Amish Paradise – English Lyrics

• By: "Weird" Al Yankovic

Lyrics & Translation

Embark on a unique linguistic and cultural journey with "Weird Al" Yankovic's "Amish Paradise"! This clever parody of Coolio's "Gangsta's Paradise" offers a fantastic opportunity to explore the English language through humor and satire. By contrasting the slang and themes of 90s hip-hop with the simple, traditional lifestyle of the Amish, the song is a masterclass in wordplay, irony, and cultural references. Learning with this song is not just about vocabulary; it's about understanding nuance, context, and how language can be used to create comedic genius. It's a fun and unforgettable way to appreciate the creativity of English.

[English]

(intense hiphop music)

♪ As I walk through the valley where I harvest my grain ♪

♪ I take a look at my wife and realize she's very plain ♪

♪ But that's just perfect for an Amish like me ♪

♪ You know, I shun fancy things like electricity ♪

♪ At 4:30 in the morning, I'm milkin' cows ♪

♪ Jebediah feeds the chickens and Jacob plows, fool ♪

♪ And I've been milkin' and plowin' so long that ♪

♪ Even Ezekiel thinks that my mind is gone ♪

♪ I'm a man of the land, I'm into discipline ♪

♪ Got a Bible in my hand and a beard on my chin ♪

♪ But if I finish all of my chores, and you finish thine ♪

♪ Then tonight we're gonna party like it's 1699 ♪

♪ We been spending most our lives ♪

♪ Living in an Amish paradise ♪

♪ I churned butter once or twice ♪

♪ Living in an Amish paradise ♪

♪ It's hard work and sacrifice ♪

♪ Living in an Amish paradise ♪

♪ We sell quilts at discount price ♪

♪ Living in an Amish paradise ♪

♪ A local boy kicked me in the butt last week ♪

♪ I just smiled at him and I turned the other cheek ♪

♪ I really don't care, in fact I wish him well ♪

♪ 'Cause I'll be laughing my head off ♪

♪ When he's burning in hell ♪

♪ But I ain't never punched a tourist even if he deserved it ♪

♪ An Amish with a 'tude ♪

♪ You know that's unheard of ♪

♪ I never wear buttons but I got a cool hat ♪

♪ And my homies agree I really look good in black, fool ♪

♪ If you come to visit, you'll be bored to tears ♪

♪ We haven't even paid the phone bill in 300 years ♪

♪ But we ain't really quaint ♪

♪ So please don't point and stare ♪

♪ We're just technologically impaired ♪

♪ There's no phone, no lights, no motorcar ♪

♪ Not a single luxury ♪

♪ Like Robinson Crusoe ♪

♪ It's as primitive as can be ♪

♪ We been spending most our lives ♪

♪ Living in an Amish paradise ♪

♪ We're just plain and simple guys ♪

♪ Living in an Amish paradise ♪

♪ There's no time for sin and vice ♪

♪ Living in an Amish paradise ♪

♪ We don't fight, we all play nice ♪

♪ Living in an Amish paradise ♪

♪ Hitching up the buggy, churning lots of butter ♪

♪ Raised a barn on Monday, soon I'll raise another ♪

♪ Think you're really righteous ♪

♪ Think you're pure in heart ♪

♪ Well, I know I'm a million times as humble as thou art ♪

♪ I'm the pious guy the little Amlettes wanna be like ♪

♪ On my knees day and night ♪

♪ Scoring points for the afterlife ♪

♪ So don't be vain and don't be whiny ♪

♪ Or else, my brother ♪

♪ I might have to get medieval on your heinie ♪

♪ We been spending most our lives ♪

♪ Living in an Amish paradise ♪

♪ We're all crazy Mennonites ♪

♪ Living in an Amish paradise ♪

♪ There's no cops or traffic lights ♪

♪ Living in an Amish paradise ♪

♪ But you'd probably think it bites ♪

♪ Living in an Amish paradise ♪

♪ Oh ♪

♪ Oh ♪

(singers groaning)

Key Vocabulary

Vocabulary	Meanings
harvest /ˈhɑːrvɪst/ B1	noun - the process of gathering crops verb - to gather crops
grain /ɡreɪn/ A2	noun - the seeds of cereal plants used for food
fancy /ˈfænsi/ B2	adjective - elaborate, decorative, or expensive
electricity /ɪˌlekˈtrɪsəti/ B2	noun - a form of energy resulting from the existence of charged particles
milking /ˈmɪlkɪŋ/ B1	verb - to draw milk from the udder of a cow
plow /plaʊ/ B2	noun - a tool used for turning over soil verb - to turn over soil with a plow
mind /maɪnd/ B1	noun - the part of a person that thinks, feels, and perceives
discipline /ˈdɪsəplɪn/ B2	noun - training to improve self-control or obedience
beard /bɪərd/ A2	noun - hair growing on the chin and cheeks of a man
chin /tʃɪn/ A1	noun - the protruding part of the face below the mouth
party /ˈpɑːrti/ A2	noun - a social gathering for celebration
sacrifice /ˈsækrɪfaɪs/ B2	noun - the act of giving up something for a higher purpose
quilt /kwɪlt/ B2	noun - a thick bed covering made of padding and fabric
kicked /kɪkt/ A2	verb - to strike with the foot
cheek /tʃiːk/ A1	noun - the soft part of the face below the eye

Key Grammar Structures

• I’ve been milkin’ and plowin’ so long that even Ezekiel thinks that my mind is gone

  ➔ Present perfect continuous tense

  ➔ Used to describe an action that started in the past and is still ongoing or has recently stopped.

• Then tonight we're gonna party like it's 1699

  ➔ Simile with 'like'

  ➔ Uses 'like' to compare the party to a specific time in history, indicating a festive or exaggerated celebration.

• We haven’t even paid the phone bill in 300 years

  ➔ Present perfect tense

  ➔ Expresses an action that started in the past and continues to the present, emphasizing the duration or result.

• We haven’t fought, we all play nice

  ➔ Present perfect tense and simple present tense

  ➔ Uses present perfect to indicate a behavior not occurred up to now, and simple present to describe habitual actions.

• Think you're really righteous / Think you're pure in heart

  ➔ Second person singular present tense with modal 'think'

  ➔ Expresses the opinion or belief of the subject about themselves using 'think' in the present tense.

• Cause I’ll be laughing my head off when he’s burning in hell

  ➔ Future simple tense with 'will' and present participle

  ➔ Uses 'will' to describe a future intention or expectation, with a present participle indicating ongoing action.