oh my God oh my
God oh my God oh my God I'm sorry I'm
sorry I'm sorry which one is demore
she's the actress that was in disclosure
and decent proposal ghost oh oh she's
got Gorgeous Hair
I how is
she it's too soon to
tell she's resting which is a good
sign how's the hair I'm not going to lie
to you Ross it doesn't look good
I put a clip on one side which seems to
have stopped the
冰壶你好你好是罗斯，呃不
他不能，我可以留言吗，是的，这位
是拉塞尔·罗斯的离婚律师
告诉他，既然我没有收到
他的消息，我想他决定尝试一下
婚姻，罗斯又结婚了
[掌声]
不，好吧，继续吧，我们正在逐步淘汰
口音，逐步淘汰
，所以无需重新测试他们的结果
在
实验室中，团队永远不会
识别出他们的
碳测年中的初始错误
n在这
点上有什么问题吗
口音
再来一次这是什么
废话好吧我不是
英语我来自长岛
我真的紧张，
口音刚刚出来
我
抱歉，如果我们能回到
...
讲座，嗯，对
，好吧，看我只是
古生物学有任何疑问吗
试图给人留下良好的第一印象
显然我搞砸了，但是你们
对我的看法非常重要，因为
我希望在这里找到一份永久工作
所以如果你再给我一次
机会给我留下好印象
拉斯你疯了吗我还是
你的妻子你从来没有去
告诉我
你到底出了什么问题哦我可以杀了
你很好瑞秋你可以穿这个
谢谢
好吧，我正在把手机设置
，但我还是
这里只是不要去任何地方，我还是
这里不要切换或任何东西，因为
我就在这里，就一秒
一秒一秒等一秒
莫妮卡，我害怕
这是一个袖子，好吧
我们还有免提电话，请保持通话
您的电话对我们很重要
嘿，等等，您必须挂断电话，因为我们
要迟到了，谢谢您的
耐心等待，您是下一个来电者，是的，是的
我是您要让的下一个来电者
我挂断电话
嘿，你能带一只鸭子和一只小鸡去
...
剧院吗？当然不行，我只是想让
他们听听某人的声音
否则嗨，是我哦，我的
上帝啊，珍妮丝，你叫了
珍妮丝，是的，珍妮丝，为什么这样
你很难理解你
记得珍妮丝
对，是的，她很聪明，她很漂亮
而且她真诚地关心我珍妮丝
是我和
某人的最后一次机会
你好哦我的
上帝呀看看她多胖
嘿嘿
[音乐]
大家珍妮丝你是的是的我
是它是你的哈你希望
钱德勒
Bing你正在看一个已婚女士
现在哦
是的
恭喜哦亲爱的我很抱歉你
不能通过电话告诉我这件事
还有什么想念你脸上的表情
哦不珍妮丝喜欢
她的乐趣
我我
永远所以这是
布鲁克林好吧听着，通常只有
每种尺寸都有一件衣服，所以
当他们打开这些门时，现在呈扇形散开
这就是你要找的东西，记住
当你找到
衣服时，对着这三件衣服吹气，
当你听到它来时，会发出尖锐的爆炸声
，好吧，哦，他们在推，
，他们在推，别是个
宝贝，嘿，雷切尔来
[音乐]
不不不是
它不拥挤我
这就是这件衣服，天哪
太完美了，很抱歉这条被拿走了
哇梅根·莫妮卡你来了，这是
我的衣服
不，是的，你看到我穿着它
现在你会看到我买你想要的东西
怪胎，如果不是我，你根本不会知道
这个地方，你看你
不想和我打架，也许我真的想打架，我
漂亮
精力充沛，我来了我来
嘿
好吧嘿，我该做什么
[音乐]
你在做什么
在做什么
衣服你找到了吗
的衣服可以带我离开这里 phi 这些便宜货
菜刀太疯狂了，我们必须抓住莫妮卡
不，你必须握住我的手，我的
上帝对不起，对不起
我走吧
[掌声]
走吧，你知道我是否真的很热，嗯我
我喜欢拿起这把刀，嗯
我把冷钢放在
嗯我的身体上
你还好吗，好吧，我是
[音乐]
[掌声]
[音乐]
好吧，我们这里有什么20岁的
男性，他的右边有一个脚趾被切断
脚，你能不能别做那只脚
首先你知道他的伤在哪里
脚趾你刚才说
上面写着这里刀是向右的
当然是穿过你的鞋的
它们是用
柳条做的，你带了tap吗，哦，是的，我
把它放在
冰上，别担心，儿子我们只需重新连接
它，
那是什么你带来了
胡萝卜，这不是你的脚趾，这是
一块非常冷的小块
胡萝卜你真是一根胡萝卜哦天哪
我的厨房里有一个脚趾，先生们
你们先起来好吧好吧你们有30
秒闪电轮开始停止
现在莫妮卡的昵称是什么
她是一个曲棍球守门员大胖子
守门员
正确雷切尔声称这是她
最喜欢的电影危险地，一旦正确
，她最喜欢的电影是我们的
伯尼
正确的是她身体的哪个部位
莫妮卡在14岁时被一支铅笔卡住
你是谁
没有她
耳朵好吧莫妮卡对她进行分类
毛巾有多少类别
日常使用高级客人高级客人两
秒没有
11 令人难以置信的 11 是
[鼓掌]
正确，这是
伙计们的四个，女士们，你们都来了
在 30 秒内，答对了 5 个
个问题赢得了比赛，闪电
回合现在开始，乔伊最喜欢的是什么
食物三明治对了 钱德勒第一次碰触时
多大了女孩文胸
14 否 19 谢谢
男人乔伊有一个想象中的童年
朋友他的名字叫莫里斯，纠正他的
职业是太空牛仔
纠正钱德勒·宾的
工作是什么哦天哪，这与
与数字和处理有关，它携带一个
公文包 10 秒你需要这个，否则
你会输掉游戏，嗯与转发有关
哦哦哦他
反式F反式
这甚至不是一个
字我能得到这个我能得到
[鼓掌]
这找不到垃圾袋哦好吧我
我想我在
这里看到了一些东西，那是什么
我不知道，但也许如果我们把那个
抽屉关上，它就会
死掉，我们活着
[音乐]
这里什么什么是什么，你看到
衣柜的 大小吗？我不敢相信我们住在这里
...
这里
嘿嘿，怎么样，我度过了一段美好的
时光，嗯 Chanty 另一方面，我会
讲故事，进展顺利，我让
他赢了，我们在一起了，他甚至说
我可以叫他爸爸，什么
他让你不要叫他
爸爸，好吧，看这里
的故事，我们刚刚打完
壁球，我们要去
蒸汽
我走进蒸汽房，
真的
蒸汽，所以我摘下眼镜，
那就是这里发生的事情
坐下
儿子嘿
[掌声]
[音乐]
[掌声]
天哪，钱德勒，我简直不敢相信，我
知道你给了我父亲一圈
跳舞，为什么他们在
那里投入这么多蒸汽，否则他们必须称之为
房间
[音乐]
房间为什么好吧为什么为什么会发生
来吧，这没什么大不了的
没什么大不了的，那里有
触摸了
的东西，我知道你想与我的
爸爸建立联系，但你真的必须与
那
部分建立联系吗？听着，我确信爸爸不会
关心他可能认为这真的是
有趣的是，他会讲这个故事
年，我不想让他讲这个
故事
年哦，但是他
他还会讲一个关于
莫妮卡如何试图逃离肥胖的故事
营地没有逃脱那么你怎么
被带刺的铁丝网困住了
我试图帮助松鼠
你想吃东西
如果那是你父亲打电话给
讲这个故事，那么婚姻就
结束了，来吧
你好，对不起，你打错了
号码，好吧，我稍后再打电话给你爸爸，我
爱你
[音乐]
好吧，我要去见你爸爸了，哇
哇，你是不是有点
穿得太多了是的，你最好让
确保他给你这个
次的表情，我想我会尝试
说服他不要再讲这个故事
，我想出最好的方法
那就是面对面，面对面，我
不是指他的腿，我说的脸也不是
指我的
屁股，所以你明白我会感觉很多
如果你不告诉
人发生了什么事，你知道我会感到更舒服，我是
个小孩子，对此我有点尴尬
我完全明白，没有什么比
在姻亲面前让自己难堪
更可怕的了
事实上，当我开始约会
朱迪时，我失业了，她父亲
问我什么我以谋生为生，我
告诉他我是一名律师，当他们发现他们从未这样做过时，你
会做什么
如果你看到我给他们提供法律
建议，不仅仅是
我们会
所以我想我们穿着泳衣
在这里，你好
[掌声]
[音乐]
你好，今天我们要去首先播放一些关于 Barnyard
歌曲 哦，M 中的牛动了
动物的
哦，我中的牛哞哞叫，然后
农民敲了他的头，把他磨碎了
，这就是我们得到的
[掌声]
汉堡包
鸡肉你好，一桩婚姻
拜托，是的，你想好好结婚
有一个服务正在进行，请有
座位，好吧
[音乐]
你在做什么哦，这就是婚礼
进行曲不仅让你害怕
因为这是毕业
歌曲好吧，这就是我们要
结婚你确定要这样做吗
[鼓掌]
你好，R 女士，你好，
对
好吧，你进你的房间试试这些
，我们会看到我们会更好地了解
的效果，谢谢你
这么好的朋友，这太
牙签太奇怪了
是的，你现在在尝试什么
水果卷和美味的
乔伊等一下，等一下，我们有
一个获胜者，哪个
一个傻瓜不再那么愚蠢了
，最酷的是这个角色
来自那不勒斯，是的，我整个
全家都来自那不勒斯，太好了
好吧，我已经听到了我需要的一切
听到我们只需要
呃
莱斯利呃乔伊，这是尴尬的部分
哦嘿，对了，这不是问题，我完全
明白你需要知道
确保我没有任何可怕的疤痕或
纹身，不是吗
担心我没有什么可
隐藏的，所以你走吧，这就是我100%
自然
[笑声]
好吧，格拉玛斯向你的新
家问好哦
我的哇哦，她真好，
大哦莫妮卡，你要去哪里
展示格拉图斯哦所以
自豪的是，我们还没有真正确定
的位置，嘿，在
电视上方怎么样，这样它将是你看到的第一个
东西当你走进
门是的，你可以摆脱
那张法国海报我喜欢那张海报
真的没有任何东西出来
的
它或者也许有她的地方
在你的卧室不上面什么都没有
你的床上你还在吗
在这里本你准备好了是的好吧给
我你的脚好吧好吧三本一
二三走
来吧B好吧好吧
你在做什么
看清楚苏珊我看到什么似乎是
一个黑暗
通风口等等是的，它实际上是一个黑暗
通风口phes它打开了它是
打开等等你忘记了你的腿
[鼓掌]
[音乐]
你在哪里
说长话了，亲爱的卡罗尔，我
需要你继续推动我需要我，我
需要对不起我可以吗
这好吧好吧，这个房间里有几个
太多人了
即将再有一个，所以任何
不是前夫或女同性恋生活的人
和你搭档
走吧，祝你们好运，祝你好运
幸运的是，让我问你，你必须成为
卡罗尔的女同性恋生活伴侣，这是我的
真正的父亲，我只是我想要事情
恰到好处，pH值，我完全
理解，是的，无论你
需要，嘿，你想回家，好吧，谢谢
再次抱歉
[笑声]
...
是什么，呃，我猜阈值
清楚了
现在嘿嘿小偷哦嘿嘿狗怎么样了
是的，好吧，我和兽医谈过了
状态很好，无论如何，他说
小跌倒会没事，我
明天可以接他哦，很好，谢谢
天啊，是的，但他确实得缝了
一堆针，他说狗的耳朵只有
千载难逢
才能长回来
所以嘿嘿，你们在忙什么
哦，我们今天去上自卫课
哇耶，踢了一个家伙的胯部
早上真的很累
你把它从
你现在我们可以踢任何人的屁股
是的，一堂课后我不这么认为
你想看我自卫
我自己去那里假装你是
一个性掠夺者，继续我敢说
当然你可以保护自己免受
一场你知道即将到来的攻击
看够了，我学了很长时间的空手道
时间，有一个概念你应该
真正熟悉，这就是
日本人所说的
鳗鱼不是一种
寿司，不，这是一个概念，是的，它是
它是淡水
好吧，也许这也意味着
哦，我会为了鲑鱼皮卷而杀人
对
现在没有罚款受到攻击我什至不
关心来吧罗斯我们很抱歉请
告诉我们这是什么
鳗鱼是一种完全的
意识状态好吗只有实现真正的
鳗鱼你才能为任何危险做好准备
可能降临到
你的意思是万一有人试图
偷你的竹睡垫或你的
一壶
鱼，我想说的是，这是一回事
为攻击做好准备
就像彼此完全是另一个故事
为攻击做好准备，我不
知道像
[笑声]
好吧，你知道
即将到来，但这并不意味着你有
鳗鱼
[鼓掌]
哦，你知道吗，如果我们预订了
，我们可以在大约半小时内吃到鳗鱼
[音乐]
[笑声]
小时，这节课到底是什么
...
鳗鱼的重要性 你是个怪人
也许现在我很好奇
在那些少女般的尖叫声中，你会在什么时候
已经开始踢我的
屁股了，所以我们没有
做好准备，很抱歉我不得不采取如此
激烈的措施来表达我的观点，但我
看起来我只是希望你们
安全危险
呃哈
[音乐]
[掌声]
鳗鱼
[笑声]
[掌声]
危险
啊鲑鱼皮卷
[音乐]
帽子说杰克是的亚历克斯TRC哦当然
查克威利绝对菲比你会
找不到一个游戏节目主持人
我不能
踢
不说我们是
unagi，这不是你本身，而是
你拥有的东西
说你知道我可以轻松地从中得到什么
，但你有可能
可能会变得非常非常
受伤，呃哈无处
跑我不喜欢坐在这里，我
要回顾一下他们在这里的仪式
首先
[笑声]
为什么罗斯要这么做危险，天哪
他为什么要跳到那些东西上
我们应该帮助
的女性，我认为她们不需要任何
帮助得很好，我刚刚给约书亚打了电话，哦，怎么样
一切顺利，我尽力说服他
我不是一个疯狂的女孩，
渴望结婚，我只是要
度过一段艰难的时期，他说得好
呃，他的答录机非常好
理解我的感觉
蓝色嘿你知道什么会让你高兴起来
振作起来
你知道吗我要告诉你这
确实让我心情更好
我希望有一份工作让我可以
一直穿着这
时间也许有一天会
天哪，那是钱德勒，他会
过来借一些蜡烛给他的
重要约会哦，好吧，不，瑞秋，不要明白
，你还没有看到我们，新郎还看不到你不会结婚的新娘
...
钱德勒，不要在
这好吧，大家放松一下
我
我必须
走吧，应该做的
[音乐]
它
你好你好
乔伊发生了什么事
天啊我知道这是
他怎么踩上去的我把它穿上
来吓唬
钱德勒哦我的上帝莫妮卡要
完全吓坏了然后帮我把它脱下来
而且这里闻起来很臭
当然闻起来很臭你
你的头已经死了
[笑声]
动物你得到火鸡了吗B哦我的
上帝哦我的
上帝是谁，那是
乔伊你在做什么，这
应该很有趣，不，不是
应该很有趣，它应该是
可怕，现在我不能脱掉它它被
卡住了，我不在乎那只火鸡有
在我父母家里养活20个人
，他们不会把你的
头吃掉，好吧，让我们只是我
想好吧，我明白了，好吧，你拉
我要把腿张开到
我
可以，乔伊，不，现在还不到时候，对不起
对了，好吧，数到三一二
三，它有效了，我吓到你了，我知道
我在这儿，大家伙，是的，你是
[音乐]
[英语]
Show
重点词汇
开始练习
| 词汇 | 含义 |
|---|---|
|
glaucoma /ɡlɔːˈkəʊmə/ C1 |
|
|
invisibility /ˌɪnvɪzɪˈbɪlɪti/ B2 |
|
|
unagi /uːˈnɑːgi/ C1 |
|
|
Yeti /ˈjɛti/ B2 |
|
|
bug /bʌɡ/ A2 |
|
|
bomb /bɒm/ B1 |
|
|
drops /drɒps/ A2 |
|
|
puff /pʌf/ B1 |
|
|
practice /ˈpræktɪs/ B1 |
|
|
dangerous /ˈdeɪn.dʒər.əs/ B2 |
|
|
attack /əˈtæk/ B2 |
|
|
creepy /ˈkriː.pi/ B2 |
|
|
freakish /ˈfriːk.ɪʃ/ C1 |
|
|
stitch /stɪtʃ/ B1 |
|
|
glass /ɡlæs/ A1 |
|
|
panic /ˈpænɪk/ B2 |
|
重点语法结构
-
oh my God what does that thing do
➔ 间接疑问句 (jiānjiē yíwèn jù)
➔ 这句话使用“what does...do”代替直接疑问句“What does that thing do?”，将疑问句嵌入主句中。这是用于礼貌或不直接询问的常见结构。
-
uhoh hi Rachel I'm Dr Miller
➔ 感叹词和同位语 (gǎntàncí hé tóngwèiyǔ)
➔ “Uhoh”是一个表达惊讶或领悟的感叹词。“Dr. Miller”是一个同位语，重新命名或进一步识别“我”。
-
Monica told me you were a little nervous
➔ 间接引语 (jiānjiē yǐnyǔ)
➔ 这句话展示了间接引语。原始陈述（“You are a little nervous”）由莫妮卡报告，导致时态和代词使用发生变化。
-
okay so we're done then almost but first we got to start
➔ 缩写和情态动词 (suōxiě hé qíngtài dòngcí)
➔ “We're”是“we are”的缩写。“got to”作为情态动词表达义务或必要性。句子结构有些不合逻辑，产生喜剧效果。
-
okay ready uhhuh one two
➔ 话语标记和最小回应 (huàyǔ biāojì hé zuìxiǎo huíyìng)
➔ “Okay”和“uhhuh”是话语标记和最小回应，用于表示理解并鼓励继续。它们不携带重要的语法重量，但对于自然的对话流程至关重要。
相关歌曲